I shake my head. “Looks painful.”
“Yeah, it hurts sometimes but it’s okay.” She looks at her reflection in the mirror once I’ve zipped the dress up. Her blue eyes are wide as she examines the back. “This will do for the day.”
I try not to laugh. “You look very pretty,” I say truthfully.
“You wanna see something?” she asks and bolts from the bathroom, bringing back a photo. “This is my mom. Everyone tells me I look like her.” She hands me the frame. It’s a picture of a woman in her early forties, with short black hair and blue eyes like Becca’s. “You do look just like her,” I say. “Where is your mom?”
“She was at work when the disease started. She never made it home, so I don’t know where she is,” she answers, taking the photo from my hands and staring at Sam. “You’re really cute.”
He giggles as he smiles at her, like he knows what she's said. I put him down on the floor, allowing him to run around while attempting to keep an eye on him. Becca follows him around the house and explains what every item is-in elaborate detail- that he chooses to pick up.
“Macy, we finished the grave.” I look up to see Jonah standing a few feet from me. “I figured you would want to help bury your friend, so Eli will watch the kids until we’ve finished.”
Becca immediately objects. “Dad, please, I want to be there for the service too.”
He looks at me expectantly, like it’s my decision. “I think we should all be out there,” I offer. “I think Sasha would like that.”
We wrap her body in a tarp before lowering her into the grave. It takes us just under a few minutes to completely fill the hole, but I’m already sweating from the Georgia heat. Once she’s buried, none of us know what to say. I knew her the longest and even that wasn’t anything over twelve hours. All I say is that she’s with her daughter and she must be the happiest she’s been in a long time. Towards the end of our make-shift service, Becca places a wild flower at the top of the grave.
My minds replays the sight of lowering her body into the grave over and over again. It never stops. I keep reminding myself it’s my fault. It’s my fault she’s buried in the ground. It’s my fault she’s not breathing. My knees start to go weak and once the funeral is over, I take a seat on the wide porch steps to prevent my legs from giving out. Everyone goes inside except for Eli.
This day just keeps getting better.
“Hey,” Eli says, standing directly in front of me. “You wanna go for a walk? Clear your head? I need to check-out a few houses down a couple of blocks for supplies anyways.”
I stare at him. The last place I want to be is somewhere alone with him. But he has a point, it would be nice to leave and focus on something else. Maybe run into a few walkers and get a rush of adrenaline. Anything to take my mind off Sasha.
I check to make sure my knife is in my pocket. “Sure, we can do that.”
“So where are you from, originally?” he asks once we’re out on the street.
“Athens,” I answer. “You?”
“Augusta,” he says, walking too close beside me. “We moved out here when I was eleven and then my mom married Jonah’s dad.”
“You’re step-brothers then?” I widen the distance between us.
“Yeah, we are. I’ve been living with him since I was nineteen.”
“And how old are you now?”
“Twenty-five.” He waits a beat. “You?”
“Twenty-one. I guess I could be twenty-two now.”
He laughs. “Isn’t it funny how things like that don’t matter anymore?”
I look at him from the corner of my eye. His boyish smile is somewhat charming. “Yeah,” I agree. “A lot of things don’t matter anymore.”
He nods. “What did you like to do before the world went to shit?”
I’m not sure why he continues to ask me questions, unless he’s just trying to make conversation. “I liked to run,” I reply, smiling a little at the memory.
“You see that blue house at the end of the street?” He points to it.
“Yeah, is tha-“
“Race you to it. One two three go!” He takes off running.
I have no say in the matter as my legs instantly follow him. In a matter of seconds, I’m close behind him, the wind rushing against my face. I feel weightless, like I’m gliding instead of running. The sound of our feet smacking against the pavement makes me smile. I can’t remember the last time I ran simply because I wanted to.
“Damn you’re fast!” he pants as I pass him.
I beat him to the house, easily, and have to wait a few seconds for him to catch up. “Please tell me you ran track in college or some shit,” he grins at me.
“University of Georgia, full ride,” I respond.
He grabs a paper clip from his pocket and effortlessly picks the lock on the front door.
“Where did you learn that?” I’m more than concerned that he knows how to pick a lock. I should have listened to my gut. It was a bad idea to leave myself alone with him.
“Becca taught me.” He pushes the door open.
I pause. “What?”
“She went through a phase of being addicted to YouTube. The girl knows how to do everything now. I think she unclogged the drain once,” he replies, shutting the door behind me.
The house is covered in dust. There’s papers and other items I can’t make out scattered across the floor, like the people living here were in a hurry to leave. Eli goes to search the rooms upstairs while I investigate the kitchen. I have high hopes of finding food. If the family living here left in a hurry they’re bound to have forgotten something.
I open the pantry door and find a few cans of vegetables. Setting the contents down on the counter, I begin searching through the cupboards. Something on the highest shelf catches my eye. I have to climb onto the counter in order to reach it, struggling to maintain my balance so I don’t fall off. I grab a few plates that are in the way and suddenly my legs start to shake beneath me. The dishes slip from my hands. The glass shatters everywhere. The sound of them hitting the floor makes me scream. A few pieces hit my face, slicing my cheek open.
“Macy, what the fuck?” Eli’s voice booms.
I turn to see him coming towards me, expecting him to comfort me like he did with Sasha. “They just slip-“
He grabs me by my wrist, throwing me off the counter, and I slice my hand open on more glass to stop myself from falling.
“What the fuck do you thinking you’re doing?” His eyes are dark and his fists clench at his sides. “Are you trying to get us killed? Those sick things out there can hear a noise like that from a mile away. Are you fucking stupid? How can you be so fucking careless?” He grabs the collar of my shirt, forcing me up.
I want to say something. I need to say something. I can feel my heart vibrate in my skull. I can feel it pound in my ears and in my chest. My head is spinning. I’m frozen with fear. He keeps looking at me with raging eyes and I swear he’s going to kill me.
It suddenly hits me: I deserve this.
I deserve to be treated like this. I deserve to be thrown on the ground. I deserve to be yelled at and to have my hands sliced open from shards of glass. I deserve some slow, agonizing, torturous death and I hope he gives it to me.
“Don’t you ever make a fucking mistake like that again.” He pulls me closer to him. Glancing down at my hands, he notices the blood dripping from them. “When we get back you tell everyone you fell by accident, understand?”
I can’t move.
“Answer me!” His scream is so loud it makes my knees give out.
“Okay,” I manage to say. “I’ll say I fell.”
He stares at me and when I dare to make eye contact with him again it’s like I’m staring at a different Eli. “I’m sorry,” the words rush out of his mouth. “Macy, I’m so sorry. Sometimes my temper gets the best of me.” He reaches for my hand, his eyes softening. “Here, let me help you. We’ll go back to the house and Jonah will clean you up.”
My head is still spinning. I blink twice, refusing to believe this is my reality, thinking I must be dreaming.
I let him take my hand. “Okay, take me home please.”
The first person I want to see when I walk through the door is Daryl. Not Jonah. I couldn’t care less about him fixing the cuts on my hand. I need to see someone familiar, I need to see someone who makes me feel safe.
Eli grabs my wrist and jerks me back before I can go find him. “Remember what I said,” he murmurs.
I nod my head. “I won’t say anything.”
With Eli on my heels, I find Daryl standing behind the island counter skinning an animal, his crossbow on the table beside him. He looks up at me and concern floods through his eyes.
“Macy, what the hell happened to you?” He drops his knife and rushes towards me.
I’m so happy to see him that I have to physically stop myself from crying.
“She fell onto some broken glass while we were scavenging a few houses down the block,” Eli explains, his voice so even you would never know he was lying.
Daryl’s eyes narrow at him. “Why the hell weren’t you watchin' out for her?” He gently wraps his hands around my waist and sets me on the counter. He looks down at my hands, and I look down too, seeing more blood than I remember the last time I looked. “Eli, go get the bandages and the antiseptic,” Daryl orders in a rough voice.
“I can just go get Jonah, he’ll kn-“
“Did I ask you to go get Jonah? Do what I told you to do, I don’t need him right now,” he snaps.
Eli disappears from the room and I breathe for what feels like the first time in days.
“How much pain you in?” Daryl questions, his pale eyes staring at the blood on my face.
I’m completely numb. I don’t feel anything. I can hardly feel his hand touching mine. “I’m okay.”
His gaze darts up at mine. “Don’t lie to me.”
“Really.” I attempt a small smile. “I’m fine.”
He shakes his head. “You’re an awful liar.”
***Things are going to start picking up now, I know it's been a little slow!!