Warning: bulimic imagery
*
The day was long and tiresome as we help Anya and some of the other Trainers settle the refuges. Seeing as they were short on space, Malakei and I helped give out sleeping bags to some while others didn't mind taking the stables to sleep with the animals. To my surprise, the elves didn't mind. I found it strange as many-if not all-would have grown up with riches and luxury, to see them willingly and happily sleep with animals in an outside stable is beyond me. I wonder how shaken up these elves must have been.
Did they see Max? Was he already in the High Peaks?
After the sleeping bags went out, there were only the select few with nothing but the clothes on their back and a few belongings they were clinging too between their grasps. I crouched down beside a small blonde boy sucking his thumb. He looked no more than five. To see how this war was affecting children broke my heart and I began to peel off my jacket that had fleece lining on the inside.
He turned to look at me, taking his thumb from his mouth as he noticed me wrapping the coat over him. I was in the process of zipping it up when his small fingers touch the side of my neck. It didn't take a genius to know what he was pointing at.
"Quid est hoc?" 'What is it?'
"Malum hominem nocere mihi."
'A bad man hurt me.' I say stiffly as I adjust the coat on the small infants body. His eyes widen into saucers when I say this.
"Quare?" He questions why someone would do such a thing. His innocence makes me smile. Making me think back to when I was his age, when I was that innocent and not yet knowing how the world works.
"Amat victoria curam."
'Victory favours those who take pain.' I mutter as I fix his collar, contemplating the phrase commonly spoken by elves regarding many things. He suddenly chuckles at my words and I raise a brow at him while he shows me a toothless smile.
"Amantes sunt amentes." He sighs and my eyes blink in surprise as I stare at him. I was just about to speak when he is being pulled out from my grip by what I could only assume is his mother. She notices the jacket around her son and her eyes begin to water as she gushed her thanks to me. I nod at her, assuring her with a smile before explaining the situation regarding the lack of sleeping bags. The little boy swings out of his mother absentmindedly and she looks exhausted as she tries to figure out what to do.
"Madam?" I question and she turns to me, ears twitching as she brushes her hair back behind them.
"If you are not afraid of animals.." I begin unsure but smile at her hopeful look as she scoops up her son in her arms. I notice his eyes grow wide in nervous excitement as he watches Baja stroll up beside me before brushing against my leg. She was hungry, I didn't blame her, I was too. I knew I couldn't stop and rest until these people were looked after. I smile at the little boy and the mother who didn't seem at all put off by the panther.
"There might be a place for you both to sleep for a few nights until we can find a room."
—
"So I saw a little blonde boy running around with your jacket.."
Malakei trails off and I look up from my daze to see that he was smiling down at me with an unknown emotion in his eyes. Anya makes a noise of recognition from my other side as we walk.
"That was a jacket? I thought it was a dress. My bad." She chuckles and I shove her in her step to which she chuckles harder.
"It was a jacket idiot, you should get your eyes checked." I raise a brow at her mockingly and she rolls her eyes at me. I couldn't help but find a genuine smile underneath her scowl but I didn't think on it. Malakei had the same expression on his face as he looked at me and that's when I finally had enough.
"Stop looking at me like that, both of you."
"I'm not saying anything!" They both say in sync before turning to look at each other with a knowing look. I yelp and run forward away from them. They only laugh at this as I make my way up to the main building, bursting through the doors and jogging to the dining room.
The minute I open the doors however I freeze as my eyes lock onto my grandfather in the dining room. Sitting down and using his time to divulge in a book.
My heart increases at the sight of him sitting there and I immediately make my way over to him, a smile on my face as I do so.
"Grandfather?" I question and at my voice he immediately looks up from his book hopeful. When his eyes spot me, they begin to well up and he closes his book getting up from the table and outstretching his arms for me. He chuckles as I run into his awaiting arms and I bury my face into his chest. Missing him, he reminded me of home and my old life that my heart longed to be with him.
"Keylin.." He speaks. His voice filled with joy as he hugs me. "You have grown so much since I last saw you. How are you doing?"
He has aged in the last few years which is no surprise, he was verging on the later stars of his life but still. His health was pristine but decreasing.
"I'm ok." I breath out. "What about you? What are you doing here?" I question in excitement as I pull back to look at him. He smiles at me and ruffles my hair jokingly.
"I'm here with a few of my people. We are looking for sanctuary from the storm that is raging over the High Peaks." He states with a grim look and I frown at this.
"Storm?" I question and he nods.
There was no such thing as a storm ever occurring over the High Peaks. The weather was always mild and clammy. There was no coincidence that Max and his twisted powers had something to do with this. Which made me come to the truthful realisation that he was indeed getting closer and we were running out of time.
"Kova is a good friend of mine." My grandfather brings me out of my thoughts. "He is allowing my elves to stay with him until the storm blows over and we can return to our native land."
"That's...nice of him." I state.
The same Kova that sentenced me to death for crossing sectors? I was surprised. Then again, the trading with my grandfather and the Gods had been alive for generations upon generations along with their friendship. Kova would have known that I was his best friend's grandson surely. I knew Kova didn't like me but...this was all a bit strange. I couldn't make sense of it all.
Malakei and Anya make their way through the dining room doors and I turn around to their chattering forms. Their eyes find me but Malakei is the first to stop in his tracks the minute he sees my grandfather.
"It's alright Malakei." I assure him and my grandfather hums from behind me. I turn around and notice the frown my grandfather is sporting as he looks at the Dry Lander with weariness and discomfort.
I can understand what he's feeling. I was taken from him by none other than the Dry Landers in the night. Houses were burned to the ground and children my age were slaughtered. That was a night many would never forget.
I shivered at the thought and looked with determination up at my grandfather.
"He won't hurt me or you. I trust him. He's my friend."
My grandfather sighs as he looks at me and I feel Malakei make his way up from behind me. Staying at a reasonable distance. My grandfather eventually smiles down at me.
"Well then. I suppose I have a lot of catching up to do. Come, let us all sit down and have dinner. You must be famished."
—
It was a few hours later that we didn't even realise had passed by and we were still all sitting down in the same seats we had took up. Anya, Bow my grandfather and I were laughing. Talking about the events that had happened in our lives. We were catching up.
It was all peaceful but we knew it had to be ruined at some point or another. It wasn't long until someone bursts through the doors of the dining room making us all turn in the direction startled.
My eyes fell upon my father, brother and Raen. All wearing the emotionless hard features a Dry Lander possesses but when I looked at my father, a look full of malice and hate was lingering on his face as he zeroed in on our table, staring at my grandfather.
"What the fuck is he doing here?" My father rages loudly as he makes way over to our table. My grandfather grits his teeth and stands up. All I could do was run my hand over my face tiredly as I knew a screaming match was about to begin between them.
"I have a right to be here, unlike you filthy rats." My grandfather's voice is strong, powerful. I turn my head around and my father's eyes narrow into slits. Bow steps forward, but instead of stopping the quarrel, he squares his shoulders at my grandfather almost threateningly.
"Don't you dare call us rats. We are strong warriors unlike you cowards that hide behind Gods when a storm hits the homeland-"
"How dare you speak to me like that child. Know your place! You should be locked in the dungeons for-"
"Stop it!" I yell at them, pushing up from the table. Their eyes immediately fly to me in stunned silence but they glance at my grandfather and glare as does my grandfather. I ball my hands into fists and glare at them.
"Can all of you just stop yelling? I understand you have your differences but it's time to put them aside-"
My father grunts in displeasure and turns to me with a tight expression.
"I will never forgive him. He kept you from me for so many years and continues to treat me as the criminal."
"That's because you are!" My grandfather roars angrily, bringing a finger up to point at my father's chest. "You tricked my daughter into thinking that she was in love with you-"
"She was." My father insists, an emotion waking in his eyes at the mention of my mother. "We both were."
My grandfather looks at him in silence and no one says anything. I can feel eyes on me but I don't look in their direction, knowing that Raen was the one looking at me.
"As soon as the storm clears.." My grandfather takes in a breath. "I'm taking my grandson back to the High Peaks, where he belongs-"
My eyes widen as I turn to my grandfather but he doesn't look at me. He continues to stare at my father, watching as his face crumbles at his words. My father's face then goes rigid and filled with fury as he leans closer to the elf.
"He belongs with me. With his family in the Dry Lands-"
"I am more family to him than you ever were! You were never there! You only want him now because he is older and capable of raising your goddamn army of savages! I raised him! He is more my boy than yours-"
"No." I state lowly and I didn't need to raise my voice for them to hear me. My input was vital to them surprisingly and they all looked at me.
"I'm not going anywhere. For now, I'm staying here. This is not about us anymore. Not about what's best for me. There are people, not just elves but Dry Landers, simple travellers from the Wet Divide-they are travelling here because they are looking for shelter and not just from some storm..."
I look at both of them. Here goes everything.
"We are in the middle of a war whether you want to believe it or not. The only place that is reasonably safe anymore is here but in time, the Sky Lanes will be at the hands and mercy of the Shadow prince."
There is silence as Bow nods at me in understanding. Seeing the bigger picture. Malakei and my father do the same as Anya stares at me with a frown. My grandfather suddenly lets out a comical laugh.
"There is no war Keylin." He frowns at me, amusement playing in his eyes. "The storm is strange yes but a war? Impossible."
"It is true." My father says seriously as he looks to my grandfather with a little less anger.
"I have faced them. My warriors have faced them, even Keylin has faced them. Staring straight in the face of Maximus Sarcovnia himself."
"You lie!" My grandfather seethes, his worrying face turning to me. "They have brainwashed you Keylin. They are putting these thoughts in your head! There is no war!"
"Why are you here?" I suddenly question as I frown at the ground before looking at him. He sighs tiredly and goes to speak but I don't let him and continue.
"We spent our day making sure that your elves had somewhere to sleep tonight and food in their stomachs. Where were you? Why were you not with them?" I question as my eyebrows knit together in disappointment the longer my grandfather stays in silence.
He was inside, in the warmth reading his God damn book while his elves suffered and shivered with the cold.
In the end I turned away from him, not able to look at him anymore as I began to leave.
"Until you both can talk to one another without wanting to tear each other apart, don't attempt to talk to me." I mutter angrily as I brush past them, heading towards the dining room doors and ignoring their calls of protest.
—
The next few days go by rather quickly. I insisted on spending my days helping with the refuges and making sure they were settled and had enough to eat for the day.
Every morning when I arrived at the gates of the Sky Lanes, my heart would drop when I saw more and more people from far and wide looking for shelter. It was getting worse now. People were turning to the Sky Lanes because they deemed it the only option available that was safe now. Just by listening to folk and their stories about the horrors they've seen, I could tell that Max's army of the dead were growing in numbers and the lands were being overrun by the so called creatures.
I thought of that night in my dream. Max had appeared but not since then. I have never told a soul about my dream, I wasn't even sure if it was important. I didn't understand what or why he even reached out to me.
One thing for sure though was that he was still searching for the one with the mark. It wasn't me and although it made me relieved, I still worried for the unlucky boy that bears it. Until Max finds him, we still had time to get things together. I was hoping to form an army but without the strength of the Gods, it is useless.
I thought about seeking out the boy with the mark but it would be useless also. Max would most likely find him before I did or maybe find him through me. Either way we were in no position to start anything. All we could do was take in the refuges and hope that we weren't fuelling a trap for the Shadow prince's advantage.
Another week or so later, I was called to the stand before the Gods. Knowing that I was either going to be killed or exiled for slipping the information about a war, I didn't really care at this stage. I didn't really care about anything. Even the thoughts of dying didn't phase me. It never did. Maybe it was due to the fact we were all going to die eventually whether that be from old age or in battle.
One thing was for sure that when Max succeeds, no one would live to see his new world unless we were brought in to it as slaves.
I rather die free than live the rest of my life as a slave to evil.
As I made my way down the hallway, I met the guard's at the large doors of the room that I knew I was supposed to be in. They didn't hesitate in pulling them open for me to step inside and I quickly walked through. Only when I looked up, I was surprised to see the three Gods sat on their thrones like always and my father and grandfather in the center. I gulped as they all looked at me frozen at the entrance.
"Come in Keylin. It is important that you are here."
Kova calls out to me and I shake myself of my frozen state before moving into the room. My eyes trail to the side near the window of the large room and I spot Anya, Bow, Malakei and Raen all in that order standing in align. I move and stand beside Anya, throwing her a confused glance before looking out at my family with a concerned brow.
"What's going on?" I whisper ahead and Anya doesn't move her head to look at me as she answers quietly.
"They both want custody of you."
"This is ridiculous." I mutter angrily. "The God's won't let me leave. Their attempts are useless."
She doesn't say anything and her silence frightens me. I feel as though she knows something I shouldn't. Maybe it was obvious. My grandfather was good friends with Kova, he would certainly use this to his advantage in getting what he wants. I turn to her with concern and I feel her eyes glance at me.
"Do something." I whisper almost in plead and she turns to me at this. Face frowning in confusion.
"Like what?" She questions and I turn back to look at my grandfather and father arguing in front of the Gods. Stomach turning in fear of having to leave again.
"Anything." I state in plead before taking a breath. "I can't leave yet."
From the corner of my eye I see Anya nod once in understanding. Several moments go by before she steps forward. Eyes wide, I follow her.
"You are all being childish!" She states loudly and everyone halts in their speech to look at her in irritation. Victoria stands from her throne and glares at her daughter.
"Anya! Your input is not welcomed!"
"Of course it is mother! When it means taking Keylin away from the Sky Lanes, Of course I have an input!" She says sternly back and I blink in shock at her talking back to her mother, a God.
Derik raises a brow at her in amusement as Victoria looks like she wants to skin her daughter for disgracing her in front of us.
"And what input is that hmm?" Kova questions calmly as he looks at Anya with interest.
"What could you possibly say that would change our views?"
Victoria stares at her grandfather for a fleeting moment, I watch her as she slowly turns around to me, aware of everyone looking at us now in wonder of what we were going to do next. Her eyes fake adoration and she holds a hand out for me to take. Knowing exactly where she was going despite wanting to vomit;
I take her hand. Moving up to fall in line with her, I watch her calmly.
"Keylin and I are in love."
She says softly and the gasps around the room echo. My father has a mixture of emotions on his face while my grandfather looks more irritated than anything at the odds not being in his favour. I smile brightly and turn to the Gods.
"You cannot separate us grandfather. Our love is eternal. I am bound to him as he is bound to me. I feel he is my soul mate."
Anya babbles on about our fake love to the Gods. Throwing in something relating to Trainers having a certain bond greater than any normal love. It was brilliant and they were buying it. I could see the chances of me staying here increase in their eyes and it made me smile even more.
"I have been teaching him to train the dragons. Soon he will be able to ride one-"
I blink in surprise at this but hold it back as I watch my father look at me with an intense gaze. When he looked at me, it's as if he was putting everything on hold. I could tell this was important to him. This is the first he's ever heard of me falling in love with someone. He has never known about Raen.
A sting in my heart occurs as I think about him. The pain and memories of over two weeks ago settling in. He hasn't reached out to me since. That hurt more than anything.
"Is this true Keylin?" I look up over at my father's face, noticing the warmth and delight spreading for me. He was happy for me.
"I love her with all of my heart." I state, squeezing her hand and turning to look into the eyes of pure cold evil.
"She means everything to me. I didn't realise it until now when it means being away from her. It would tear me apart. I can't see myself living my life without her beside me."
"Let him stay." Victoria was the one to speak. Voice full of emotion as she brings a hand up to wipe a stray tear falling onto her cheek.
"He is good for my daughter. I approve."
"I will not deal with the moping heart ache from my niece if he leaves the Sky Lanes so I also approve, he stays." Derik states and I look over at them, eyes finding Kova to see he was scrutinising us from the begin, looking for a flaw.
I don't give him one as I bring a hand around Anya's waist, pulling her gently to me. She lets her head fall on my chest, hand around my shoulder protectively as she looks up at her grandfather. I had to admit, she was good at acting. I was alright but she was really selling us.
"Very well." Kova clears his throat. "He stays."
There was no cheering, no congratulations. The Gods were the first to leave, Victoria throwing me a smile at which I returned. My grandfather followed Kova whilst my father came up to me. I stiffened in fear of what he might say but he surprises me by taking me in his arms.
"I'm so proud of you." He says into my hair before pulling back and turning to Anya with a sparkle in his eyes.
"I'm sorry we have not properly met. I am Maekin. Keylin's father." He takes her hand in his and clasps his other hand over hers warmly. I can tell Anya wants nothing more than to run to the bathroom and wash her hands until the flesh is rubbed red raw.
She smiles at him through her pain.
"Anya, Victoria's daughter. It is lovely to officially meet you."
Bow comes up to my father's side and I can tell he looks slightly frustrated. I know this because he refuses to look at me, only having eyes for Anya. I wanted to smack him upside the head for looking at her like he was a kicked dog but I don't have the chance as they wish us good luck and promised of meeting us for dinner later.
We wave goodbye to them and I look behind me. My face dropping as I see that Raen had disappeared. Malakei remained, his eyes fixed to the floor as he folded his arms across his chest.
He takes in a breath as Anya turns around to him and looks up at us. Confusion and sadness evident in his features and I frown at this.
"So...when were you going to tell me that you two.." He trails off biting his lip before clearing his throat, his face turning to the side.
Anya and I both look down at our still conjoined hands, not spending another second together as we rubbed our free hands on our attires in repulsion. Malakei looks at us confused.
"Break my hand next time why don't you."
Anya grits out as she massages her hand from where I had squeezed maybe a little too harshly.
"Maybe I will." I smirk and she narrows her eyes at me.
"Hold on." Malakei says softly and we both turn to him to see he was biting his lip to hide his smile.
"I truly hope you're not that daft into thinking I would ever love this asshole?" Anya points to me in reference and I frown at her.
"And I also hope that you know me well enough in understanding that this vile creature could never be my type?" I question sarcastically as I raise a brow at Malakei.
"We needed to make up some excuse to keep me in the Sky Lanes. I can't afford to leave now." I explain softly.
Malakei finally looks at me. Eyes smiling before he is shaking his head at me fondly and bringing me into a headlock.
"You're dead." Malakei chuckles as I squirm and try to get out of his grip. Anya had already excused herself to the bathroom to scrub her hands.
"You need to explain to Raen." Malakei pants out as he releases me from the headlock. I regain my breathing but the mention of him makes me frown as I look up at Malakei.
"He won't talk to me. Not since that night." I state the last part quietly and Malakei frowns in concern before shaking his head. Irritation on his face.
"Fuck him then. He doesn't deserve you. If he can't take a joke then it's his loss."
"He.." I begin but bite my lip. I look up at Malakei in fright and self consciously rub at my elbow.
"He saw my scars and I guess he didn't like what he saw."
Malakei says nothing as he looks at me. Eyes unreadable as he takes in what I just told him. The pain he held in his eyes for me, I couldn't look at him.
"Like I said." Malakei gulps as he slings an arm over my shoulder, pulling me in for a side hug as we begin to walk to the doors of the room. I look up and see him smiling down at me knowingly.
"He doesn't deserve you."
—
Raen wasn't in the dining room for dinner with the rest of the Dry Landers. I sat with Anya. Malakei on my other side and my father in front. Bow was sitting beside him eating silently.
I ate a third of my food before excusing myself to the bathroom, feeling the familiar nauseous feeling build in my stomach. I kneel down over the toilet bowl and wretch into it.
When I'm finished, I was completely drained. I flushed the toilet and made my way to the sink where I started by washing my hands, face and mouth. My hands held the sides of the sink in front of me as I took in even breaths to calm myself down.
"Calm down.." I whisper out. "You just overloaded your stomach. Meal by meal Keylin." I assure myself but in reality I knew my eating habits were not the case. It had nothing to do with building my strength.
I was letting Raen affect me to the point when I thought about him, I wanted to puke my guts up. Was it fear? Anxiety?
I left the bathroom before leaving the dining room entirely. Not in the mood to finish my plate of food as I knew I couldn't finish it. I went to my room. Not Malakei's this time, I wanted to be alone. I curled up under the covers of the bed and tried to steady my breathing so that I could just fall asleep and be done with the day.
Unfortunately, I was awoken by the sound of boots and grumbling in the pitch black room, indicating that it was well past midnight.
I tiredly reached over to the bedside and turned on the lamp, squinting at the brightness the light illuminated. When my eyes adjusted, I noticed a figure hunched over in the corner of the room. I watched with wide eyes as he stumbled, taking his boots off.
It was Raen.
Raen placed a hand on the wall as he grumbled before stumbling away from it having finally gotten his boots off. He caught my eye and smiled at me as he walked forward, stumbling sideways in his walk and clipping his hip off of the desk. He grumbles out a curse word. Saying something about minding its own business. My stomach dropped.
He was drunk.
"What are you doing here?" I question tiredly and slightly irritated as he made a mess of my room. I let my head fall into my hands as I sighed, massaging my temples as a headache started to form.
I feel him hover above me but I don't look up. This makes him whine my name and I blink in surprise.
"Keylin.." He whines again as his hands lazily go around my hands, pulling them away from my face. I frown up at him. Frustration setting into my tired eyes.
"What?" I ask him, voice clipped and he frowns down at me, bringing his hand up from where it was originally holding my hand and placed it on my cheek. Wiping away the invisible tear under my eye. My eyebrows scrunch in confusion.
"Don't cry. I hate it when you cry. I always make you cry and it makes me feel terrible."
Good. I hope you feel terrible about making me cry.
"I'm not crying." I grumble out before pushing his hands away and getting back into bed, turning my back to him.
"Get out Raen."
I hear him shuffling before the sheets are being moved from around me. I turn to look at him irritated only to scoff when I see him climbing into the bed beside me.
"This is not what I mean by get out. The door is over there." I grumble and Raen scrunches his brows in concentration, looking around the room.
"Where?" He questions and I shut my eyes.
Why me?
"Straight ahead now get out."
"Don't be mad." He frowns and I feel his hands begin to move towards me. Before he can touch me however, I push him away. Straight off the bed and onto the floor.
There's a thud before he is groaning in pain, I sit up and reach for the lamp again. Turning it on and squinting at its brightness.
"You're such an idiot." I scold him in whisper as I narrow my eyes down at him.
He looks up at me with tear filled eyes as he massages his arm. I'm about to speak when he suddenly beats me to it.
"Why don't you love me?" He questions sadly.
"I love you so much Keylin. Sooooo much but ever since I got here you haven't spent any time with me. It's Malakei Malakei Malakei and that other girl Anna with the scary hair. I don't like her hair. I don't like her stupid pretty eyes and I hate her because you love her and not me."
He holds himself together as he confesses to me in his drunken state. I figured I've heard enough. If I let him, he would probably talk for the rest of the night and I was tired. I sigh tiredly as I move to get out of bed, helping Raen up to his feet.
"Come on, you can't sleep here. If you wake up here tomorrow you'll probably do something you'll regret. Where have you been staying recently?"
As I manage to get Raen to his feet with no help from him of course, I begin to walk with him to the door. His hand over my shoulder as I try and hold him up. He suddenly shakes his head and sloppily kisses me on the cheek.
I close my eyes and greedily take in the moment. Knowing that it will be gone. Knowing that this would be the last time he will probably be kissing me because the real, sober Raen hates every part of me now.
"Key..I'm sorry." He mumbles into my cheek and I can't help but scrunch my face up in pain. Eyes beginning to sting but I let out a small laugh. Opening my tear stricken eyes and turn to him.
"It's too late for that. Besides, you're drunk."
"This." He points to himself lazily. "Is not me drunk. I am still here. I didn't even have that much."
"Ok Raen." I chuckle sadly and begin to walk forward again but he refuses to budge. I sigh tiredly and turn to him.
"I remember...I wanted to talk to you."
"Talk to me in the morning, it's late."
"No..it has to be tonight. I can say what I want when I'm like this." His hand around my shoulder suddenly moves up my neck and he's tangling his fingers through the small hairs at the bottom of my neck, his lips crashing down onto mine.
The taste of alcohol was bitter on my lips but I ignored it as I feel his hands trap me in his embrace.
He pulls back and I can see him swaying, before I have the chance to steady him he is falling against me. My feet slip from under me and I fall backwards. Clutching onto him with a shriek as he stumbles over me. One hand going around my back and the other held in front of him in an attempt to shield my body from damage as we go down.
My back collides with the side of the bed and I groan in pain, clamping my eyes shut. Raen's hand is just planted over my shoulder onto the bed, preventing himself from crushing me with his weight and his other hand around my back is strongly pulling me towards him. His body heat radiating from his quickly rising and falling chest. I didn't realise my hands had vined their way around the back of his neck in fear of falling. Apart from the impression the side of the bed had made on my back. I was alive.
"Shit." Raen mumbles in concern before dropping his hands from around my back, in turn making me fall to the ground in a sitting position.
"Ow." I wince and this makes his eyes widen in fear.
"Shit!" He's quickly helping me up and instructing me to sit on the bed but the pain around my shoulders is dull and I end up lying back on the bed, closing my eyes and breathing through my nose.
"Keylin? Are you alive?" He questions hovering over me and I snort at this. Opening my eyes to look up at his concerned ones. Noticing how close he was.
"I'm so sorry Keylin. I didn't mean to hurt you."
I bit my tongue at the sarcastic remark I was going to make but decided against it. I just wanted him to stop already.
"It's fine." I sigh closing my eyes and bringing my hands up to run over my face. "I'm fine. Just put on a shirt so we can go."
He doesn't respond straight away and instead, his eyes catch the bottom of my shirt that had somehow rilled up. He takes it in his fingers and stares at it. I try and sit up alert now, afraid of a repeat of last time. Afraid that in his state he might say something that will break me altogether. I can't face him denying me a second time. I already knew how ugly I was.
"Can I see them again?" He looks up at me with glassy eyes and I don't know how to respond. I didn't want him looking at them ever again but the look in his eyes...I found myself nodding slowly and lying back down on the bed.
He turns back to my shirt and begins to slowly peel the material upwards, carefully. As if the scars still hurt my body with the slightest of movement. They were healing now. I was healing I guess.
He stopped pulling the shirt and held it above my chest. I took it from his hand and I held it there, meeting his eyes momentarily and in that moment, I swore I saw pity.
He looked over my body, his hands tentatively moving over each of them. I froze however when I felt something wet fall onto my stomach and looked down my body at Raen to see where the wet substance was coming from. It was him.
He was crying.
I begin to pull down my shirt. Already knowing that he spent too long looking at them. The pain in my chest hurt at the sight of his tears but I couldn't do anything to stop them. Only prevent him from looking any longer.
"Wait-" He whimpers and catches my hand. I look at him with a raised brow but he only looks at me blankly.
"I-I forgot what I wanted to say." He whispers and I sigh.
"It's alright-"
"-But I knew it was something along the lines of this..." He says seriously. Eyes full of adoration as he looks down at my scars and discolouration.
My eyes widen as I watch him move his head closer to my stomach, his eyes trained on a particular gash above my belly button before he is guiding his lips over the mark, kissing it.
"W-What?" I question, slightly breathless as I watch him. His lips come away from my inflicted skin but his head continues to hover over my stomach. He looks up at my glazed eyes and smiles an adoring smile. His eyes full of emotion and truth.
"I love you Keylin. I love all of you and that includes your marks and bruises. I was shocked when you showed me and I felt pain. Pain for you and me but I don't want to fight anymore. I'm sorry. I'm selfish because I want you to myself. I realise now that includes your marks and pain." He looks down at a discoloured bruise before hovering his lips over it.
"I want to take your pain away. I love you Keylin. More than anything." I suck in a breath at the feel of his lips on my skin. Looking at him as he moves onto the next scar and the next bruise.
"You don't have to do this Raen." I whisper out to him and he looks up at me. I bite my lip as I look down at him with soft features. "You've already made your point. You can stop."
With a frown at my suggestion, he makes his way in between my legs where he kneels on the ground beside the bed, wielding his hands under my arms to curl over my shoulders as he pulls my body down closer to him as a response to my statement.
I gulp as I rest both elbows behind me, giving elevation as I look down at him. He smirks up at me before trailing butterfly kisses along a jagged slit along my ribs. I bite back my lip and let my eyes fall closed. Only when he bites down on a particular bruise below my nipple I let my mouth fall open and my head roll back. My arms trembling from holding my body up.
"When you think of your scars and bruises, don't think of the bad. Think of the good. Think of right now." Raen whispers into my chest, bringing his hands over my ribs before kissing my chest.
I let out a strangled breath as I finally give in to my trembling arms, allowing my back to fall onto the bed. Raen looks down at me and smiles. I can't help but bite my lip as I bring my hand up to caress his cheek.
"Thank you." I whisper up at him, tears sliding from my eyes. Raen wipes them away fondly.
"Don't thank me. I should have done this the moment I laid eyes on them." He whispers before diving down to capture my lips in a slow and gentle kiss.
**
Hey guys! Sorry for the long wait, because of my schedule the only time I can actually have time to update is either on a Thursday or Friday😭
I've also got a lot of exams coming up which doesn't help as most of my free time will be dedicated to studying and doing well in the tests.
I may not have mentioned it also but I travel to college by bus so I get up at 6:30 every morning and don't get home until nearly 7 that evening (except Thursdays I'm finished at 11 and get home at around 2:30pm)
I hope you enjoyed the update though! It's over 7000 words to make up for the long ass wait😂❤️
Emma x