I felt better. I wish I could say I was dead heartbroken and as blank as a ghost could be but I felt a little more alive than I was before. It was a relief of finally having a nice talk with Taylor, without her crying, without me wanting to be angry, without the questions. . . just without us.
The midnight thing still struck me but I found it easier to walk around in the dark place, playing with toys every once in a while. It went on for days but I couldn't worry.
The family dinner was a bit more enlightening than I expected seeing as there were children around joining us. They lit up the place for their parents, joking and telling stories.
"There was one time when Uncle Franco taught us how to climb that highest room in the third floor! He taught us how to climb through the barriers!" Vincent Brent said, causing the kids to laugh and the adults to turn their head on him and smile.
"I did not!" Franco yelled and I knew it was a lie as I was there with them that time. It was during last Valentine's Day and we both agreed to be babysitters for a few hours. And well, I was the one that did most of the teaching.
There I sat hoping they won't drag my name in the pot as Vienne is already glaring at Franco.
"Co, you might be older but you have got to get your own children to teach these things!" Vienne said yet her voice was light.
"Yeah, Co, get your own kids," Darwin teased as if he has them when really, he's at the same page as me and Franco.
"Uncle Harry helped teach us too!" Jericho said, laughing later as he saw my reaction.
"You too, get your own," Vienne said, faking a glare and successfully making me laugh at that one.
"He laughs! Oh I thought the day would never come," Quentin said. Something might have changed because I've never heard him joke, much less talk.
"He talks! Oh I thought thought the day would never come," Franco retorted to him and there were rounds of laughter. As Franco was right beside me, he winked, saying "Told you it'd be fun."
If I had known I would have came earlier. It was fun.
William started asking about how our lives are going and then the conversation split itself apart into groups. I observed first and strangely, they were really talking. William is talking with Grace and Quentin. Gemma is preoccupied with the kids and so was Darwin. Franco is talking with the kids as well. Vienne is right in front of me. . .
"Still never got one of your own, huh?" Vienne asked, taking a sip from her red wine and her eyes glancing at her children.
"I probably do, their mums just don't introduce them to me," I said, and honestly, I wanted to take back what I said. Nope. No freaking way.
She smirked, and I saw myself being a woman and smirking. God, I do look like my sister. I never even stared for too long. "I pray that's not the case with you. Have any girlfriends?"
"Not since the last one, unfortunately," I replied as she set down her glass.
"Oh yeah. Her." I don't think she even remembers.
I raised an eyebrow, surprised I'm even entertained by this conversation. "You don't remember her."
"Course I don't," she said so immediately. "The last girlfriend I remember you have was uh - I don't really recall the name but starts with a 'T.' The sweet one, gave my boys cute presents."
"That was my last girlfriend," I pointed out, smiling right after. She caught me with that "sweet" part, that was Taylor.
Vienne blinked, seemingly unable to understand that I really meant what I said until Franco butted in. "Yep, last girlfriend was sunshine, Taylor. Pretty, would have wanted to date her but unfortunately, became Harry's."
Liar. I was pretty sure he was never interested in Taylor. If he was, they could be together by now.
"Next subject," I muttered. "I got a girlfriend, we broke up, let's move on."
"Alright then," Vienne said, drinking from her glass of wine again. What's strange is when I look at her, she doesn't even look like a mother, she was beautiful and I can't even believe she's my sister.
"Vienne," Grace, from the other side of the table asked so right then Vienne's attention was to them so I started talking with the five year-old Alexandra Styles, Quentin's daughter. Apparently, she's just as much addicted to marshmallows as Tori though Quentin told me not to give her too much because it makes her too hyper.
I don't recall the major changes in this family but it was different, it seemed like we get along well. Of course, they are the worst in family dinners, it sort of changed. That or I wasn't really observing these past few times.
By the end of dinner, it became a sudden disaster. Eight players for monopoly, half are kids and half are real-life businessmen. For the children, it's Alexandra, Vincent, Denny and Andrew. Two of them are William's so the chances of his bloodline winning are a bit better than the rest. For the adults are Grace, Franco, Darwin and Vienne.
It was unbelievable how we're all huddled up in circles, the eight playing all around the monopoly board and the rest are simply watching. I sat on the couch right behind Franco and Denny to see if either of them were cheating. Franco won't. I know he won't because he takes pride in being the best businessman. Though it's hard to convince him that monopoly isn't like the actual business. . .
"Hey, why did Auntie Grace get to turn again?" Denny whined.
"Because she got doubles, you dimwit," Darwin replied.
"Call my son dimwit again, dimwit," William warned but seemed to be joking.
Denny took his turn after Grace and so the game continued.
It was ages later when they started arguing because some of the adults refuse to pay the rent because they have their reasons like the kids forgot or the other player already rolled their dice. Whichever.
"Why in the bloody hell would I want to sell you my Get-out-of-jail-free card? Get your own," Franco muttered as Denny Styles kept whining on him to sell it to him.
"You can have my Liverpool station," Denny offered. Franco was about to reply when William coached his son not to sell it to Franco.
"Fine. Your loss," said Franco.
The game didn't end as most of us were desperate to just sleep. Franco decided to stay in whereas I wanted to really have a quiet night. I said goodbye to them all, promised more marshmallows, and promised to teach them how to fix toys next time. Then I drove home.
Weary and dead sleepy, I sunk on my bed and surprisingly slept exceedingly well. The next day was a Sunday so I got to wind down and walk around the streets of the city. I felt very contented about my life as I walked through the sidewalks. To think of it, my family's alright, pasts are fixed and I've got nothing else to look forward to in the future.
Pigeons ran out of the way when I walked pass them. After a fountain and a couple of preoccupied benches, my feet finally led me to the side of the fountain. Cars passed by, people did as well and I sat there, listening to the noises around me.
A coin is flipped over my head, making a few droplets splash on me and as if on instinct, my head glanced at the direction where the coin was from. . . just a girl, bit on the early twenties, probably.
"Sorry, did it hit you?" She asked, sounding quite concerned.
I shook my head no and gave a thumbs up to tell her it's fine. I was too busy watching the sceneries to mind anyways. "You wished, didn't you?" I asked to lighten up the mood from her concerned eyes. She had her hair in a bun, dark as her eyes were yet she was standing tall in a fine demeanour.
"Yeah," she answered gloomily. "For my friend, she's uh, sort of in a hospital."
I nodded and she walked on right ahead to the fountain whose side I was sitting on. She took a glance at her coin, pursed her lips then sat beside me. "What about you, wished for anything?" She asked.
I shook my head. "Got nothing else to wish for."
"Hmm, you must feel really content about your life," she commented and yes, as a matter of fact, I was. I nodded to say I agree with her and then she continued, "I am as well, only my best friend's sort of in a rough patch."
"How rough?" I asked mindlessly, quite unsure if I was listening or not.
She sighed dramatically, "Quite rough. So if you're not here for a wish, what are you doing in this bit of the street?"
"Not much, really. I just fancied a walk," I replied casually.
"I fancied a walk as well, only that led me to this fountain and I figured a wish wouldn't hurt," she told me, continuing with her storytelling mode. "My father once told me that those who fancy walks are searching for something. You sure you aren't searching for anything?" She asked.
Somehow, the mood of the conversation was too light to ignore so I didn't feel like shutting it off. "I don't think so."
"What if you are?" She asked, looking back to the coin she tossed over my head and then started rummaging through her purse.
"Then I'll hope I find whatever it is I'm looking for," I replied though I'm quite certain I'm not looking for anything.
"I hope you do as well."
I wondered for a brief moment why she was interested in a small talk with a stranger but then I thought, she might be needing it at the moment. I was content with how my life was going and there's really nothing I could ask for.
I let it pass when it occurred to me that she might be needing some company and I've got nothing else to do so I thought it wouldn't be too bad if I stayed for a moment.
"Why do you think things happen?" She asked all of a sudden. I would suppose she could have asked my name first but me being a stranger might have slipped her notice.
"I'm not that fond of philosophy," I replied, thinking about life and what it is, it's simply confusing. "Things happen, that's just the way it is."
"Sometimes it could be unfair, though," she said, looking at a distance and somehow she seemed like she was in a different world. "My friend, she's one of the kindest people in the world, great relationship with her boyfriend, all seemed to be happy with her."
"But?" I asked, because things that sound too perfect cannot end that way. Things have to change.
"But, fate played with her one too much," she continued. "I wouldn't bother you about it, quite a sketchy story. That little baby doll's got a bit of a harsh problem. She's in America, though. She's American."
That's a rather odd way of describing her friend but then, what do I know about her life?
Then she mentioned American and I remembered Taylor. It almost made me smile, the struggle of keeping a straight face when I think of her seems slightly impossible but I did it anyways. I can't be stuck smiling like an idiot.
"What are you doing here, then?" I asked.
She shrugged, her shoulders coming up a bit along with a pout on her lips. "Law school. I might come back there, when she feels better."
"Why? Don't you want to be with your friend?"
"Try talking to an asleep person and that's how it feels like, panda." Did she just call me 'panda'? "I text her a lot, I'm still there with her because I leave her things. That's how it works. To let someone know that you're always with them, you give them things."
I can agree with that. "Mhmm."
"You know everyday, her boyfriend leaves her roses. Another friend of mine leaves her messages the same way I do, that way, she'll know that when we're gone, we're still with her."
That's sweet. That girl is somehow quite lucky to have friends and a boyfriend like that.
I started thinking of my dad. He left me Ensorcel and all his journals and the only thing I did was to leave them all in America. I know in his letter, he said something about it as well though I didn't pay attention. Dad left me something to let me know that he'll always be with me. . . and I just left it!
I blinked, realising I've been staring off in a distance for a while. I need to go back. I should go back. It is the last thing my dad gave to me. I have to go back.
"Oh well, I need to go. I've a class later," she said, standing up with a sigh. She showed me a silver coin and tossed one to the fountain. "I wished you find what you are looking for."
"Thanks," I said, quite gratefully.
"Good luck on your life." She turned her back to me and right then I knew she was going to walk out.
"What's your name?" I asked as she was slowly traipsing her way. I didn't ask her name because I thought she was pretty, I asked because I knew she'd been nice and at the very least, I deserved to know her name.
"Pressman," she answered. "Madelaine." And then she walked off, never bothering to turn her head back.
Whereas I. . . I have somewhere else to go as well.
Once I was back to the flat, I made my way to my desk. I have to read his letter. I need to understand it. . ., unlike the first time I've read it.
To my youngest son, Harry,
I deeply regret that I was not there to see you graduate, that I was never there. If there is one regret I have, is that I never did had time for my youngest. It made you feel different, distant even and I understand if you are angry with me.
I left you Ensorcel for one reason and one reason only, for you to experience the same magic it gave me when my father gave it to me. It may not have the wealthiest investment in all of my properties, but it has the best treasure, all the world's memories.
Including mine.
His journals, I thought to myself.
Sadly, I never got to make memorable ones with you. I am sorry but I do hope you'll make it upon yourself to make memorable memories on your own. That place has a magic I could never explain, take care of it however you want. I ask you never to abandon it because apart from the world's memories, what I have there is mine as well.
I love you, son. . .
I never said that enough,
I never did as well. . . We're on the same page at that. Partly smiling, I continued reading. . .
but here is what I can tell you: say that to the ones you know deserves it, and never leave them as I will never leave you. I'll be with you in life with every word along the way.
Saying it is not the end,
James
I slowly read it again and again until my chest felt heavy, my throat felt blocked and my eyes felt burning. . . I licked my lips after I read it for the third time. I sighed, hearing my heart beat louder and harsher.
Then it became clear. Much as I have made my place here for the past years, there will always be that place I should be. . . it's not here. It's the place where I could be with my dad. I can still visit around, much more often that I have done before. This time I'll get it right.
When Franco got home, I was already packing my bags. He asked me why and I answered with a simple, "I have to go. I've got to go back."
Confused and simply surprised, he asked. "What the hell do you mean go back? You're just going to leave the factory?"
I continued packing regardless. There's an insane feeling of euphoria inside me and much as I haven't got an idea where it came from, all I know is, I have to and I want to go back. "It's in good hands. Call me if you need me but this is what dad would have wanted." I zipped my bags and stood up. "See ya, Franco. I'll visit more often, I promise."
"What the-"
This is a rather strange feeling of epiphany. The most impossible thoughts were rushing. I shouldn't have left that place. Something just keeps pushing me to come back to it.
"Harold! Harry! What the f--" Franco pulled me back but I was smiling at him. He sighed, rubbing his forehead with exasperation the same way I do when he wants me to do something stupid. "Are you high?"
"No."
"Are you sick?"
"No."
"Then why the hell are you-"
"I'll visit and I promise that," I said. "I just gotta go back. Read dad's letter if you want an explanation but me? I'm gone." I made my way out.
That lady in the park was right, I was looking for something. I was looking for my dad who had been gone for a long time. I was looking for the parts of myself that I thought he took with him when he went away. I still have to look for the rest of my pieces.
And I'm pretty sure the ones in England are completed. The pieces I need are back there.
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Author's 🎵
Shoutout to RomanceChem for making a guest appearance.
And I'm outie.
~DP22