Jordan sat utterly motionless in the corner of the bathing chamber. She stared straight ahead and struggled against the urge to hunt for William. His face had been in shadow but the hair, the height… She knew the way he stood, his profile. How could she forget? What were the chances that a man who looked like William would show up to taunt her? She couldn’t settle, knowing he could be walking around the city.
Her heart threatened to beat out of her chest and the temperature in the room dropped. He should be dead, she thought. Her breath billowed out of her mouth in a white gust and a thin layer of ice covered the pool several feet away. She remembered the feel of his blood splash over her. She let out a strangled sound and shook her head. Was William so powerful he could come back from the grave?
She gripped fistfuls of hair to stop herself from doing a dozen things at once. She wanted to stand up and scream with fear and rage. She wanted to beat Mr. Parker to a pulp for staring at her as if she was crazy. She wanted to shake him until he believed her, but what would that prove? She needed the Ever After pill more than she needed to breathe. She rose and was halfway to her bedroom door before she forced herself to a standstill. She remembered the shock and agony in Mr. Parker’s eyes as he absorbed the tide of her power. He hadn’t returned to The Aquarium. She took a step forward. Heath and Cibrian eyed her like a ticking bomb. She took two steps back, paused.
She went back to her corner in the bathing chamber and wrapped her arms around her knees. Adrenaline rushed through her, demanding she do something, anything. She sat, wracked with indecision. Had she hurt anyone in the temple? Was she any better than William? She was capable of hurting people without meaning to. The expression on Mr. Parker’s face when he turned from her in the apple grove made her cringe and bury her face against her knees. Had she really seen William or had she conjured up an image of her worst nightmare while meditating Thishe surrounded her?
Knight hissed as he entered the frigid room. He ambled up to Jordan and stretched out beside her. She dove a hand into his fur and let his heat wash away the chill. She thought of the Ever After pill Mr. Parker carried and wished she could take it without his knowledge. She grabbed a fistful of Knight’s fur to stop the compulsion to rush to the kitchen and look for pills, anything to numb out.
So many thoughts passed through her mind. Had she really thought she could be normal? Star couldn’t break out of her drug addiction to be a mother and Mr. Parker hadn’t cared enough to stay around. Had he known about her? He didn’t say so, but… how could he not know? Her body shook, trying to keep her power and emotions contained. She didn’t belong here. She should leave. Knight clamped his mouth around her thigh and squeezed lightly. The pain made her raise her head. The water in the bathing pool bubbled and frothed over the tiles.
Jordan felt as if she couldn’t breathe. Her throat was scorched by smoke and fire. Jordan scrambled towards the bench where she left the necklace and reached with frantic hands for the glass pendant. Her hands closed around the small circle. She closed her eyes and focused the last of her shaky control. Instantly, her power drained away. That awful, clawing need for destruction faded, replaced with a cleansing emptiness. Relief coursed through her and she slumped to the floor with the circle clutched in her hand. The pendant filled with red liquid that looked eerily like blood. Knight nudged her with his head, concerned.
Jordan rolled on her back and looked up at the dark skylight. If she wasn’t chosen to go into a school, Mr. Parker would let her go. He never wanted her anyway. Even as she lay there, her power slithered to life once more. Dread swamped her. It was beginning again. Today she received a small trickle of power, but it was building again into that unstoppable force that made her drown herself in pills. She could feel threads of William’s power weaving through her own, making it less hers and all his. Had he changed her power when he created the soul tie? She could see his face as he whispered, “You will never be free of me.” Jordan got to her feet. She needed air.
She rushed through the bedroom to the main living area, past the koi pond to the balcony doors. She yanked them open and welcomed the blast of frigid air. Tears of fear and self-disgust froze on her face. She couldn’t cry, the cold wouldn’t allow it. She walked onto the balcony and fell to her knees near the edge of the railing-less platform and looked down at the canopy of trees. She fixed her eyes on the Garden of Wintra as if she had x-ray vision that could pinpoint William through the canopy. She bowed her head and tried to cool the fire within.
“Jordan?”
A coat dropped around her shoulders and Levi pulled her back from the edge. He turned her around and slipped her arms through the sleeves and zipped it up. She couldn’t meet his eyes.
“You’re blocking me,” he said.
She said nothing.
“It’s okay, Jordan.”
“It’s not okay. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Look at me.”
“No.” She was afraid what he would see if he looked into her eyes.
Levi let the silence stretch. “Are you sure you saw William?”
Her hands closed into fists at her sides. “I’m not crazy.”
“You didn’t answer the question.”
“No.”
“No?” Levi repeated.
“I made sure his heart stopped beating.” Jordan finally met his gaze. “Tonight, he was far away and most of his face was in shadow, but I swear it was him. I know it doesn’t make sense.” Her eyes were haunted. “I should be back in Haven on the pill.”
“No. You just need to learn how to control your power.”
Jordan’s eyes were glassy. “What if I killed those people in Walmart?”
“You didn’t.”
“How do you know? If Mr. Parker hadn’t taken my power, if he hadn’t stopped me I could have-”
Levi grasped her shoulders and then yanked his hands back with a hiss of pain. His hands were covered in boils. Jordan backed into the corner of the balcony, waving her hands in front of her face like someone trying not to cry. Her hair hissed with flames and her eyes flickered between sapphire blue and black. Jordan bowed her head and tried to rein in her power, which made her body glow. Levi watched through narrow eyes because the heat radiating off of her was so strong. Just when he was about to run and get help, Knight padded onto the balcony. Before Levi could haul him back, Knight walked up to Jordan and rubbed against her, unaffected by the fire racing over her body. The fire leapt from Jordan to the Valor and he purred as if enjoying the heat. Jordan buried her face in Knight’s fur. The Valor didn’t move as he absorbed Jordan’s power with a loud belch and shake of his mane. The flames vanished from them both.
“Jordan?”
“William did something to me. I know it.”
A chill ran down his spine. “What are you talking about?”
“The day he died, William tied our souls together, but I can feel him even though Mr. Parker says he broke the bond. My power was strong before, but now I keep… overheating. I’m like a battery getting recharged every hour. It’s worse than before.”
“Maybe you should talk to Mr. Parker,” Levi said uneasily.
Jordan’s blue eyes flashed. “Did you see the way he looked at me? I don’t think so. He didn’t even come back with us.”
“Maybe he went to the hospital or something.” Levi stopped when he saw Jordan’s anger fade to guilt. “Or maybe he’s sleeping it off. He must be feeling like shit after taking on so much of your power.”
Jordan scratched Knight’s head. He purred and his tail swished. “I don’t know if I should be here.”
“You definitely can’t go back to the real world. Who knows what you’ll do.”
She shot him a killing look. “Thanks.”
“Let’s get some sleep.”
“I can’t.”
Levi jerked his head at Knight. “Keep the Valor by you. Seems like he can help you just as much as that pendant.”
She glanced at the pendant resting against her chest. “I can only channel small amounts of power into it. If I’m overheating, I don’t think the pendant can stop me.”
“Maybe that’s why Knight’s your Guardian.”
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