"Hello there! Welcome to Lumières. Party of four?"
After I greet the group of people entering the restaurant, I grab a few menus and lead them to a vacant table, letting them sit down before informing them of their waitress's name and estimated time of arrival.
The first thing I did when we moved in was find a job. Lumières, an upscale French restaurant only ten minutes from my house, was the first place to give me an interview and offer me a position as a hostess. Because my parents have made it clear that they want me to become a pilot, just like my dad, I know that they would never approve of my wishes to teach, or pay for my degree. I've been saving for college for a year now, but I'm not even close. It's difficult to balance school, work, volleyball, and helping take care of my younger brothers and sisters.
"Hey, Haven. How's it going?" I look up to see Zara smiling at me, awaiting an answer. She's just a couple years older than me, and she's also a hostess here. She works full-time, though. She dropped out of high school her senior year when she got pregnant.
"Great. How about you?" She nods, pulling a small mirror out of her pocket and rubbing underneath her eyes to fix her makeup. She, somehow, is allowed to wear pants with her low cut blouse. Our boss, James, gave me three identical uniforms, composed of a black fitted skirt with a slit on the left leg and a black long sleeved blouse made of sheer fabric with a black camisole underneath.
"Bitchin'. Jeremy got me knocked up again," she tells me, and my eyes widen at the news.
"Oh, congratulations, Zara! When did you find out?" I smile a wide smile and give her shoulder a reassuring squeeze.
"Yesterday, actually. My sister is already planning a baby shower, even though I'm not due for several months. You're invited, by the way." She seems so nonchalant about the baby inside her, but I can tell she's trying hard to be.
"I'd love to come. Um, does this mean you won't be working much anymore?" I ask her, not wanting to assume she'd give up her job. I know many women would be offended at that assumption.
"Yeah, unfortunately. I'll keep going for another month or two probably, but I'm thinking about taking a few months off before I blow. Shit gets real around the sixth month, no joke." I smile at her profanity.
"We'll miss you."
"Oh, hey! How was your first day at school? That was yesterday, right?" Zara asks, suddenly remembering. "Any hot guys?"
"It was great. There definitely were hot guys." I look over to see an elderly couple entering the restaurant. "I'll fill you in in just a minute."
"Hello there! Welcome to Lumières. Party of 2?"
When I get back to my podium in the front lobby of the restaurant, Zara has already disappeared. I update the seating chart in front of me while waiting for her to get back.
"Hey, Sunshine."
My head snaps up to see Sin standing before me. He wears the same black shirt and blue jeans, his jacket missing. His shirtsleeves are pushed up to his elbows, his glorious arms exposed. My eyes flit over the tattoos, taking him in. When my eyes reach his face, I realize he's looking at me in a similar way. I'm suddenly very aware of what I'm wearing. He's most likely less infatuated and less impressed than I, but his eyes drink me in as well, scanning over my body. The moment reminds me of the one we shared yesterday in the hallway.
He pushes a hand through his hair and smirks. "You work here?"
"Um, yeah. You eat here?"
Wow, smooth response, Haven. I mentally kill myself.
His smirk grows. "I'm just meeting some people."
"Okay. Um, who are you here to meet? Let me look at my-"
He cuts me off abruptly. "I see them now. Thanks, Sunshine. See you around."
With that, he stalks off into the restaurant. I let my arms drop to my sides and watch him walk away. That was odd. Before I have a chance to question it further, Zara returns to my side.
"So spill. How many guys did you meet?"
After filling her in on the events of my day, mostly centered around nameless boys, my shift ends. I clock out and drive home, only to be met at the door by screaming. I roll my eyes, rushing up to Ollie's room.
"Ethan?" I call out. There's no sign of my older brother in Ollie's room, however.
"Hey, Ollie," I say in a calming voice. His red eyes look up at me expectantly, and I reach inside his crib to put him on my hip. "Shhh, I've got you. Calm down, baby."
I bounce up and down a little in attempts to calm him down further before looking around in hopes to find Ethan. When Ollie has finally quietened, I leave his nursery with him on my hip to find Ethan.
"Ethan!" I call out again, angry at my brother for leaving Ollie alone. "Ethan, where the hell are you?!" I continue calling out, but I'm careful not to shout and upset Ollie again. I turn the corner towards the kitchen. I find Ethan standing in front of the refrigerator with the door hanging open, nothing but a pair of sweatpants on.
"Ethan!" He turns his head slightly and gives a little smile, pulling his headphones out of his ears.
"Hey, Bee. You're back from work already? I figured you'd be back late again." I roll my eyes at him and look pointedly at my baby brother.
"Ethan, what the fuck have you been doing? First thing I get home, I hear Ollie screaming. He seems as if he's been crying for hours." I look down at him, grabbing a tissue off the counter to wipe at his face.
"I didn't hear a thing. Headphones. But I saw him like twenty minutes ago and he was fine." He just shrugs, and I scoff.
"You suck as a nanny," I tell him, not that surprised.
"Wow. You know, I'm really gonna have to come to come to terms with that one day. Until then," he trails off, pairing a shrug with his sarcasm. "The hell are you wearing?"
I look down at my uniform. "This is my work uniform," I say simply.
"What, do you work at a Goth Hooters or something?"
"What? No. This is a standard hostess outfit. It's just a black shirt and skirt," I defend the outfit.
"Whatever. Just go put on some more clothes, please." I scoff, having no intention of doing so until after I shower.
"Hypocrisy runs deep in this family." I eye his shirtless torso annoyedly.
I return Ollie to his room, putting him in his high chair with some cereal before knocking on the twins' door.
"Kyla! Kyler! Are you in there?"
"Yes!" I hear Kyla shout back, just as Kyler shouts a "No!"
"Come downstairs and I'll make dinner," I tell them.
"Can you make pancakes?" I hear Kyler shout, and I roll my eyes.
"Maybe if you go downstairs, we'll see," I say back. It's a struggle to get them to eat anything but chicken nuggets, pancakes, or poptarts.
"Yay!" Kyla shouts, and I hear a few thuds before going to my own room for a moment. I grab the book for my lit class to do my reading as I cook and clip the baby monitor from Ollie's room onto my skirt.
Once I'm downstairs, I begin making steamed veggies and chicken strips. I look over my reading from time to time between stirring or zesting, trying to get through as much as possible. Kyla and Kyler sit on the couch arguing about something. Ethan comes in, ruffles their hair, and leans against the kitchen counter.
"Mom just called. She'll be home from the bakery soon. What are you making?" Ethan asks from behind me.
"Chicken and veggies," I respond, putting the lid back over the pan of veggies. "Here. Stir this in two minutes. I'm going to get Ollie and Destiny down here." I put my wooden spoon down and point to the pan as I instruct Ethan, hoping he does so.
I go upstairs and knock on my little sister's door before going in. "Hey, Destiny, dinner's almost ready."
She lays on her bed with her cell phone in hand, smacking her gum in an annoyed manner. "I'm not hungry, Bee. Go away." Now I roll my eyes. She's only eleven, but she started the teen rebellion stage early.
"Destiny, you have to eat. Come downstairs, please. Mom will be home soon," I tell her. "You can bring your phone."
"Ughhh, fine." She rolls off her bed and pushes past me towards the staircase, her big brown curls bouncing the whole way.
On my way to Ollie's nursery, I sigh and run a frustrated hand through my hair. I can't believe Mom has been late getting home every day this week. I thought she would start working less whenever we moved here. Ollie goes to a daycare on weekdays until 4, and Ethan and I pick him up most days. Whenever Mom works late and Dad is out of town, which is always, I'm the one in charge of the kids. That includes making sure they have dinner, do their homework, take showers, and get to bed on time.
I roll my eyes again. I'm a seventeen year old, part time mother of four.
"Very appealing," I sarcastically mutter under my breath in response to my thoughts, entering the kitchen and putting Ollie in his high chair beside the kitchen table.
"I think this is starting to burn," Ethan tells me, so I rush over to try and salvage the meal.
"I told you to stir it!" I let out a long exhale, finishing up dinner. Ethan, Destiny, and the twins join Ollie around the large oak table, and I put the dishes in front of each of them.
"How many calories is in this?" Destiny asks me, looking up from her phone momentarily.
"There are almost no calories in vegetables, Dee."
"But there's some, right? And lots in chicken?"
"Why do you always ask that?" Kyler chimes in, and words begin to fly around the table.
"Because she thinks she's fat," Kyla says, unknowingly mortifying Destiny.
"Ky, don't say that."
"I do not think that! I'm, like, so skinny."
"What's calories?"
"God's way of punishing hungry girls." I roll my eyes at that one.
"They're God's way of keeping us alive, Dee." I try to reason with her, but she just continues cutting up her food.
"You fried this chicken, right? Are you trying to make me go up a size?" My eyes widen, and my brows knit themselves together.
"Destiny, you are eleven! Stop worrying about your body, okay? You're beautiful." I pat her shoulder, but she just picks up her phone again and eats a mouthful of veggies.
Ten minutes later, I've finished my food and left the rest of my siblings to begin the dishes, knowing they would never do them themselves. I once got Ethan to agree to doing the dishes, but that just meant letting them stack up until mice came.
I hear a door slam, and put down my sponge. My head whips around to see my mother walking through the door.
"Mommy!" Kyla shouts, running towards her, abandoning her dinner. She wraps herself around my mom's waist, a bright smile covering her face.
"Hey there, Kyla! How was your day?"
I finish the few dishes left in the sink as she greets everyone, and as I do so, I get more and more angry. Ethan gives her a kiss on the cheek and goes upstairs, and Kyler pushes his last piece of chicken in his mouth and goes upstairs without a word.
After a promise from my mother to sit beside her, Kyla returns to her seat across from Ollie.
Mom comes up to the counter behind me and grabs a plate, eying me warily. I know that she can tell I'm mad.
"Hey, Bee."
"Hi," I reply curtly. I try to remind myself that she is my mother before addressing her again.
"Dinner looks great," she comments.
"Thank you." Take deep breaths, Haven. Deep breaths.
"You got Destiny to eat?" she says lowly, so she doesn't hear. I give her a quick hum, not enjoying this small talk. I am getting increasingly worried about Destiny, though.
"She has her phone at the table, though." My mother hates cell phone use at the table, and at church, and school, and most places. She's constantly scolding us for it, or at least when she's around to do it.
"It's the only way I could get her at the table," I explain. "Not that you would know that."
"Bee-"
"You also wouldn't know that I made the volleyball team yesterday."
"Congra-"
"Or that Ethan is trying out for the soccer team again. Or that Kyla has a piano recital next weekend. Or that Ollie bit another kid at daycare today," I list, attempting to have her realize how little she sees us.
"Bee, I'm sorry. I had work, okay?"
"Mom, I don't need you to be sorry! I need you to be here! The minute I got home from work, I had to take care of Ollie, make dinner, convince Dee to eat! I go to school and work all day, too, Mom. It's not fair to Ethan and I."
I push my hair back frustratedly, not caring that I leave some soapy water from the dishes in it. My mom looks as if I punched her in the face. She sucks her teeth and reaches down to smooth out her skirt.
"I don't mean to put that burden on you, Bee. I'm sorry. It's just that business has been booming lately, and you're so good at caring for them. It... it gets lonely without your father sometimes, too," she tells me. I bug my eyes a bit at her excuses.
"Lonely?! There's five kids here to keep you company. Don't you realize how much we miss you? Kyla clamps onto you like a leech every time you walk through the door. Kyler is so angry that he doesn't see you, he won't hardly say your name. How are you gonna feel if you miss Ollie's first words or steps? Ethan and I's graduation?"
"Honey, I'd never miss those things! You guys are the most important things in my life." She pushes her heavily hairsprayed blonde bob out of her face as she tries to convince me.
"Mom, I know you love us, but you've already missed so much. In Charlotte, you weren't there for any of Kyler's t-ball games. Or whenever Destiny sang a solo with the church choir. Hell, my best friend's mom took me to buy my first bra!"
"I'm sorry, Haven! How many times do I have to apologize for all of that?!" Now she's frustrated, but I'm not letting up.
"I don't care how much you apologize, Mom! Just start being there... I thought things might be different when we moved."
"Look, Bee. I promise you, it will get better. I'll start coming home before dinner, alright? I'll start being here for you guys. You're right. It's not fair." A small smile finds its way on my face, and she pulls me toward her for a hug. I feel a large breath I didn't know that was holding fall from my lips.
"Let me finish up the dishes. You go rest," she tells me, widening my smile. "And congratulations on making the volleyball team."
"Thanks, Mom. Do you want me to take Ollie up to his nursery?"
"No, go on. I can do that."
I go upstairs and strip out of my work outfit, changing into some yoga pants and a tank top.
Just as I pull my laptop and a notebook for Calculus out of my book bag to hopefully catch up online, I get a call from Taylor.
"Hey, Taylor. What's up?" I answer.
"Hey, Haven. I'm just going over some of my notes for our Lit class, and I figured you could use some. I can't believe Mrs. Hall is making you catch up in, like, a day."
Mrs. Hall gave me an overview of everything they've covered in the semester today, expecting me to be ready to go by tomorrow.
I smile at her generosity, even though I've almost finished the book by now.
"Yeah, that'd be great, actually. I've got quite a bit of calculus to do, too. Apparently Mr. Reynolds doesn't believe in teaching," I say, still thinking it's unbelievable.
"But isn't your seventh hour free?" she reminds me. "And you have Mr. Reynolds during sixth hour? You basically have two free classes in a row. You could leave campus, or take a nap," she points out.
"Damn, you're right. I didn't even think of it like that," I say.
"Yeah, you've just got be more optimistic," she tells me.
"That's gonna be tough," I say with a laugh, letting my caramel blonde hair fall down, into my face.
"Do you wanna get some coffee tomorrow before school?" Taylor suggests. "Kace and I were going to, but he bailed last minute."
"Ah, so you had to settle for second best," I joke, even though I'm not offended at all. I roll on my back, giving up on starting Calculus.
"No! I just want to get to know ya, with Kace there or not," she recovers. I laugh, knowing what she meant.
"I know, I know. And yes, coffee sounds great. You have a place in mind?" I ask her.
"Yeah, we can meet at Jeanie's Coffee. It's on Main Street, by the mall," she informs me.
"Oh yeah, I think I've seen it." I recall a giant mug sitting outside, curious to try it. "I'll see you then."
---
The next morning I wake up an hour before my alarm, frustrated. I cannot go back to sleep, so I decide to get up and shower. After my shower, I creep around as to not wake up any of the little ones.
I get dressed in a cute gray crop top with long sleeves and a pair of black jeans, adding boots to the look. After checking the time and seeing I have half an hour before I have to leave, I curl my hair and do my makeup.
I arrive at Jeanie's early, despite taking my time this morning. I order a latte and a muffin for myself, sitting at a small booth to wait for Taylor.
A couple minutes later, Taylor shows up, also early.
"Hey, Haven! Am I late?" she asks, hugging me and sitting across the booth.
"No, we're both early, actually," I tell her, taking a sip of my coffee. "Go ahead and order if you want."
When she returns to the table, she asks why I got here so early.
"Honestly, I was ready to get out of my house. My mom is getting on my last nerve, and there are always a bunch of little kids running around there."
"What about your dad?" she asks me. "You mentioned he was a pilot."
"Yeah, he's in Havana right now, I think... or maybe Toronto."
"Are you close with him?" Taylor asks me, sipping her own coffee.
"I don't know if I'd share every detail of my sex life with him, but I'd say I miss him a lot," I respond. "I definitely grew up a daddy's girl."
"I guess you could say the same about me," Taylor tells me.
"Oh yeah? You're close with you dad?" I question.
"Yeah. Well, dads," she corrects. I furrow my brows, asking for a clarification. "I was adopted. My dads are gay."
"Oh, okay," I say, understanding now. "That's awesome."
"Yeah, they're the best. Pete is a totally hardcore athlete, and kind of got me into sports. Clint is more of a softie—a true sweetheart. He loves Kace, like almost too much." I mirror her smile as she talks about her dads, clearly happy.
"Does Pete not like Kace?" I ask.
"No, he does. I just think Clint might try and steal him away from me someday." We both laugh, and I decide to ask her about Kace.
"How long have you and Kace been together?"
"Almost..." she pauses to think about it, "3 months. We started going out when junior year ended." I nod as she goes on. "I was kind of friends with everyone in his circle, but I mostly hung out with Skylar and a couple of girls on the volleyball team. Once he and I started dating, I was kind of added to that group, and I guess Skylar came along."
"So before you, there were no girls in their group at all?" I ask.
"Well, a few would usually cycle through. They would last about a week or so until the guys got tired of them. Not in like a gross, douchebag way, I don't think. It was more, like, no one ever really suited them." Taylor tries to explain, but I have trouble believing that Peyton and Beckett were looking for a serious relationship with anyone.
I just nod, not sure what to say or ask now.
"What are you drinking?" I ask her, sipping my latte and taking another bite of my muffin.
"A soy milk chai latte with peppermint syrup and extra foam," Taylor recites her order. I roll my eyes.
"Ugh, your one of those people? A complicated coffee order person? You so don't seem like the type," I heckle her. She also rolls her eyes, clearly having heard this before.
"Look, call me high maintenance or whatever you want, but I love it." She takes a large sip dramatically. I laugh lightly in response, taking another bite of muffin.
"Haven, I didn't know you'd be here!"
Taylor and I look up to see Kace and Beckett rolling up, nearing our booth.
"Kace? I thought you couldn't meet for coffee," Taylor asks him as they slide in next to us.
"Nah, babe. I said I probably couldn't. It turned out I could, though," Kace tells her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, her natural brown curls pushed to the side.
"And you brought Beck?" I ask, unsure of why he'd do that if he thought it was a coffee date for them.
"Well, I heard you were going, Haven, and I didn't want you to feel like a third wheel," Beck tells me, wrapping his own arm around my shoulders.
"So you invited yourself," Taylor concludes.
"Not just me," Beck explains. "Peyton, Sin, and Skylar are coming, too. Sin drove his car today."
"So much for our coffee date," Taylor says to me, laughing it off. I laugh as well, thinking that a group coffee date will be interesting.
"Hey, Taylor! Hey, Ave!" Peyton's voice comes bellowing through the coffee shop. We each smile at his charismatic voice, turning towards it. Sin holds the door open for Skylar just behind them, and I smile at the chivalry.
"Hey, Peyton," I respond. "Hey, Skylar," I add as the remaining two join us at our tiny booth. "Hey, Sin."
"This booth is not big enough for seven," Beck points out.
"Well, we weren't exactly expecting to have seven people in it," Taylor counters as everyone tries to squish in.
"Here, Haven. You can sit on my lap," Peyton offers, pushing his dirty blonde hair out of his face.
"No thanks, Pay. I'm not sure you can be trusted," I tell him, knowing how flirtatious he was yesterday with all the pick up lines.
"Oh, come on, Ave. You can totally trust me. I cannot espresso how much I've been thinking about you," he begins. I roll my eyes with a smile, amused once again.
"Peyton, I think these pick up lines are getting worse," Skylar comments, fiddling with her multicolored braid.
"Come on, Skylar, you're just mad I don't throw some charm at you, too." Peyton winks at her, but Beck cuts him off before he continues.
"Haven, don't let him get to you. You and I both know something is brewing between us." I giggle at his, but roll my eyes again.
"If you two put as much effort into school as you do these pick up lines, you'd be valedictorians," I comment, biting my muffin.
"Ugh, Ave, you're such a tea-se," Peyton tells me, completely ignoring my point.
"Yo, Sin, grab us some coffees, will you?" Beck asks him, making me raise my eyebrows and turn to look at Sin. He's been nearly silent this morning.
"Why should I?" Sin asks, his voice a bit raspy and his eyes a bit tired. He holds a calm, stoic look in his eyes, but he still manages to look somewhat friendly and light around his friends.
"Because you're on the outside," Beck replies, as if it were an obvious rule. Sin lets out a deep breath, but stands to go get coffee.
"Kace, you want anything?" Sin asks. He just shakes his head in response. Sin leaves, and I wonder if he has everyone's order memorized. He never asked for specifics.
Sin returns minutes later with a green tea, which is passed to Skylar, a vanilla cappuccino for Peyton, and black coffees for himself and Beckett. Sin adds two sugars to his, blowing on it for a while before taking a sip.
"Can I have a bite of your muffin, Ave?" Peyton asks. I nod, despite my reluctance. I love food, and I don't typically share my own. I decide I can spare a small bite, tearing off a bit to give to him.
"Did you not eat this morning?" I ask him.
Peyton shakes his head, as if I should know this. "I never eat breakfast."
"What?! That's terrible. Breakfast is the most important meal you eat. Without breakfast, it takes longer for your body to wake up and react to things," I tell him, bewildered at his indifference to breakfast.
"I just never have time." He shrugs. "Plus, my parents are always at work by the time I wake up, and I don't know how to cook."
"Same here, actually," Skylar adds.
"Me too," Kace says.
"I never eat breakfast," Sin admits, joining the guilty party.
"What?! You guys, that is terrible."
I look around me, horrified at the bunch of mislead teens, clearly famished from missing breakfast for the last several years.
"Sorry, Mom. We'll try to better ourselves," Beck says sarcastically, and I nudge his shoulder in response, rolling my eyes for the hundredth time this morning.