Amber
I wake up as I hear the car door open. I fell asleep on our way to pick Antonio up. I had a pretty restless night. I had a hard time falling asleep with so many thoughts swarming my mind and I had a few nightmares that woke me up throughout the night. I sit up and stretch before getting out of the car. As I do I can see Antonio walking toward us but I stop for a moment when I notice Angelo come out from behind him. He apologized for his behaviour but I still don't know if I can trust him. While Nico puts their suitcases in the trunk I greet them.
"Cara!" Antonio walks up to me and hugs me. He lets go and hold me by my arms.
"How are you? You have been so strong. I am very proud of you." I smile at his kind words. He's always so kind.
"I'm okay, uncle. But I do want him to wake up soon. I'm not sure how much more I can really take." His smile seems to drop.
"You are the strongest person I know. Do not worry."
"Buongiorno." Angelo stretches out his hand and I shake it. He seems to keep his distance and says nothing more. I can tell he's uncomfortable and something about him seems different. His usual cocky demeanor is gone.
"Let's go." Nicholas speaks and I get in the front with him while both Antonio and Angelo sit in the back. The drive back is mostly silent and the air is filled with tension. I know that for Antonio to want to come here it takes something serious and very important. I just can't imagine what. We finally pull up and walk in the safe house while some men come out and take the suitcases to their room.
"It is a shame my nephew's house was damaged." I nod.
"It is."
"May we go see him before discussing what I came to say?" I really hoped to get an answer first but of course I can't deny him that.
"Of course, uncle. Let's go." All fours us head to the medical wing. My heart flutters because I haven't gotten a chance to see Alessandro since last night. We eventually reach his room. Right now, it's Luca's turn to guard Alessandro and we all greet him.
"Luca!" Antonio walk up and gives him a quick hug.
"We all miss you but I am glad you came here. Thank you for helping my nephew. I am proud and your father would be too." I see Luca smile.
"Grazie." Angelo goes up and greets him as well. Nicholas gives him a quick 'hello'. It's my turn now.
"Thank you Luca. You did an incredible job." I throw my arms around him.
"I am glad you are fine, Amber. I was worried. I am also sorry for what has happened to Alessandro."
"Thank you Luca." I let him go and he stays outside while the rest of us go in. As soon as we do Antonio gasps.
"Oh, figlio." He walks up to Ale and holds his hand.
*Son*
"Fight." He kisses his hand before letting go and turning back to us.
"May I speak to the doctor?"
"Of course." Nicholas answers and walks out with him and I stay with Angelo who's talking to Alessandro.
"I'll be right back." He looks at me as if waiting for me to say I'll be fine. He doesn't trust Angelo anymore than Ale did but I nod and he glares at Angelo before leaving.
"Perdonami. Per favore, svegliati."
*Forgive me. Please, wake up.*
I didn't hear whatever he said before but it seems his words hold sadness. In this moment, watching him leaning over his cousin with a broken look on his face I can tell he cares for him. He discretely wipes a tear away and looks up while clearing his throat.
"Amber." He stops and thinks before speaking.
"I already apologized but I hope you know I meant it. I also want to thank you. I regret what I have done but it has helped me. I was losing myself in alcohol, drugs and women. That night, it made me think of what I was doing with my life. I promise I am not a bad man and you helped me turn back into the person my father raised. I do not expect you to trust me but I wanted you to know all this. I am fighting. I still have a lot to do but I am trying." I remember he was drunk that night and he does seem different somehow. Now that I think about it he did seem a little worn out the last time I saw him and now he looks healthier. I still don't trust him completely but I can see the hope and sincerity in his eyes.
"Thank you for sharing that with me Angelo. You're right, I don't trust you but I can if you give me reasons to." I smile and he grins.
"You are truly as kind as everyone says. An angel in a cruel world. You even managed to help me. Do not let this change you, please. Do not lose yourself." He signals to Ale and then looks back.
"You aren't the first person to say that but I've promised to myself that I won't let that happen." We smile at each other. He walks up and opens his arms.
"May I?" I close the distance between him and return the hug. There are people that just need someone to believe in them.
"I am here to serve you and protect you like everyone else." I smile at his promise.
"Thank you." We let go and just as we do, the door opens and both Nico and Antonio walk in. Nicholas looks at the short distance between us and stiffens before looking up at me. I shake my head and smile and he seems to relax, understanding that I'm fine.
"Well, let's go to the office then." I decide to speak and the rest agree with me. We make our way out and walk over to the office to discuss whatever important matter brought Antonio here. Once we do we all take a seat.
"One of my reasons for coming was to see my nephew but I have something to say that is very important. Amber, you understand that Alessandro is the highest form of power for us but there are others who also hold power. They are not happy with you taking Alessandro's place. They accepted it but now that they know he might...not make it, they are getting impatient. I do not agree but they are older men of more 'traditional' thinking. They believe a woman is not fit to be capo. They want Nicholas to take his place. I came to evaluate Alessandro's health. I will try to reason with them but I can not promise you much. I will ask them to give us until the end of this month and if Alex is not awake...you must marry Nicholas and he must be the new Capo." Nicholas practically jumps out of his seat.
"No. He's alive and as long as he is, they can't do this. They want to play by their stupid rules? Fine! But the rules state that a permanent replacement can only be made if the current Capo wants it or if he's dead, so they can't! Not as long as he's breathing! He's fighting to come back! If he wasn't, he would already be gone! Anyone else wouldn't have survived and that just proves that he's meant to stay as Capo!" Nicholas is seething. He's bright red and I have never seen him so angry. He's always so calm and collected that I can't even recognize him right now.
"Nico." Antonio stands up and walks over to Nicholas. He places a hand on his shoulder and he seems to calm down.
"I do not want this. Amber has proven she can handle this but you must understand that sometimes we must do things to keep peace. I will convince them to wait but I can not do more. It is up to Alex. He must wake up. " I sit in silence and take this all in. I forgot about that whole situation and I honestly don't want this but I've come to terms with having to follow certain rules. They've changed my life so much and it's a small price to pay if it means things will stay in order. I don't want Nicholas to start fighting for a change if it will disrupt everything.
"But-" I cut Nicholas off.
"Nico, it's alright. I know he's alive and we'll keep him here as long as his heart keeps beating. We won't give up on him. This is merely politics. If it means keeping the order then we have to do it. It's my duty as current Capo and your duty as the right-hand man. Alessandro might wake up but it might be a little late, don't you think he'll have enough to worry about? Do you want to give him more work?" Nicholas looks at me with the most intense sadness I've seen in his eyes. It almost makes my heart break. He doesn't want to replace his brother as if he were already gone and he doesn't want to force me into a marriage with him but it has to be done. I smile and hold his hand.
"It'll be alright." I smile at him while holding his hand.
"Besides, we still have three weeks for him to wake up. There's still hope. If we have to do it, we'll go through it together." He looks down at me with tenderness.
"Together." I smile as he repeats that word.
"Sempre." I answer and he smiles as well. I know how much that phrase means to them.
"I will leave tomorrow and speak to them. I need to make the deal with them quickly." I nod at Antonio.
"Thank you, uncle." He smiles.
"Let us hope they will accept and more importantly, let us hope Alessandro awakens." We all nod. Angelo has stayed silent the whole time but he actually seems just as uncomfortable with the situation. We get up and after a few jumbled farewells I go to Emily's room. I haven't talked to her since I got back. As I walk through the hallways I pass a few Windows and notice that it's already night. I take out my cellphone and look at the time. It's already past dinner! It's a good thing I'm not too hungry, I have a lot on my mind and being stressed out takes away my appetite. After a good five minutes of walking around the building I finally reach the room Emily and Marcos are sharing. I raise my hand ready to knock but I stop when I hear some strange noises coming from the other side of the room. It's a mix of grunting, panting and a squeaky bed. I stop for a minute. What is going on in there? Wait. Emily isn't...
"Oh my God! Marcos...oh!" I run out of there as fast as I can but I still manage to hear Marcos answer.
"Fuck! Babe...you're so tight!" I run out of there faster than I've ever run before. They need to learn how to be quiet and I need to wash out my ears and erase my memory. As soon as I can no longer hear them I slow down and walk to the medical wing.
I don't know how I'm ever going to get that out of my head but I guess in the end I'm happy that Emily finally got over her insecurities. I know how hard it is and for her it was even worse. It should have been harder for me but I guess in a weird twisted way I was used to it. For her it was a huge change from her old life. I smile. I hope he really does make her happy. My smile drops almost immediately though as Alessandro comes into my mind. Just as his face pops into my head, I realize I'm already in the medical wing. I walk over to the room where Ale is and greet Luca again, who's still guarding my husband.
"You're still here?" He nods.
"Yes, it seems my replacement is running late."
"Who's taking over after you?"
"I am not sure but I believe it is Marcos." I had forgotten about my recent encounter but it comes back.
"Oh, yeah he's...a little caught up in something at the moment. You can leave if you want though, I'm staying with him tonight." He shakes his head.
"Sorry, Mrs. Santos. My orders are to stay here until my replacement comes." I laugh, he's always so proper and minding the rules.
"Alright. I'll keep you company until Marcos shows up and since when did you stop calling me 'Amber' again?"
"I apologize. I suppose I still am not used to the informality. If I may know, what is he busy with?"
"Uh, I'm not sure. He just told me was going to check something out." I am not telling him he was having...sex...with my best friend.
"Alright." We sit in silence but he breaks it.
"Amber. How are you really?" I take a deep breath, something I've been doing a lot. I have been trying to hide how much this is weighing down on me but I think I can speak openly with Luca.
"Not well. First, I know it wasn't directly my fault that he was shot but if I had been patient maybe we wouldn't be in this position. I still feel responsible, you know? Then, I had all my hope built up for the moment we got him back and I was ready to hug him, kiss him and simply be with him but instead he's lying on a hospital bed fighting for his life. To top it all off, the reason Antonio came was to tell us that Nicholas has to step up as Capo and I need to marry him. I'm stronger than I was a few months ago but it still hurts. I just want to go lie down in a warm bed with Alessandro next to me telling me how much he loves me." My eyes start to water at those final words.
"Amber. You truly are not responsible for this situation. I know it is hard but his heart is still beating, which means he can wake up at any moment and when he does you can do everything you want. As for marrying Nicholas I know it is difficult and unfair but he is a good man, he will never harm you in any way. Most marriages in this world are planned, for status or to be able to maintain power. The Capo must have descendants, another ridiculous rule. Since they are loveless relationships, they tend to be violent or simply dysfunctional. With Nico you will not need to worry for that." I smile and the tears are long gone.
"Thank you, Luca." He smiles back. I enjoy watching these men smile, because it's very rare.
"I have never understood how innocent people get hurt so badly. You have gone through so much pain when you have such a large heart and people like Cobra will never pay for the things they have done. Simple torture is not enough. Life is not fair." He shakes his head.
"It isn't but I also know that if I spend the rest of it asking myself why these things happen to me, I won't be able to enjoy the good things." I turn as I hear the double doors opening and see Marcos walk in. He looks messy, I wonder why.
"Heeeey...Luca...Amber... Sorry for the delay. I'm here now though!"
"Very well, good night to you both." Luca waves and I watch as he leaves. Once he goes through the doors I look at Marcos who seems awfully nervous. I might as well have some fun.
"Sooo, Marcos. Why do you look so...disheveled?" I raise and eyebrow and he gulps while trying to keep a straight face.
"I was just taking care of something, you know normal mafia stuff. Got caught up in a predicament."
"Caught up in a predicament? Hmmmm. Sure it wasn't a somebody?" His eyes go wide.
"How do you know?" He starts to blush and I laugh before going serious. Ew.
"I was going to see Emily but once I get to your room my ears get assaulted by VERY inappropriate noises. I ran as fast as I could but it was too late."
"Shit! I hope no one else heard." I know Marcos and I'm pretty sure he would normally go around talking about how he 'got lucky' but it seems as though he wants to keep things with Em private. It's these small things that let me know he actually cares about her. I walk up to him and comb his hair with my fingers, then I straighten out his shirt and jacket. As for his still flushed face I can't do much.
"Thanks." He smiles. I nod.
"You were...gentle?" I ask immediately after while blushing. These are uncomfortable topics for me but I want to know.
"Of course. I didn't even want to. Well, I mean I did want to but I didn't think she was ready. I had to stop a few times because she would tense up and I insisted we stop but she wanted to keep going. Once we started to...ya know..." He clears his throat and I nod.
"Well, she kind of just relaxed. It hurt her a little but I have never been more gentle in my life. I really tried my best to fight it and I rejected her but she looked at me with the saddest eyes...I didn't do it because I didn't want her. Shit, I want her more than anything. I just didn't want her to rush into something but in the end it was amazing." I see his smile turn into a grin as he seems to remember their encounter.
"It was slow for the most part, soft, gentle. I had never experienced that. It was always fast, hot and messy but this time it was different." I can hear the love that fills his words and my heart swells. I'm happy my best friend found someone worthwhile. I also hold back a chuckle. He always starts rambling about things when it comes to her.
"Alright and Marcos... thanks for taking care of her. Still, if you hurt her I don't know how but I promise I'll beat you to a pulp and bury you myself." He laughs and holds up his arms in surrender.
"No need to get violent. I promise I won't ever hurt her, at least not on purpose. Cuz you know us men are are a little stupid, we don't think thing through." I roll my eyes.
"Alright Marcos, I'll come out in a while. I'm going to go see Ale." His face drops and he nods. I smile before turning around and walking into the room. I look at Alessandro laying on the bed. I go sit in the chair beside him. I hold his hand. I don't know if he can hear me but I'll talk to him. Even if he can't, I'll at least feel like he's really here listening.
"Hey, Ale. I hope you can hear me. I just want to say I love you. I've been really lonely without you. I'm having nightmares again too. The house and bed feel so empty without you. I miss waking up to a kiss from you, I miss hearing you tell me how much you love me...I just miss you in general." I stay silent for a while and try to maintain my composure.
"I wonder if you're having nightmares in there. How about I tell you a story?"
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Author's note: I want to apologize for the slow updates to anyone reading and thank you for your patience and support. I honestly had a lot of schoolwork and from the stress I got a little bit of writer's block.
However, now that my semester is over and I've taken a couple of days to relax my ideas are flowing again. So much in fact, that I've started writing a new story! It's completely different but I hope you'll like it. You can look for it on my profile. It's titled "Remember me."
I promise that writing the new book won't interfere with this one. Which means, "Saving the Mafia Boss" is still my priority. Thank you! :*
Also, I've updated chapters 23 and 24.