UP ABOVE: JON (not Jon Snow).
so guys, I know it seems like Harry's still the one at fault even in a situation like this where Reina is actually the one at fault for the first time because like all this arguing and fighting came from what she did. I just wanted to remind you that she did own up to her mistakes and apologize for them and explained why it happened. There's A LOT of justification behind what she did and what happened.
But with Harry, honestly him calling her a whore and impure is plain cruel, because he didn't do it out of anger, he did it to hurt her. So he too is at fault, and needs to apologize. Reina doesn't need to apologize because SHE ALREADY DID. Just keep that in mind while reading this chapter.
ALSO I listened to Flicker by Niall (baby boy) Horan, while writing the first part of this chapter and I actually cried. You'll see why.
♕♔♕
♕♔♕
"Reina."
The sunlight spilled through the gaps created by the heavy curtains that folded over the large windows of Reina's room. The golden light smoothened over the heavy armor that laid in a messy pile on the floor, crawling over the silver dress that was situated right next to it, causing it to glitter beautifully. The sunlight continued to slither around Reina's room, unwelcomed, and add illumination to the dark parts of it. The sun was unwelcomed because it served as a torturous reminder to forbidden lovers that it was time to separate.
Soft murmurs and chuckles filled up the quiet room after a few minutes. Sheets ruffling. Bare legs tangling. Fingers and hands clinging onto the unattainable. The girl with silver-green eyes traced her delicate fingertips over the scarred pale flesh of her lover's chest, head resting on his shoulder while he stroked her hair. Their gazes met, lips sharing a smile. A smile full of love for each other, as well as sadness because they had to be separated soon. His pink lips brushed against her hairline, leaving a kiss there as he pulled her closer to his bare chest.
"It's the morning," he murmured lowly, shifting down a little to gaze at her face.
"I know."
He detected the obvious sadness and disappointment in her tone. It made his heart ache. He distracted himself from his heartache by admiring her beauty. Her lips were extra pink this morning. He liked that. It reminded him of his pink roses, his favorite flowers to bring for her. Her eyes were a luminous green, so pale they were almost translucent. He loved her eyes. They always had him awe due to the unique color of them and the way they shone brightly in the light. He found the beauty mark above her lip adorable, and reached out to touch it with his thumb, dragging it down to her lips.
She kissed the pad of his thumb, before she reached forwards and kissed the corner of his mouth. Her face was then buried into the crook of his neck, arms tightly wound around his body, legs tangling with his. Jon chuckled lightly under his breath, finding her actions typical because she always clung to him like that when it was time for him to leave. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, hugging her back with a sad heart while she placed a soft kiss on the skin of his neck, whispering something.
"Please don't leave."
Yesterday was Jon's final day as Reina's bodyguard. He was appointed to Lord Commander of her father's army for the coming rebellion against House Styles. He was supposed to get fitted today for his new armor, but here he was far too busy with the princess, all wrapped up in her warmth and sweetness. But Myles was going to cover for him, knowing about the princess and her forbidden love affair. They gave each other their all last night and made love for the first time. Reina knew in her heart that Jon was the one she wanted to do it with, and it wasn't because she wanted to rebel against her father's wishes.
"I have to," Jon forced himself to say, hating the impact those words had on her. "I'll see you again, I swear it."
"When?" she pulled back to look at him.
"I-I don't know exactly," he said unsurely. She looked at him, and just nodded. "I promise it'll be soon, once I know my new schedule."
"Now come, I want to see my princess smile for me," Jon nudged her cheek with his nose, dropping his head low to press kisses against her neck. "How am I to go about with my day if I don't see your smile and have it engraved in my head to keep me going?"
Reina couldn't help but smile uncontrollably at his sweet words, a tiny giggle escaping her lips when he cheered in victory. Jon kissed her forehead before he pulled away to climb out of the bed. Reina sighed sadly, resting her weight on her elbows that were propped up on the bed. Her chin rested in the palm of her hands, bright eyes following her lover who shuffled around the room to retrieve his clothes and strap on his armor. Their gazes met when he pulled his pants on, Reina smirking while Jon looked away with flushed cheeks when they both noticed the love bite on his thigh near his groin. Once he was dressed, he stood in front of Reina whom looked up at him.
He held out his hand for her, bowing respectfully. She placed her hand in his in a habitual manner, making him immediately duck his head to kiss her knuckles. She briefly reminisced to when he first did that to her. He was only a child, training to become a soldier, while she trained to become a true princess. His actions made her blush and run off to her grandmother because that was the first time a boy had ever made her feel so pretty and special. Now it had become a usual thing, something he always did before they departed.
"Until we meet again, my silver-eyed dragoness."
Reina woke up with a pained, quiet groan. When she opened her eyes, she realized that she was not in her bedchamber in her castle in Vardomos. She was in a bigger bedchamber, lying on a massive bed, room full of the colors crimson and gold instead of black and silver. Harry's bedchamber. Her gaze flickered around, a frown taking upon her features as she tried to push herself to sit up. But a sharp pain quickly spread across her abdomen as she did so, causing her to groan in surprise, quickly lying back down again to ease it. She was confused as to why her midriff hurt. But then the pain quickly reminded her of the events last night.
Before her eyes flashed the eventful day she had, especially the insane night she had. She remembered locking Vaera up and crying right after. She remembered the fight her and Harry had before they were ambushed. She remembered the ambush itself and the fear she felt watching Harry fight. She then remembered her getting stabbed, Harry crying out loud in response and rushing to her with trembling hands. Most of all she remembered what she said to him before she passed out, and it caused her heart to fill up with guilt for saying what she said.
She sucked in a breath and tried to sit up again, adjusting herself so that she didn't feel too much pain. Just then, Fredric walked in to check up on Reina, finding her wide-awake now. His heart filled with relief, heading over to her with a rare smile playing on his lips. He had a cup of water for her to drink, which he wanted to leave by her side just in case she hadn't woken up but will do so.
"M'lady, you're awake!" he said happily. "How are you feeling?"
"Exhausted," Reina mumbled tiredly, rubbing her eyes.
"You lost a lot of blood last night," Fredric told her, handing her the cup of water, which she took gratefully. "It is understandable why you still feel tired."
"How long was I asleep for?" she questioned after she took a few gulps of water.
"Well you fell asleep late night yesterday, and it is around midday now," Fredric informed her. "Harry was by your side throughout the entire night, and morning until his father summoned him by getting his own guards to bring him to the throne room since he kept refusing to leave you."
"Oh," Reina murmured, wishing that her heart would warm up at Harry's actions, but it didn't. She was reminded of the horrible fight they had and what she said to him. "When will he be back?"
"Soon enough I suppose," Fredric murmured.
"W-What happened exactly? It all happened so fast and I didn't get time to comprehend anything. How did we arrive in Siremeth? A-And who healed me?"
"Take your time, Princess. I shall answer all of your questions," Fredric said quickly to slow her down, shining that rare smile again. "We found a cottage nearby after the ambush occurred and the family of commoners whom lived there were healers, luckily. They saved your life."
"How convenient," Reina mumbled. "I must see them when I am well and thank them for what they did," she said thoughtfully, thinking to herself how lucky she was to still be alive.
"I am sure Harry will invite them to the kingdom to meet you as soon as you are well, and he's already rewarded them for their help," Fredric told her, surprising her a little because she didn't think Harry would do something like that. "Lord Reyes came to visit you while you were resting."
"He did? He came here to Siremeth?" Reina asked with wide eyes, feeling a rush of relief and happiness to know that her brother was around.
"No, he's not here," Fredric quickly said, causing the light in her eyes to dim down and expression to fall. "It was while we were still in that cottage. He returned to take care of the bodies of the Vardomosi guards who died helping us. He wanted to take you back to Vardomos, but my father demanded for you to return to Siremeth with me."
"Of course he did," Reina muttered a little bitterly. "The only reason I am important to him is because I have to produce heirs to the throne."
"I suppose I cannot argue with that," Fredric said with a grimace. "But it is also because he wants to question you on the ambush because the attacker is a foreigner."
Reina wasn't surprised when he told her this, because she had quickly remembered the foreign symbols carved into the gold of the masks, as well as the fact that the man spoke to her in the foreign language. All must die. It gave her chills, nonetheless she was determined to find out who exactly these people are and anticipate their plans because it seemed like this ambush was only the beginning of something bigger.
"That makes sense, I noticed the symbols," Reina mumbled with a nod. "He spoke to me as well, in the foreign language."
"He did?" Fredric's eyes widened. "What-"
Just then Fredric's words were cut off when the door of the bedchamber swung open, revealing a tired and stressed looking Harry. His weary gaze lifted up and landed on Fredric who was standing beside his bed. Fredric moved away, revealing Reina whom was awake. Harry felt sudden relief flood his body when their gazes interlocked, heart thumping fast in his chest as his lips parted. But he was speechless in an odd way. Fredric excused himself respectfully and headed over to the door to exit the room, meeting Harry's gaze for a second and nodding curtly at him before he left.
"Reina," Harry uttered quietly as soon as he was seated on the edge of the bed by her side. He reached for her hand by her side, trying to push away any hesitation that attempted to stop him. "You haven't any idea of how relieved I am that you are alright."
Reina didn't say anything in response, eyes too busy focused on the cut he had on his cheek from the ambush. The wound had closed quickly, and she was sure it was going to turn into a scar. It made him look older, and more intimidating. Harry sucked in a breath when he felt her fingertips skim the scarred flesh, before her hand retracted, gaze averting. He could see the pain in her eyes, and he didn't know if it were because the sight of him scarred hurt her or not. He was unsure about everything Reina felt towards him now.
"I too am relieved that you are safe and sound," Reina murmured softly, sincerity clear in her tone. Her words couldn't help but lift his heart in his chest a little.
"Reina, I am sorry."
"I am sorry I let this happen to you and that I couldn't protect you," he continued to say, ready to go on with a monologue. "I-I am so terribly sorry for the way I behaved towards you, just utterly cruel and immature. For calling you a whore, and impure and shaming you for the decisions you made when you were i-"
"I forgive you," Reina found herself saying, gaze once again averted to her lap. Harry's brows sloped downwards in surprise.
"I said I forgive you."
"N-No," Harry shook his head all of a sudden, frowning deeply. Reina mirrored his expression, just as confused.
"No? That is what you want to hear, correct?" She was genuinely confused.
"No that's n-not what I want to hear, not right now," Harry was panicking internally. Her forgiving him so easily was very unlike her, and it worried Harry that his actions may have been the reason why she was acting like she was now: submissive.
"Y-You should be arguing with me, and-and demanding a more elaborate apology like you always do. You should be making me grovel at your feet to teach me not to hurt you like that again, why-why are you not doing that?"
"Well you are not the only one at fault in this situation, doing all that wouldn't make sense," she said quietly, looking away.
"But what I called you was unacceptable! You must be livid!"
"I just don't want to fight and argue anymore. I-I do not have the willpower, and it hurts me more than ever now when it happens," Reina said gently with a light sigh, biting her lip. "Making you grovel...there is no point. I've done it before, but it hasn't had any effect on you."
"That is because those situations were different to this one," Harry murmured quietly with knitted brows. "Reina, please, look at me."
"In all those situations you lost your temper and spoke to me as if you haven't a care in the world that I am your wife and I do not deserve to be spoken to with respect and care," Reina snapped her eyes up to stare at him intently. "You were rightfully angry for what happened at the rock pools and I was accepting of that, until you started accusing me of being rebellious as a reasoning for losing my virginity and called me a whore."
"You implied that I was impure as well," Reina could feel the tears building up in her eyes, inwardly cursing at herself. "D-Do you truly think that low of me?"
"No," Harry shook his head immediately with wide eyes, but then visibly cringed because he technically did think that at some point. "I-I was just taught that women were impure when they lost their virginities before marriage. It was the first thing that came to mind."
"Of course, your parents," Reina murmured with a nod of understanding. "I understand, Harry, their influence on you has shaped your views and opinions ever since you were young. It just saddens me that it is that way because it clearly affects the way you react to situations and turns them even more chaotic."
Harry gulped with a nod of agreement. He never had a problem with his ideals until he met Reina, who made him realize how wrong it all was. How unfair some of his ideals were and that they didn't make sense. He then took her hand in his, cupping it with both of his and urging her to look at him.
"That is why I need you to help me learn Reina," he whispered to her desperately. "I-I need you to teach me these things. Teach me how to be more accepting and understanding. It will help me become a better man, a better future King. I do not want to keep fighting with you because of the way our ideals clash."
"But Harry, I tried to tell you these things, even my grandmother did, and I know you have tried but it was never enough," she said with a sigh, making his lips turn downward.
"You do not give me enough time, Reina. I cannot just change so quickly," Harry told her with a sigh.
"I know; it takes time, yes. But-" she paused for a second, unsure of what exactly to say because she didn't want to seem like she was giving up on him so easily.
"But what?" he questioned with an arch of his brow.
"I don't want to keep getting hurt by you for you to learn from your mistakes," she said to him, making him pull back a little with wide eyes. "Yes perhaps I am simply being impatient and selfish but I cannot help it, Harry. I want the fighting to stop."
"Reina," Harry looked at her, fingers moving up to brush against her wet cheek, wiping the tears away. "I am sorry I keep hurting you. I always regret it and I am always too late to stop myself from doing it."
"But I want to be better for you. I truly do. I want to be the husband you deserve. Seeing you on the verge of death yesterday night caused me to realize many things, and yes it is unfortunate that it takes you almost dying to snap me out of mood I was in. But it happened, and I learnt that our constant fighting needs to stop because we will only keep hurting each other until something like that occurs again and we may not even be lucky, we may not even survive."
"If you don't believe that what happened is enough to truly make me change, then it is alright," Harry said with a heavy sigh right after. "I can understand why you feel the way you do after you've constantly tried to teach me and so has your grandmother, yet I never put in all the effort needed to do it. But this time, I promise you I will prove it to you, I will show you that I am serious about changing, and that I will change."
"Alright, Harry," Reina whispered softly with a small nod, her words making a smile spread on his lips. "Prove to me that you will make efforts this time, and I will prove to you that I very much care and feel for you even though you don't believe so."
"Oh," Harry mumbled with a shake of his head. "You need not to prove that to me, I was being a blind fool who was just hurt and insecure. I do believe you care for me but-"
"Just not as much as I did for Jon," Reina murmured in continuation of his sentence, bright eyes searching for his to hold gazes for a second. "Oh Harry," she whispered, before she tried to assure him but he looked away and stood up, hands slipping from hers. He was going to say the sentence himself, but when Reina said it he didn't realize how much more painful it was to hear it from her.
"It is...alright, Reina," Harry forced himself to say with extreme difficulty. He believed that she cared for him, but he was always reminded of Jon and how he felt he had to compete with him for her love.
"No, it's not-"
"I will be back soon," he interrupted her, and preventing her from assuring him and taking away his insecurity. "I need to return to my father before he sends his guards to drag me back. In the meantime, I'll fetch the servants to get you some food, and Jaide to keep you company until I return," he told her quietly, while she looked up at him with apologetic eyes.
Even though they somewhat made amends, things were going to be tense and awkward between them and Reina hated it. She knew a part of it was because Harry was now insecure with their relationship, and she was just going to have to show him that she did care for him a lot. Reina gazed at him quietly as he headed towards the door, and exited the room after shooting her one last glance.
The rest of Reina's day consisted of eating and resting. Harry strictly told his father not to barge in and question her because he wanted Reina to rest and heal more before they could have the conversation about the foreign ambushers again. Jaide didn't like Harry told Reina she would. Gemma found out about Reina's return and her injury, and purposefully kept Jaide away from Reina. Jaide didn't hear about Reina's return, as she was too busy pleasing Gemma and was occupied by her. Therefore, Reina was pretty much alone for the day, especially since Harry didn't return at any point like he said he would.
Fredric told Reina that he was busy with his father, discussing the ambush and increasing the security of the castle. Reina understood, and just assumed that he'd probably make it for dinner. However, after Reina visited the physician for him to check up on her, she was informed that Harry was to have dinner with the Styles family, without her. Reina asked Fredric to have dinner with her to keep her company but he was slightly appalled by the request, the fact that a princess wanted to have dinner with her bodyguard. Nonetheless, he agreed to stand by and talk to her because she felt lonely even though she's only been back in Siremeth for one day.
After dinner, Reina got ready for bed and then decided to take a look at the dragon eggs her and Harry had left in Siremeth. Her gaze drifted from the door to the right, falling upon the open chest of dragon eggs, with unlit, chunky candles sitting in the chest and around it. She felt a pang of sadness at the sight of them, remembering her poor Vaera all locked up in the dungeons.
She pushed those thoughts away briefly, and flipped the covers off of her. Her hand supported her abdomen when she felt a throb of pain when she moved, but she continued carefully swinging her legs off the bed to touch the floor. She slowly made her way towards the eggs, feeling an odd sensation just by looking at them. The sight of them made her feel better, so she knelt down in front of them, reaching into the chest and carrying the emerald egg with the bronze reflective sheen on the scales. She found comfort in the radiating warmth of it, precious life in her hands.
Reina slowly held it against her abdomen, almost hugging it to her and closing her eyes. She remembered when she did this with the egg that contained Vaera, foolishly pretending that the egg against her stomach mimicked a baby bump because Vaera was practically going to be her child. The warmth from the egg seeped through her clothes and into her bandaged wound.
She was reminded of the fear that arose inside of her today when she told Fredric that his father only wanted her alive because she was supposed to produce his heir. After having sex with Harry around three times, Reina realized that she still didn't show the signs of being pregnant. She worried that she was infertile, and that the King and Queen will find out and grant her and Harry and annulment.
She couldn't bear the thought of leaving Harry, or the thought that he would then be married off to another woman whom he'd make her his queen and have babies with. Reina felt that she was overthinking it and that she was probably just unlucky the first few times. 'But will his parents understand that?' was the question that bothered her. She then decided to put the egg back into the chest and head to bed. Her eyes drooped and exhaustion eventually took over her body, since she was still weak from the huge blood loss that occurred yesterday night.
Harry entered the bedchamber after a few minutes when it was dark with no candles alit. He saw Reina asleep, looking like a broken angel with her pale skin, mottled cheeks, dressed in her pure white night gown. He climbed onto the bed after he had changed, and crawled under the covers, sighing heavily as he settled down. He looked at Reina and felt guilt wash over him since he told her he would return to her, but he couldn't because his father wanted him by his side. He saw that she was already asleep, chest rising and falling lightly, eyes moving underneath the lids of her eyes.
"Reina, I am sorry I didn't come back to you," Harry whispered to her quietly, hand reaching out to hold hers, squeezing it. "I will make it up to you," he said, and he wasn't referring only to him not returning to her that day. He was referring to everything else he had done wrong.
"I promise, Little Dragon."
♕♔♕
❃ What did y'all think of this chapterrrrr?
❃ Y'all I can't, Reina and Jon are the purest, most precious things on this planet. I actually teared up writing that shiz.
❃ how do you feel about Harry and Reina now after the convo they had?
❃ do you think Harry will for sure change or will he fuck up again and they'll be back at square one ???
❃ anymore predictions for the ambushers with the gold masks? Hint: they're rlly important lmao.
Until we meet again...
thiø