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I believe that a song is the language of the soul. In so far as this book is concerned, I have added a few songs to enhance the heart of the story. I wish you will make the time to listen to them. Once again, t
hank you guys . . . A LOT!!! Please enjoy reading!!!
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My hands felt cold and clammy, my tummy's in knots . . . my heart felt like a drum . . . I could hardly breathe . . . !
My eyes caught the image in front of me . . . staring at the woman I hardly recognize myself, I just can't believe what I saw in the mirror.
"Are you really . . . this girl?" I whispered, asking the girl whose eyes were staring unblinkingly back at me.
Of course, I knew fully well I wouldn't get back an answer.
Rubbing my hands together, I tried to calm myself down . . . my mind switching outright to the event which would start in less than half an hour . . . I shivered at the thought.
"Come on Andrei! You can do it! You . can . do . it!" I admonished myself, whispering and repeating the words over and over like a mantra. I was glad that there was no one around to see how nervous I really was.
"Oh, God! Why did I ever had to agree to this in the first place?" I thought miserably, both my hands now tight-fisted at my sides.
But Sabina Isabel had been so excited when she learned that I got signed up as one of the usherettes in the inauguration of the newest hotel in the city. Her joy knew no bound.
Hyacinth and Angela, two of my three best friends had been hounding me like crazy since talk of an interview for ushettes went into fever pitch among the local girls, the inauguration mania hit my friends and signed me up!
I told them . . . emphatically, of course, that I wasn't interested, it wasn't my cup of tea!
Yet to my chagrin they submitted my name as replacement for the girl who backed out at the last minute.
Davey, one of our foursome was the newly appointed coordinator of the usherettes after the reshuffling. And, sure! He didn't take my NO for an answer.
"Andrei! Oh, Andrei!" She squealed enthusiastically. "I'm so excited for you! You deserved this, you deserve to have some fun!"
"What fun, Sabbi, hmm?" I said as I tried to quell her enthusiasm, myself not so amused with this latest development in my adult life.
"Your being an usherette . . . of course!" She admonished me like I was some dumb younger sibling!
"Uh huh! And that
isn't very amusing . . . if I need to remind you!" I retorted.
"Andrei . . . please!"
I looked straight into Sabbi's eyes, hoping to get some sympathy from her.
Instead, her wretched look just took me in the gut which now made a dent in my resolve.
"Surely, you won't be going there in your usual T-shirt and jeans with a matching hoodie! Oh my gosh! It's a seven-star hotel, Andrei . . . it's the event of the year and it's come to you like . . . in a silver platter, you know!!!" She rolled her eyes.
"Hmmm . . . I didn't ask for this . . . and you know me . . . "
"I know . . . I know my dearest sister!" She persisted.
"The very reason why I didn't want to do it in the first place, Sabbi," I gave out an exasperated sigh.
"Andrei!!!!!"
"I . told . you . . . "
"Please . . . please . . . please . . . ! You just can't really pass up this opportunily. And it's already been fixed, your name's now on the list, remember?"
"Hmm . . . you don't have to remind me that!!!" I lamely replied, trying to look adamant just for its own sake.
"Oh, no Andrei!!! Hyacinth and Angela have fought tooth and nails just to get you this vacant slot, I mean . . . not literally! And have you ever realized that many aspiring girls out there were looking forward to getting that spot? But it was given to you instead . . . " She insisted with her hands clasped at her chest and looking wistfully at me, now misty-eyed.
"It wasn't my fault, I didn't ask for it . . . "
"Sure . . . but personally, I'm not sorry that your friends got you into this," my sister's eyes pleaded, punching at my last wall of defence.
"Do you think this is some fancy job, huh?" I took to the settee just to avoid looking straight at her.
"Why ever not? You now get the chance to dress up like some famous celebrity! Though, as it is . . . you don't look bad yourself!" She planted herself in front of me, giving me a thorough once-over!
"Celebrity . . . my foot! You're such a dramatic queen, my dear little sister"
"I am not!!!"
"And you're making it sound like . . . I'm going on a date! Or. . . or . . . like I'm joining this event like it's a beauty pageant and I'm a beauty contestant," I gave out a dry chuckle, quickly closing my eyes, cringing at the thought.
"Look here, Andrei! Celebrity or not, when I say you . are . beautiful, I'm telling you this . . . because you are! Just believe me . . . you are!!!!! And . . . I want you to go out and dress up . . . really dress up for once!"
I had this feeling I'd end up saying yes even before our conversation is over.
"Sabbi . . . what I'd be doing there . . . and so with the rest of the girls, is to place a lei over the head of the guest that we're assigned to . . . and then guide them to their reserved seats, that's just it! It's that simple . . . and it's no big deal! I'd only be there for an hour or two . . . to work! "
"Yeah! Sure! Okay . . . I understand, I'm not a child, Andrei." She told me dismissingly.
"Nevertheless, my point here my dear sister is: this . affair . is . big . stuff !!! It's unlike the waitressing or the babysitting jobs you had when you were in school. Nor, is it like your present job as the assistant librarian . . . which is so boring! Nope!" She vigorously shook her head, emphasizing her letter p with an omph!
"Andrei please, look at me . . . "
I breathed out an exasperated sigh.
"Sabbi . . . " I came up to her and held her face tenderly. I tried to wipe a tear or two that started slipping down her cheeks. It's so like her when she's so wrapped up in whatever she wants.
"I'm just a simple person . . . you know, right! And I ain't good at socials . . . I avoided ocassions such as this, and I still do! You must understand that!" I said softly, hoping she'd see things my way this time.
Sabbi tried to open her mouth for another round of arguments, but I put a forefinger over her lips.
"You know very well that I'm not really comfortable being in large crowds, Sabbi. And . . . just thinking about it now . . . ? Gosh, it just gives me the creeps!" I explained to her, trying to shake off the feeling and sighing miserably at the same time.
"No buts Andrei . . ." Sabbi interrupted me, now sniffing.
Oh, goodness . . . here we go again! I thought helplessly.
"You've been working so hard all your life . . . well, not all the time, of course. Yeah, since Dad and Mom died . . . in that tragic accident . . . and then grandpa and grandma passing away quite soon after . . . " Her voice trailed momentarily with a catch.
Talking about our parents and grandparents was still so painful. And so we've made a conscious effort at avoiding this subject since then.
"I've known you all my life Andrei . . . I know that you've stuck to your priorities no matter what. You've placed yourself the last of these . . ." Sabbi tried hard to swallow the anguish in her voice.
Still . . . I felt my sister!
Somehow, I sensed the guilt in her voice, I was astounded at my sister's observations . . . I couldn't believe that the baby in the family is now grown up. I wasn't able to think of any retort nor was I able to make a good repartee this time.
"I knew you worked yourself two to three shifts most times . . . sending yourself through school while burying your pretty nose in your books and . . . got yourself a degree from the university," Sabbi's tears were now running down her cheeks, her breathing getting a bit harsh.
"Oh, snap!!! Hush, Sabbi . . . please. You'll get yourself sick . . ." I anxiously hugged my sister trying to calm her down.
My sister has asthma and I was scared of an attack for she looked so upset.
"You've got to listen, Andrei. Hear me out, please!" She insisted as she raised a hand.
"Sabbi . . . please . . . " I tried to stop her.
"No, Andrei . . . you must listen to me first! Alright?"
I could only nod my head, thinking that it was best that I know what she's been thinking all these years.
"It was you who took care of me Andrei, after. . . after . . . "
" . . . . they passed away . . . " I finished for her, short of a whisper, my words now in my throat.
"Yeah!" My sister whispered back, her tears just at the brim of her eyelids.
For a moment, a poignant silence enveloped us.
" . . . . you've provided my medical and school needs Andrei, there was no one else. I have witnessed your struggles . . . the sacrifices you've made for the family . . . for me! I would know . . . for I only got you . . . .no one was there for us . . . except . . . us!" Sabbi resumed talking, she could be stubborn when she really wants to.
I was tongue-tied at this.
"You've been grieving for so long, Andrei! I would know, you know! I loved and miss them, too!" She quickly tried to wipe away the tears that were again, at the edge of her eyes.
"And right now . . . all I want . . . is for you to enjoy and have some fun . . . I want you to have a life, Andrei!"
"But you're my life Sabbi! You're my family!" I insisted, finding my tongue once again.
"Oh, don't be so vague! You've always been there for me . . . and, yeah, I've never heard you utter a word of complaint. You never, ever! You're too serious . . . in most everything you do, you know. I really missed my sister who was fun to be with when I was quite little." She took a long, deep breath.
"I never said anything before, you know. I just couldn't rock the boat, so to say, between the two of us which was the most I could do for you, I guess."
"And I don't want you to think I'm ungrateful for all the things you've done for me. I love you for being the elder sister that you are to me, the mother that you've become to me."
"Ohh, Sabbi! And I love you too, sweetheart!" I hugged her, I can't help becoming emotional this time, and misty-eyed as well.
"Please, Andrei . . . if you don't want to do it for yourself . . . will you do it for me, then . . . .?" Sabbi implored, looking hopefully at me with puppy teary eyes that had always tugged at my heart.
I closed my eyes as her words slowly pierced my heart. Everything that my sister had been telling me has overwhelmed me. It revealed a new side of my sister, it showed a mature Sabbi in more ways than I could remember.
"So all you've gotta do is make yourself beautiful, be there the entire evening . . . and have fun, for once! With trembling voice Sabbi asked me.
"Alright! Allriiiighhtt! It looks like you've already made my decision for me, huh!" I answered her sarcastically but I couldn't help my smile when Sabbi immediately gave me a tight hug. "I love you Andrei, so very much! It's just . . .it's just that . . . I want you to be happy . . . again!"
"Oh, I love you more, Sabbi!" I hugged my sister, trying to get a grip of myself.
"And please Sabbi . . ." I lifted her chin up as I looked at her in the eyes. "We need to clear this between us, okay?"
She just gave me her large two eyes, now looking questioningly at me.
"I want you to understand . . . that you shouldn't be feeling guilty about how things were, or had been, you know . . . I did what I did . . . and made a promise to myself that I would never look back . . . whatever I did, I did it because we only had each other. Always keep that in mind . . . and in your heart that looking after you was never a burden but a joy . . . because I love you my dear sister!"
"Of course!" Sabbi nodded her head at this.
"And I'm not done yet . . . okay!" I placed a finger over her mouth as she tried to open it.
"I knew I can't replace Mom's place in your life. And Dad's, of course. So I tried to be the best older sister you've ever had. And . . . our relationship is the most important thing to me in the world, you are my family. So, please . . . do not feel guilty that I took care of you, alright?"
"Yeah . . . okay . . . I guess so!" Sabbi said and nodded her head at the same time.
I got to understand my sister a little better since then. The unexpected drama brought out her deep sentiments and worries . . . and somehow curing the pigheaded side of me. And the crying, yeah . . . it served as a cleanser to both of us.
"You're really incorrigible! Do you know that?" I half-heartedly admonished her but my sister knows me so well to get intimidated.
I smiled, remembering my sister as I pulled myself together.
And . . . oh, my three BFFs! They've appointed themselves as my 'fairy godmothers', they told me.
"Bestie, you must let us . . . your best friends indulge ourselves in this mission . . . Operation: Cinderella! And, yeah! We guarantee you . . . this will be your moment . . . you will have the most fabulous fun and the happiest time ever in your life!"
Their enthusiasm was so infectious that despite my sceptism, I had given them my permission to do whatever they've been planning to make me 'simply beautiful'! I honestly doubted my decision but . . . well, I trusted my friends enough to give in to their whim.
They dragged me to shops, and boutiques and malls just to find the right dress for me . . . because I, for one am a bit picky one when it comes to dresses.
"I think you should also try this one bestie . . ." Hyacinth gave me another piece . . . a lacy black cocktail dress.
"I hope this will be the one . . . because I'm just so tired! I've been putting on tons of dresses the whole morning, my feet are aching."
"C'mon, Andrea Nicole. Be a good sport because all of us are tired."
"Fine!" I grumbled as I slowly dragged my feet to one of the booths.
"Okey dokey friend." I replied.
Then, from my left periphery I saw Davey and Angela coming our way with more dresses on their arms.
"Uh oh! Please tell them Hyney . . . I got this one." I told Hyacinth as I hurried inside a booth.
When I came out to present myself for their inspection, I expected another big 'NO' from them.
All the three of them seemed to be ogling at me. No, they were dissecting me like I was laboratory rat! And not a word came out of their mouths.
"What . . . now . . . ???"
"OMG! Andrea Nicole! You look stunning! That dress really becomes you!" Davey sounded so ecstatic.
Now, the three of them were babbling all of a sudden.
"Yayyy! I found that dress, it'simply is right!" Hyacinth clapped her hands with more relief than glee!
"Oh, Andrei . . . you just look so gorgeous . . . so elegant . . . so glamorous in that dress, girl!" Angela was beside herself.
"Okay! I got this! I got this!" I raised both my hands up, shying away from all their torturous praises which grated in my ears and I hastily scuttled back into the booth.
I came out in my own my t-shirt and jeans. "Come on, let me have that dress bestie." Davey said, reaching out for the dress. "This is on me! It's my gift to you for being so patient with us." He chuckled as he went to the cashier.
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Hey, guys! If you've come this far, thank you so much for reading.
If you have some comments and/or suggestions, please let me know. I really would welcome them . . . so I would know how and what to improve, I really do.
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Got a song below . . . that I thought might give you a glimpse of Ashton. Hope you'd like it.
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Thankyou and thankyou so very much!!!!
Till next chapter. . . ?
God Bless!!!
marly 02.28.2018