Bucky holds your hair back out of your face and rubs your back soothingly as you crouch over the toilet trying to get yourself back together. This is the third time tonight that you've thrown up and your absolutely exhausted.
Bucky doesn't need to get up, but he always does no matter how quiet you try to be.
"I'm sorry to do this to you again Buck." You gasp as you lean back and rest the back of your head against his chest where the two of you now sit on the bathroom floor.
"It's okay. It's the least I can do for you with what you're going through." He mumbles tiredly.
"Yeah but it's not your fault." You point out. "You shouldn't have to do this, it's affecting your sleep, your school, your work, even your social life. Go back to bed and get some rest. I'm okay."
"You're the one that needs some rest if anything doll!" He chuckles. "Do you want me to tell the school that you've got the flu again?"
"No no, that'll seem too suspicious, we said I had the flu just last week on that day I was real bad. I'm okay, I'll come to school today." You huff.
"You sure?" He frowns and looks down at you.
"Mhm." You nod. "Now go back to bed."
"Okay, but just take it easy." He says wearily.
----
"What are we going to tell everyone?" You exclaim as you pace the room.
"I don't know?" Bucky says frantically back and runs a hand through his hair from where he sits on the couch. "Can't you just keep hiding it?"
"No! It's getting too big to hide under baggy jersey or floaty dresses now!" You say. "See?"
You turn sideways and pull at your dress so that it goes tight around your middle, showing off the small bump that you are now starting to grow.
"I've been told twice now by my friends that I'm looking like I've gained weight or gotten fat." You say sadly.
"Okay, okay, first of all you are not fat." Bucky says soothingly as he stands up and walks towards you, placing his hands on your belly. "You are pregnant, that's a pretty decent excuse if you ask me." He chuckles with a smile. "And secondly I'll cover for you. Say that you got a deathly bad case of pneumonia. No one will want to come visit you and risk getting sick. And besides, schools only in for another month and then we'll be done so you can just pretend to be sick for the rest of the year. It'll make sense, these last few months you've supposedly been pretty crook anyway so I guess it kind of wouldn't seem that strange."
"Thank you Buck." You sigh and hug him. "For everything."
"It's okay doll." He sighs and kisses the top of your head while rubbing your back. "Anything for you."
----
There wasn't even a knock on the door. You weren't expecting him. Yet here you are, standing in shock in the middle of Bucky's apartment while Steve just stares at your protruding belly with his jaw dropped open.
Bucky stands off to the side and runs a hand down his face in stress.
"W-what is happening?" Steve says cautiously.
"Steve, please don't freak." You say sheepishly.
"How can I not freak right now?!" He exclaims.
"Alright just calm down and let us explain." Bucky finally butts in. "But first, haven't you ever heard of knocking?"
"Well I didn't think to when it never used to be a problem!" Steve says exasperatedly.
"Good point." Bucky shrugs.
"Now please tell me what's going on before I jump to conclusions." Steve says, never taking his eyes off of your stomach as his brow creases into a frown.
"Well, you know how Jake broke up with me?" You start wearily.
"Yes..." He says suspiciously.
"It wasn't because I cheated on him like he told everyone. It's because he got me pregnant." You explain.
"Oh my god." Steve gasps. "Seriously?"
"What do you think?" You deadpan and point to your tummy.
"Oh, right." He mumbles and blushes.
"So I've kinda just been hiding out here." You continue.
"I see." He says slowly and nods but he still looks confused.
"Please don't tell anyone." You beg. "No one can know."
"I won't." He assures you. "But what's gonna happen later? I mean you can't hide in here forever."
"We'll figure that out when it comes to it." Bucky sighs.
----
"Buck I've been thinking." You say as you lay on the couch lazily.
"Oh dear god that can't be a good thing." He teases and turns around from where he is in the kitchen and pokes out his tongue.
"Hey!" You laugh.
"I'm sorry doll. What were you saying?" He chuckles.
"I was wondering if you wanted to be the god father." You say sheepishly and look down at your stomach embarrassed and place a hand on it.
It's getting pretty big now. You're still not due for quite a while but already you're bigger than you ever thought that you could get. You get lost in thought and stroke your belly absent mindedly.
"Seriously?" Bucky suddenly says softly, breaking you from your trance and walking over to you in a rush.
He kneels down beside you and puts a hand on your stomach. Even though you two aren't together and even though he isn't the father you two still do that kind of thing without minding because you're just that close.
"Yes. You've done so much for me and this kid already and it hasn't even been born yet. You've put up with so much crap from me and all the drama of this whole thing. You've stuck up for me and stood up for me. There's no one else I'd want it to be." You smile.
His whole face lights up at this and he breaks into an uncontainable smile.
"I'd love to." He sighs contently.
Just then you feel butterflies in your stomach. The baby's kicking. Bucky gasps when he feels it too.
"I think they agree on the idea too." You chuckle.
----
You knock on Bucky's bedroom door quietly.
"Come in." You here a muffled voice.
You open the door and stand there hesitantly, looking at him as he lies on the bed reading a book.
"What is it doll?" He asks as he puts down the book and looks at you.
But then he sees the tears painting your cheeks.
You don't know what happened. One minute you were fine and then the next thing you knew you got thinking about things and then you were just bawling your eyes out. Stupid pregnant hormones.
"Aw doll, what's wrong? Come 'ere." He sighs sadly and sits up so that you can come sit with him.
Without hesitation you waddle over to his bed and collapse into his arms. It's a little awkward for him to hold you now because you're so large but somehow he makes it work.
"What's wrong?" He whispers.
"I can't do this Buck." You sob as you curl up in his lap as best you can.
"What do you mean?" He frowns and hugs you tight.
"Steve was right. I can't hide this forever. People are going to find out. Not only that but I've ruined your life and I'm never going to have a normal life again either. I don't know anything about what to do or how to care for a child. The kid's probably going to have a shitty life. What if something goes wrong? What if I literally can't do this?" You cry.
"Hey hey, shh. It's okay. You're going to be fine. You have not ruined my life. Getting to spend time with you has made it better and I can't wait to look after this kid and raise it like my own. What you're feeling is just nerves. Everyone, every new mother gets them. But with a mother like you this baby is going to have the best life that it possibly can. You're going to be brilliant. Nothing is going to go wrong. I'll make sure of it and I'll look after you. As for people finding out, that is just something that we are going to have to deal with. Sometimes life throws things at people that they don't want or don't expect but you just have to make the best out of it. You have been given this amazing gift and you are so lucky and if anyone tries to tell you otherwise I will stand by you and defend you the whole way." Bucky says soothingly and softly.
You look up at him with teary eyes and he smiles as he brushes the tears from your cheeks.
"Thank you Buck." You croak.
What happens next, you don't know what you're thinking. You're just so upset and confused and scared that you just want to feel loved.
So you lean up and press your lips to his in a fervent kiss. And it only becomes more passionate. He shifts you so that you're sitting in his lap and while his hands go and roam up and down your sides, your hands go to his hair and tangle in his soft short curls. You soak in his taste and deepen the kiss further.
Eventually when you have to break away for air he lays you down carefully and hovers over you, his muscular abs pressed slightly against your big, rounded belly looking deep into your eyes and panting for breath before smashing your lips back together and reconnecting his lips to yours in a bruising kiss.
At some point you stop kissing and start cuddling and the next thing you know you wake up with your head buried in the crook of his neck, your arms wrapped tightly around his back and his the same with yours along with your guys legs tangled together.
You feel him stir beneath you and press a kiss to your forehead. All you can do is lay there frozen in shock and think about what just happened.
You two have never done anything like that before. You've always just been friends. You just hope it doesn't make things awkward between you guys.
----
"Hey how've you been?" Bucky asks as you shuffle out of your room to greet him now that he's home for work one afternoon.
"Okay." You sigh. "Tired and a little crampy."
"Crampy?" He spins around frowning. "Are you sure your alright?".
"Yeah it's normal. It's just discomfort now that I'm so close." You shrug.
He sighs as he looks you up and down, frowning in concern with his hands on his hips.
"Listen, I've been meaning to talk to you about the other day." He says with a guilty look on his face.
Oh god. Here it comes. Your hope that things wouldn't get awkward was in vain because they certainly did get awkward. Very awkward.
"Look, it wasn't your fault. I started it." You assure him and wave it off dismissively, really not in the mood to talk about it at the moment.
"But what I wanted to say was that if you don't want it to change anything between us I'm cool with that. I mean, I'd totally be into giving us a try in that way doll, but if you don't want to I totally understand. You've got a lot of stuff on your plate at the moment and I respect that." He says quietly and rubs at the back of his neck, a light pink blush coating his cheeks.
"Oh god." You gasp, completely distracted from what Bucky just said by the feeling of warm water between your legs.
"What?" He says nervously. "Did I say something wrong?"
"No!" You whimper as you hunch over and clutch your massive belly. "I think my water just broke."