That was when I saw him. That was when I saw them. Just like that a dagger of betrayal found its way to the center of my heart.
Calum was laughing, standing across from Luke. Luke wasn't alone though. A tall Asian girl, with long shiny hair swinging down her back and a tight black dress showing off her model like figure, had her arms wrapped around Luke's waist. He was looking at Calum while her eyes were glued to his face which was shining in the moonlight. Just as it had done the night before. I must've gasped, or perhaps I squeaked, because Michael began to laugh. Not a normal laugh, more like a punch in the heart, I knew it laugh.
"I knew you were with him last night," his eyes followed mine as we watched the girl reach up to give Luke a kiss on the cheek. My heart sinking into its hidden caverns, my eyes stinging in the dry air.
"I don't know what you are talking about," I mutter, forcing myself to look away from the crime scene.
"Step off it, I can see right through you two. I watched Luke change like ten times, and he kept asking me random shit about what girls like to eat for dinner. I'm not fucking stupid, I've been his friend for years," his words contradicted my feelings. If Luke had been so invested in our date, if he had been as nervous as I was, then why was I watching him spend his Saturday night with some other girl? Some girl who obviously had no concept of personal space.
"You knew he was going to be here didn't you? Did you know he would be with her?" I tried to hold myself together. Michael nodded, looking out into the distance. Giving me no explanation of Luke's arm wrapped around the girl's back. No explanation of Calum pushing the two closer together.
The girl reached up and gave Luke a kiss on the lips. It was quick, but so was the jab in my heart. I guess a kiss wasn't as special as he had led on. I guess the date had went a lot better in my mind than his. Part of me wasn't surprised as I looked at her. She was gorgeous, earning envious looks from each girl passing by. It's not like I could compete with that anyway. Did I truly, honestly, believe I had a chance with someone like Luke in the first place?
She pulled away smiling, Calum clapping Luke on the back before going over to greet Ashton. As much as I wanted to look away, to act as if the images before me were a figment of my imagination, I couldn't help but stare. That was when he saw me. His eyes widened, taking in my "party look". A smile began to spread across his face, I could feel myself getting sucked into it. I could feel myself falling for what couldn't be mine. He was about to smile at me, about to, but then she decided to graze her hands across his jaw line, turning his face towards her own. My heart dropped, along with the cup of water I had been grasping too tightly. I shot up, Michael went to grab me, but I shook him away. I didn't bother to look back at Luke, or Michael, or any of them. I just needed to get out.
I felt my feet carrying me towards the car. My mind was a blur, not registering Ashton shouting my name. I failed to notice the whistling guys who watched me storm through the crowded house. I was too deep in thought to realize maybe I was overreacting. Maybe I had no right to say she stole him from me if he was never mine to begin with.
Just like that the walls I never knew I had come crashing down, the remnants laying at my feet. At that moment it felt as if my heart had been betrayed by something I never had.
I stormed to the end of the street where we had parked, tugging on the door with hope of an escape. I rested my head against the locked door, my hair and skirt lightly blowing in the breeze that froze me to my core. I heard heavy footsteps a few cars down, approaching in the distance.
"I will talk to her, she is my best friend, and quite frankly it seems like I'm the only one who doesn't know what the hell is going on here," I heard Ashton growl without lifting my head. His Australian accent thicker than ever behind his anger. They were far enough away where they couldn't see me behind the car. Who they were, well I wasn't quite sure yet. I was afraid if I looked up, they would notice me.
"Let me talk to her, this is my fault," I heard Luke's low voice plead.
"She needs a real friend right now," Michael's whisper was carried by the wind, "and I owe her answers"
"Yeah, she does, and that is obviously not you. I'm her only real friend right now," Ashton began to walk towards the car. His footsteps stopped abruptly. "Luke, get your hands off me," he threatened.
"Please, just let me explain," I might not have been able to see Luke, but I could picture his pleading eyes digging into Ashton's soft heart. I internally wished Ashton would let him explain. Though the truth would probably increase the pain I shouldn't be feeling in the first place.
"No," Ashton barked, to my surprise. "Listen, I don't know what you two did, and I don't really care. All I know is that for some fucking reason, my best friend is somewhere out here hurt because of you. Just go."
Luke and Michael must have backed away, I would be surprised if they didn't. A pair of footsteps approached the car, while the others faded away in the distance.
"Madds?" I head Ashton whisper, walking around to the other side of my wall. He grazed his fingers lightly over my back. I lifted my head to meet his concerned eyes. I could see a thin layer of drunkenness to them, but whatever had happened in the last few minutes seemed to have sobered him up enough. "Come here," he held out his arms, beckoning for me.
I molded into his warm embrace, my head against his chest. He didn't ask me to what happened, or what was wrong. He simply gave me a place to feel weightless, to feel secure, even if it was only for a few moments.
"I can't drive you home," he whispered, brushing my hair back after a few minutes of silence. I nodded my head, I knew he would take me wherever I needed to go, but he had been having fun while I was busy ruining the night.
"I'll call my sister," I pulled out my phone. I was grateful that he didn't ask about her, he knew me well enough to know I wasn't up for chatting right now. He kept a tight hold around me as I dialed my sister's number, grateful once again for her surprise home visit.
"Adley," I nearly whisper after she answers on the third ring.
"Madeline, how is Jonah's house?" she asked in an all too proper way. She must be with my mother, I had told my mom that I would be with Jonah tonight.
"I need to get picked up," I whisper, biting my lip.
"Sounds like you're getting a lot of work done," I can hear her voice straining to stay leveled, "I'm out with mom. We should be home around twelve." I wish I could have a real conversation with her right now.
I check the time, I have an hour to get home before my mother notices anything. I tried to think of who else I could call considering nobody here was of help.
"See you at home if you are still awake when we get back. Tell Jonah I said hello," she covered for me. I sighed, hanging up. Ashton looked at me questioningly, I just shook my head, not sure who to call. I guess I could try Jonah, as much as I didn't want to bother him this late.
"I'm going to try Jonah," I sigh. Ashton tightened his grip on me, groaning. Luckily he didn't push his protest any further, I wasn't in the mood.
"Maddie?" he answers on the first ring.
"Hey, listen, I'm sorry to bother you this late, but could you please pick me up," I failed to hide the panic in my voice.
"Yeah, of course, where are you?" his concern prominent.
"I'm- at a party," defeat consumed my voice. I was embarrassed to admit any of this to Jonah.
"Just give me the address and I will be there as soon as I can," he offered with no trace of judgment in his voice. For that I was grateful. I told him my whereabouts, before hanging up. Putting my head in my hands I sighed in defeat. Why were my feelings so strong about someone I barely knew?
Ashton lifted my hands from my face, turning me to look at him.
"It's okay," he whispered, "I'm not going to ask you what happened until you're ready, but just tell me one thing please. Who did this to you?" I could see his distraught face. I knew him well enough to know he was going through his brain to see if it was anything he did. I just shook my head, not ready to tell him. Not ready to admit it. He shook his head, already getting down on himself, "This is my fault, I should have stayed with you the whole time. I could have stopped this. I'm sorry I wasn't there, and now I can't even take you home," he pulled at his hair.
"Ashton, there was nothing you could have done," I manage to get out, "Please don't beat up on yourself. Please just see that you are the only person I need right now," I croak, wishing I could say more. If only I could make him realize how perfect he was to me. He was in the dark with no clue of what was the reason for my stumble.
He just pulled me in for a hug, not pushing any further. We stood like that until I heard the faint hum of Jonah's car pull up next to us. Ashton let go of me, as Jonah got out of his car. He eyed up Ashton's size, a whole lot broader than his lanky, nerd self.
"Were you the one that did this to her?" Jonah mustered up the courage to ask, attempting to hold his ground before us. I covered my giggles in my sleeve.
"No, she won't tell me who. Do you really think I would hurt her?" Ashton looked a bit offended, his voice high. Jonah could see the sincerity in his eyes, backing away. Although, he probably would have backed away anyway. "Thanks for picking her up, just make sure she gets home safe," Ashton gave me a small smile. I know it was hard for him to see Jonah being the one to save the day. He already compared himself to my other friends so much. I gave Ashton one more hug, lingering in his arms before turning away.
"Don't worry, I will," Jonah mumbled before opening the passenger door for me. I gave a small wave to Ashton before we drove away.
I sat quietly alongside Jonah. He wasn't used to upset girls and their sporadic hormones. He was watching me the way he observed his science labs, with caution and confusion. He attempted to make small talk every now and then, commenting on the night sky, or a song on the radio. I tried my best to reassure him he was helping. He was being so generous, the last thing I wanted him to feel was uncomfortable or guilty. I was relieved, however, when we finally pulled into my driveway.
"Thanks again, for everything," I give him a quick hug, making him blush.
"You know I'm always here for you," He smiled shyly, "You look nice by the way." He pushed his glasses up, his eyes squinted as they every time he is contemplating his next move. He stuttered a few times before managing to speak, "Just so you know, any boy who is stupid enough to mistreat someone as pure and lovely as you, doesn't deserve you."
His words hung there for a moment, finding their way to my cowering heart. Bringing it back to the surface.
"Thanks Jonah, that is sweet," I give him a weak smile, before getting out. As he pulled away I wish I had said more. I wish I had told him how I wish his words were true. I wish I could push away my feelings. I wish I could believe I deserved more.
I washed of my layers of makeup, watching the night swirl down the drain with the blur of colors. I put on my comfy shorts and hoodie, lying in bed, admitting defeat as I stared at the ceiling.
Now it was just me against myself. My doubt against my lacking optimism. My insecurities against the shard of confidence that remained. Every part of me was at war, every part of me felt like it was losing. Just as I was about to surrender to my thoughts and escape the waging wars with my dreams in sleep, I heard the doorbell ring.
It couldn't have been my mother and sister, it was only 11:40, plus they would have just come in through the garage. My heart crawled back into its hiding place, my feet carrying me mindlessly to the front door. My guards were down as I failed to look outside before I opened the door.
The coldness of the night came gushing in, matching the temperature of my frozen heart. My breath stopped short when I saw who had come to visit. The unexpected visitor I was not ready to face just yet.
Wow over 1,000 reads! I love you guys so much, and I am so glad you are enjoying this as much as I am. I am so happy right now (: Thank you so much for all of your kind feedback and all of the reads!
Next chapter goal is the same as last time! 100 reads or 10 (of your) comments on chapter 8!
Thanks again, I love you guys!
-Maddie