Stephanie - Six Months Later
"Only very young babies (or babies with a condition linked to being born prematurely) are treated in the NICU — they're usually infants who haven't gone home from the hospital yet after being born. How long they'll stay in the unit depends on the severity of their condition."
I yawned.
Ang boring naman kasi ng discussion na ito eh, tsaka our teacher already taught us this before.
Napahawak nalang ako sa tiyan ko, sana kapag inilabas ko ang magiging anak ko, maging healthy siya.
I am six months pregnant, with Sam's baby. Nung gabing yun, sobrang nalasing ako, nalasing rin siya. And when I woke up, we were in bed, together, cuddling, naked.
I didn't bother to ask what happened, obvious naman. We tried to forget about it, but then I found out that I was pregnant, Two Baby Peanuts has been conceived, not one, two.
Lawrenz was the first person to notice that something changed about me. I was always complaining kasi tuwing magka-skype kami, tapos lagi ako nalang akong kumakain, tumaba nga daw ako. Hindi ko siya kinausap ng isang araw because of that, the next day naman, may natanggap akong chocolates galing sa kanya. Hahaha.
Nung una, akala ko may trangkaso lang ako or something. But then he remembered about my night with Sam, I told him. I tell him everything, and vice versa. I knew he was hurt, naramdaman ko naman eh. Pero the first thing he said after not talking for five minutes was; "naunahan pa ako ng ungas na yun!"
He told me to take a pregnancy test just to be sure, I didn't listen to him, pero I did but one, after a week nga lang.
I was chatting with Lawrenz when I took it, kulang na nga lang umihi ako sa harapan niya.
Naiyak nga ako nung malaman ko yung resulta eh. I didn't know how to feel, natatakot ako but I was still really happy.
The first thing I did was go to my school, I told them about my condition and they were nice enough to let me continue my studies.
"Ano? Itatago mo sa ama ng mga anak mo na siya ang tatay nila?"
"Lawrenz..."
"Stephanie, you're being unfair to Sam, and to the babies."
"I don't know how to tell him! You tell him! Uwi ka na dito!"
He chuckled, "baby I would love to, pero madami pa akong kailangang asikasuhin dito."
I rolled my eyes, "ano ba yan, anong klaseng boyfriend ka ah!"
Tuluyan na nga siyang natawa, "umuwi naman ako jan para tanungin ka ng maayos ah!"
"Tatlong araw ka lang dito oy!"
I laughed as I recalled the memory, I had to attend a group discussion for our class, and while we were in the middle of a talk, he suddenly appeared in the monitor, nagulat pa nga ako eh, pero napangiti na rin ako, he sang a song, Every Breathe You Take. Hahaha.
At nung dumating na sa last part ng song, he appeared in front of all of us.
"It'd be unfair if I asked you to be my girlfriend online."
"Lawrenz..."
"Shh, let me talk. Stephanie Leigh, you are, without a doubt, the most amazing woman I have ever met. You never cease to amaze me, I love you so much, and if you give me a chance, I will continue to prove my love to you every single day, will you be my girlfriend?"
I blinked back my tears, kaloka 'tong lalaking 'to.
"Thank you for the grand gesture Renz, pero you didn't have to do this. I already said yes to you, exactly one month ago. Hindi mo ba naaalala? Sabi mo pa nga, sagutin na kita, and I told you, oo na! Sige na, tayo na."
Nanlaki yung mata niya, "seryoso?!"
Natawa mga kaklase ko, including me. But instead of answering him, I just hugged my wide-eyed boyfriend, "I love you too, thank you for waiting for me." I whispered.
"Hoy! Babaeng mataba! Nakikinig ka ba?"
Sumimangot ako, "so mataba na ako ngayon hah?!"
He laughed, "maganda ka pa rin naman."
"Che!"
"Hahaha, sorry na po, Miss. Ganito nalang, how about I make you an offer?"
"What kind of offer?"
"If you tell Sam, I will do my best to come back there as quickly as possible."
Nagulat ako agad, pero dali daling kinuha ang susi at wallet, "san ka pupunta?!"
Kinuha ko yung ultrasound picture na ibinigay sa akin ng ob ko at ipinakita ko yun kay Lawrenz.
"I'm gonna go tell Sam right now. Bye! Love you!"
I didn't bother shutting my laptop down. All I heard was his laughter before I shut the door.
Wala pang ten minutes ay nakarating na ako sa dati naming subdivision.
"Stephanie? Ang aga aga pa, anong ginagawa mo dito?" gulat na sabi ni Manang ng buksan niya ang gate para papasukin ako.
"Ah? Ha-ha, Manag, si Sam po?"
"Nasa taas anak, tulog pa."
"Manang, ikwento ko nalang po sa inyo mamaya, akyatin ko na muna si Sam."
Tinignan lang ako ni Manang, puno ng pagtataka ang mukha, "sige? Ipaghahanda ko lang kayo ng almusal niyo."
I ran up to his room as fast as I could.
He's still sleeping pero I couldn't wait til' he woke up.
"RISE AND SHINE DADDY SAM!!!" I screamed as loud as I could.
He immediately sat up straight, saw me, and glared.
"YOU!"
Nanlilisik ang mga mata niya habang tumitingin sa akin.
"Shh! Don't get mad, the babies will be stressed."
He looked confused, "what are you???"
"Congratulations Mr. Villafuerte, magiging Tatay ka na!"
He looked even more confused.
"Are you high?!" he said, getting up to put a shirt on.
"No. Aisha! I should've explained this clearer. Remember that night? Well, something was conceived, not just something, two somethings."
"Nagbibiro ka ba?"
"Gago! Mukha ba akong nagbibiro?" binuksan ko yung wallet ko para ilabos yung picture, "here."
"Holy shit." Sam said in a whisper.
I nodded, agreeing. "Shit talaga."
Here I am today, pregnant and still beautiful. Hahaha! Lawrenz fulfilled his promise, he'll be home in a few days, hopefully. Kung hindi, ako na mismo pupunta dun para hilain siya pabalik dito.
Sam, on the other hand, has played the role of a Dad quite well. He's been really good to me. He checks on my every day, pag uwi ko sa bahay, kailangan tatawag ako agad sa kanya, or else siya ang tatawag sa akin. He'll come over after work para alamin kung nakakain na ba ako, minsan may dala siyang pagkain from somewhere. When I have nothing else to do, I'll call him para pumunta dito, manunuod lang kami ng TV or go watch a movie sa sinehan.
He helps me with my homework as well, kaya hindi talaga ako nafi-fail. Minsan nga, siya na talaga ang gumagawa ng homework ko.
Lawrenz and Sam are okay now, minsan nga may sarili na silang mundo habang nag uusap, pinapaalis pa ako sa kusina.
Minsan, binibiro nila ako. Ang taba ko na daw, tumaba rin naman ako ng konti kasi. Pero sila rin ang nag so-sorry sa huli, di ko na kasi pinapansin eh. Hahaha!
Pero minsan rin, binibiro namin si Sam dahil sa ginawa niya nung malaman niya na buntis ako.
"Seryoso ka Sam?"
Paano naman kasi, nang malaman niya na buntis nga ako tumakbo siya palabas ng bahay dala dala ang wallet niya.
Pagbalik naman niya, may dala dala siyang bag, hindi niya man lang pinansin si Manang at hinila ako papunta sa kwarto.
"Oh." inabot niya ang bag sa akin
"Anong gagawin ko dito?"
He grabbed the bag back at ibinuhos ang laman ng plastic.
Pregnancy tests. Iba't ibang brands ng pregnancy test.
"Walang tiwala Sam?"
"No! I just want to see for myself."
"Gusto mong umihi ako sa harap mo?"
He stared me down, natakot naman ako bigla.
"Oh eto na po, papasok na ng bannyo."
Kinuha ko lahat nung pregnancy tests, pero lima yung iniihan ko.
After I did my business, I watched my hands and went out, I purposely did not dry my hands.
Nilapag ko yung mga tests sa mesa, nilapitan ko si Sam, hands still wet at pinunas ang kamay ko sa shirt niya.
The look on his face. P R I C E L E S S!
HAHAHA!
Pero siyempre, puro positive naman yung resulta ng tests. I think he was happy, pero ewan ko. We talked about it for a while, the future of our babies. At first he insisted that we marry again, pero I told him no.
Sa totoo lang, mas nakahinga ako ng maluwag nung nag hiwalay kami eh.
I was able to love myself, and I was able to love again.
When I left that house, iniwan ko na rin lahat ng sakit at sama ng loob. Pati yung pagmamahal ko kay Sam.
I reassured him that our kids will understand, as long as we let them understand.
Sometimes, I ask myself, minahal ko ba talaga si Sam, o minahal ko lang ba yung thought na baka isang araw mamahalin niya rin ako.
But then I look at him, happy and smiling, when I see him like that, I know na minahal ko nga talaga siya.
I still love him now, pero iba na talaga eh. Iba yung pakiramdam.
The feeling that I felt before tuwing naiisip ko si Sam,
I feel that same feeling everytime I see and speak to Lawrenz.
I've fallen in love with him.
I've fallen in love with my teacher, again.
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*Revised