“Dad, I’m gay.” I said as I close my eyes, getting ready for his harsh words. I’ve prepared myself for this, I’m ready to hear all the cursing, and I even prepared my own bank account because I know he will disown me. It’s taking him too long to answer though; I slightly open one of my eyes to look at him. Is he smiling? “Dad, please just say that you’re going to disown me.” I said, getting more tensed just by looking at his smile.
“What are you saying? I won’t disown you, I’m really happy that I have a daughter now!” he said gleamingly.
“Huh?” I know my father is a nice father, but he is strict when it comes to the things that will ruin his reputation, and what I expect is that he will beat me up into death or just simply disown me. But something seems wrong. “I’m dreaming right?” I ask him.
“No, I’m really happy with your decision son, wait I mean daughter of course! This house feels so lonely when your mom died few years ago, and we only had four sons. I was hoping for a girl child, but we weren’t blessed with a girl! So if you think that you are a girl inside then there must be something wrong with what I’ve prayed for, but nothing big for me. So you want to shop for your dress?”
“Wa-wait. What the hell is going on dad? Are you nuts? You are so strict when it comes to your name, but you don’t have problem on having a gay son? And you are even asking me to buy my own dress?” I said, my mind was already cracked up. This wass so far away from what I expected he will do, yeah it seems better, but something seems so wrong!
“No, I don’t have anything against the gay people specially if it’s my own daughter, you must know that Carla.” He said with a huge convincing smile in his face.
“What the f*ck dad? I’m still a son, and most of all I still want to be called by my real name. It’s Carl, not Carla okay?”
“No, no, no! I want to spoil my only daughter; you can’t stop me from doing that. I’m still your father so I have the right to treat you way better than the other. And I will be calling your brothers, because we’ll be having a party later this night! So here’s some cash to buy your dress, I want you to look dazzling tonight honey.” He said as he handed me a couple of boxes, and walked out of the room. This is really getting awkward. If only I knew that this was coming, I should’ve admit it long time ago!
I really smell something fishy about my father; I just hope that he isn’t up to something. But I wasn’t able to fully explain what type of gay I was yet; I think he thought that I wanted to look like a girl, but no. I’m bisexual, not what he had thought.
I’m already in the mall, looking for some fine tuxedo to wear for the party. I’m sure my father isn’t kidding; he will really throw a party whenever he wants to. Well we’re kind of rich, but unlike my brothers I wasn’t blinded by wealth.
This silver tuxedo looks good, it has some simple designs on it that made it look quite delicate. I picked it up but someone seems to be pulling at it too, I raise my chin upwards to look if someone was really pulling it.
“Please, just let it go. I’m a busy man and I have to be in an important occasion, way better than where you are going. I don’t want to make an argument out of this.” He said coldly like icebergs in Antarctica that made my mouth hung open.
“Seriously, you’re already making an argument. You could just ask me to give it to you, you’re so rude.” I simply stated and walk away, but I didn’t get out of the shop. I’ll just look for something new; I won’t let that guy ruin my day. Since this is one of the happiest days I can ever have, my father just accepted me for who I am, and he is throwing a party for me. So yeah I will be nice enough, not to start a fight with that guy.
I finally picked out another tuxedo, and it didn’t take me that long, but I still prefer the first one I looked at. Yeah I’ve asked the assistant if they have any of it left after the rude guy left, but they said that it was a limited edition, and they only made a piece of it. So sadly, I wasn’t able to buy it.
“You picked another great tuxedo sir, there are two specially designed tuxedo and you chose one of it. I know it will sound awkward sir, but it was a gay who made that, and he said that the two who’ll be wearing these tuxedos will be together by fate.” She said with a forced smile on her face.
“What the heck! I’ll choose another tuxedo then, why didn’t you tell me earlier!” I shouted at her, causing her to flinch.
“I’m sorry sir, but I’ve already key it in to the system & there’s no way to remove it. And what I’ve said earlier on is clearly written right in front of the door sir.” She said looking directly to my eyes, I can see that she was genuinely sorry, but I couldn’t let that happen! Even though I believe it’s not true, but I just don’t want to have any connections with that rude guy. Yeah I will die if I’ll get involved with such a guy.
“I don’t care I’m not paying for that crap!”
“But I thought… Please sir; don’t do that I’ll be in a big problem if you don’t pay for this. This job is so important for me, how can my family survive if I don’t have any job! Please sir, I’m begging you.” She pleaded, and my heart instantly went soft. Well yeah I’m soft hearted, though sometimes people do get on to my nerves, but I’m not that heartless to let this person and her family starves to death.
“Okay, just throw it in for me then, and I’ll pay for it.” I handed her my credit card since I doubt my cash is enough for this class of tuxedo.
“Are you serious sir? This really cost a lot, and you want me to throw it? I don’t want to offend you or something, but it was just a saying that came from one of our designers, not that it’s all true.” she said, well that quite shook up my mind.
“Well I guess you’re right, sorry if I acted such a jerk just because of this.” I said as I pointed to the tuxedo which is now in a box.
“No worries sir, I should be thanking you.” She said and I didn’t bother replying, I just gave her a simple smile as I grab the box and walk towards the parking lot. I feel awful holding such huge box; they could just put it in a small paper bag. Why this big? I feel like everyone is staring at me.
Once I reach to the back of my car, I opened it and lay the box in there. I sighed from such a simple relief; well at least I don’t feel awful anymore. Time to go home, I guess. As I’m driving home, I felt like something was vibrating in my pocket. Of course there is, my phone is in there. I hold the steering wheel with one hand and I grab my phone at my pocket using my other hand, and I pressed answer call.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing young lady?” My father shouted from the other line. “I told you that we are having a party for you, so where are you?”
“Dad, I told you already that I’m gay not a lady. I’ve already bought my tuxedo okay? And I had an argument with a rude guy. So please stop this already.” I answered; irritation was clearly shown in my voice that’s for sure.
“What the hell! Do you still remember the face of that guy? Your fiancé will surely kill him for being rude to you.”
“Huh?” I said blankly. Did he just say fiancé? “So this is the reason why you’ve accepted that I’m gay, because sooner or later I will still marry a girl! I hate you dad, I really, really hate you!” I shouted through the line, and I can imagine how my father flinched from that.
“No honey, you got it wrong. Your fiancé is a guy, I won’t force you to marry a girl if what you really want is a d*ck in your hole. You know that I will never force you to do something.” He said with a tender caring tone.
“Dad can you even hear yourself? Aren’t you disgusted with the thought of it? And by the way you are already forcing me to do something I don’t want to.” I said, as I stare directly at the road.
“I know, but I need to get used to it! I know you aren’t disgusted with the thought because that is what you really want, and besides I don’t think that you’ll be the top. And this is for your own good; I don’t want you to marry some douche bag. I want my only daughter to marry the best guy he can have.”
“Oh, god I don’t know what to even say dad! I’ll be home in a few minutes and we will discuss about this matter.” I said as I hang up the phone, but received a message from my dad after a few seconds saying ‘He is already driving towards our place honey; try your best to get home as fast as you can. So you can see who the guy is, I bet you’ll like him. He’s so gorgeous; the only problem is the age. He is eight years older than you, but I bet you’ll have a good time
with him in the bed.’ I blushed after I read the last part of the text, my father is such a…. I can’t even find words to explain!
I need to get home as fast as I can, I can’t marry that guy. I already have a boyfriend, and I bet he will be mad at me if I can’t settle things before he knows about this. Alright I’ll tell the guy that I don’t like him, and I think that my father will not say anything about it, but instead he will just let me be happy. I hope that this is all going to be as planned, wait is that a plan already? God I’m such an idiot, I need to think of better things to say.
“Sorry, but I don’t want to marry you. I already have a boyfriend and that’s it.” I murmured, I think this will work fine.