•◇•
"You sucked me in through the cinnamon stars"
•◇•
Dawnclaw felt a weight leave her, or perhaps, she was leaving it?
Either way, she felt lighter now.
She felt free-flowing, and glistening, and translucent.
She heard the sound of rain. It was pattering against the ground around her, soaking into the soft dirt and moss. She felt it around her, not so disgustingly wet, but smooth and peaceful.
She didn't feel wet at all.
She opened her eyes, greeted by dismal grey clouds.
She was in camp. But not in the medicine den.
It struck her as odd.
But Dawnclaw noticed an even stranger phenomenon. Her wound was gone, completely healed. Her throat was perfectly fine. No scar, no missing fur.
It wasn't that she saw her wound, no. She'd need a puddle for that. (And judging by the noise around her, it wouldn't take her long to find one.) It was more a feeling. She sensed it, she knew it was gone. There was no pain at all.
She sat up, and saw that it was indeed raining. Small water droplets fell from the sky, and landed in a splash. Dawnclaw could see her Clanmates huddled in their dens, with looks of deep sadness on their faces.
Why were they sad? Minkfoot had been found out, and she, Dawnclaw, was alive!
Are they sad because I'm alive?
But Dawnclaw had more pressing questions. Why wasn't she in the medicine den? How much time had passed? And why was her wound completely healed?
.... And why wasn't the rain touching her?
Inside, Dawnclaw knew that all of these questions had one answer, but it was an answer she didn't want to face.
But she had to.
Dawnclaw turned around slowly, and found herself looking at a small group of cats.
Rooktail, tiny little Bearkit, Dovefang, Dawnclaw's deceased mentor, and Sablepaw.
Dawnclaw opened her mouth, wordlessly.
The group walked over to her, their fur glittering with the light of stars. The pressed themselves against her, while Dawnclaw trembled.
"It's not fair." She said hoarsely.
"I didn't want to live this way. I was barely a warrior.. I failed my kits... I accomplished nothing." Her voice was hollow.
Dovefang shook his head at her.
"Hush Dawnclaw, hush. You didn't fail your kits at all. You had a lot to give, and you didn't gain that much. But death isn't the end, not at all! In StarClan, life goes on. In StarClan, everyone can grow and flourish, free of trauma. And you have Sablepaw to help, remember?"
Dawnclaw stared at the grey tabby, and her chest burst open.
There was no blood, there was no pain. There was a blossom in the place of her ribcage, it was swelling with hope. She had a chance to be free.
"Before we get caught up in this matter, we have a few things to discuss." Rooktail told her, in his typical serious manner.
Dawnclaw nodded. "And that is?"
"StarClan cats can travel from the skies and back to our territory. All you have to do is fade." Bearkit meowed, wisdom shining in her tiny, kit-blue eyes.
Dawnclaw nodded again.
"To fade, you just have to concentrate. Close your eyes and visualise yourself dissipating into the atmosphere. And you do it! I stay around here most of the time, so Brindlebee isn't alone. She was a good cat. She did bad things, yes, but it wasn't her fault." Bearkit said earnestly, and her words broke Dawnclaw's heart.
Not sure I agree with you, little one. If a person does bad things, then they're a bad person.
"Do they know we're here?" Dawnclaw asked.
"Of course not." Dovefang snorted. "If you knew how many times I tried to stop you doing stupid things.." He growled.
Dawnclaw laughed in spite of it all.
"Do you want to see your kits and Pinetuft?" Bearkit asked, innocence as sweet as honey slid from her jaws.
Dawnclaw's gaze became shadowed.
"Not yet. I don't think I can."
Bearkit nodded understandingly.
"I'm going to see Swallowpelt." She purred, her wrinkled pink skin shimmering like sunlight on water.
Dawnclaw looked up suddenly.
"What about that cat? That Minkfoot mentioned, the one she trapped in a hole? We need to rescue him!"
"No need." Sablepaw said, his voice deep and his eyes on her paws.
"They were found with you and Minkfoot. You were dead and she was dying and blood was everywhere. The Clan found them because they had managed to escape and went to find Minkfoot and kill her; they heard her voice. They were foaming at the mouth and they.. they weren't a cat anymore. Snakestar killed them, there was nothing anyone could do for them. They're okay now, though. In StarClan." He told her.
"And.. Minkfoot?"
"Well, her God wasn't real, we all knew that." Dovefang scoffed.
"She's not in the Dark Forest." Rooktail cut in smoothly.
Seeing Dawnclaw's look of shock, he continued. "Not yet, anyway. Her wound was horrific, she hasn't healed yet. She'll awaken in StarClan in a few sunrises, and in the meantime, she's having her trial."
"Her trial?" Dawnclaw echoed.
"Yes." Rooktail confirmed.
"StarClan will decide what to do with her. It's judged externally and internally. Externally is the actions, and internally is the thoughts, the intentions, the reason why. You had a trail too, you know, but it was a short one. Some cats didn't want you here because of what you did to Sablekit, but it was quickly decided that what happened wasn't intentional, and that you did your best to support him in the aftermath."
Dawnclaw sat down, everything was too much for her.
"Does every cat have a trial?"
"Of course not!" Dovefang snorted.
"Have Minkfoot and I been buried?"
"Yes." Bearkit mewed, walking over to them.
"Why do you care about her? She killed you?"
Dawnclaw gave a half smile.
"I understand her, in a way. She just wanted to be a better cat, as I did. The difference was, she murdered and lost all her morality in the name of a God, while I lay around in self pity."
Bearkit looked furious.
"She killed me! She ended every chance I would've had! I was supposed to die a deputy, you know! I was supposed to live!"
And with that, she faded, tears glittering in her wild eyes.
"She seemed so wise, so cheerful." Dawnclaw remarked.
"A cat doesn't have to forgive to be wise. She shouldn't be expected to forgive a cat who robbed her of everything she ever wanted. Just like a cat doesn't have to forgive their abuser." Sablepaw spat bitterly.
He.. He doesn't forgive me?
"It's a good thing I love you, Dawnclaw!" He said, his tone light and cheeky.
Dawnclaw blinked. Light and cheeky? Sablepaw?
"StarClan can heal more than physical wounds." Dovefang nudged Dawnclaw affectionately.
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A/N:
There is literally just the epilogue to go and then this is over.
Note that Sablepaw, or any other mentally ill cat isn't ever fully healed. They have to get though some of it on their own, though the severity is significantly lessened.
And Minkfoot is going to end up in StarClan, but she will face harassment for the majority of her StarClan days. Similar to Ashfur's situation.
Lotusfur always stands up for her though.
And Bearkit will never forgive Minkfoot, nor should she be expected to.
And another thing ! I'm going to be doing a character Q and A, it will be posted in my oneshot book. So list any questions for the characters below :)
Fact Of The Chapter: Dawnclaw's mentor died a few sunrises before her final assessment, the two were close, as mentors and apprentices usually are.