It was raining and the pavement shined like mirrors reflecting the enormous moon up in the cloudy sky. There was not a soul on the alley that led to the now deserted Smile and Grin nightclub; where there was once music, sensuality and fun, there was now darkness and solitude. The view was apocalyptic, depressing. A huge barricade made with destroyed cars and pieces of furniture from the club prevented the entrance of intruders to the place.
Two figures stood close in silence, hiding silently in the darkness. The taller one, a cloaked man remained quiet as he assesed the situation, his detective self making plans inside his head. The other one clenched his jaw in anger, clutching the gun in his holster as his free hand turned to a tight fist, fury already running through his veins.
"Don't try anything, Joker. We're just here for-"
"Research," the clown said, wet strands of emerald hair running down his face making him look more lethal, "whatever you say, evil stepmother."
Stepping carefully out of the shadows, the two enemies ran towards the building and surrounded it until they reached the back. There, the Batman pulled out two grappling hooks, throwing one to the Joker carelessly, whose face lit up like a little child with a brand new toy.
"Do you know how to use th-" Batman was cut off by the Joker who had already fired the device and hooked it to the ceiling. After giving him a sarcastic smirk, the clown started climbing the walls effortlessly and Batman followed. When they reached the top of the building, J lead his companion to a hidden entrance: the figure of a golden juggling clown carved to the wall.
"Turn around, Batsy. Only my Queen and I are allowed to know the password to this passage." he said with a hint of mockery to which Batman rolled his eyes and looked away as Joker pressed the juggling balls on a pattern and then the sound of a door cracking open cut the silence. They entered a narrow aisle that led to a room, filled with weapons, jewelry and many other strange artifacts that could only belong to the Clown Prince of Crime.
"Welcome to my playroom, my winged friend!" he said, arms wide opened in invitation. "Now if you excuse me, I'll load myself a bit." The Joker disappeared for a moment, leaving Batman standing awkwardy in the middle of the room. A few moments later, the clown joined him once more holding Harley's pink holster and more guns, now wearing a dark green leather jacket and black jeans. Batman threw him an annoyed look at his attire.
"Seriously, Joker?"
J chuckled as he adjusted his holster and ran his fingers through his wet hair, "Sorry, B-B but I was tired of running around with those dull black clothes you gave me. I need to look good for my baby when we go back. Now follow me, if you please."
They walked through another dark aisle until they reached Joker's former dormitory. To his surprise, it looked exactly the same, not a single furniture out of place. However, something caught his full attention when his eyes landed on a necklace laying on his favorite purple armchair. An emerald necklace he was planning on giving to Harley for her birthday. His brain was suddenly clouded with anger and his hand reached for the piece of jewelry. Then, the sound of a gun loading brought him back from his day dream.
"Came back for some clean underwear, clown?" Daemon said, his mechanical arm dangerously poking J's side, but he didn't flinch or move.
"Well, actually I did." Joker replied with a smug grin. "And to also grab my stolen throne back to myself." His expression turned lethal and Daemon narrowed his eyes at Joker, before shifting his eyes towards Batman, who was standing carefully watching the scene between the two dangerous men.
"Allies with the enemy now?" Daemon taunted. "What? Have nobody on your side? You poor thing."
"I know that deep inside you fear me and what I am capable of." Joker was getting agitated with each word, as he walked towards the Captain, his head moving from side to side like a snake ready to attack. The clown bent over towards his ear and whispered, "If I can make my enemy work for me, think of what else I can do."
For a moment, Daemon's body stiffened and J knew it as he laughed.
"So, how's your dead wife Jeannie doing?" Joker's laughter dropped in an instant and he growled, grabbing Daemon's neck, pointing his gun towards his forehead as he backed him against the wall with immense strength but Daemon seemed unfazed by any of it.
Batman stepped forward but J raised his hand at him, stopping any move from the dark knight before it even started.
"Stay out of this, Bats." he said, his eyes fixed on Daemon's, "Why do you care, Captain Shit? You killed her, you son of a bitch."
"No, no... don't get me wrong. I'm just missing her petite little body, that sweet rosy cheeks, and just seeing her naked was a dream come true. I don't blame her. She needed a man, not a failed excuse of an actor who couldn't even feed her!" Daemon teased and Joker's face turned into pure confusion before realization striked him hard. He couldn't believe his ears as he slammed Daemon's head against the wall, who didn't flinch but smiled victoriously.
"Accept it Joker!" Daemon shouted. "Your dead wife cheated on you with me."
Joker didn't move, his jaw was rigid, trying not to leak out any emotions but deep inside, his heart was burning with rage. "I wonder how would Harley's body b—" and then he lost it. Joker pulled the trigger, the bullet hitting Daemon right on his left shoulder, but it was not enough for him. Joker didn't want him to die. He wanted him to suffer in pain.
"Don't you dare say a word about Harley or I'll cut your dick in half! Her body is permanently damaged because of you, piece of shit!" Joker view turned red and his fist landed on Daemon's face again and again until Batman grabbed him by the arms and pulled him away from the Captain, whose laughter only added more wrath to the clown.
The room was suddenly filled with smoke that came from one of Batman's bombs and he dragged the Joker out of the room through the secret passage, leaving a hurt Daemon laying on the floor.
'Harley is alive.' he thought. The harlequin was his next target.
♠︎ ♣︎ ♥︎ ♦︎
Harley giggled like a little girl when a cloud of flour filled the air, covering her already pale face. Alfred joined in her laughter and quickly reached for the mixer to turn it off. It was a cute scene to watch; you didn't have to be a genius to notice that, no matter how hard he tried not to, the old man was growing fond of the bubbly blonde girl.
"Alfie, I had it all under control!" she said as she shook off the flour from her braided hair and clothes. He smirked and turned the mixer on once more in low speed.
"You have to make sure to start on low speed after you add the dry ingredients or you will end up with a flour storm," said Alfred as he tapped the tip of Harley's nose which was covered in white powder, "just like it happened now, lass."
The harlequin nodded obediently and watched the ingredients twirling as they blended, her stomach making a funny sound at the smell of chocolate filling her nostrils. She unconsciously placed a hand on her tummy and smiled to herself.
"Thank you for baking me a birthday cake, Alfie." she said as Alfred stopped the mixer and poured the batter in the baking pan. "No one's ever baked anything for me before."
The butler smiled down at her sympathetically. "Well you need to learn so you can bake cakes for that little one."
Harley's smile faltered, her hand pressed closer to her belly. She was still reluctant to the idea of being a mother, however things seemed to be getting better; with the Joker's help she had even managed to stand up and take a few baby steps. It was painful but the progress was worth it. And his yearning for the baby melted her and left her helpless, with no options. Harley loved that man so much to the point of forgetting herself in the process to make him happy.
"Alfred, do you think having this baby is the right thing to do?"
The old man froze, staring blankly at the oven. Any other time the answer would have been absolutely not, but he had seen changes in the odd couple and perhaps, this child, was the salvation for the crazy clowns. Maybe the Joker could do some good for the sake of the kid.
Alfred smiled and served Harley and himself a cup of tea. "I think this little one is going to bring so much joy to your lives, young lady." he said, taking a seat next to her.
She stiffened at his words, the bird boy present on her mind and for the first time since Robin's death, Harley felt miserable. Tears filled her big eyes and she reached for Alfred's hand and they stared at each other in mutual understanding.
"I'm so sorry, Alfie." said the harlequin. The butler nodded. It was all forgiven.
A few minutes later, when Alfred was about to decorate the cake, a fuming Joker entered the kitchen and as soon as he spotted Harley, he scooped her up from the wheelchair in his arms and stormed out of the place, leaving Alfred with a confused look.
The cake would have to wait.