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ISABELLA
On Wednesday, Addy and I part for a class like usual. The week is flying by, which I'm thankful for because I haven't been in the mood to learn. Especially when Jake is the only thing on my mind. Of course, I'm disappointed he had to go, but school comes first. So, I swallow some of my advice and rid my mind of him so I can focus.
I take a seat in the empty lecture hall earlier than I need to be and pull out my notes to kill time. One by one, the empty seats fill, but nobody sits beside me since I hide in a corner seat.
As if the universe heard me talking about sitting alone, someone plops right next to me. I hastily look up from the pages of my notebook and almost laugh from the absurdity. Of course.
My eyes meet Miles', and a shit-eating grin forms on his face. I sigh, there are how many other seats open, and he had to choose the one next to me. I clench my pen, trying to keep myself from acting irrationally.
Cocking his head to the side, he asks, "Is this seat taken?" Even though he's already sitting in it.
"Looks like it now," I answer without looking at him, returning my attention to my book even though I want to say, Yeah, ass-wipe, you're sitting on my imaginary friend, now get the hell up. I try my best to read the words on the page, but I'm too distracted to focus, so I pretend.
He kicks his legs onto the seat in front of him and throws his hands behind his head. "Saw you with that blond guy on Saturday," he says. "New boy-toy?"
I stare at his stupid face. I didn't realize he saw me with Jake. His eyes burn holes in the side of my head, waiting for a reply, but I never give him one. Thankfully, the professor walks in, sets his bag down, and begins talking, saving me from this awful encounter.
Note to self, never come to class early ever again.
My fingers move over my computer keys swiftly as I take notes. Not once do I avert my attention elsewhere, but I notice someone else does. Every once in a while, Miles will look over at me, then stare at my computer screen, then back to the professor. I'm incredibly tempted to tell him to piss off, but I don't until he does it for the sixth time.
"Do you mind?" I whisper agitatedly, not wanting to draw attention to myself.
"Excuse me?"
"I said, do you mind? Do I need to spell it out for you?"
He blinks twice as if he's trying to process what I'm saying. His arms fold over his chest. "You're kind of rude, did you know that?"
I let out a short, incredulous laugh. He has the audacity to say I'm rude after all the things he's done. I pick up my things and walk across the row to an empty seat far away from him. Some people look to see what the ruckus is, but I couldn't care less.
When I'm situated, I release a quiet breath and resume taking notes in peace.
Class is finally dismissed what feels like an eternity later, and I storm over to Addy who is waiting at our designated bench. She notices me plowing towards her, and her eyes widen.
"What's up with you, grumpy?" she jests, but I don't laugh or crack a smile. I sit up straight and point to Miles, who is wooing a different girl across the courtyard.
Her face scrunches up when she sees him. "What did he do now?"
"He just likes to piss me off."
I watch him grab some brunette's hand and place a kiss on it. "I don't know if he forgot what happened between us, but I didn't."
"Avoid him."
"I do."
"Do a better job," she says, and I narrow my eyes at her.
"Thank you, good idea. Now let's get out of here." I grab her hand and pull her towards the parking lot. However, I fight the urge to look back at Miles. But I give in to the temptation and find ass-wipe staring right at me.
✤
For what feels like the one hundredth time tonight, I pick my phone up and check my messages which, to no surprise, are still empty.
Annoyed, I toss it to the bottom of my bed and continue reading my anatomy textbook of the heart. For the longest time, I didn't know what I wanted to go to school for. Ever since I was a little girl, I wanted to be a professional singer. But as I got older, reality set in and I realized it would never happen, especially since I wanted to have a normal life.
So, I chose the next best thing I loved: helping people. I felt that if I became a nurse, it would gratify me knowing I can save someone's life.
My mom and stepdad were ecstatic when I told them I wanted to go to nursing school. Particularly since I was following in my mother's footsteps. As it got closer to applying, all I could think about was the cost of everything, even though they told me not to worry about it.
Ever since my dad passed away from cancer when I was a child, it has been hard on us. My mom was fortunate enough to have met a lovely man named Joey that loves and takes good care of her. He isn't my real dad, but I still love him like he is. I know my real dad would be proud of all of us, including my younger sister, Sierra, for moving forward with our lives.
"Bell, I am running to the store for real, we're out of coffee grounds!" Addy screams from the living room, and then the front door slams shut. She's the only person I know that would run out at nine o'clock at night for coffee, and that's why she's my best friend.
My phone goes off, catching me off guard. I reach it in record time, hoping it's
Jake, and to my luck, it is.
Smiling uncontrollably, I answer instantly. "Hey, Jake."
"Hey, Pumpkin."
I fall back onto my bed. "How was your exam?"
"Pretty good," he says, sounding slightly detached from the conversation.
"That's good." I wait for him to speak, but he never does. I hear shouting and cheering in the background.
"Yep, well, the football game is coming back on. I just wanted to call and say hi. Talk to you soon," he finally says. I bite my lip, trying to hold back my unmistakable sadness.
"Yeah, talk to you la-" Three beeps sound into my ear before I can finish my sentence.
Wordlessly, I pull the phone from my ear and stare at the disconnected call. I rub my hands up and down my face, frustrated, and take a deep breath to collect myself. Is talking to your boyfriend for over thirty seconds too much to ask for?
That pit in my stomach grows stronger. Enough now that it has teeth, and those teeth have sunk into my skin, just enough to cause pain.
I distract myself until Addy comes home. The second I hear the door open, I yell for her to come to my room. Being the amazing friend she is, she doesn't hesitate. Running through the door, she jumps beside me, facing the ceiling.
"What's up?"
"I want you to tell me if I'm reading into things."
"What things?"
I turn onto my side to look at her. "You know how I told you Jake had to leave early for an exam?" She nods, and I continue. "Well, he just called, and we talked for less than fifteen seconds before he told me the game was on, and then hung up. The only reason it makes me feel weird is because of how he was acting here."
"I thought you said everything was good between you guys?"
"Everything was great, for the most part, aside from some weird instances where he seemed distant. It's just frustrating."
"Have you talked with him about this?" she asks, and I say no.
"Well, nothing is going to change if you don't have a conversation with him. That's the biggest part of a relationship, being able to talk about things that upset us." I cock an eyebrow. I wasn't expecting that out of Addy, but I nod, knowing she's right.
Silence consumes us briefly, then she jumps up excitedly, smacking my leg. I try to stop her by grabbing her hands, but she continues.
"Jeez, what's wrong? Stop hitting me!"
She pulls her hands into her lap, closes her eyes, and collects herself. As she opens them back up, she has a smug grin on her face. "We need to have more fun. Friday we're going to a party."
"We aren't friends with anyone who is having a party."
"You mean you aren't friends with anyone that's having a party." She pokes my shoulder and I scoff.
"Thanks for pointing out that I have no friends."
"No problem." She climbs off my bed, walking to the doorway. "I'm being serious though, let's have some fun."
✤
Soon enough Friday rolls around, and we are in her closet trying to find something for me to wear. We've already gone through mine; but, nothing was party-appropriate. It was too formal or too bland. She pulls out a little black piece of cloth. "How about this?"
"Are you sure that's not a shirt?" I chuckle nervously. She sighs dramatically and shuffles back into her closet. She tells me to get my black skinny jeans, and when I return, she's holding a dark red top.
My eyes light up with excitement, and I greedily take the top from her to try on. The shirt is tight; it wraps around my torso and ties in the back. When my outfit is on, a look of pure satisfaction illuminates Addy's face, knowing she did well.
An hour later, we arrive at the house, all dolled up. To my surprise, it doesn't look like a party is going on until we walk in. There are people everywhere, drinking, dancing, and grinding on each other. The music is incredibly loud; my eyes feel like they could bulge out of my head.
"Now I remember why we don't come to these things," I say, watching a boy trip and spill his drink all over some poor girl. She smacks him hard.
Addy grabs my hands. "Just try to have fun." Instead of being annoying, I nod.
As the night progresses, I scroll through my phone, awkwardly standing beside Addy who is talking to a guy. Some try talking to me and I try my best to converse with them, but it's too weird knowing they want more than a conversation, which I can't give. So, I excuse myself to get another drink, not giving a shit about how many I've already had.
I bring the cup to my lips, taking a long sip, and when I pull it away, I see Noel sauntering towards me. "Isabella, how nice to see you." He grins, taking a swig from his cup.
I sigh. "Noel."
He leans against the wall, biting his lip earnestly. "Aren't you glad to see me?"
"No, not really." I cast him a fake smile, then try to look anywhere but at him. That's when my eyes catch sight of his posse of friends tucked away in the crowd of people. The only person I don't see with them is Miles.
"I'm sorry we got off on the wrong foot, baby." Noel takes a step closer to me, reminding me he's still there. "I think you look hot tonight."
I don't reply to him. Instead, I laugh in his face and turn on my heel to walk away. However, I'm halted when his voice shouts over the loud music.
"Did you finally grow some balls and stop crying over freshman year?"
"Yeah." I walk back toward him until our faces are mere inches apart. "I took yours."
His smile dwindles as fast as I can blink. I step away from him so I can take a mental picture of his priceless face. I peer behind him, waving at the group of boys whose faces are also in shock. "Tell your friends I said hi."
As fast as my feet can carry me, I rush to find Addy, but she's nowhere to be found. I quickly pull out my phone and call her. "Bell!" she squeals seconds after answering. I notice there isn't talking or music in the background and wonder where she is.
"Hey, where are you?" I question, pressing my finger into my ear so I can hear her better, as my heart thumps against my chest from my encounter with Noel.
"I made a new friend. His name is Jasper! We're going back to his place."
"Addy, do you even know him?" I snap, angry at her departure.
"Calm down Bell, we have some classes together, he's chill. I'll send you his number and information even, just to make you feel better."
"Thank you, please stay safe, Addy," I beg. "Make sure your phone location services are on, remember the word no still exists, and call me if you need anything."
"Will do, love you!" She hangs up, and I shove my phone into my pocket. This is also another reason I don't go to parties. She always ends up ditching me for guys. Leaving me helpless around hundreds of horny boys.
Having no more reason to be here, I walk outside, perching myself on the stairs. The nighttime breeze blows my hair awry as I dig through my purse for the car keys. I frantically push all of its content around realizing I don't have them; Addy does.
I close my eyes, trying to think how long it took to get here, which I realize was only ten minutes. I could walk, it's better than getting in the car after drinking, even if it was only a small amount.
While I try to think of a solution, my phone rings. I pull it out, seeing that it's Jake. Instantly my mood changes, and my mouth curls into an enormous smile. I walk closer to the road for privacy.
"Hey, babe," I say, exhaling from relief. A moment passes and all I can hear is giggling and music through the phone. "Jake?"
"Fuck you, Isabella."
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