[A/N] This chapter is very long, and should make up for the filler. But unfortunately, I can't help but feel that this story is coming to a close. I can't tell how long I've been writing this, but it's been a long time, and I'm proud to say that I can finally put this story into commission. I'll be deleting the standalone author's notes in this story (with the exception of the one that states I have another story idea, which I don't know if I'm actually going to write or not), as well as the tag challenges so that the only author's notes will be in the chapters themselves. This is the second to last chapter. I'm sorry this is so sudden, but this really is the best way to go out. Thank you all for sticking with me until the end.
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It had been just over two and a half years since I awoke from my unprecedented slumber, but during that slumber, that was oh-so-long ago, news of my actions had spread to every corner of Germany. Rumor went that even neighboring countries were aware of the crimes I had committed. I awoke to find that it's inhabitants were much more than cross with me, and there were more riots and uprisings than I would have liked to deal with. They hated me, to say the least. But they were right to. I had taken innocent lives, which made me even worse than my mother and father before me. Why wouldn't they despise me?
I never had the courage to face them. Instead, I was protected constantly by my guardsmen, even when I rarely step foot outside of the manor. Overcome with fear of my people, I had convinced myself that if I every step foot outside, even with an entourage of men, there would be an assassin waiting for me. They would watch my demise, watch the life leave my body and know they had done the right thing. They will have rid the manor of it's defiled bloodline, and the country would go to war with itself in deciding who would be the next ruler.
And once they found an apt ruler, or a family fit to do so, Germany would finally be at peace. There would be no worrying over what the royal family would do. There would be no fear of innocent people losing their lives, preyed on by beasts of malice, just to be fodder for those beasts. In time, the crimes I committed, as well as the mere memory of my existence, will be forgotten by everyone.
But that's not what happened. In reality, what occurred was far from what I believed. Rather than killing me, detesting me until they did so, rather than spit venom at me for the rest of my days with their words, they forgave me. It was a gradual process, and it took much time. But, nonetheless, I was thankful, albeit staggered. They all became confident that it wasn't my fault I had become a beast, and that it was imprinted in my DNA. My parents had known what they were, but not only did they consciously consume their people, they never told me I was that way. It was likely because they wouldn't trust a child with confidential information. There was too much they could lose if I spilled their secret. So when I was on the verge of death, my demonic instincts took over, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
What was also astounding was the fact that the people took these words to heart from my personal servant, whom they were aware had showed what they called 'the utmost cowardice'. I could understand why they would say such a thing about him, but even so, I couldn't convict him. He did what he did because he felt that he wasn't enough for me. He felt that he failed his job, that he messed up in a way that couldn't be fixed in any other means than to remove himself from the situation entirely. He wanted what he thought was best for me, and that was what mattered most to me.
Levi worked tirelessly to have the people regain their trust in me, and it was thanks to him that they now believed I was fit to rule, even considering what I had done. It was a rough road for him, but he had the support of the entire manor. And speaking of the manor, it didn't take nearly as long for it's workers to recover as it did for the country, which was wonderful. Everyone was laughing and smiling again, even amidst all the utter chaos and disaster that was Germany.
But he seemed a little lonely at times. At first, I wondered why, but it didn't take long for me to realize that he missed Isabel by his side. A few months after I awoke, she told us all that she no longer had a part to play, because I had been found, and found out. Moreover, she told us, her and Farlan, her brother, needed to catch up after having been separated for so long. I understood; I would feel the same if it were me in her situation.
But Levi seemed devastated. They'd been roaming around together, bonding for two months, it was hard for him not to feel sad at Isabel's departure. But we made sure she was always close to us. The vacant house in the nearby village was ultimately given to the two foxes, and for that, they seemed grateful. They did come to visit on multiple occasions, and each time they did, it brought a smile to Levi's face. I couldn't help but smile as well when I saw the look of happiness and content on his usually lax and melancholy features.
As of now, the entirety of the manorial staff were gathered around the largest table we had, but despite this, there was a good number of people that were standing behind those seated. I was at the head of the table, and Levi was in the closest seat to mine. Everyone held a glass of wine and a plate of food, and was chattering with one another about whatever came to mind The table itself was adorned with a vast amount of wine bottles so that nobody had an empty cup unless they wanted one. The setup reminded me of a feast, in a way. We didn't call this situation a feast, but rather a celebratory gathering. I wasn't engaged in any conversation, mainly because the one person I would have a conversation with was already speaking with another. But I didn't mind.
Soon, however, I picked up my glass and clinked my fork against it, drawing everyone's attention to me. All speaking had ceased, and you could hear a pin drop in the silence. It was just what I needed.
"Everyone, I just want to say how grateful I am to all of you. It's been two and a half years since the dreadful incident, and in that time, you all helped me restore the country to it's former glory. People are happier, more friendly towards each other, and most importantly to me, forgiving of what I had done. Of course, I couldn't have done it without Levi Ackerman."
I cast him a warm glance, only to see he had smiled softly already.
"You all know him as my personal servant. And I'm sure you all know of his past. I won't be re-telling the tale now, for his sake, but just remember that time. I found him when I was young, and ever since then, we bonded, in our own strange way. Now, as he sits alongside me, I feel compelled to think of him as more than a servant; he is my friend. And my friend here was what saved me from my own people, even though I shame myself by saying so. I was not strong enough to recover my own reputation, but he did not stop working until it had been. For that, I am thankful. So I propose a toast. To peace, prosperity, and Levi Ackerman, for making such things possible."
I smiled and raised my glass high, giving a hearty "Cheers!" to my staff. They all mimicked my actions and words, raising their glasses and cheering. We all clinked glasses to one another and took a sip of our glasses. The cooks took it upon themselves to fill the glasses that were soon to be empty. Everyone then resumed their meals and chatter, but they all seemed much more chipper than before. I myself engaged in small talk with one of the treasurers. It was a wondrous night, one that I was certain I would never forget, not for all of my days.
But not because of the lavish food and the perfectly aged wine.
Later that night, I was in my study, leisurely reading one of the many books in my library. It was a play by Shakespeare, "The Taming of the Shrew". It was a rather well-thought out comedy surrounding a man named Petruchio, who married a beautiful, yet badmouthed, woman named Katherine, whose attitude sent may other suitors looking for another to marry. I'd already read the story, so I knew she eventually becomes obedient through playful humiliation, but it was a good book to reread in cases of boredom such as the one I was experiencing.
As I was nearing the ending of the story, I heard a staccato knock on my door. I turned my head and told the person to come in, and when Levi came stumbling in, red in the face... needless to say, I wasn't expecting to see such a sight. He started rambling on with a slur in voice, such to an extent where I couldn't understand a word he said. I decided to walk over to him, originally to do nothing more than steady him and offer him a glass of water, but his face seemed to redden more as I approached. I assumed it was the alcohol in him, but I still had a small nagging feeling that wasn't the case. He was acting somewhat apprehensively around me.
"Levi, I'm surprised at you. You've had quite a lot to drink, I can already tell. Shall I get you a glass or two of water?"
Warily, he shook his head at my words.
"No... you don't have to do that, Eren... I just... wanted to tell you something."
I raised an eyebrow and tilted my head in confusion at his words. Surely if he had something he needed to inform me of, he could have told me whilst he was sober, could he not have? Why would he wait until he had more drinks than he typically would? It didn't need saying that he'd never had such copious amounts of alcohol before, primarily because not I, nor anyone else, had ever seen the man act in such a way. It as possible that he himself wasn't aware of just how much alcohol he'd consumed. But I decided I'd listen to what he wanted to say.
"Go on, then."
Upon hearing my go-ahead, he looked up at me with a slight look of determination.
"Listen... Eren... I like you. Like... a lot. I've liked you for a really long time... And... I know I don't act like it, but... I do. I really like you. But it's weird for me to like you, because I'm your servant, and you're the prince, and... we're both men anyway... and I know that, but I still... I still like you, and... and I want to be with you... I know I can't, but... but..."
As he tried to figure out what more he was going to say, if anything at all, I stared at him with widened eyes. I couldn't believe the words that left his lips. Was it true, that he had feelings for me? I was foreign to the concept, in a way; I had never been in a situation where someone told me anything close to what Levi told me just now. Sure, some held awe and respect, some may have even had what one would call idolization towards me, but never something such as... such as love. He hadn't said that specific word, but at this point, I was certain that was what he felt towards me.
But I didn't feel that way towards him. At least, I didn't think I did. I wanted to be closer to him, but as friends, not as lovers. I'd never sat down and thought to myself, 'Maybe I want more than friendship from him', at any point. I didn't want to give him false hope by saying I returned his feelings, but I also didn't want to crush him by saying I didn't. So, I opted to do the only thing I imagined I could have done, hoping I wouldn't regret it later on. I got close to him, planting a small kiss on his forehead. He and I both were equally surprised in my actions. It felt somewhat nice... warm, inviting, comforting... I enjoyed that feeling. I held his hands in my own, and the feeling overwhelmed me a bit.
"Levi... I can't say I return your feelings. But... at the same time... I also cannot say that I don't. I don't really know how I feel about you at this point in time... But maybe... maybe if we give this some time, I can decide how I feel. Just go about your days as normal... let me take the time to sit down and ponder how that makes me feel, and when the time comes... when I truly know what my heart wants... I'll tell you."
The raven-haired man smiled, seemingly uncaring of the fact that I hadn't given him a straight answer. He looked down at our hands, took a deep breath, and spoke softly.
"That's alright. I... I love you... and if you later on decide that you don't feel the same... well... I'll still be by your side, no matter what... no matter how you feel about me."