Sweet as Venom
Chapter 18
Gabriella's Point of View
I should go in. But I was frozen- on the foot path just staring at the community health sign. I had made the decision, so I really should follow through. I hadn't come to it easy. But I knew I couldn't have the baby by myself.
I was about to walk in when I heard it. Turning my head and shielding my eyes from the sun- my stomach dropped.
The black Harley was hurling down the street- clearly not doing the speed limit. You couldn't see the detailed paint job, but I knew it was there. Saxon wasn't wearing a helmet. Only sunglasses. His black leathers were dirty and his big thick leather boots with buckles on them, walked towards me.
I gulped.
He knew.
He totally knew.
He pushed his sunglasses up into his messy shot black hair, and his black eyes were on me. He was standing in front of me before I could even move- and for the second time today I was frozen on the spot.
Saxon's hand wrapped around my bicep and he pulled me across the road. My heart was pounding. My skin was sweaty. God he knew.
We came to a stop out front of an alley way. Private away from the ears of the café and away from the community health centre.
"You wanna start explaining?" His words sliced through my nerves.
I pulled out of his grasp but his grip only tightened.
"Now Gabriella."
I was freaking out and I was sure it was showing all over my face. "I well I guess I um should tell you I'm pregnant." I stared at the ground. I couldn't look him in the eye right now.
"I know that much. Who's the father?"
That snapped me back into reality and suddenly I wasn't that shy. My eyes bounced up to meet his and the anger I felt was uncontrollable.
"What do you take me for! Believe it or not Saxon I don't just sleep with anyone. You were an exception." Did he think I just slept with anyone and everyone! How dare he! After I caught him with another woman only days after we broke up.
His eyes hardened. "So I'm the father."
"What do you want a blood test." I attempted to pull my arm from his grasp again, but again failed.
"Why didn't you tell me?" While his eyes were hard as they stared down at me, his words were covered in hurt.
"I attempted too but you were busy." I forced out. Why did I have to explain myself?
"So that's why you came to my room the other day." He said it more to himself then to me. As if it was a puzzle his been trying to figure out for weeks.
"It doesn't matter I've made my mind up." I looked him squarely in the eyes. "And you don't get a say."
Something switched in him. "Like fuck I don't. This isn't something that is all up to you Gabriella this is my kid too."
"So you suddenly want to be a parent do you?"
"I'm already a parent."
"Baby sitting grown ass men compared to changing nappies is different."
"I love you Gabriella."
"Right. Was that you loving me when you were fucking that other woman. Because if it was, I'll pass."
He exhaled sharply. "That was me blowing off steam."
"Some go for a run." I attempted to pull my arm away again and once again his grip just tightened. "But then again not everyone is a president of an outlaw motorcycle group. So I should really put you in a different basket."
"Did you hear me say I love you?"
I love you. That just ticked something inside me. Did I believe him? Could I believe him? Was he just saying it? "I also heard you break up with me."
He rolled his eyes. "I was doing that for your own protection."
I scoffed at that.
"I was Gabriella! It's not safe for you to be involved with me. I'm dangerous."
"Leigh's in a biker club too in case you forgot and he might of worried about my safety but guess what. He decided that nothing would happen to me, because he decided he would make sure it didn't."
He went quiet. And I hadn't noticed when but somewhere in the fight his hand went from gripping my arm to running down my arm- smooth circles.
"Just come back with me. Lets talk about it." His words were calming and defused the situation. "Come on sweetheart. We can make a decision together. You aren't in this alone."
All this time. Since I've been told, that was exactly what it felt like. Like I was alone. Like there was only me, drowning in the sea. Tears swelled up in my eyes and I was reaching out to wipe them away, when Saxon's thumbs did just that. He held my face so gentle, as if I was made of china.
"Come back with me Gabriella."
The way my name rolled off his tongue sent shivers down my spine. I finally found my words again.
"I can't."
"Why?"
"Because Leigh can't know about us."
"I'll handle that." Saxon's words were short. "All you have to worry about this baby and you won't be doing that by yourself either."
"But Leigh will get mad and most likely hit you." I thought of all the ways Leigh would make Saxon suffer for this. Hitting him was the minimum thing he would do. Worst being he would stop following Saxon's decisions. "And he looks up to you. It would get to messy." I shook my head.
"Gabriella. Stop. Look at me." His hands held my head still. He looked fine. He wasn't freaking out. "I can handle Leigh. I'm not worried. So stop worrying about it. Now we are going to head back to the club house and handle this."
I sighed but nodded my head. "Ok."
"Alright." His hands left my face and he took my hand instead. "Have you eaten?"
No I hadn't. "I'm not really keeping food down at the minute."
We started walking back to the bike and the truck. People were staring at us from the café. I guess if you didn't know Saxon, he would intimate you. He was well built, tall and with one look at his toned upper body you just knew he had a well-built abdominal area as well. Women would dream about his six pack. I had seen it and I still dreamt about it.
"Have you seen a doctor about it?" Saxon's words brought me back to reality.
"Um yeah I saw a doctor last week. The same one that said I was pregnant."
"Did she know you were vomiting?"
"I don't know. I don't really remember much of the visit. I kind of well I did go into shock."
His thumb rubbed a circle on the back of my hand. "Fair enough."
"Leigh was there though. He might remember."
Crossing the road, we came to a stop next to the truck.
"I'll ask him." Saxon said before opening the driver's door. "And I'll follow you."
"I'm sorry about the truck."
"What about it?"
"I hotwired it."
A smirk spread across his lips. "I know."
"You can hate me about it." I cocked my head to the side and then looked at our intertwined hands. What did this mean? We might be talking but we weren't a couple. I let go of his hand and climbed into the truck.
"I don't hate you about it. In fact it impresses me." Saxon said, closing the door and talking through the open window. "Now drive safe." He gave a pointed look. "I'll be watching."
I nodded and smiled. I guess it was nice and slow drive back home. My stomach turned about the whole idea of Leigh knowing. He was going to kill me. Then after that he will kill Saxon.
--
Every felt like all eyes were on you? Maybe you were just imagining it. I wasn't. When I walked into the clubhouse, everyone was staring. From the prospects to the club members. I could ask why? But I guessed they all knew I was pregnant. To be fair some of them wouldn't of cared and I knew some of them weren't staring at me for that reason.
No they were staring at me for a completely different reason.
That reason being that Saxon held my hand tight as he dragged me through them. He looked like he was protecting the most important thing in his life, as he ushered me through. From the 'don't fucking mess' with me look to the I 'have guns and will use them' look.
So no one said a word. Not even my brother. Who was just glaring at the pair of us. He would be putting two and two together and getting my worst nightmare.
Saxon put a hand on my lower back and guided me up the stairs. It was like he was expecting me to break or something. But I couldn't lie, how nice it felt to be touched by him.
But at the same time I couldn't read too much into it. We walked up the hallway and took a left. I knew where we were going now.
I hadn't had the courage to ask, in fact, I had I hadn't said anything. Not when he was helping me climb out of the truck and not when he took my hand and took me through the clubhouse. Right pass everyone. Basically declaring that I was his. Or at the very least, saying he cared a hell of a lot about me.
I wondered why he did and as I watched him unlock his bedroom door, more and more questions came at me. Did he really love me? Did he really break up with me out of protection? Did he really want this baby? Could I be a teen mum? Worse could I bring a child up in this type of environment?
"Here." Saxon held the door open for me and I walked in. I had left in such a hurry last time I was in here I didn't take in just our big it was. The huge leather couch facing the large flat screen on the wall. From the four poster bed on the back wall. Of course there was beer cans and cigarette butts in the ash tray.
"What am I doing here Saxon?" I stopped in the middle of the room, turning to watch him close the door.
"You need sleep." He walked to the bed and threw the blankets back.
"No I don't."
"Right. So those black circles under your eyes are makeup?" He challenged me.
He was right, I hadn't been sleeping. Too busy worrying. "I could have slept in the cottage. Then maybe not the whole club would be thinking I'm your girlfriend."
"You are my girlfriend." He gestured with a hand for me to come to him.
Sighing I did. "No I'm not. You are only doing this because I'm having your kid."
He pushed me back on the bed and undid my jeans buttons, with one swift movement my jeans were off.
"You can think what you like. But you are my girlfriend."
I grabbed his hand. "No. I'm not."
He tucked my legs under and threw the blankets over me. "Well that's what I'm about to tell your brother. So you might as well come to terms with it Gabriella."
"Don't I get a say!"
"You have known me for a while now. You should know by now, when I want something I get it."
"I'm a person. Not a shiny new car."
He let a frustrated sigh.
I fell backwards into the pillows, and immediately was overcome with a need for sleep.
I closed my eyes and then felt the softness of his lips kiss my forehead.
"Sleep. I'll talk to you when you wake up." His words were gentle and knowing he was leaving had me being stupid. I reached out for him, grabbing him by the t-shirt.
My eyes wide. "You promise you will come back?"
His lips twitched into a smile and he nodded his head.
"Ok. Good luck telling Leigh." I muttered into the pillow.
"Don't worry sweetheart I'm all ready for the pain."
I didn't know what he meant by that, but right now I couldn't think more of it. I was already half asleep when I heard the door close.