"Papyrus, you are under arrest for the murder of so many people, we can't even name them all."
Papyrus turned around sharply in surprise. He had been waiting for Undyne to show up with the guards in the Grey Corridor, but the captain's loud voice still startled him.
"WHAT?!"
"Don't 'what' me, you little punk! You admitted it back at my place!"
Undyne motioned for the two guards on her right to cuff Papyrus.
"I DID NO SUCH THING! I SAID I KNEW WHO THE KILLER WAS!" yelled Papyrus angrily.
This was planned, but it still upset him off that she'd arrest him without a second thought. A real friend would have talked to him first, then sent him to trial if they couldn't settle things peacefully. A real friend would have tried to find out why he was doing the things he was, tried to get him to change...
"You can tell it to King Asgore, you piece of crap," said Undyne as the guards slapped the cuffs on Papyrus.
She walked ahead of him and a brisk pace, refusing to look back at him.
Papyrus had hoped that he and Undyne could come to an agreement. It was a FACT that his murders were helping the Underground; the only problem was his help was illegal as long as he wasn't a guard.
"THIS IS UNBELIEVEABLE! THE GREAT PAPYRUS WOULD NEVER HARM AN INNOCIENT!"
Undyne and the two guards ignored him. They led Papyrus down the Grey Corridor towards the Judgment Hall in silence.
Papyrus was fuming.
She could of looked the other way. She could of been a friend and put an end to all this peacefully. She could of made him a guard, and he could have continued his work without everyone feeling scared.
But she just haad to play hero.
The worst part was, she fully expected him to be found guilty, and executed.
"NYEHOO HOO HOO! I WAS ONLY TRYING TO HELP YOU UNDYNE! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?" whined Papyrus as loudly and pitifully as he could. His voice echoed throughout the empty corridor.
Undyne said nothing.
Of course she would.
She didn't care about him. She NEVER cared about him. She was only friends with him because she felt sorry for him. He was just another chance she saw to play hero. A chance to look like a good person and help the poor, friendless, annoying skeleton nobody liked.
Papyrus should of known better.
How dare she...
Reaching the golden hallway, Undyne pushed Papyrus to stand before Asgore.
"Good morning Papyrus," said Asgore with a polite nod.
"GOOD MORNING YOUR MAJESTY," said Papyrus cheerfully, as if he didn't want to tear out Undyne's throat with his teeth.
Undyne grit her own and punched Papyrus in the back of the head.
"OW!"
"STOP TALKING LIKE THAT!" roared the knight captain.
"LIKE WHAT?" asked Papyrus, rubbing the back of his skull.
"ALL LOUD AND OBNOXIOUS!" Undyne clenched her hands into fists hard enough to draw blood. Papyrus couldn't remember ever seeing her so furious.
Good.
"If you wanted me to lower my voice, you could have just asked." he said as calmly as he could.
"DON'T ACT LIKE THAT'S NOT HOW YOU NORMALLY TALK!"
Fuck you, you stupid bitch.
"Enough Undyne!" The king tapped his trident on the golden floor forcefully. Not enough to crack the tile, but enough to get everyone's attention.
"B-but he...Papyrus he-"
"We are here to judge whether or not he's innocent, how he talks is of no concern," said Asgore firmly.
Yeah, that's right. Keep that hideous mouth of yours shut.
"Now normally, Sans would be the judge, but based on the situation, I felt it would be fairer to do so myself. He is your brother after all."
Papyrus nodded.
"I understand your majesty. I, the Great Papyrus, will cooperate as best I can."
"Fuck you, Papyrus," muttered Undyne.
I'm gonna cunt-punt her to the friggen' moon...
Papyrus could feel his rage building, but he kept his eyes on Asgore and a smile on his face. Being the Lying Font made him an incredible actor and he needed those natural skills here as much as he needed his patients.
"If I need to have someone escort you out of the hall Undyne, I will. Now, Papyrus, why don't you tell us your version of what happened this morning?"
"Nyeh?"
"The conversation you and Undyne had," explained the king patiently.
"Oh, yes! I visited Undyne this morning with good news and she went nuts!"
"OH, BULLSHIT!" Forming an energy spear, Undyne rushed at Papyrus, but the two guards held her back by the arms.
Let her go. Please, let her go. I don't mind wearing down the knuckles on these gloves, I can get new ones.
Go ahead and give me an excuse.
"One more word out of turn, and you're gone Undyne!" warned Asgore as he shot Undyne a fierce look. "Continue Papyrus."
"We also talked about me, joining the guard, but she said no because she thought I couldn't bring myself to protect anyone to the best of my ability. Ridiculous yes?"
"I see, and what was this 'good news' you had for Undyne?"
Papyrus struck a heroic pose, his cape blowing behind him with the help of his magic.
"I, the Great Papyrus, have found your killer!" he exclaimed proudly.
Both Undyne and Asgore's brows shot up in surprise.
I thought for sure he'd deny telling me, was I...was I wrong?
"Really? You've found the person we're looking for?"
Asgore smiled reluctantly.
This "problem" had been going on for months. He had no idea when the killings started, but it had gotten to the point where not only did people start noticing, but they'd started complaining as well.
The monsters that went missing were usually dealers he couldn't pin anything on, due to the fact that they knew to stay out of the camera's watchful, yet stationary eye. All Asgore had were witnesses...witnesses that went missing themselves when found out.
The king, when he learned the Resort Killer was mostly killing dealers, had admittedly not put any effort into finding out who they were. The Underground had at one time been a den full of criminals due to overpopulation and lack of jobs. Every day there was a story about a shop getting robbed or a citizen getting mugged, but now the only things put in the newspaper were games and puzzles. The more monsters that disappeared, the less crime there was. Asgore could only assume the monsters he didn't know about, were thieves or killers themselves.
He still wasn't sure if he regretted his decision to turn a blind eye to the Resort Killer, or if catching them was a good idea.
"Indeed I did! My magnificent mind has already easily deduced who the guilty monster is!"
"Well, best to tell me who it is in private. After all, everyone is a suspect. Even those guards over there," said Asgore, pointing to RG 01 and 02. "We wouldn't want you getting hurt."
I can't let the Underground return to the way it was, regardless of whether or not it's justified.
"Ah I see! Very clever you're Highness! As long as they're unsure of whether or not I'm correct, I'll be safe! You two oughta be ashamed of yourselves!"
"Now now Papyrus, we don't know they're guilty yet. They're just suspects like everyone else," chuckled Asgore.
"Seriously?! Me and my bro, we're like, the top two guards in the Royal Guard!" said 01, clearly offended.
"Which is a great cover-up," replied Asgore, matter-of-factly.
Undyne narrowed her eyes.
Something's up.
"Everyone else? You don't suspect my brother, do you your Majesty?"
"He may have only one AT and HP, but that's a good cover-up too. No one would suspect Sans..." the king smiled at Papyrus, enjoying the ruse. As soon as the skeleton mentioned Sans the pieces fell into place motive wise. He was actually a big fan of his brother's comic routines and he knew the Resort area was the most dangerous place in the Underground.
If Papyrus IS the Resort Killer, Sans is quite lucky. Not every sibling would get dust on their hands to protect their brother. How could I punish such devotion? Especially when Papyrus is the one gathering souls for everyone?
"*Gasp* Sans would NEVER!" Papyrus put his hands up over his mouth pretending to be horrified. "MY brother a criminal? That's outrageous!"
"Is it though?"
"MY BROTHER WOULDN'T HURT A FLY!!"
"Possibly, but what about a person?"
"NEVER! LIES, SLANDER!! THIS IS MADNESS!!! HE IS AN INNOCENT!" yelled Papyrus stomping his foot repeatedly.
"Maybe."
"NO NOT 'MAYBE' DEFINITELY!! HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE MY BROTHER OF SUCH HEINOUS ACTS?! I WON'T STAND FOR IT!!" Papyrus pointed at Asgore looking livid, but feeling amused.
"Hmm...perhaps I should bring in Sans for questioning. Being the kind and caring brother that you are, you may be covering for him..."
Undyne's eyes grew wide.
Was THAT what Papyrus was doing?! Was he trying to tell me his brother was the killer?! I'm his best friend so he WOULD confine in me...THAT'S HOW HE KNOWS WHO THE KILLER IS!
Oh god...I told Sans his brother was the killer! He knows Papyrus came to talk to me! Will he go after Papyrus once he's found innocent? Will he come after me?
"ABSOLUTELY NOT!!"
"You don't need to be afraid of your brother Papyrus, we can protect you. You have my word as king."
So Papyrus IS covering for Sans! Sans is the killer!
With his..one HP...and one AT.
..............................................
"Really? Do you even know what he's capable of?" Papyrus put his hands up to his face again as if he were afraid.
This is stupid.
"Are you admitting your brother's the killer?"
They're both being stupid.
"No no! It's purely a hypothetical question!" said Papyrus waving his hands.
This trial is bullshit.
"Well alright, I trust you Papyrus. When you're ready to come forward let me know." Asgore strightened his robe. "I also want to thank you for your honesty. We actually have footage of your conversation with Undyne, given to us by an anonymous source."
"Eh?"
"Who the hell put a camera in my house?!"
"That's not important, what IS important is that we wrap up this case as quickly as possible before any more monsters get hurt. Unfortunately, I've been very busy and I'll need some time before our next audience." Asgore smiled and turned to leave.
Is that right?
Papyrus smiled back at the king.
He knew he could count on Asgore. Asgore was a monster who knew how to do his job right, despite whatever peer pressure he was exposed to, or guilt he had to bear. If Papyrus ever had a hero to look up to, it was the king.
Papyrus wasn't there when both of his children died, but he had heard what had happened afterwards from the grape vine. Apparently Asgore had decided that every human that fell into the Underground would have to die so that their souls could be used to free everyone, but Her Highness didn't like that idea. She thought that killing children that fell into Mt. Ebott was a beastly and disgusting thing to do.
What's disgusting is how easily she abandoned her husband while he was grieving for their children and trying to keep the Underground together.
Poor Asgore. He still loved Her Highness even though it was clear that she was nothing more than a selfish hypocrite. If she really cared about the fallen children, she would have escorted them to the barrier and given up her soul. She could have even fought Asgore and taken his...but she didn't.
She never really cared about the humans, she only wanted to be a mother again. As soon as any child snuck out of her home at night, they became dead to her.
It wasn't just her husband and the fallen children she abandoned either; she ignored the wishes of the entire kingdom.
She was suppose to help look after the people, she was suppose to offer them hope, but what she wanted was of more importance to her. She didn't care if everyone remained underground, just as long as she didn't get blood on her hands.
She never had what it took to be Queen. Someone like her could NEVER fully put someone else above themselves.
A true hero does whatever they can to protect their loved ones, even if it means earning and bearing their hatred. Anyone who puts the law, their conscious, or their own personal sense of honor before the ones they love deserves to lose everything they hold dear.
Papyrus continued to watch Asgore leave and felt himself become inspired anew.
As long as I breathe you will NEVER have to kill a child your Highness. The little vermin won't get anywhere near the Throne Room, just hang on a while longer...
"This was an audience? I thought this was like, a trial or something?" whispered 01 to 02.
Just two more souls. Two more souls and everyone will be safe. If Flowey's information is correct, one of them should be hiding out at the dump...
"It wasn't. Undyne arrested Papyrus without any evidence whatsoever. What this was, was a waste of time. No disrespect to you, Undyne. A guard is not the same as a detective. I'm proud of you for giving it your all, though from you, I expect no less." With that, Asgore left the Judgment Hall and returned to the Throne Room.
"Do not worry Undyne. You arrested me only after you learned that I knew who the killer was. It's obvious you were trying to protect us both. A murderer wouldn't attack a witness surrounded by guards, and they wouldn't attack a guard who suspected the wrong person. An ingenious plan if I do say so myself!" Papyrus flashed her a large smile, as 01 and 02 uncuffed him.
Undyne didn't smile back.
She kept her eyes downcast and said nothing.
Regardless of whether or not Sans is guilty or Papyrus and Asgore were just putting on a show to confuse the suspects, I was still wrong.
What if Papyrus DOES know who the killer was? How much trouble have I gotten Papyrus into? The longer he has to wait for an audience...
He came to me for help and I...I....
"What's wrong Undyne? Are you alright?"
Maybe she needs some ice for that burn Asgore gave her. Nyeh heh heh...
Undyne rubbed the tears out of her eyes and spoke.
"I'm sorry Papyrus. I am so sorry. I've been so paranoid this month-" Undyne shook her head. "No...no that's no excuse. I should never have suspected you. I've stabbed you in the back more than once. I've...done it for years. You...you deserve better." Undyne held her arms and continued staring at the ground.
She was scum.
She really was.
I can't believe I arrested Papyrus when he was just trying to help me. He might have even been seeking help and I turned him away. I yelled at him and accused him and put him in handcuffs...
I can't believe I really thought it was him...
Out of all the people in the Underground, she accused her best friend. A friend she had known for years, and who had agreed without hesitation to help her solve a dangerous case without pay.
She didn't deserve a friend like him.
How close had she come to getting him executed?
I could have gotten the little jerk killed.
Oh my god...
I told Sans his little brother was a serial killer...
"Honestly, I can't imagine a better friend than the one I have now. Don't be sad Undyne! I've already forgiven you!"
You better help me patch things up with Sans, or we're going to have issues all over again.
"Idiot."
"You're not an idiot," Papyrus reassured her. "Twas ' merely a lapse in judgment. You can't be perfect if you're not me, but that's okay, because everyone here loves and supports you no matter how many mistakes you make."
Laughing, despite her tears, she punched Papyrus lightly in the arm. "You're a real piece of work, you know that dweeb? Thanks."
"Always glad to be of assistance! Now about the Royal Guard..."
I swear to every god out there, if she doesn't make me a guard after the stunt she just pulled, I'm adding fish to my next batch of spaghetti...
"I'll tell you what, prove to me that you can kill if necessary. Bring to me a human soul, and I PROMISE YOU I will make you a Royal Guard."
Papyrus jumped up and down in excitement.
"Consider it done, Captain!"
Finally.