This on is for Stayawake21 for being my 7th fan, and I'm sorry that this took forever to do :/ But I hope you know that it really means a lot to me everrytime someone fans me:) and seven is my favorite number so that just makes you cool xP
Hope you all enjoy this one, I think youll be shocked about the ending. Or you'll just really want the next chapter ;) either way i hope you like it, and vote or comment. Since I'm nearing 400 reads, every chapter I write is going to mean a lot more to me.
Zina
Jake’s POV
I knew what I had to do but I didn’t want to. I had to stay strong and stick to my plan; it was the right thing to do. Nothing could stop me, I wouldn’t let anything. I spent all last night prepping myself for what I was about to do and there was no turning back now. As Dumbledore once said, ‘It’s our choice that show who we truly are’. I know that isn’t the full quote but it has truth. I had to do this even though it will cause some pain to myself. It was better of this way.
Zander had asked me to meet him at the old theater for twelve. It had been empty for years but it still had working heating. Zander and I spent more of our younger years running around in there. You never knew what you would find in there and we both loved adventures. So naturally we spent o=hours scooping that place out for any lost treasures. I still have some of the ones we found together. The theater was a signal of our friendship and in recent years our love. I hadn’t been to it since Zander and I broke up, it had been too painful. Even driving by it made my heartache worse.
From the fact we were going to ‘talk’ there I could assume what was going to happen. I had really known all along but I didn’t have any type of proof. This though, this was proof. I figured it out last night when he texted me the meeting place and time. I spent hours thinking of what I should do and how I should react.
But I knew from experience you never know how you will react. Even if you plan it all out. But I know I have to be strong and fight against my heart and do what I knew was right. My heart would do the wrong thing I had to keep following the path I was on. God only knows where I’ll end up if I stray from it. God only know what would happen to my heart. I can’t take the risk of that heartbreak again.
I couldn’t function when Zander left me. There was nothing left for me to do. I couldn’t function without my best friend and love of my life not on my side. But I finally have learned how to do so and I refused to go back to that piteous sate. I would do most anything thing for him but for once I had to be selfish and do something for me. I know that he didn’t love me; he couldn’t since he left me for Zoey.
Time passed quicker then I had hoped for, I had wanted more time to think. Not that there really would have been more time but it could have seemed like it. Fully bundled in my winter cloths I headed out in to cold air that made up Alaska. The abandoned theater was just a few feet away from my house so I wouldn’t be out here long. But I knew from experience that the cold air sinks into your skin fast. To not bundle up would be a death wish.
The theater didn’t seem to be an abandon building; somehow it maintained its prior presence. The lights still functioned. The walls still seemingly had fresh coats of pain and nothing was falling apart; aside from what was created in this place. That was about to be broke much more than it had been and unlike the building there was no way to fix it. The cracks in our friendship and love were to deep to fill. We drift to far apart and now we had to face the truth of our actions.
Zander stood outside the building, leaning against his car. He seemed to have just gotten here since he wasn’t shivering and didn’t appear to have any warm clothing on. But unlike me Zander seemed to be able to maintain body heat better. To be honest he looked just a magnificent and beautiful as he had before. If not a little bit better. Previously I would have denied that he could look better, but I had been proven wrong.
He had a slight tan from his time away; it worked well with his light blonde hair and dark eyes. I knew from experience that the color of his eyes changes with his mood. I had used that in the past to assume how he felt, even when he was lying. No doubt that would come in handy today. But either way I’m going to not let that affect me choice. I wonder if he ever caught on to little things like that about me.
I walked right by him and into the warmth of the building, just like I always had. But today I needed that more than ever. I had to avoid any type of physical contact, just to make sure I stay true to my decision. Hugging him or anything else would just bring back memories of when things were perfect as they could be between us. I couldn’t let those thoughts swarm my mind. I had to keep a clear head. Somehow he always managed to make me forget everything and say what he wants.
Flashback
“Jake, I have to talk to you. It’s important, to us and to our friendship.” Zander said in a soft voice.
His eyes were light, much lighter than normal, he was probably nervous but why I didn’t know. What could possibly be so important about our friendship that he had to tell me… unless he didn’t want to be friends anymore. Or maybe he has a crush on me; probably not I mean why would he? He could have any girl he wanted, why would he want his male friend. Why would he want to go through all the torture when he could be perfectly happy with some girl? Besides he didn’t even know how I felt about him, or that I was even gay. There was no way he felt that way.
“You know you can tell me anything, even if you think it’s not what I want to hear. I’ll listen, that’s what friend are for.” I replied trying not to show my fear.
“What if I said I don’t want to be friends anymore?” Zander challenged.
“I would wish you a good life and tell you that I understand.” I said meekly, my voice shaking.
“And what if I said I wanted to be more then friends?” Zander continued.
By that point I was so lost in what he meant that I didn’t even bother coming up with an idea. I decided that it would be easier just to carry on with this conversation, even though it didn’t make much sense to me.
“I would ask you what you meant by that” was my mild response, I was starting to get excited about what he was saying. In more than one way.
“And what if I could show you better than I could tell you?”
“Then show me” was all I got out of my mouth before his lips attached to my own.
I didn’t respond for a few moments, I was completely shell shocked. He pulled away before my lips could do what my heart wanted them to. But my brain said it was a good thing, he was probably just joking around with me. I looked into his eyes and saw the truth. This wasn’t a joke and he was hurting.
“Zander….” I started
“Yeah” he replied meekly
“Why did you kiss me?” I blurted. I was completely aware of how close he was to me. That wasn’t what I was planning on saying but that’s all I could get out, my brain was mush from the pleasure I was feeling. I was on top of the world; Zander had kissed me, the thing I had been dreaming about for years had finally come true.
End of flashback
I kept my distance as I entered the theater. I wasn’t going to let him have his way this time. I wouldn’t do it. I couldn’t do it.