Ariana
I sat on Nicole's bed with a smile a mile wide. Nadine and Nicole were in rapture with my story, but I didn't include our recording session. It was just too much. It was enough that I was sharing everything else.
"I just can't believe I sat there listening in on Justin and Notting talk about me. It was like, surreal, to say the least." I swooned onto the bed. "Justin admitted to writing love songs about me and I had to hold my breath. You could have probably heard a pin drop it was so quiet when they weren't speaking."
"No freaking way!" Nicole gasped. "I would of passed out for sure."
"I would of shit myself." Nadine laughed.
I looked at Nadine, wondering what it was like for her and Chris. She just had to be doing it with him by now.
"Nadine. What's it like?" I asked flat out.
"What?"
"Don't act stupid. You've gotta be doing it with him. He's all over you."
"We only make out. You know, heavily, over and under the clothes touching." She admitted. "But don't get me wrong, if I wasn't so scared of getting pregnant, I would. He's to die for."
"La la la la la!" Nicole sang out. "I really don't wanna hear how you'd like to do the dirty with my brother."
We all laughed out loud.
"I full on touched his junk. It's crazy how big it gets." I admitted and stuffed my head in a pillow.
The girls squealed.
I sat there thinking if I should share every other little detail.
"Oh look at her. She's day dreaming about Justin and his snake." Nicole teased.
I gasped, grabbing the pillow and hit her with it. I felt the heat rise in my face. I shouldn't have shared that bit of info with them.
"Aw, come on, we're just teasing you." Nadine jabbed.
"Whatever," I said, staring defiantly at Nicole. "So, what's your story? Nadine and I always spill the beans about our encounters. You never share about Grant."
"It's the same," She said simply and shrugged, trying to avoid sharing too much. "Obviously he's not as advanced in the sex arena as Justin and Chris. I mean come on he is only 15, and I like it that way."
I actually agreed with her remark. It must be nice and way less intimidating to be on the same playing field.
"What's Matt been up to?" I asked. I couldn't help it. Every time Grant's name was mentioned, I thought of Matt, they went hand in hand.
Nicole shrugged. "He's been hanging with Greg, you know, since we've all kind of have boyfriends. He hates to hear about it," she said looking straight at me. "You know you really crushed him."
My mouth hung open. "What, it's not like I wanted to hurt him." I replied. "I mean, I didn't have a choice. I can't help how I feel inside."
"He doesn't see it that way. He thinks it's cause you wanna be popular."
I was shocked and hurt. What was I supposed to say to that? Of course Matt thought that, and I'm sure lots of other jerk offs did too.
"So, what did you say to him when he said that?" I was curious.
Nicole gave a worried look. "Well, I don't really say anything at all. Don't be mad at me, please. I just don't wanna argue with him because it makes Grant edgy and then we'll fight."
"Oh, okay. Real nice," I huffed, folding my arms to my chest. "So basically you not saying anything just makes him think you're on his side."
I was pissed and hurt. Of all people I thought Nicole would have my back. Nadine sat with her mouth clamped tight glancing back and forth at us.
"It's not like he's so far off base..."
"What!" I screamed. "I can't believe you just said that! What's going through your head? I mean really, Nicole."
"Well, you did say in the beginning how cool it would be for us to walk on campus the first day of school...."
I stood up, staring down at her. I was so shocked at the bullshit that was spilling from her mouth. "You told him, didn't you?" I said interrupting her.
"I, I didn't mean to make it sound like that. We were just talking about relationships and I mentioned how cool it was that you...how popular you think you'll be..." she stammered on.
I started shaking. "Those are the words you used? How popular I think I'll be? You're a freaking idiot, Nicole!"
"You know what, Ari, screw you!" Nicole spat. "I've always supported you, giving you a new look, helping you with your clothes, letting you borrow stuff that helped you get Justin! How dare you!"
I was more than livid. My mind raced looking at her, with her long blond hair and stupid preppy-girl outfit. She was the epitome of a dumb blond. No wonder she didn't get it.
"It doesn't surprise me. You're probably jealous or something...or just too dim." I fumed. "Some friend you are."
I grabbed my bag and stormed off toward the door.
"You know, they're right about you. You do think your shit doesn't stink, now." Nicole yelled. "Matt's too good for you anyway, he deserves someone better than you. You're nothing but a user."
I couldn't believe my ears. Nicole must have been beside herself listening to my stories about Justin. She just had to find a way to burn me, because she was jealous. I bet they sat around talking shit about me while I wasn't there. I just knew it. I felt it in my bones. I couldn't believe Nadine just sat there staring at me like an idiot. She obviously felt the same way. She was probably the most jealous, since she had her eye on him first. Now it all became clear. No wonder Nicole and Grant disappeared last night.
I felt totally and utterly betrayed. I didn't know if I should scream or cry. Justin was leaving me for what felt like forever and my two best friends were choosing Matt over me.
Approaching my house, I spotted Mike in front of Justin's house. A big huge trailer was hitched to the back of a big white van. Notting was there too. They were loading gear into it. My heart started to race thinking of the text message he sent me last night. I never replied. I hurried up my driveway, but I wasn't quick enough, he spotted me.
"Hey Ari," Mike called out, waving.
He was actually smiling a real smile, not that I think I'm the shit grin he always wore.
I waved back at Mike. He looked over toward the garage and waved for me to come over. My heart sped. I walked over slowly and worried Notting would come back out.
"Hey," I said with a crooked smile.
"You mad at me?" he asked, with a somber look in his eyes.
"Where's Justin?" I said looking around uncomfortably.
"What, you don't know where you're boys at?"
I gave him a tight stare and ignored him. What game was he trying to play with me? Our eyes danced with each other for a long moment and it made me uneasy. I looked away.
"Just wanted to say sorry again," he said thoughtfully. "Justin seems to think I've got some hidden agenda."
Uh, yeah he does. My curiosity got the best of me. "About what?"
Mike hung his head, laughing softly. I got the impression he was embarrassed and it made me smile.
"He thinks I want to corrupt you or something."
"And he said that to you?" I asked. I was stunned by his honesty.
"Not in those words, but pretty much that's what he said." He nodded. "So, really, I'm sorry, if that's the idea I gave you."
I most definitely looked at him in a new light now. I didn't like to judge people based on other people's ideas. Sure he was a party boy, but who wasn't, really. My brother locked in the drunk zone last night and didn't even come home. It couldn't be all that bad.
"Thanks, I think Justin's just trying to protect me from myself." I sniffed.
"Yeah, but we're all young. Being serious will come soon enough when we graduate." He smiled. "You need to live your life how you want to. I'm gonna have a good time as long as I can."
"Yeah."
"Don't let him control you, Ari. If you wanna have a good time and experience life, do it." He smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "We're only young once."
Notting came out through the garage door calling out Mike's name. Mike became ridged, standing taller. I backed away saying good-bye and waved at Notting in hopes of a kind response. His demeanor was cool, but he waved.
I walked back to my house and sent Marshall a text, begging for him to get back to me.
Marsh, where are u! I need u, u'll just die! I'm gonna go to the beach and feel sorry for myself.
***
I threw myself onto my bed. I wanted to sink into the fibers and never feel anything again. I wanted to be an inanimate object so the hurt wouldn't hurt so badly. I felt a void I'd never felt before ever in my life. My best friend turned into a jealous back stabber and my boyfriend was gone, hanging out with skeezies all over half the country.
My brain ran in high gear and my stomach sank when I thought of the last two volleyball practices I'd missed. I'm surprised neither of my parents said anything, surprised the coach hasn't called yet. I would miss practice again next weekend too if I was going to attend the shows. I schemed to figure out a way. The ping of my phone brought me to the present; I grabbed it praying it was Marshall – it was Mike.
for both our sakes, don't share too much with Justin about our talk. I don't need the drama, and neither do you. M.
I felt guilty, like I was doing something wrong, but I wasn't. I was only being friendly and Mike was right, we're only young once. I smiled reading his text. I liked that he liked me, that he treated me like I wasn't a freshy. I was who I was, and he was cool with that, he gave me the courage to be rebellious. I decided to text back.
I agree. Have fun on tour. Hopefully I'll see you guys next weekend.
Mike texted right back:
Hope to see you there. Text anytime if you have a hard time getting ahold of Justin. It can get iffy and busy .M.
I smiled. See, he wasn't so bad after all, I thought.
Thanks.
***
I couldn't remember the last time I walked down to the beach alone. I felt disconnected, like I was floating down the street. I looked around to see if I might know someone on one of the volleyball courts, but I didn't. It would have been nice to grab a game.
I stepped into the warm sand and flashed back to my time with Justin at the beach. I remembered how our wet bodies rubbed together, smooth and cool; the way his body glistened and his electric blue eyes smiled at me. I began to cry. Sniveling as I treaded through the sand. I laid out my towel as far away from anyone as I could find and threw myself face first into it, sobbing like someone died.
Marshall finally replied to my earlier text message and made his way down to my side.
"Aww, Ari, sweetie." He smiled warmly. "Your nose is as red as a tomato," he said and pinched the tip of it.
I couldn't help but laugh. "I'm sure."
I spilled my guts to Marshall. Feeling weird at first, because we were really never that close. I hoped I wouldn't scare him away with all the drama. He hung on every word, consoling me every chance he could.
No matter what, Marshall always looked way fashionable, other than Sienna he had it down. I admired his cut off jeans that frayed right above the knee with layered tanks and a really sheer collard shirt. His hair was loose and tied back with a signature bandana, and he had these thick, tiny hoop earrings in each ear. He was masculine and feminine all at the same time.
"Dude, I like your outfit." I complimented, reaching out touching the shirt. "Where do you find your clothes? I envy your style."
He giggled. "I shop at thrift stores, these little boutiques when there are sales and I go to the outlets. I couldn't stand the clothes my mom wanted me to wear." He explained. "She still has a hard time dealing with my way of being."
"How's your dad with it?" I was curious. "You don't have to talk about it if it's uncomfortable."
I watched his delicate features toss between wretchedness and resignation. "No, He's okay. I am who I am, I can't help it." He smiled thoughtfully at me. "I knew I wasn't like the other boys as far back as I can remember." He shrugged, matter of fact.
"I'm sorry if asking was that too bold," I said crossing my legs underneath me, flicking sand off my knees.
"So, you wanna hear a theory I have?" he asked with a tight smile spreading across his face, like he had a secret.
"What?" I whispered, like someone was gonna hear me.
"I think Bobby's gay," he said with confidence, like he wasn't kidding.
I looked at him with wide-eyes and a laugh popped out that I didn't expect. Marshall was crazy. It must be because he was crushing on Bobby or something.
"Come on, Marsh," I said, bewildered. "I don't mean to laugh, I'm sorry."
The look Marshall's face told me he was embarrassed. He looked away from me and now I felt like a jerk.
"I get it. He doesn't come off like I do," he said, making his case. "But why else would he ask for my number?"
My heart stopped. No freaking way. I wondered if Justin knew.
A/N:
filler sorry! :(
but Mike wants some of the booty tho hmmm
thanks for reading my story y'all
love you xo