"It's the kind of kiss that inspires stars to climb into the sky and light up the world."
― Tahereh Mafi, Ignite Me
It's past midnight. I can't stop thinking about Sieger and the kiss we just made a while back. Unlike the first kiss we had on the lake, it was more passionate. It was short and almost a smack, but It felt deeper. There's something to it that my heart can't explain. It is just wonderful how simple things seemed to be but it is a lot more complicated than it should. Sieger is my first boyfriend, well at least my first official boyfriend. A lot of boys fell in love with me but Sieg is different from them, I fell in love with him and not the other way around. The first time I saw him in the track, I thought of being us already. The moment I saw him is the moment I saw our future together, as if it was a deja vu.
So, I used my magical flirting skills just to catch his attention and damn! It worked. I thought he was straight and I have low chances of winning this fight but hey guess what? I won again.
We had a lot of differences, he prefers fries with mayo over frikandel, he prefers a dog over a cat, blue over orange, Danny de Munk over Lil Klein, and million more differences. But we have two things that we like in common, running and us. After all, all that matters is our likeness and not our differences, for differences are just excuses not to love and these excuses need to buried 6 feet in the ground.
Where am I again? Uhm, Yes, Sieg is indeed a keeper. There are so many reasons to love him I can't even enumerate it. I feel bad for wishing him to die of cancer the moment I knew that he's dating someone over me, which is a girl named Jessica. And oh, I wished that girl to die of cancer too but I felt sorry for that the moment Sieg told me that he loves me more than her and she's just a prop. And yes, I feel bad for her too, It is not easy to be left there hanging. But that's life pals, life is unfair sometimes but we should learn to move on, instead of staying where you stuck up.
My phone rang.
"Hello."
"Oh hey Sieger Why are you calling?."
"Jessica's asking me to meet her tomorrow, at 10 am. Should I go?"
"Why?"
"She wants to talk to me, she's asking me when are we going to be legal."
"Then go and tell her that you have me now."
"What about her feelings?"
"Goddamnit, Sieg, does that matter for you?"
"Yes, what if she'll tell her friends that I ditched her over a guy?"
"Well, that's out of our control. You just told me a while back that she'll understand right?"
"That's what I thought too, but let's play safe. I really wanted her to tell the truth so she'll stop pestering me."
"But you asked her first right? I'll be honest to you, we are f*cked up."
"I'll just try to explain to her."
There was a moment of silence, I heard him sigh in the other line.
"I'm here for you. Whatever happens you'll never lose me, I promise you. I love you."
"I love you too. Did I disturb your sleep?"
"Ah no, I'm still up."
"Why?"
"I'm thinking of you."
"Oh! How sweet. That's why I can't sleep, old folks say if someone is thinking of you there is a big chance that you can't sleep."
"Sieg, You know how much I want to talk to you right now, but can't we make it tomorrow? I'm afraid Neeltje will wake up because of our talking. I'm afraid that my parents will over hear too. I love you goodnight."
"Okay, I love you again. I'll never get tired of saying this."
And the other line was silent.
I'm looking for my spare pillow to hug, as I said a while back, things looked so simple as it seems, but we don't have an idea of how complicated it is. But loves works in mysterious ways, and I hold on that phrase. It's a long and tiring day, yet it is very memorable for me. I won two times today, The race and Sieger which will I keep on my heart forever.