I was currently weighing up how well I would do in prison, carrying out a life sentence for mass murder sounded extremely appealing right about now.
If I had to hear one more story of how great the new Gucci bag was or what a tragedy it is when you scuff your new Louboutin's, I was going to do serious jail time with a zero amount of guilt.
"This will never happen again." I growled into Daniels's ear who sat next to me, looking like he had won the lottery. Not only was he the only male sat on a table of stunning women, something that brought a lot of eager eyes our way, he was also enjoying my annoyance towards the whole evening.
I had wondered when I first got here why security wasn't invited but I knew it was because Daniel simply wanted to look like a hot shot.
"I'm planning on making this an annual thing. It's going great." Daniel replied back with a huge grin, biting into his overpriced steak.
"Well fucking count me out, this is torture."
"Has anyone ever told you that you curse like a sailor?" He winked.
I flipped him off and continued my little pity party, moving my salmon around the plate and glaring at everyone that shared the table with me, 28 other girls, all doing the same job I did. Yet there was one major difference, they all got on with each other and surprise, surprise... hated me. Just like I hated them. I trained most of them but after that I just let them get on with whatever they wanted to do next. Some of them did try to be friends with me, but I just wasn't interested.
Plus, when most of them found out I used to be homeless, they avoided me like the plague anyway. Most of the girls here, not all of them, were from privileged backgrounds and had major daddy issues. I had daddy issues also, but I had issues with everything. They just wanted to piss off their families and make money until their account was full again, not that they would ever admit that to Daniel.
But hey, I didn't judge. I did however, dislike all of them and the attitude they always presented me with.
I heard Daniel tap his knife lightly on his glass to gain everyone's attention and all the talk that had developed suddenly seized. I rolled my eyes and sat back in my chair, here comes the speech.
"Ladies, MY ladies. I'll keep this short and sweet. I just wanted to thank you for all attending this celebration tonight for five good years of business! I never thought when I started this little venture and had this idea, that it would ever turn into what it is now and I have all you to thank. Now raise your glass and drink to many more years of success and a lot more money!" He chuckled as he raised his glass and we all followed.
I drained my drink quickly as the chatter started again and knew now was the perfect time to leave and return home. "Daniel, I'm leaving now." I told him as I gathered my things and stood up to leave.
"I knew you would leave after I made my speech, but it's fine, I suppose I have kept you here long enough. Keep me updated on our little project and I'll speak to you soon." He replied in a hushed tone before he kissed me on my cheek.
"What project?" I heard a voice speak up next to Daniel, he obviously hadn't been as hushed as he had thought.
"It's fine Imani, it doesn't concern you." Daniel simply relied, going back to finishing off his food. I turned to leave when I heard her speak up again.
"Daniel, you never tell me anything anymore. Why does she get all the attention and special treatment? I started only months after she did and now you're whispering about projects." Imani stated which made me roll my eyes, she was such an attention seeker.
"I said it doesn't concern you, so drop it." Daniel grit out and I could see he was getting more frustrated as she continued to push the issue. I turned to leave for a second time, I couldn't be bothered with the drama.
I walked out of the restaurant and towards my car, so glad to be out of there. I just wanted my dog and my bed.
"Elle!" Somebody shouted from behind me. I turned to see it was Imani running after to me as fast as she could in her six inch heels. I was so close to freedom I internally thought.
"Imani, can I help you?" I sighed.
"You didn't say bye to any of the girls."
"So? I'm not going to pretend to like people I don't. Now what do you really want, because I'm sure you didn't chase me out here to discuss dinner formalities." I bluntly spoke.
"Do you know what your problem is? You think you're so much better than the rest of us, you egotistical bitch. Whatever you have going on with Daniel, I'll find out. Why do you always get the special treatment? You speak to him however you want with no backlash, while we would get shouted at! And now he's giving you secret projects he won't tell anyone else about. I hate-"
"Are you done? I'm bored of you and tired of you and just about had enough of your talking."
"Are you sleeping with him? Because you should know I started sleeping with him way before you." She suddenly admitted, surprising me.
"I most definitely am not sleeping with him and I won't be anytime soon." I replied truthfully, the thought almost made me sick. "Now, I have to leave."
"You'll get what's coming to you one day, you whore." She bit out, before turning and marching back to the restaurant, her blonde hair flowing behind her.
"Bitch, aren't we both whores? It's pretty much in our fucking job description!" I shouted after her, laughing.
God, I hated her. I couldn't wait to get home.
*****
"Keep your arms up firmly Naya! They block the hits." I shouted as I continued my advance towards her.
"It hurts! Don't hit so hard." She panted out as she tried her best to dodge my hits.
"Don't be such a baby, do you think a real attacker cares if 'it hurts'? They won't give up."
"Okay, stop! Stop! ELLE! Time out!" She screamed before I stopped myself and pulled back. "It's our second session Elle, can you please just not push so hard? I'm still learning."
I knew today I was lost in a trance but I had a reason. It was bad however, that I had taken it out on Naya.
"I'm sorry Naya, I have a lot on my mind today. I'm sorry I took it out on you." I apologised as I took a long swig from my water and wrapped my towel around my shoulders.
"Hey, it's all good. We all have those days. Do you want to grab a coffee or something?" She asked with a smile. Sometimes it was hard to believe she was only 17.
"I'd love to but not today. I have to be somewhere. How about next time?" I replied before shoving my things into my bag.
"Yeah sure! I'll text you later in the week and hopefully you'll try not to kill me at our next session." She laughed as she gathered her own things and we made our way out of the gym halls.
"Of course, no problem. I'll see you later Naya." I waved her goodbye as I got into my car and made my way home to quickly shower and change before I had to head out again.
It was only an hour later I was on the motorway driving to the one place I didn't enjoy visiting and didn't want to go to but I went anyway, every damn month.
The hour long drive soon passed and I was pulling into Beechwright Clinic, a clinic that housed women, women with mental disorders. I pulled my car into a spare space and made my way to the reception.
This place was good value for the money that I paid. It was set in the countryside and was an old manor house that they turned into a clinic, it was private and well looked after. I greeted the receptionist with a small smile and showed her my ID and gave her my name.
"She's in her room Miss. Dominic, do you know where it is or would you like an escort?" She questioned me politely.
"I know where it is, thank you." I told her before making my way down the white corridor, seeing curious eyes follow me as I walked.
I knocked on the door once before stepping inside and standing just beside the door.
"You're here again, same time every month. Even after you say you're not going to visit again." The voice spoke to me without turning around from window.
"Hello to you too, mother." I sighed as I walked closer towards her and pulled a chair next to her own.
"I thought you meant it last time when you told me you wouldn't visit again." She spoke as she turned her head to face me. Her eyes, the exact same shade as my own staring back at me.
"Well I'm here now, so please refrain from your smug comments. How is everything, still taking your medication?"
"Ah yes, my medication. You would just hate it if I wasn't taking my precious medication wouldn't you?" She proclaimed as her eyes danced over my face and body.
"Let's not start. It's for your own benefit that you take that medication. You have a mental disorder mother, you seem to forget that." I replied.
A loud bang resonated around the room and I shot up from my chair, realising my mother had banged her hand harshly against the window.
"Then why won't you let me out of this place. Why do you keep me here? I want to be out! I want to be out now!" She shouted as a nurse suddenly appeared in the doorway.
"Everything okay in here? Elle, does this visit need to be over?" She politely asked looking at me, rather than my mother.
"Everything's fine." I smiled as the nurse glanced between us once more before she turned and left.
"You know why you can't leave here. Last time I signed you out of here, you went off your medication, sold it to teenagers so that you could use the money for alcohol and nearly drunk yourself to death. You have bi-polar disorder! If you stayed on your medication, I wouldn't have a problem signing your release papers but you can't be trusted!" I warned as I paced the room.
"Why do you care if I die? You come here once a month and when I look at you all I see is the disgust you have for me, not love that a daughter should give a mother." She announced, which me made me laugh sarcastically.
"Because you're still my mother. I will not be responsible for your death no matter how much I don't like you. I visit you because you're still the women that gave birth to me." I admitted as I sat back down in my seat and enjoyed the view of the gardens around the property.
"And why is it, my Precious Elle, that you don't like me?"
"You know why!" I shouted before she suddenly grabbed me by my face and pulled me to her, her nails digging into my flesh, our noses touching.
"You blame me but it was never my fault!" I tried to shake her hold but she held onto my face firmly.
"You never acted like my mother, you acted like nothing. You pretended not to know anything but I know that you knew and you let it happen." I spat at her. "Now get your hands off of me."
She continued to look directly into my eyes for a further minute before her hard grip on my jaw relented and I rubbed the sore area.
"I should let you rot out on the street, you should go through what I did when I was only 18 years old. You should know what it feels like to be cold, hungry and alone! You should feel every ounce of pain I endured all throughout my childhood!" I screamed as my anger rose to levels that only my mother could create.
"You mean until you started to use your body in order to get things?" She stated calmly but I could hear the smug satisfaction in her voice. "Your father would be ashamed of his whore of a daughter."
I stood and made my way over to the back of my mother's chair and pulled it harshly away from the window before moving to stand in front of her, caging her in with my hands on either side of the chair.
"You think you know me? What I do? You don't know anything." I seethed. "You think I care that I didn't go to university and get a degree? You think I care that I've never had a boyfriend and lost my virginity to a random man in order to steal and make money from it? You think I care about any of that anymore? No I don't! I did what I had to do in order to keep on living and now I'm living better than you ever will. I don't care if dad would have been ashamed, he was dead to me the moment I walked out of that house, now he really is dead, rotting in the ground where he belongs."
My breath came out in heavy pants and I stared long and hard into my mother's face, a face that had always been beautiful but didn't show any of the horror she had going on inside. I finally pulled away and made my way to the door.
"Is this where you say you won't be visiting anymore?" I heard my mother speak before I stepped out of her room.
"Oh I'll be visiting and I'll keep visiting. Until, one day, long in the future, I arrive here and they tell me you don't have long left, that you're dying and that day... Will be the best fucking day of my life, knowing you died in here, a place that you always hated." I spat before I slammed her door and strode to my car.
As soon as I got into my car I hit the steering wheel hard and screamed. I hated her, she knew how to push me, how to make me lose control.
I drove home in a flurry and I was thankful I knew that Brooke wouldn't be in the house, she was still at her own mum's. Who I'm sure was a wonderful person, everything a mum should be.
When I arrived home I headed straight for the shower and turned it to the highest heat setting. I removed my clothing, and stood under the spray, letting the heat punish my back, punish me. I enjoyed the pain as it made me forget.
I stood there for another five minutes before I turned it down and slid down the shower, just sitting there staring at the wall.
I don't know how much time passed by before I exited the shower and made my way into my bedroom, where Salem was waiting for me.
"Hey buddy." I greeted him with a small smile as I sat down next to him. He licked at my arms and face and barked once before settling back down.
I grinned at his behaviour, when he was just a puppy he used to love licking the water off my feet when I had finished showering and it reminded me of that. He had been a gift for me from Tyrese. When I had first started, he could see how alone I felt and hoped Salem would fill the void. He was the best gift I had ever received.
I rubbed my tender skin with aloe as it was burnt from my time in the shower and slid on a huge shirt from my gym. I planned on hibernating for the rest of the day, my energy levels had dropped immensely after meeting with my mother.
"Come on S, dinner time." I told him as we made our way to the kitchen where I poured him out some food and water. I made my own sandwich and orange juice before I took myself to sit on the balcony and soak in the view.
*****
Knock. Knock. Bark.
Knock. Knock. Bark.
I groaned as I rubbed my eyes and pulled myself off the sofa, feeling the tenderness in my back. It was around 9PM and I guessed I must have fallen asleep watching TV after coming in from the balcony earlier.
Whoever it was had better have a good reason for knocking at 9 at night I thought to myself.
I made my way to the door and Salem stood by my side waiting for whoever was on the other side to appear.
"What?" I growled as I swung open the door.
"Ah, Miss. Dominic, where are your manners?" Roman greeted me with a smrik before Salem pounced forward and bit him directly on the ankle, hard.
Oh, shit. I was definitely getting sued.