A gut wrenching pain woke me from my sleep. At some point during my nap I had rolled onto my injured shoulder. I tried to ease the pain that lanced through it. I tested it gingerly as I got up and felt a twinge. Nope I won't be using that arm for fighting any time soon, I thought. I folded the warm blanket with my good arm, the faint scent of Toshiro still lingered on it.
I stood at his door and knocked softly but there was no answer. He must be out, I thought. Chancing a glance into his room, I confirmed my theory. I left the blanket folded at the foot of his bed. A book on his dresser caught my eye and I held my sides in an attempt to contain my laughter. The good captain must have filched a copy of 'Shinigami Love' from my room when I wasn't looking. I was going to give him so much crap about it the next chance I got.
It seemed that I was the only one around as the house was pleasantly quiet. I took the advantage of being its sole occupant by having a long and much needed shower. I let the water wash over me, feeling the heat pull the aches from my body. I grabbed a clean plush towel and enveloped myself in its warmth, heavily debating crawling back into bed. Deciding that that course would be a colossal waste of a day, I busied myself with putting on clothes and fixing my hair.
I heard the front door bang shut. When I looked over to see who had entered, I saw a very dejected shinigami.
"What's the matter Kensei? You look like someone ate all of your birthday cake." I remarked as I re-bandaged my shoulder.
He grabbed the gauze out of my hand. "I was just out with Rangiku. I thought I could show her a few fighting techniques against hollows but she killed them before I could even draw my sword. I mean she's just...,"he stared at the ceiling dreamily.
"An independent woman who's the same rank as you and therefore perfectly capable of defending herself?" I muttered. " Would you like me to get Murray so you two can fight over her?" I winced as he tied the bandage a little too tight, ignoring my jest.
"What did you do to get this little scratch, huh? Did you fight with a squirrel over an acorn?" He retorted.
I punched him in the arm. "Is that the sound of insubordination I hear? I'm almost certain I saw a broom in the closet over there. I could remedy that." I tried to maintain my serious composure but failed miserably. We both dissolved into giggles.
He held a hand to his nose in mock humour. "Anything but that, captain!" He chuckled.
I grabbed my coat and scarf from the back of the chair in the living room. "I'm starving. Let's grab something to eat and you can brief me on your day," I suggested.
He gestured for me to leave first. "Sure, why not. I know a nice little place down the street."
***
The building was quaint and cozy. Cliche little signs that said things like 'this is how we brew it' and 'not just your average joe', hung along the walls. Little shelves were haphazardly placed, filled to their limits with books. The tables were eclectic and worn, adding a rustic feel to the atmosphere.
"I'll have a turkey sandwich with mustard," I said to the barista behind the counter. I fished out some money from my pocket to pay. "Kensei, do you want anything?" I turned to look at him. He said nothing. He was attempting to hide something funny, judging by the way he bit his lip. I gave him a cross look. "Suit yourself then," I muttered, "how much is it ma'am?"
She looked at me like I had three heads. I glanced over at Kensei, who was continuing to stifle his giggles. "It's five... dollars... miss," she said very slowly.
The exchange felt rather odd, I handed my change to her and mimicked her. "Thank... you..." I gave her a dumb look. With Kensei in tow, I grabbed my food and found us a booth by the window.
"Nice place you picked out Kensei," I remarked as I looked around. I picked up my sandwich and took another bite. "Are you sure you're not going to order anything? I don't mind paying really. Though I don't know what the baristas problem was. She was gave me a funny look when I asked you what you wanted."
He bit his lip, fighting off a smile. "No that's quite alright captain, you just enjoy your sandwich." His voice cracked as he bit down on his knuckles, trying not to laugh.
I dropped the sandwich on my plate. "What the hell is so funny lieutenant? You could at least let me in on the joke."
Several pairs of curious eyes gazed at me, a few people looked like they wanted to say something. "Can I help you?" I barked out at them, feeling a little irritated. I stuffed my sandwich down my throat and chased it with a bottle of water. "God people can be so rude," I muttered.
Kensei burst into laughter and slapped the table with his hand. I snatched his arm and yanked him out of the cafe. I turned around and gave the patrons the full extent of my rage. "For future reference, when two people are trying to have lunch, it's rude to stare," I snapped. Kensei fell on the floor, giggling like a school girl; I kicked his ass out the door head first.
"Care to let me in on your private party there, Kensei," I tapped my foot impatiently.
He got up and wiped his face, giggling every time he attempted to talk. "Captain," he took a deep breath to quash his laughter, "you're in your gigai currently."
I stared at him. "Thanks for stating the obvious, lieutenant. Did I somehow magically turn into a human sized toad?"
He shook his head fervently as he tried to explain. "Well you see, captain, I'm not currently in mine. So the humans can see you... but they can't see me," he dodged my fist nimbly.
"Are you saying I just spent the last hour in there talking to myself like a crazy person?" I stared daggers at him.
He rolled on the ground roaring with laughter. I jammed my hands in pockets and stomped away from him towards the park across the street, throwing a few choice curse words in his direction. Several people stopped and watched me curiously. I halted my rampage and glared at one of them. "If I want to talk to myself I'm damn well entitled to, got it?" I continued my march.
I heard his panicked voice, trying to catch up to me. "I'm sorry captain, I won't do that again! I promise." I popped a soul candy into my mouth and ejected out of my gigai.
He balked.
"What are you going to do?"
I grinned darkly. "You asked for it lieutenant. It's sparring time."
"Oh shit," he muttered.
I drew my blade and summoned Murasame. He bowed gracefully and regarded Kensei with a measure of curiosity. "What did he do this time, master Akira?" He sighed.
I lit the bellows and fanned the flames. "He insulted your honour, Murray. He doesn't think you're worthy of Rangikus affections." He unsheathed his sword and strode over to Kensei.
"Is that so?" He grinned evilly, licking his blade. "We'll see about that."
He launched into the air and came down on Kensei like a bat out of hell. As he blocked his attack, Kensei threw me a pleading look.
"Why captain?" Kensei whimpered. "You knew I was just kidding, right?"
"Of course you were and so am I but Murray needs to burn off energy once and a while and it's not like I can walk him like a dog. So thanks for volunteering yourself!" I winked. I climbed up the nearest tree to enjoy the show.
A crisp breeze kicked up and I looked over to see that Toshiro had joined me. Something about him was different, aside from the fact he was actually associating with me for the first time in two weeks. He opened his mouth to say something to me and then stopped. I watched him fidget with his jacket.
I folded my arms and leaned against the tree trunk, observing his behaviour. "What's up captain? You look like you're about to tell me something awful."
He sat up straight and feigned a smile. "I was about to ask why those two are fighting."
"Oh they're duking it out for Rangiku's affections," I deadpanned. I heard him laugh and I gave him a cross look. Did we just graduate to friendly conversation?
"They're aware that she's not interested in either of them, right?" He asked.
I shrugged. "They don't need to know that. I mean, do you want to deal with the fallout of that heartbreak? I sure don't."
"I suppose you're right." He let the conversation drop.
I watched the two men continue to spar below us. An uncomfortable silence began to grow between us. I tried to remember the last time we talked about anything that wasn't mission related.
"So how are-," I began.
"Listen I needed to-," he interjected.
I felt my face flush and I waited for him to continue. He took a moment to gather his thoughts. "I had a chat with Momo earlier today, while you were sleeping." He said slowly.
I couldn't help the disdain that painted my features.
"Anyways,' he continued, "I think you managed to get through to her. She admitted that she lied about your meeting and that you never laid a hand on her. She admitted that your were right about Aizen." He looked away from my glare.
I stared at him for a moment and then hopped out of the tree. Finding my gigai sitting on the ground where I left it, I merged with it. I was half way across the park when Toshiro grabbed my hand and stopped me.
"Aren't you going to say anything?" He shouted.
I spun around to face him. "I should be asking you the same thing," I snapped. "The first thing you should have done was apologize to me, but you didn't." He looked dumbstruck. "I'm also extremely pissed that Momo chose to talk to you before discussing the matter with her commanding officer who, if you care to remember, is me." I combed my fingers through my hair angrily, looking at the sky rather than the sad look he was giving me.
"I really am sorry," he spoke softly. He tried to reach for my free hand but I jerked it away.
"I don't think you understand how much you hurt me Toshiro. I really liked you and you broke my heart. No one deserves to be treated like that and you, above anyone else should know that. Yes I'm young and inexperienced but so were you at one point." I bit my lip to stop it from trembling.
The change in weather began to bite at my unprotected fingers. Snow gently covered the ground as we stood there in complete silence.
I couldn't contain the emotions began to spill out of me. "I'm not alone, okay? I have friends and family. They may not be my blood but they're family just the same. If you had taken the chance to get to know me, you'd know I'm not just some broken object." I felt hot tears roll down my face and drip off my chin. I wiped my cheeks furiously with my palms.
I could see the guilt in his eyes and I felt my resolve falter. "Akira," he breathed and stepped towards me.
Murasame appeared between us, concern etched into his features. He faced Toshiro. "Why is she crying, captain?" He asked.
I cut Murray off and pushed him away. "I'm a big girl Murray. I can handle this myself." He gave me a frown and reverted back into his sword form. I took a few cleansing breaths and addressed the captain. "Thank you for the apology, Toshiro, but I'm not ready to accept it."
He clenched his fists at his sides. "Take all the time you need. I'll be here when you're ready," he said softly.
Quietly, I picked up the blade and walked away from him.