I sulk away after that incident that just occurred with Niall. Do I listen to Niall and dump Liam just to make him happy? Or do I do what makes me happy which is stay with Liam? Is it really worth it to break the love of my life's heart just to make one guy happy? Why Niall why?!? Why must you make things so complicated? I'm so torn.......
"Hey," Zayn calls as he walks up to my side.
"Hi," I whisper.
"Everything alright?" Zayn asks.
"Just conflicted, that's all," I tell him.
"You wanna talk about it?"
"No, not really. I don't want to make you angry or upset before you go out on stage. I don't wanna screw up your performance," I mumble.
Is the reason why I feel so conflicted because I still have feelings for Niall? I wonder......
Probably not.......but would I really be thinking about this if I wasn't in love with Niall?
But then what about Rachel?
"Five minutes guys. Five minutes," a stage manager interrupts my train of thought as he continues running down the hall to inform the rest of the band.
"You better get going. You don't wanna be late," I tell Zayn.
"Y-yeah. I probably should," he stutters, not wanting to leave.
"Good luck," I whisper.
Zayn smiles and before I even get a good firm grasp as to what's happening, I feel Zayn's soft lips meet mine for a couple seconds before they are pulled away.
"Oh my god," Zayn and I mumble in unison.
It seems to me like Zayn didn't even realize what he was doing until it happened.....
Zayn quickly runs off to the stage entrance to join the rest of his band mates. Good, now I have a chance to think about all of this. I make my way to backstage and sit on the couch that they have set out for people who want to watch the show on the large flat screen TV they have out just for the show. I turn the TV on as I see Eleanor sit beside me on the couch.
"You don't wanna be out there watching your boyfriend?" I ask, not meaning to sound rude as though I don't enjoy her company.
"I can't stand all the screaming-"
"I know right!" I blurt, "it's so annoying. I wonder how the boys put up with it."
"Ear plugs," she responds.
"I don't think ear plugs are enough to block out the sound of the screaming girls completely," I tell her.
A few seconds pass and then the opening video for One Direction begins playing with the instrumental version of Up All Night playing in the background. This causes the girls in the audience to go wild knowing that they would get to see the loves of their lives in person in a matter of seconds. Eleanor and I spot the boys waiting by the side of the stage to go on when we yell good luck to them. They turn around and flash us a smile when I notice that Zayn never even moved. He didn't even looked when we yelled good luck. What got into him?
The boys run out on stage singing Up All Night, jumping around and acting like morons. Harry sings his solo, causing the girls to go nuts when he does his little hand motion when he says "people going all the way, yeah all the way". I smile, remembering the first time I fell in love with these guys. I always heard girls talking about them, but I never knew who they were. I never heard their song What Makes You Beautiful and when I heard girls gossiping about how Harry's like the most adorable thing to ever set foot on this planet I would look at them like a foreign person. I honestly had no idea who they were talking about. Then one day I cracked and finally decided to look up One Direction on YouTube to see what all the fuss about them was about. I clicked on What Makes You Beautiful and instantly fell in love with them. I never realized how much they changed my life until I look back on it now....
As the boys finish the chorus, Zayn's solo approaches. I stare at the screen to see if I could find any facial expressions in him but he looks completely out of it, almost in a trance. He looks like he has no idea as to what he's doing......
When it's Zayn's solo, no words come out of his mouth, he's just holding the microphone to his mouth, not singing anything, yet the band keeps playing. The boys and audience look at each other in dismay, not sure of what's happening. Zayn must've forgot the words. Oh my god he must be so embarrassed. It's the first show of their comeback tour and he forgets the words to his solo in Up All Night. This is gonna haunt him for the rest of his life, especially because it looks like half of the girls in the audience are filming the concert for themselves, their friends, and YouTube. Zayn just stares at the microphone the entire time, not wanting to make eye contact. Did I cause this?!?
Zayn looks at the rest of the boys, only to see that they all look concerned for him. He looks at the audience and in an instant he darts off the stage, not stopping to make eye contact with any of the guys. The boys just look at each other, dumbfounded as to what the hell got into Zayn. I watch as Zayn runs down the hallway at high speed, nearly running over a security guard along the way. I'm surprised the guy didn't stop him.
"Umm," Harry mumbles nervously, unsure of what to do now.
"Should we go get him?" Eleanor asks me.
"I doubt we'll find him," I shrug.
"He probably just went to his dressing room."
"We're gonna take a short break to go find Zayn," Liam states as he and the others run off stage in search of Zayn.
I take a peek at the audience from behind a curtain to see them just looking at each other, confused. They seemed to have all stopped recording now considering nothing's happening.
About ten minutes pass and still no sign of the guys or Zayn.
"Because of the recent incidents, tonight's concert will be postponed until tomorrow," Paul announces over the intercom, signaling that the shows over.
Eleanor and I glance at each other and then we decide to help everyone find Zayn. Whether the guys found her and they're talking to him or they boys are still searching for him I'm not sure.
I just hope he's OK......
But I bet he feels so embarrassed about this right now. I mean, this is gonna haunt him for the rest of his life.....
The question is how hard is he actually taking this right now? Is he just gonna shrug it off and laugh about it later? Or is he just gonna curl up into a ball, feeling as though he's gonna be made fun of for not being able to remember the words to his own solo?
Poor Zayn......