—three—
the first kiss
SHE BLINKED.
For someone who had heard so many jokes from Owen alone, Arthur's was the best of all. His was utterly ridiculous, if not bordering as an off-the-wall antic, it wasn't even funny.
"What?" was the only thing she could say, for she was dumbfounded at the wake of his words that might suggest his undying love for her.
Well maybe not, but...
Time just stood still then. Paige let the silence sit through as she waited for his answer, although immediately attempting to study his body language like a conversation. Was he serious? Should I let him kiss me? Oh, wait, no. I don't even know how to kiss. And if he does, then he would be my first kiss−
But when Arthur's face had begun to crack a puckish smile, it didn't take a genius to know that the joke was actually on her. The beginnings of her growing hope from his fake words of encouragement had abruptly shut off when his smirk escalated to a laughing fit.
Perhaps, yes, his question that simply bowled her over wasn't what she'd entirely expect to happen so soon. But this was Arthur Huxley, and the fact that he was merely fooling around hurt more than she let on.
"Right," she maundered with a chuckle that didn't really cover up the embarrassment written all over her face, or the awkwardness washing through her. Her eyes studied him through pained hooded lids as he continued to bark out a barrel of snickers, then she mechanically curled stray hairs behind her ear−a habit of hers whenever she felt thoroughly ashamed. Felt like she was the everlasting, biggest joke to ever exist, leaving her bruised and scarred in places only her heart could see. "Would you stop laughing?"
"You should've seen your face." He was beetroot red now, eyes in amused slits as he regarded her with much playfulness. "You're so gullible."
She wanted to tell him off, say something indignant, as the beginnings of rushing anger swept through her yet again. But deep down, she knew she shouldn't act on her impulses; so then she slowly recollected her bearings to weigh her emotions with a sound approach.
Pursing her lips before heaving a breath, she tilted her chin up a little but without the ego and smiled at him. "I guess I've been well-played, Huxley, since I did think you're nice." She crumpled her face which she'd hoped had shown her abhorrence when she added, "What I didn't expect was that you've more dick in your personality than in your pants."
Arthur blinked at him in utter surprise, since it was obvious he didn't see that one coming. For most of her life, people particularly reckoned her as someone so conventionally correct and timid that it somehow got to a point where they had to keep a wide berth from her, for fear of smearing the image they'd portrayed her as.
His mouth was still clamped shut as she undid her legs to stand up, even as she picked up her bag from the grass. Turning to him one last time with a smile on her face, she hitched the strap of her bag on her shoulder with a clenched fist.
"Shame the rumors aren't true. You are nothing but a cock and bull story, Huxley. It is not so nice meeting you."
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Her steps faltered by the door when she entered the classroom, seeing that Arthur had tore his eyes away from his notes then to her. Looking away, she advanced herself in the direction of her usual position in Finance and ignored him all the way through, even though his eyes were following her every move based on her peripheral vision.
The moment she sat down, she could very well hear her instincts telling her that he'd just switched positions with someone who was originally sitting behind her. If only just for the hell of it.
Good thing that their professor had stepped into the room and immediately started the lecture, which she was, at the time, immensely thankful for. It had rather helped her mind to turn away from his presence for a short while.
Paige had anticipated that opportunity to be somehow close to him she'd so richly desired months ago. But the meeting she had with him at the back lawn of the school theater made her feel like she'd been cheated at something.
But his silence was only just the calm before the storm. Because pretty soon, the hairs on her nape stood up when he hovered and whispered, "Hey." Their professor didn't prove to be much help this time round because she already had to try to not acknowledge Arthur by drawing haphazard shapes and swirls on her notebook. "Will you please talk to me?"
When he sensed that his words were falling on deaf ears, Paige heard him letting out a pregnant sigh. She glanced down at her notes briefly, mulling over the idea that if she could do this for a long while, she could forget about him altogether.
But she'd rejoiced at his withdrawal too soon.
Because her eyes eventually latched onto the tiny crumbled paper sitting on top of her desk. It didn't take her long to realize that it was from him; and much to her mind's disapproval from peering what was inside it, her heart told her otherwise.
She opened it.
I know I was being a jerk, but I hope you could make it to the library in our building this afternoon. I just want to apologize properly to you.
PS. You're beautiful when you're nice; hot when you're not.
Art x
Paige certainly didn't need to look in the mirror to know how red her face was, or even check the way her heart had shifted against her rib cage. For what particular reason, she wasn't still sure. Although from those two alone, there was no doubt that she was already condemned.
Crumpling the paper tightly in her hand, she cast a glance to the side and mentally scoffed at his audacity.
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After that note from him came another one a couple seconds later, telling her to meet him at around four in the afternoon in the library. But she'd been lingering at the parking area 'til past five and her mind still couldn't make up her mind. The ones who'd frequented the open area mostly had since long gone and this was a sign enough that the crowd throughout the rest of the campus had dispersed several minutes back.
So why was she still here?
She wasn't forgetting the fact that Arthur had practically hurt her pride, but she was still very much attached to her morals that she couldn't quite suppress that gnawing sensation inside her gut. Nevertheless, she couldn't tell if he was still there anyway since almost everyone were already out or in their respective night classes. And it wasn't like she was being waited by an avid fan because, really, if one had to be the follower here, it wouldn't be the guy.
She cranked up the engine of her car, only to turn it back off, letting out a groan of frustration as she took hold of the hand-wheel with a vice-like grip. As her conscience got the best of her, she hastily unlatched the door and swing it shut behind her, before beeping her remote in the direction of her car.
Her feet was practically dragging her because, to be honest, she was still reeling in hesitation−but there was no going back now, much less look behind her shoulder like premeditating an escape. What if he wasn't there any longer?
Oh, but what if he's still waiting for me? Am I even worth the wait?
The library wasn't that tough to locate. It was just within the third building from outside the bounds of the parking lot; but since the distance from where she'd been towards the said place was relatively far, her instincts compelled her limbs to race against time.
This was just as another one of those fairytale stories that ended at midnight. But this one was a lot more different all on its own. It was no twelve; in fact, she was long overdue for the rendezvous Arthur had set up for them. But she ran all the same. To him. And that was what really mattered to her at that very moment.
One professor had even called her out when she'd sprinted past one of the ongoing classes, saying 'no running inside the buildings', but she could hardly care less. Then pretty soon, her feet stepped on a landing that was situated right next to the entrance of this building's library.
She didn't waste a single second. Paige stumbled inside with a staccato breath escaping her lips, with lungs working twice as hard to make up for the air she'd lost. Her eyes scanned the library, slightly defeated when she couldn't catch a sight of him.
Furthering inside, her eyes landed on the lady who seemed to be her age, sitting behind the long, wooden cubicle which was tucked away at the corner of the entire room. Her nose was buried into a book, her short ebony hair cascading down the sides of her face as she pored over the words that probably demonstrated the taut muscles of the male main character, or how he'd expressed his sexual desires to a female counterpart.
An amused smile flitted across her lips.
Unsurely, she paced her way towards her and quietly cleared her throat.
"Excuse me?"
"Ài ya!" Paige widened her eyes, just as the girl reared back in stark horror as if she'd been infinitely traumatized. She was of Asian descent, as her slanted eyes, youthful small face, and dark, shiny hair would seem to suggest.
"I'm sorry," she said sheepishly. "I didn't mean to scare you, really."
She hurled her a flat look when she regained her composure, setting the book down. "What the heck? That's twice in a day. It's not even Halloween, for god's sake."
"I'm just trying to find something−"
"−someone," she quickly offered with a sarcastic undertone in her voice, looking at her in a bored manner. As blunt as she was, she didn't feel offended at all and instead, feel amused for that look she'd seen on her face minutes ago. In fact, she might just be the nicest person to hang around with in school, no matter how off that sounded. She tipped her chin forward, her eyes flickering to the aisles and aisles of books right behind her. "I think he's at the last or something. Pretty sure he always sits there."
A crease formed between her eyebrows. "I told you−I'm looking for something, not someone."
She snorted, her expression so close to throwing her a glare. "You're practically flogging a dead horse, miss. He'd been pissing me off to tell this girl where he's at, just in case she'd come." And then she shrugged with a nonchalant demeanor, while Paige had to rub her legs together as the girl raked her eyes from her head to toe. "I mean, I never thought the guy's pretty good in details. You've got him by the leash, girl."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
The girl waved at her dismissively. "Ugh, just go away." She turned to her book then suddenly blurted, "Kill him, Connor!"
"Oh." Paige blinked blankly in front of her, before staggering round as her eyes met the overwhelming amount of books kept within the shelves and around the whole room itself.
When she was a few arm's lengths away, Paige heard her say, "And no quickie in here, please!"
As she moved past the wide array of books came nervous breaths and hesitating steps, as she reached nearer and nearer to where he could possibly be. But when she finally got there, she couldn't see any signs of him; only if she hadn't looked around more.
And there he was, sitting at the narrow gaps between the walling supporting the book stands and the wall itself that separated them from the outside world. His head was resting against the wooden one and his eyes were closed; the serenity that masked his face indicated that the cold seeping from the floor was of no matter to him.
It was nice like that−to see him so at peace with his state of mind; that deep sense of calmness she'd always experienced when she meditated sometimes, her flaws and socially formed beliefs unknown to the rest of the world. There he seemed−simple; in spite of him wearing well-pressed, expensive clothes, a high-class wristwatch, neatly styled hair, and a clean pair of shoes.
Most of all, she liked the fact that she could stare at him for so long without him even knowing it.
Arthur sighed out of the blue and his shoulders descended heavily. That tugged something at her heartstrings. She almost forgot that he actually waited for her when he didn't really have to.
Paige made a large sigh of her own, before gradually lowering herself so they were somewhat face to face. Biting her lip, she painfully admitted to herself that she could never hate him. She'd already forgiven him just hours after that conversation they had at the back lawn because she wasn't one to hold grudges. Perhaps it was a blessing and a curse to be so openhearted in a world of make-believe.
She'd been hurt once, and that was not to say that there wouldn't be another one coming.
"Arthur," his name breathed out of her lips in a mellifluous manner, more than how she'd wanted it to be. But it wasn't worth retreating now.
When his lids cracked open, a slow recognition slipped through his features.
"Hey."
Paige returned his smile, although a little guarded, and brushed her hands below her rear as she positioned herself close to him so that her legs were crossed beneath her.
"What're you doing?" she asked, concern lacing her voice. She'd almost touched his shoulder but quickly decided against it just as fast as she'd thought of it. "People have gone home already and you're still here?"
He shrugged, running a frustrated hand through his hair. "Well, if waiting means I get to see you so I could make it up to you, I don't mind."
"You're an idiot." She shook her head gently, ignoring the amused tug of his lips. But she didn't miss the way her emotions softly sat into a puddle. "Just go home, seriously."
"Not if you won't accept my apology," he returned firmly, dead serious as his expression was. "Really, Cadwyn, I swear I'm not usually like that. I don't know. I just thought it'd be nice to tease you a little because..."
She evened her eyes to him questioningly. "Because...?"
He thinned his lips together, shaking his head. "Just because−I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd take that so seriously. But still, I apologize for what I've done. I know it was clumsy of me to throw words like that when we barely know each other."
"I understand," replied Paige, playing with the frayed ends of her jeans. "Words are, indeed, clumsy."
He made a slight nod. "So..." there was cautiousness in his voice, like he was afraid he would hurt her again somehow, "are we cool?"
After a moment's hesitation, she finally decided to tell him the truth. "Of course. I kind of overreacted, too, so...it's a thing of the past now."
The quirks of his lips was almost unnoticeable, but it was there. "I think it's only fair for us to introduce ourselves now the right way as we started on the wrong footing...Arthur Huxley."
Paige's lips curled up into an amused smile when she glanced down at his open palm. The anticipation that had been shrunk in the depths of her being had quickly sprung to life the moment their skins touched against each other. For the thousandth time, her instincts had never failed her. If she hadn't let the small voice inside her head take over−well, she didn't really want to know at this point.
"Paige Cadwyn."
His smirk was evanescent that she even thought it was simply an imagination. "I know."
She rolled her eyes then frowned when he stopped shaking their hands. His face suddenly turned back to his usual mask of indifference. So she said, "What?"
"I'm terrible at jokes, am I?" he inquired, as if it was serious business and that he desperately needed her opinion. "Take that one I said to you as an example."
"Yes," she scrunched her nose, "I totally agree with you."
"Right−because I wasn't joking at all."
There was a glint in his eye when he said that and she could hardly begin to decipher what he was going about. Because the next thing she remembered, he was already pulling her into him that rather stunned her in utter confusion. And even that couldn't seem to send her a warning signal before he crashed her lips to hers, making any actions completely impossible as her sense of rationality flew out of the window.
She didn't kiss him back. How when she was losing contact of the reality?
Never in her wildest dreams had she expected that this would happen. Arthur and her were worlds apart and hadn't spoken to each other in months. But like the swift kick of alcohol, her mind whirled into a haze, eyes fluttering shut while her thoughts completely drowned into that honeyed trance she'd fallen into; and finally, finally−she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back as deeply and as intoxicating.
It's better to be safe than sober.