I swear for a moment my heart stopped beating.
" I don't understand..." I trained off. This was impossible. Bobby was fine, he was fine back in Ireland.
" He was already taking heart medicine,It's complicated, mum won't talk about it" I heard Greg say between sobbing. I knew that they were all close. So close, and now they were only 3 left.
" Greg? When are you gonna tell me that you're joking? Please tell me now" I begged as I noticed that tears had build a wall over my eyes so everything was blurry.
" Marissa, I need you to tell Niall for me, I can't do it. This is too much for me to handle" It sounded like Greg was trying not to cry like a little hopeless baby. But he was welcome to do it. He was just talking to me. He could trust me.
" I can't do it either" I whispered and closed my eyes to let the tears leak down my cheek.
" I'm begging you" Greg said.
I sniffed up in my nose. How could I tell him? Niall would brake down.
" How many days do I have?" I asked. Maybe I could prepare or make sure that the kids weren't home, I don't know ? I wasn't even handling this to well either , how could I be strong for Niall?
" You have to tell him at least to night...It won't be long until the funeral is going to be and we need Niall and you to come over here and help us. Dad would like that...don't you think that Niall would like to say goodb...-" That's were Greg stopped.
I gasped a little. I knew what was happening. Greg was getting a reality check. His dad was gone forever and there was no turning back.
" I'll take care of this Greg alright? Be strong, for your mother" I said and tried not to cry so I wouldn't make Greg more upset then he already was.
" Okey" Was all he could say. He was in shock.
I spend few minuets on the bathroom after Greg hung up.
I took a look at Niall's phone to check the clock.
It was 16:55.
I took a deep breath and tried to dry away the tears before I opened the door.
" There you are ! " Amelia was standing in the stairs. " I was looking for you" She said and smiled.
" Is something wrong?" I asked and looked around.
" Nope, just wanted to tell you that I finished the fruit bowl, I love you too" Then she smiled Niall's prank smile and ran up in her room.
I felt better for few second after this but it didn't end long.
I walked into the living room where my boys were still sleeping.
Carefully, I took Michael up. He didn't wake up but Niall did.
" What is going on?" He asked sleepy.
Without saying a word, I walked upstairs with Michael to put him in his crib.
On my way back to the living room I couldn't help it but look at the family photos that were hanging on the wall.
And the biggest picture was taken when Maura, Greg and Bobby were here.
I took a deep breath and walked to the living room.
Niall was now sitting in the sofa and rubbing his eyes tired.
" What's the time? " He asked me as I sat down next to him.
" Niall..." How was I gonna tell him? This was horrible.
" What?" Niall asked and smiled. Just when everything was right, this had to happen. Niall was strong believe me, but was he strong enough to handle his father death?
The smile disappeared on Niall's lips when I looked down. I couldn't handle it to look into his innocent eyes.
" You've been crying?" He asked when he lifted my face up with his thumb.
" Wait...are you pregnant??" Niall asked and his eyes got wide up.
I couldn't help it to laugh softly but the tears didn't leave at all.
" I wish" I said and looked straight into Niall's eyes who looked worried by now.
" You know you can tell me" He said and took my hands.
" Oh Niall" I said and wrapped my arms around him and started crying.
" Wow wow wow what's wrong? " He asked as he stroke my back gently.
I tried to stop crying and looked at him.
Niall stroke the tears away with his thumb.
" It's your dad" I said.
Niall stopped drying the tears away.
" What about him?" He asked serious.
I took Niall's hand, that was resting on my face, and put it between mine.
" Bobby had a heart attack few hours ago" I said and looked up so the tears wouldn't leak down.
" So? He's gonna be fine, I mean....He's Bobby...Everybody likes Bobby..." Niall looked at me rather confused.
" Niall..." I said but Niall stood up.
" Yeah he's gonna be fine isn't he? Who told you this? Oh well that doesn't matter....That reminds me off that I was gonna phone him soon, I miss the old lad you know? My dad...my dad..." Niall walked back and forth , like he was going crazy.
I just stood there and watched him figuring out slowly what happened.
" One question" Niall said and stopped walking.
" Yes?" I almost whispered.
" If it happens that I want to phone him within 10 minuets, he's gonna pick up right?" Niall asked.
I didn't answer. I guess that was enough for him.
" There you have it" Niall said and smiled. He walked away.
" Where are you going?" I asked before he disappeared but he didn't answer.
I heard him talk to himself as he walked up the stairs.
This was too much for him. Way too much.
I called Liam and the lads to bring them the news. They all asked if they could come over but I told them that Niall needed some space and time for himself. Imagine how supportive and true friends we have?
It wasn't until the dinner was ready that I started worrying crazy.
I was feeding Michael mashed potato's and Amelia was playing with her spaghetti when Niall came down stairs.
I stopped feeding Michael and looked at Niall who had himself spaghetti.
" What?" He asked when he noticed that I was staring.
" Nothing" I answered and continued feeding Michael who was waiting.
" I'm tired" Amelia suddenly said and rubbed her eyes.
" Go upstairs and get yourself ready for sleep love" I said and wiped a yellow round that was in the corner of Michael's mouth.
" I can't brush my teeth by myself" Amelia cried. She was really tired.
I looked at Niall who hadn't touched his spaghetti.
" Maybe dad can help you?" I asked and looked at Niall who was staring infront of him.
I just wanted him to think about something else for a minuet. He needed to be around his family.
" Niall, love?" I said kindly.
Niall looked up. " What?" He asked. He got black bags under his eyes like he hadn't been asleep for weeks.
" Can you help your daughter to brush her teeth?" I asked. I felt so bad asking him, but maybe he needed to be around his family.
" Yes" He said like he was an robot.
Amelia thanked for dinner and ran upstairs to get ready for sleep.
Michael was finished with his food so I took him out of his chair and wiped his mouth gently. He was ready for sleep now.
" Dad ! " I heard Amelia yell from her bathroom upstairs.
It was like Niall was shut down. He didn't answer. He just kept staring infront of him.
" DAD" She yelled louder, causing Michael to start crying.
" Niall ? Amelia is calling you" I said and tried to calm Michael down.
Niall looked up. " What?"
" Amelia, she's waiting for you upstairs" I said confused.
" Right" He said and stood up. He left the kitchen and it was for the first time were I looked at Niall's dish and it wasn't empty.
He didn't touch his food.
After Michael was calmed down I got upstairs to put him into his crib.
It didn't seem like he was gonna go to sleep so I started singing for him.
When his eyes were almost shut down and I was in the middle of a song I heard Amelia.
" What is going on?" I asked myself.
I stood up quietly so I wouldn't wake Michael up.
When I was out of his bedroom I started hearing Amelia more.
" Dad what are you doing? Answer me" I heard her say.
" Dad this isn't funny, I'm scared"
I walked into Amelia's bedroom were I saw her and Niall in her bathroom.
Niall was sitting on the end of the bathtub, holding her tooth brush in his hand , but just staring infront of him.
Amelia put her hands infront of her eyes and was about to start crying when I woke up from my thoughts and walked to her.
" It's alright sweetheart, he's just a little tired after the day, that's all...let me brush your teeth" I said and smiled.
Niall didn't move when I took the tooth brush out of his hand. He didn't even blink. Was he having a nervous breakdown? Should I take him to the doctor?
" Here you go" I said and tried to stay calm for Amelia after brushing her teeth. " Straight up to bed"
Amelia nodded her head and ran onto her bed.
I kissed her on the forhead.
I walked to the bathroom and took Niall's hand.
" Come one Niall" I said and made him stand up.
" Love you" I said and smiled to Amelia when we passed her bed.
I closed the door behind me and walked with Niall into our bedroom.
I made him sit down on the bed.
" Niall?" I asked and waved my hand infront of his eyes.
I tried everything to make him talk to me. He didn't answer me.
It wasn't until I had been silence for few minuets when Niall finally looked at me.
" He's gone isn't he?"
I nodded my head slowly.
Niall nodded his head back and started crawling up to bed.
I layed down next to him and wrapped my hands around him.
" I don't know how to be" Niall admitted after we had been lying next to each other for a while.
" How do you feel?" I asked and stroke his hair away from his face.
" Angry, confused, hurt" He said and looked at me.
" If you wanna be angry go out and brake something, if you are confused get answers and if you are hurt....let it out" I said and smiled weakly.
And there it was. Niall's first tear.
I dragged Niall closer to me and let his head rest on my chest.
" Just let it out" I whispered as I stroke through his hair.
Niall's body was shivering and I found his tears through my shirt.
I can't imagine what Niall was going through.
I would probably lose it if one of my hero's would leave me like that...
Without getting the chance to say goodbye.