hey guys sorry I took so long to release this chapter but it is unfortunately the last official chapter of the story and I wanted to make sure I was happy before I published it. if you have any questions for the author (me, hi.) about the way this book ended or any future stories of mine just comment your question or message me and I will try my very best tot answer them :) thank you all for reading my very first story on wattpad and I ho pyou enjoyed the book and the last chapter - ella
Max and I sit in his car, the heavy silence, filled with words unsaid, sitting between us. Neither of us know where to begin, this feels more like an end.
"are you okay?"
"how have you been?"
We speak simultaneously, inducing a bout of nervous laughter form the both of us and the silence returns. There's a certain sort of sadness in not knowing what to say to your best friend.
"when did it get like this?" he asks, half to me, half to himself. " when did I stop knowing how to be around you? You're m best friend, Elodie, being around you sometimes feels like the only thing I'm good at and now I cant even do that?" he's looking at me with a mad sort of desperation in his eyes, searching for an answer in my eyes. I break eye contact, I'd almost forgotten the exact colour of his eyes, and look down at my hands.
"I'm sorry." I say and I see his head snap to me in the corner of my eye. "if I hadn't ... If I hadn't kissed you then everything would still be okay."
I look up at him to gage his reaction and see him shaking his head.
"don't apologise. I don't regret that kiss." he admits almost sheepishly. " If you hadn't kissed me that night we would be exactly where we were before and as confusing and difficult as working this out is, I'd rather be here than there."
I feel my cheeks redden but despite the topic of conversation, I feel more at ease with him now than I did before.
" So how did you feel about it? the kiss." I ask, almost playfully.
He pretends to mull it over before replying with a shrug.
"eh... 7.5."
I gape at him in faux horror.
"7.5?!" I ask incredulously. " that was not a 7.5 kiss, 8.3 maybe."
"please." he scoffs. "9.7."
" You can remember the exact rating?" my voice is laced with disbelief.
" I can't seem to forget anything about it."
I realise how close we had become during our conversation. I see his eyes flicker down to my lips and then back up and fight the urge to do the same. I hesitantly move back, away from him. I'm not sure if I regret it yet but I know that if and when I next kiss Max I want to know exactly what one another is thinking and feeling. No confusion, no secrets, no games, just us.
I lean back in the car seat and inhale the familiar smell. this car has always smelt of history. he bought it second hand so it came with it's own past and its own stories but we still made our own. This car smells like the night Max and I stared up at the stars, it smells like every drive we ever made together to school, like the road trips up to his dad's house. As strange as it sounds, I feel like this car is one of us. Granted it's probably older than us and it hasn't been with us for nearly as long but it still feels like a part of something. I missed this car. I missed max too.
"Before we do anything, I want to know what you're feeling." I say turning in my seat towards him.
Max takes this in and nods.
"that's fair." I wait for him to continue. " I guess I'm confused. I mean, I didn't really know how I felt about you before you kissed me. I mean, don't get me wrong, I've thought about it. you're a awesome girl I've known forever, of course I've thought about it. Now it's like I can't sop thinking about it. I feel like a traitor."
"How are you a traitor?"
He gives a sheepish shrug.
"you're my best friend, Elodie, I never thought it would be like this."
"I kissed you." I say, almost embarrassed.
" yeah, but I probably shouldn't have liked it so much." he mumbles shyly and a warm blush spreads across my cheeks. I'm not completely what s=to say in this moment so I just settle for:
"do you like me?"
"yes." he replies without hesitation. "do you like me?"
"yes." once I've said it almost can't believe it . "quite a lot actually."
he smiles at me and everything seems a little bit more okay.
"What now?" I ask.
" well, I was thinking a date? There could be flowers and music or just us. I don't really mind?" I swallow the lump in my throat and try to regain control of my heartbeat.
"What then?" It his turn to blush.
"You could be my girlfriend? Or whatever you want to be."
"What happens if we break up?" I ask. "I don't want to lose your friendship."
"Elodie..." He says softly. "What is there to lose? We barely talk, Levi's gone and you barely looked at me before tonight. What do we have to lose?"
"Everything." He sighs.
"That possibility is always going to be there." He says leaning back in his seat. "But you could also lose everything by turning around. You don't have to say yes. I just can't stand the thought of not having you in my life and I don't know if I know how to be 'just friends' anymore." The silence Huns around us as I mull this over. I lean forward and put my hands on either side of his face. His eyes flicker shut and I whisper;
"May I kiss you?"
"Yes."
Our lips meet somewhere in the middle and everything seems to stand still. I place my hand on the back of his neck and deepen the kiss as he coils an arm around my waist. This kiss isn't like the first one. It's not messy or confusing it just us, in his car and put lips move together like that is what they were made to do and I know that this is what it was meant to be like. This what i wanted and it was all so worth it. All I know and all I can think is here, in this moment, I don't feel lost at all.
Hello everyone! I'm not sure how I feel about this but you guys deserve something. This is the last chapter but o plan on going back and editing the whole thing and this chapter could undergo some extreme changed but I will keep you guys posted. if you guys have any questions concerning the ending or anything else feel free to comment and ask and I will answer any and all. I hope you enjoyed reading my story :)