~ These dreams go on when I close my eyes... ~
Chapter Thirty-One: Restful Dreams
"I liked that time in the backyard."
"Which one?"
"Oh all of them, but the first time in our backyard, when I got back from class that one time?"
"Oh yeah. I liked that time too, but the thing about when we do it in the grass is my entire body itches the rest of the night."
Max grinned. "A small price to pay," he added to my statement. I laughed, looking up into his beautiful eyes. Max and I had been up for about an hour now, just laying in bed and talking quietly, waiting for the alarm to go off at four. I laid on my back with my hand behind my head, with Max laying on his side beside me, his head propped up on his elbow.
"I kinda liked that time on my birthday, after going out to dinner, on the couch in the lounge," I admitted, reaching up and running my fingers along his cheek. Max smirked, reaching up and touching my fingers where they rested over his soft skin. For some reason, I had no idea how we'd gotten here, Max and I had fallen into the topic of our favorite times we'd made love. It wasn't awkward honestly, actually a pretty comfortable topic, strangely.
"To be honest," he murmured, taking my fingers and bringing them gently to his soft lips. "One of my favorites was the time we made love in the shower that morning we woke up Karp."
I raised my eyebrows. "We?"
Max chuckled. "Okay, fine," he whispered. "When I woke up Karp."
I smiled. "I liked that one too," I told him. "It was pretty fun," I admitted.
Max suddenly smiled sweetly, pushing my hair from my face. "The night we spent on the beach?" he said. "The time in the back of the rental truck?"
I laughed lightly, tilting my head back slightly. "You know, it was so much more romantic and sensual than it sounds."
Max chuckled. "I know," he said. "I hadn't actually planned for us to make love that night, but when we were laying there, talking about baby names and cuddling, I kinda just lost myself in the need of it all."
I smiled, nodding as I pulled him down to peck his lips. "I know the feeling," I assured him, slowly releasing him. Max ran his hand along my hair again, before his soft eyes met mine after a brief pause of silence.
"But..." he said, whispering as a look of wonder came across his face. "By far one of my favorite love makings with you was our first."
I grinned. "In my clearing, in the grass underneath all the twinkly lights you'd set up for my prom."
Max nodded, smiling as a soft distance fell over his eyes. "The night you chased away the nightmares I'd had about our encounter in the rain."
"The night you went out on a limb to try and salvage my relationship with my mother," I said.
"The night I subconsciously knew that you were the one I'd be with for our very own perfect forever and always," Max told me.
"The night you managed to tear down one of the final walls I'd built," I breathed.
"The night you really opened your heart and fully let me into your private world, the world where I fell further and further in love with a certain stunningly beautiful blue-eyed dancer," Max told me.
"The night of my first..." I whispered.
"The night of my final first..." Max murmured. "The only first that will ever matter in my heart."
"A perfect sensation..." I said.
"That blossomed into so much more," my love finished.
"The night we went all the way..." I giggled.
"The night that connected us in body and spirit," Max murmured.
I sighed in content, realizing Max had slowly been moving closer, now hovering over me with his arm on my opposite side to keep himself balanced. He gave me a small, loving smile, his eyes still slightly lost in the swirl of memories and feelings. "It was so soft, and slow..."
I closed my eyes. "Tender..." I added. Max nodded, his face still inching closer.
"Tender," he repeated, his lips grazing my skin as he spoke. "Beautiful..."
I sucked in a surprised breath as he kissed me, bringing my numb body closer. He lifted me by my shoulders, guiding my arms up around his neck. His hand slid down my back and rested against my hip, squeezing gently as he softly deepened our kiss, resting himself closer without applying pressure to my body. The covers kept us warm as he just laid in our bed, kissing gently and reminding ourselves why we were given the hand we were dealt; because at the end of the game, we both knew we'd been given the cards of a lifetime.
We slowly pulled away, out of breath, listening to each other try to regain control. Max smiled as we listened to the alarm suddenly go off, making Karp mumble indignantly in his sleep, roll over, slapping the snooze button, and then rolling back over. Max leaned down to whisper in my ear, his voice giving me rippling chills.
"Christmas night..." he murmured, nibbling gently on the top of my ear. "In my room, with your brother below us and one of our best friends across the lounge."
I smiled, recalling the love making easily and pecking his lips in return.
* * * * *
I laughed as Max encircled me in his arms, pressing me close and holding my face in his chest. "You're sweaty!" I told him, feeling his heart still pounding with the adrenaline of the show he'd just done. My love grinned, slowly shimmying me out of his plaid shirt I wore on my body over a gray tank top.
"Can I take this?" he asked. "I still have a meet and greet, and as you mentioned, I'm kinda sweaty."
I nodded, watching him slide out of the wet tank top he had on for the show. The girls who were around screamed as he stood there with his shirt off, as I began laughing at how I thought they'd react if they knew that's how he slept beside me every night, bare-chested. He smirked slightly as he tugged the plaid shirt around himself, hurriedly trying to button it up, and in his haste doing the buttons wrong.
I laughed, grabbing him by his collar before he could run off. "Your buttons are all wrong," I whispered, pulling him back in front of me and beginning to fix them. Max smiled softly as he watched me, protectively holding my waist as I redid the last button. "You know," I whispered. "You'd think at twenty-one years old you could button your own shirt properly," I mused, my voice quiet. He laughed as he leaned forward and kissed my cheek, eliciting a loud and collective 'aww' from the girls in the crowd. I suppressed a snort, pecking his lips in return.
"Love you," he told me, slowly letting me go. He faced me long enough to hear me tell him that I loved him too, and to flash me a genuinely loving smile, before he turned and walked over to where the meet and greet was going on. I sighed as I hoisted myself up onto the table behind me, pulling my booted leg up to lay straight on the table beside me. I began playing with my hair as I grabbed my novel of the week, flipping to my place and beginning to chew my bottom lip as I read.
I shivered slightly as a gust of wind blew my curls around, making goosebumps form on my now bare shoulders. I sighed a small sigh as I leaned to my left, stretching until my fingers grasped Max's black hoodie I'd brought just in case, quickly slipping it over my body and nuzzling into its comforting warmth. I returned happily to my book, enveloping myself in the thrilling plot of my newest addiction.
"Hey," I jumped as I was suddenly jerked out of my own head and into reality, looking up at Karp as he smiled softly at me. I returned it, dog-earring my page and leaning back forward.
"Hey," I responded. "What's up?"
DKarp nodded towards Max, watching as the curly haired boy turned towards us and winked at me, his smile soft as he turned back to a couple of his fans. "He wanted someone to come check on you," Karp mused. "He said he was wondering if any of his fans had approached you yet."
I snorted. "No," I told him. "But they've been staring at watching me like hawks. It's kind of intimidating, honestly," I confided. My friend laughed, leaning against the table.
"Max also wanted me to ask how your pain is," he asked next, his tone a little more somber. I frowned, scratching the back of my neck as I sighed.
"It's bad," I admitted. "But I'd rather you not tell him that."
Karp nodded. "I figured," he told me. "I'll keep quiet," he promised. "But can you handle it? The pain, I mean."
I frowned, wincing as we spoke, though not from the pain. I was beginning to literally crave for Max's skin on mine, his lips pressed against my own, and it was so much more painful than my injuries. I cringed, looking over at my love and sighing longingly.
"I'll be fine," I told Karp. "I just hope this meet and greet doesn't last very long," I confessed. "It's hard being apart from him right now."
DKarp just chuckled, gently patting my shoulder. "He feels the same way," he assured me, grinning. "I'll see you soon."
I nodded. "See you," I told him, smiling and waving as he made his way back to the band. I sighed again, reopening my book and trying to bury myself into the story again, rather than my desire for Max's touch. I let his scent from his hoodie fill my mind, making the nearly impossible feat a little harder to swallow. I sighed, yet again, squirming slightly, waiting for Max to get done.
"Waiting on me?" a soft, low voice whispered in my ear, strong arms slipping around my waist. He startled me, causing me to jump again, though this time in his embrace.
"As a matter of fact, I am," I returned, listening to Max's quiet breathing behind me. "Though I could've done without the scaring, baby."
Max chuckled, squeezing my waist gently. "Sorry, love," he murmured, resting his chin on my shoulder. A warm, beautiful sensation flooded my body at his touch, his gentle fingers caressing my arms as his hands ran up and down my skin. "It's just too tempting not to sneak up on you."
I smiled. "Well," I told him. "Scaring me aside, what're you doing?" I asked. "There are still plenty of girls over there to be met and gret."
Max snorted. "I hate to bring it up, but gret isn't a word, beautiful."
I laughed. "I know," I assured him. "But 'meeted and greeted' just sounded weird in my head."
Max smiled, amused by my response. "Karp happened to mention to me you were in need of a few loving gestures from a certain man who stole your shirt," he told me, his tone adoring. I stifled a laugh at the way he'd put it, his words meaningful in the way he spoke to me.
"Tell that man that he can keep my shirt, since technically it was his to begin with," I mentioned off-handedly. "And while you're at it, tell him thank you for coming to hold me for a minute."
Max kissed my cheek. "I don't think he requires thanks for coming to put both his and his gorgeous fiancé's minds to rest," he admitted. "I'm confident he missed you as much as you missed him... Maybe even more."
I let out a breath of laughter. "Okay, can we stop referring to you in the third person?" I requested. "It's kinda confusing."
Max grinned. "Anything for you, darling."
I stopped playing with his fingers where they'd fallen on my stomach, looking back at him. "That's new," I stated. "Since when do you call me darling?"
Max met my gaze lovingly, holding me closer. "Since I've been looking to expand my list of things to call you," he responded. "I like darling, a lot, and its something that's been on my mind since... Well, since the accident."
I couldn't help the warm fuzzy feeling I got when the word left his lips in reference to me, and I couldn't deny I adored the new name. "I love it, Max," I whispered honestly, watching him. He smiled tentatively, as if he hadn't really been sure.
"Really?" he asked, almost nervously. I nodded, causing him to smile, leaning in and pecking my cheek. "Great," he said, happy enthusiasm in his voice. "I was really afraid you wouldn't like it."
I giggled, nodding. Max suddenly looked up at me, more serious now. "Despite what you told Karp to tell me, I know you're hurting," he murmured. "You haven't taken any meds in almost twenty-four hours. Do you want me to get you something?"
I slowly shook my head. "I'll be alright," I promised. "Just have fun. Don't worry about me so much."
Max smiled. "You know that's next to impossible for me, right?" he asked, his hand still firm on my waist. I shrugged, tucking my bangs behind my ears and nodding.
"Just try," I told him. "And go; I'm sure the fans are getting antsy, and I wanna get back on the bus."
Max nodded reluctantly, pressing his lips against mine for a moment, before squeezing my waist. "I love you," he told me gently, though he didn't move like he was leaving.
"I love you too," I assured him. "Now go," I laughed. "Woo those girls," I told him teasingly. Max just laughed, grabbing and squeezing my hand.
"Please," he murmured. "You know you're the only girl I'm interested in wooing," he told me, before gently pecking my forehead and disappearing. I chuckled, feeling better now that my love had come to see me. My chest hurt a little less, and I didn't yearn quite so badly for his touch. I allowed myself to relax, plugging in my earbuds and putting on my practice music, the familiar melodies striking and feeling like home. I hummed softly along for the next hour, finding myself in the world surrounded by the latest fantasy series I'd addicted myself to.
Just as James Patterson was about to let me experience Daniel X's home world, Alpar Nok, for the first time, I felt the weight of a rather heavy gaze. I tried to ignore it, figuring it was probably Max, though I couldn't shake the feeling it really wasn't. I slowly tore my eyes from the words on the clean white pages of my book, glancing up at my love. It wasn't him who was looking at me, his attention on signing a few t-shirts and taking a couple of pictures with two young girls. I furrowed my eyebrows, noticing it wasn't any of the guys either, watching as they took pictures too. I lifted my eyes as I looked around, searching for whoever was staring so hard at me.
My gaze finally feel on a girl about my age, maybe a year older, staring intensely at me. She had long, flowing, dirty blonde hair that fell around her face in perfect waves, and her forest-green eyes could cut you with like a knife. Her eyes weren't her only sharp features, in fact, all of her features were sharp, from her chin to her cheek bones, her jaw that ran the had line of her face. She stared at me intensely, and the more eye contact they made, the more I felt she was familiar, and it took me a minute to realize who she was.
"So tell me," I jumped, startled by my love's voice as he jumped up on the table behind me. "How does such a beautiful girl end up being the fiancé of a wandering musician?"
I rolled my eyes, tearing my stare from the girl. "You're not exactly a wondering musician, baby."
Max grinned, pecking my cheek. "It sounded more romantic that way."
I snorted. "Well if you must know, I fell in love with him," I told him. "Nothing crazy, no need for adrenaline, no weird motives; I just fell in love with him. With his pure, loving soul."
Max chuckled, leaning over and pressing a soft kiss to my cheek. The boys all crowded around me and Max, falling into conversation as my eyes lifted to where the girl was moments ago. Her figure had disappeared, causing me to frown as I tried to recall where I'd seen her.
"'Pure loving soul'?" Nick said, watching me with a smirk on his face. "Are you sure you're talking about Max, Blakely?"
Max shot his friend a glare as I laughed, resting my hand on Max's knee as I slowly lowered my booted leg off the table to make more room for the guys. Max jumped down to help, easing me to my feet gently and letting me lean on him for support.
"Are you about done?" I asked him, gritting my teeth as waves and waves of pain passed. Max nodded, shifting me so most of my weight was left to him, minimizing how bad my body hurt.
"Almost, love," he murmured, holding me close. "We'll hang around for about fifteen more minutes for any straggling fans, them we'll get to the bus and get you some meds."
I nodded, slowly beginning to ease away from him, before Max pulled me back. "Where do you think you're going?" he laughed, burying his face in my neck. I smiled.
"Trying not to leave you with all of my weight," I responded. "I know you're tired after your show."
Max shrugged, grinning softly at me. "I'm alright," he promised. "I like holding you, pretty girl. You should know that by now."
I nodded, slipping my hand into his. He kissed my temple sweetly, gently humming as my eyes began to search the area again. I was looking for that girl, trying to find her again to try and remember. Max noticed my wandering stare, watching me cutely. "You okay, darling?" he asked me. My heart fluttered at the new name, my stomach knotting as I looked back at him while an soft blush blossomed across my cool cheeks.
"Yeah..." I said slowly. "I'm alright."
Max smiled, hugging me lovingly. "You're so cute, you know that?" he laughed, his eyes sparkling as he gently poked my cheek. "Just the most adorable, precious thing ever."
I giggled, cuddling into his warm chest. "You also smell absolutely amazing," he told me. "Out of this world most intoxicating scent."
I closed my eyes, smiling as Max slowly shifted, picking me up bridal style and cradling me close. "Why don't you try and sleep, hmm?" he suggested. "Let me take care of you for a bit until we can get back on the bus."
I frowned, thinking, because the idea was tempting. "Wake me up if a fan wants to hug you or something," I told him. "I don't wanna be in the way of you and your fans."
Max nodded. "Close your eyes..." he murmured. "I'll wake you up to tell you goodnight when I lay you down on the bus."
I barely nodded, pressing my face into my love's neck and inhaling his scent. "You won't leave me, right?" I asked. Max smiled softly, rolling his eyes lovingly.
"Where else would I go, love?" he whispered, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "I've got everything I need right here, safely tucked away in my arms. I don't see any reason to be anywhere else..."
I smiled, gently allowing myself to be whisked away into deep sleep.
* * * * *
"We've never really seen you so happy," Durston's voice slowly cut through my thick fog of sleep. "I mean, you've always been a really all around happy guy, but never like this."
"It's true," Nick's voice came next. "In all the years I've known you, with the girls you've been serious with, none of them are anything like your relationship with Blakely."
It slowly occurred to me that Max was carrying me, the guys were walking somewhere. "She seriously is different," his voice made my ears perk up. "None of the other girls come close to being as perfect as she is. Have you noticed the way we mold against each other? It's like we're puzzle pieces."
I heard DKarp laugh. "Believe me, we've noticed," he told Max. "It's like you move as one person, rather than the two individuals. Like you share a brain..."
I couldn't help chuckling slightly in my sleepy state. "More like a soul," I mumbled, curling further into Max's warm arms. I sensed his smile, his body bringing me closer.
"Hey there sleepy head," he murmured as I felt him lay me down on something soft. I opened my eyes to realize it was the couch on the bus, watching as Max kneeled down by my side. He took my hand and held it, softly stroking his thumb along my knuckles as I gave a sleepy, half conscious smile.
"Hi," I whispered, slowly turning on my side, groaning as I did so. "How was the rest of the meet and greet?"
Max smiled. "It was fine," he told me gently. "A couple of fans came over just to tell me how cute it was that you were sleeping in my arms," he chuckled. "I'll have to admit, it was pretty adorable."
I laughed softly, before yawning cutely. Max caressed my cheek, slowly letting go of my hand as he pulled his shoes off. "Let's go to bed, huh?" he said. "We need the rest."
I slowly nodded, sitting up as I rubbed my eyes innocently. Max sighed in content as he watched all the boys come hug me goodnight, before they all went to their respective bunks and leaving Max to turn out the lights. When he was done and he ditched his jeans for shorts and helped me do the same, before he swept me off and slid me into his bunk, enfolding me into his arms shorty after. He'd slipped out of his shirt beforehand, leaving his chest warm and bare, allowing me to bury myself against his body and listen to his softly beating heart.
"Goodnight, beautiful," Max whispered, kissing my forehead as he pulled the blankets up around me. "Sweet dreams, precious girl."
I smiled, kissing his shoulder. "I love you, baby..." I murmured sleepily, losing myself against his gentle touch as it began pulling through my hair.
"I love you too, gorgeous."
* * * * *
Dreams were never so sweet as the one I had that night beside my love.
It was almost ghostly, the way it played out, though it was a beautiful kind of ghostly. It was the kind of ghostly that gave you chills and raised goosebumps on your arms, a quiet violin playing a soft, almost eerie melody in the background. The area was a glowing white, with a white alter and white, ruffled linens hanging behind it. Max stood beside it in a raven black blazer and a white t-shirt, his hand outstretched to take mine.
"You look stunning, darling," he told me quietly, his voice echoing in the seemingly endless room as I tentatively took his pale hand. I furrowed my eyebrows, looking down to see I was dressed in an elegant wedding gown. The skirt was poofy and traditional, with a gorgeous, beaded bodice that hugged my torso in the most beautiful way. A long vail was pinned in my hair, making me smile slightly as it furled around me.
"It's so quiet," I murmured thoughtfully, and it truly was, aside from the violin, I told myself, letting him pull me closer. I took hesitant steps, braced for the pain, but none came. I lifted my skirt and noticed my bare legs; no boot. I wasn't even wearing shoes. I smiled slightly as my love tugged me in front of him, taking my other hand as well. His touch sent shivers along my back, his skin almost ghost-like against mine.
"Quiet is open," Max told me, smiling gently. "Quiet leaves room for all the conversation in the world," he paused, before adding, "Or no conversation at all."
I looked up at Max, embodied in my dream. "What is this?" I asked, looking around. Max shrugged, pulling me closer.
"Shouldn't I ask you that question?" he laughed, the sound bouncing and echoing again. "This is after all your dream, love."
I was still, before nodding, looking around again. I suddenly stepped against him, guiding his arm to my waist as my hand fell on his shoulder. As if acting on instinct, Max raised and intertwined our fingers to the side, looking down at me lovingly. "Will you dance with me?" I asked. "I don't get to in the real world..."
Max grinned, nodding slightly. "Of course, Blakely."
It seemed we danced for hours. Although it was a dream me and not the real me, I was unrealistically grateful I was able to move my body freely again. Max guided me sweetly, leading me into soft turns and gentle dips, where his ghost-like features held me close. He loved me in my dreams as much as he did in reality, and to me, that was beautiful.
"I wish I didn't have to go," I told Max, shifting and wrapping my arms around his neck. My love chuckled, holding me closer.
"I know, beautiful," he murmured. "You'll be okay. When you wake up, the real Max will be there to murmur softly in your ear, to tell you good morning like he does every day and to tell you he loves you more than anything in the whole world."
I sighed. "I have to wake up now, don't I?"
Max nodded. "Yes, pretty girl," he told me. "But don't worry, okay?" his voice assured me, slowly lifting my chin. "I'm sure you'll see me again soon."
I smiled, slowly nodding. "Promise?"
Max nodded again. "I promise, darling."
I couldn't help but grin as he leaned down and pressed his lips to my forehead, his lips like a shadow to my skin. He squeezed my shoulders, before reaching for my hands and making me release him. "Don't worry so much about your pain, okay?" he suddenly whispered, tucking my bangs back behind my ears. I slowly nodded, looking up at him. He smiled, pecking my forehead again, before letting go and backing away.
The further he backed away, the fuzzier my vision got, and the more I drifted again into darkness.
_____________________________________
A lot of this is just drabble in preparation for the next couple of chapters.
I'm getting a little frightened, guys. Is the story getting boring?
I really need to know. I haven't gotten much feedback lately.
So comment, vote, do that sort of thing. Tell me if something's off or something's wrong in the story or writing.
Thanks loves.
You're all flawless. Remember that ;-)
Goodnight, beautifuls
-Casey