Richard Jr. & Rima in the Photo above.
"Now, where should we start?" Dr. Jackson looked back and forth between us.
Rich and I agreed that before we got married, we would go to counseling a few months before. Due to recent events however, we ended up here earlier than expected. For Rich to discuss his feelings about me to someone else other than me, that was already a slap in the face. But accusing me of messing around with Jay was enough to make me want to leave. I would never cheat on Rich, ever. Especially not with his best friend; I'm not that girl. I don't even talk to Jay unless Rich is around, and I'm not a fan of him right now anyway.
Realizing that neither one of us would talk first, she took matters into her own hands. Standing up, she went over to her bookshelf and picked up two composition notebooks.
"How about we begin with an icebreaker activity ? I want you to take a few minutes and write down what you love about your relationship now, and three areas in your relationship that could be improved." She instructed us, giving us both a notebook and pen.
She set a timer and told us to begin. It didn't take long for me to write down my thoughts. I think about our relationship 24/7; he's always on my mind good or bad. I can't imagine losing Rich now after everything we've been through. That would literally crush me.
I sat patiently waiting until the timer went off.
"How about ladies first? Quanni, let's hear what you wrote. What do you love about your relationship with Rich now?" She asked, prepared to listen attentively.
"Well... I-"
"It's okay to speak directly to Richard. I'm just here to coach you, but it's important to let each other know directly how you feel. So, face Rich and tell him what's on your mind. She smiled and waited again for me to start.
I took a deep breath and slowly turned to face Rich. He was looking at me expectantly, waiting for me to speak.
"I love waking up everyday knowing that I'm with someone who truly loves me for me. You've seen me at my best and some of my worst, yet you still love me the same. I love the way you protect me no matter what; you always have. Since the very first moment we spent together, I've always felt safe around you. Like you could conquer the world if you want to. Don't get me wrong, you ain't God." I say causing him to grin and chuckle a little.
"But God definitely made you my Super Man." I spoke those word softly while shaking my head at the same time in agreement to myself.
Rich never said anything, he just looked deep into my eyes. That look that makes squirm in his presence; I felt like he was looking into my soul.
"Well said." She smiled before tapping away at her laptop.
"Now what are areas that you'd like to improve?"
I took a breath again and looked down at the words written on the paper. Whether he was ready to hear this or not it was about to be said.
"We need to work on communication, time, and honesty." I say never looking his way.
He scoffed and mumbled something under his breath. Instantly my blood began to boil. I don't know why he's treating me like this, and the only reason I've acted salty towards him is because he won't tell me what's really on his mind.
"Is there something you want to say Richard?" She gave him a look.
"For you to want all that, you sure have done the opposite." I looked up to see him clenching his jaw staring straight at the wall.
"You shut me down every chance you get. I try to talk, you don't respond. I try to spend time with you, you make yourself busy. I ask you what's wrong, you never tell me. I can't get nothing from you." He raised his voice with each thing he said.
"Because you haven't been honest with me Rich; you lied to me. You looked me in my eyes and lied." I screamed to the top of my lungs.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" He held his hands up.
"I heard your phone conversation with Jay the day I was being released from the hospital..."
***
Rich POV
"You blame me for what happened to the twins! You told him if I hadn't been so stubborn then me having them early could have been avoided. You blame me." She yelled over and over again.
Damn.
I didn't even realize she heard me that day on the phone. It wasn't even like that. I don't necessarily blame Quanni but I do think she should have just listened to me; I would never tell her that though.
"No Steph, it's not even like that." I said calmly trying to get her to calm down.
"Really bruh? You're just gonna continue to lie to me? I heard you Richard, there's no coming back from that!" She scoffed and sat back on the couch.
Is it bad that I find her so attractive right now?
"Okay, I did say that Steph. But that wasn't what the phone conversation was about." I pleaded with her.
"What else could it have possibly been about?" She narrowed her eyes at me.
I didn't say anything. I couldn't tell her that I was actually on the phone planning a whole new baby shower for Quanni. She deserves one with no drama at all. I couldn't tell her that I was purchasing her Range Rover and I was gonna surprise her with it at the shower. I definitely wasn't telling her that I was gonna propose to her again. So I just kept quiet.
"Exactly." She shook her head at me.
"It's not what you're thinking Quanni." I mumbled softly.
"You know what I don't even care what the conversation was about. You still said it. The fact that you even implied that the twins' health complications were because of me was a complete slap in the face. I never had any complications with my pregnancy until I found out about your lies." She pointed at me intently.
"I wasn't threatening to miscarry until I found out about your past life. Stress... Is the reason that I suffered during this pregnancy. But I hid it from you because I would never allow myself to see you carry the burden of think that your were the cause of something terrible happening to your children. I love you too much to do that." By that time her voice was cracking.
"But I didn't get that from you... Not once. You told me one thing and told Jay another. I carried those babies! I did! I sat up in pain countless days hoping and praying to God that my babies and I would make it. I went to countless doctor's appointment that nobody knew about, having tests ran to make sure that they were okay. I told Dr. Asiago that if anything were to go wrong that I wanted my babies to be saved. Don't worry about me. I did that." When the words left her mouth, my heart skipped a beat.
"I would never... Ever put my babies in danger. Certainly not intentionally Rich. Not Rich Jr, not Rima, and not even Skye. I would put my life on the line for them. I did put my life on the line for them. I couldn't avoid having them early Rich, my body just wasn't strong enough." She cried.
She was completely breaking down right before my eyes.
"If that's what makes it my fault then I'm sorry. I'm sorry Rich! I sorry I couldn't protect my babies enough." She forced the words in between cries.
By this time she was balled up on the couch in a fetal position. Her entire body was shaking and she was crying literally at the top of her lungs. She was breaking my heart. I got up from my seat to go and comfort her. When I tried to pull her into me she scooted away. I tried reaching for her again but this time she got up from the couch and left the room.
We waited for about fifteen minutes before I realized that she wasn't coming back.
"I didn't see that coming." Mumbling I put my head in my hands on the couch.
"You sure about that?" Dr. Jackson raised an eyebrow and signaled for me to elaborate.
"Yes... No... I don't know. I was thinking that she has postpartum or something. I never would've thought she heard what I said. I didn't even mean it like that." I shook my head as my mind went back to the day Quanni was released from the hospital.
"What exactly did you mean when those words left your mouth? " Dr. Jackson folded her arms.
It was pretty evident whose side she was on.
"I was talking to my best friend Jay about a surprise that I'm planning for her. I'm gonna throw her another baby shower since I kind of ruined the first one." Her face had questions written all over it so I went ahead and explained everything to her. From Quanni's aunt, to, Arayia, all the way down to my confrontation with Mickey.
"Wow." She shook her head in disbelief as she took in everything that I'd just told her.
"Yea I F'd up." I scoffed.
"Well it's certainly clear that you two have a tremendous amount of work ahead of you. But it's also very evident that you love each other deeply. This session may appear to have gone left, but actually you made much progress." I looked at her kind of sideways.
"You two agree that you want the same things. You want time, to communicate better, and you certainly want honesty. You were finally able to hear why Quanni has been so distant. She was honest with you; now Richard, you must do the same. You have to be honest with her."
***
Dr. Jackson was right. We actually did make progress in today's session. I mean, things did get a little heated and Quanni walked out but it was ultimately worth it. I finally understand what her frustration has been. She has this thing about her where she'll consider everyone else's feelings and emotions before her own, so she hold stuff in for so long until she just breaks down. That's exactly what she did and I understand completely.
Now that I know what's on her mind I can approach the situation differently. We're gonna get through this tonight. I pulled into driveway right behind Quanni's car and sat for a moment to prepare myself. Tonight was one of those nights that I'm glad I agreed to let Skye spend the weekend at Rhea's for her and Mona's play date; I'd just call her and ask if she could just bring them back over and watch the twins for me. Thank God she decided to move to Dallas.
"What's up bro? How'd the session go?" She picked up immediately and asked.
"Well..." I scratched my head and rested on the steering wheel, replaying the session over and over again in my head.
"We'll be there in thirty." She said.
"Thanks Rhea, I owe you." Smiling I opened the door to my BMW and made my way up to the door.
"Yea you're right. My wedding anniversary is coming up and I've never been to Mexico." I knew she was smirking on the other end of the phone.
"It's done." I say hanging up the phone just before she could protest.
As much of a friend she's been to me all these years, she deserves it and more. I'll book their flight and hold the room first thing in the morning. My phone buzzed in my pocket signaling that I had gotten a text.
Rhea
Dude I was only kidding.
Ignoring her, I slid my phone back into my pocket and enter the house in search for Quanni. She wasn't in any of the rooms downstairs, so after checking the voicemail I jogged up the stairs. There were two voicemails from Quanni's Aunt Missy. They still haven't talked since the baby shower. She gets emotional whenever she tries to explain what happened so I try not to bring it up; whatever she did shut Quanni down completely though. She won't allow her to see the twins, so it must've been pretty bad. All I know is, whatever hurts Quanni, I'm willing to fix it; even if it's me.
I found her in our bedroom standing over the twins' crib; the closer I walked toward her the more I could make out what she was saying.
"Mommy loves you, Richard and Rima. There is nothing in this world that I wouldn't do to protect you. I went through so much to get you here, and sometimes I didn't know if I ever would. You arrived earlier than any of us expected, but thank God you're here. My miracle babies; if I could give you the world I would , but for now whatever you ask will do. Remember that okay?" She wiped a tear and played with their little fingers.
They were both smiling up at her as if they understood what she was saying. I eased my phone out quietly and snapped a picture of their moment, posting the picture to Instagram and Facebook with my favorite quote as the caption:
'Mother: the most beautiful word on the lips of mankind...💕'
I tagged her in the photo and watched as she whipped out her phone to see the notification. She lightly smiled at the photo and turned her body around to face me. Slowly making my way to her, I pushed her naturally curly hair away from her face. Softly lifting her chin up to look into her eyes I smile. She returned the smile but I could see the hurt in her eyes.
Grabbing her hands I led her to our bed, sat down, and placed her on my lap to face me.
"I'm so sorry Stephanie, I really do apologize. I was wrong for not being honest with you, and certainly wrong for blaming you for the twins' health issues." I squeezed her hands while I talked to her.
"Rich, why wouldn't you tell me the truth? That's all I ever want from you, even if it does hurt. It's better than finding out in the long run and ending up like this." She scoffed and hung her head.
"Like what?" I lifted her chin again to see her eyes.
"Disconnected." She bit her bottom lip and stared into my eyes.
Taking a deep breath I pulled her into a hug before speaking.
"When I said that to Jay, I was venting... speaking out of frustration. I hadn't spent a full day with you or the twins in a whole week. I was working, taking care of Skye by myself which is something I haven't done in months. I was a little salty because even when I did try to take more time to be with y'all, you kept telling me everything was okay. Before you had Deuce and Bunni you were doing the same thing; walking around with this smile on your face like you weren't afraid. You were strong Sweets but I knew better. I just wanted to protect you, and I felt like you wouldn't let me. I know that even if I had, that still nothing would've changed. Of course none of that is an excuse for hurting your feelings." I smile faintly.
"I wasn't stupid. I knew the babies' health status had changed after everything that happened with Trice. I couldn't bare to think that my babies were having health problems because of me, so I thought if I did all I could to make you comfortable and keep your health in good condition then it would all be fine. So every time you protested it was like you took the opportunity from me to fix the problem, and that frustrated the hell out of me; then I took that same frustration and averted it to you."
"I know you would never put them in harm's way. After hearing you say that you were willing to give up your own life for them if anything happened, it made me realize how much of an ass I was for saying that. A dumb ass for accusing you of having something going on with Jay. I was selfish and I was wrong Stephanie. I love you... But I just can't stop hurting you. You don't deserve that, I'm sorry." I looked deeply into her eyes as I spoke softly to her.
She cupped my chin and planted a soft kiss on my lips.
"Rich, there was far more done to me in the past that hurt me. You don't even come close that. It just sucks to know that you're afraid to be honest with me. Am I that bad?" She scrunched up her eyebrows and cocked her head to the side.
"Well. You have tried to fight me a time or two," I said jogging her memory.
"And I don't wanna have to give you this pressure." Pulling her closer to my manhood I smirked and she blushed.
"Anyway Rich, I understand where you were coming from and I forgive you. But I also apologize for pushing you away. So.. Many... Times. When all you were trying to do was love me and make it right. This past month has been the hardest, feeling so distant because we both kept our feelings to ourselves. I don't want us to ever have to do this again babe." She poked her lips out.
Kissing her softly and lying back on the bed with her on my chest, I stroke her chin.
"It's all good sweets, we never will." I sigh looking up at the ceiling.
She wasn't lying, this has been one hell of a month. But I can't imagine anyone else in the world that I would rather have gone through all of this with.
***
After Rhea came over to stay with the twins, I had Quanni get dressed. A moment for us to enjoy each other's company is long overdue. Since she somewhat knew about the phone call with Jay I decided I would present her gift early, tonight after dinner. I'd have Jay bring the truck over while we ate and drive mine back home. We had just come from the movies to see 'Straight Outta Compton'
"I think that's the best movie I've seen all year." I said taking a sip of my Mojito.
"Right, my baby daddy did his thing." She smiled and tried to put her head on my shoulders.
She laughed when she realized I was moving away from her.
"Did he fracture his hand trying to get you to push? Hell no." I turned my lip up at her and scooted to the other side of the booth.
She tried to keep her composure and laugh quietly. She turned red in the face laughing at me. I knew she was playing but she better recognize.
"Babe, get out your feelings. Ice Cube could never take your place; him or his son. I'm all yours." She slid over and kissed my chin.
"That's what I like to hear." Just as I said that our food arrived.
We made small talk but mostly ate in silence. Would y'all believe her spoiled behind made me feed her? My baby.
"So, you ready to take my last name?" Her eyes met mine shortly after I asked the question.
"Yes... Just as soon as I lose twenty pounds." She looked at me seriously.
"But you didn't even gain twenty pounds from the pregnancy. Besides twenty pounds has nothing to do with you being Mrs. Reynolds. I looked at her confused.
"It does if I wanna get into the perfect dress. But don't worry, give me two months." She smiled optimistically.
"Well while you work on that I'll just keep this." I say reaching for her left hand.
She snatched away and looked me upside my head like I was crazy. She has no clue what I'm trying to do.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" She used her right hand to protect the other.
"Sweets, just give it here you'll see." I took her hand and slid the ring off her finger.
My poor baby was looking so sick in the face
"What did I do?" She asked damn near in years.
"Nothing sweets." I laughed.
"Then give me ring my back." She whined trying to reach for it.
She failed with each attempt to retrieve it from me. Finally with a pout on her face, she gave up.
"Fine." She mumbled hopelessly.
"Here's your ticket sir." The waitress said approving the table.
"You can just give it to her." I pointed. Causing then both to snap their necks and look at me crazy.
She did as I asked and handed the receipt to Quanni. She smacked her lips and went into her purse for her card. Shorty after the waitress came back with her card and another receipt.
"Asshole." She mumbled under her breath.
Suddenly the frown was replaced my tears. She was so busy trying to be mad at me that she hadn't realized I was down on one knee in front of her with a completely different ring.
"Rich, what are you doing?" She asked barely whispering.
"Take a look at the receipt again sweets." I smirked knowing what it said.
I had our waitress leave a note at the bottom asking the question:
'Will you say yes again? -Rich"
With tears in her eyes she nodded yes and slid out of the booth to hug me. The restaurant went up in cheers as I placed the new ring on her finger and kissed her lips.
"You're the best Super Man." She whispered in my ear as we waited on the sidewalk for valet to bring my vehicle.
"Oh I'm not finished yet." I smirked at her as she looked at me for answers.
Valet pulled up in a never driven Meribel White Autobiography LR V-8 Supercharged Long Wheelbase 2016 Range Rover. Grabbing her hand, I took the keys from the young man and walked straight to the driver's side.
"Rich, this isn't our car." Her eyes went from me to the vehicle.
Smiling I place the key in her hands.
"I know. It's yours." I open the door revealing the driver's seat head rest that read 'Stephanie'.
She screamed at the top of her lungs laughing and jumped in. I followed suit and jogged over to the other side and got in. She talked and giggled about it the entire way home. I recorded some of her reaction and posted it on Instagram. I've posted more today than I have all month. Our friends and family starting liking and commenting almost immediately.
***
"Babe I can't believe you did all this." She said in disbelief as she lay on my chest in the bed admiring her new ring.
"You deserve it." I smile taking my attention away from sports center to talk to her.
"You still didn't have to do it Rich. The car itself probably costed you nearly a hundred thousand dollars, let alone this ring. That's too much." She shook her head once she realized how much many I may have spent today.
"Actually it was a hundred and sixty two thousand, and the ring? Don't worry about it." I kissed her forehead.
The ring was another fifteenth thousand. I keep trying to tell this girl I'm doing very well, and I don't have to sale drugs or do anything else illegal for the money I earn either.
"It's not enough for the love of my life. The Range was to say thank you for giving me Deuce and Bunni. The ring was just because... I love you Sweets, and I'm looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you." I spoke looking into her eyes.
She positioned herself on my lap and wrapped her arms around my neck. I rested my hands on her thighs and looked her up and down. She kissed my entire face and finally my neck. She knows that's my weakness. We agreed though, that we wouldn't have sex or any form of it until after we're married. The kiss became more intense and I could tell she wanted to, Lord knows I did. But instead we cuddled up together while I watched Sports Center and she drifted off to sleep on my chest.
The way it should be.
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