The Joke Book

sardonic_clouds

95.4K 4.5K 803

Are you sad and need to laugh? Well here's the answer to cure that sadness, The Joke Book. Filled with jokes... Еще

Joke #1 : Newborn Baby
Joke #2 : Got Any Grapes?
Joke #3 : Who is Mary?
Joke #4 : Going Home
Joke #5 : The Cementary Gates
Joke #6 : Tornadoes and Blondes
Joke #7 : Where Does The Cucumber Go?
Joke #8 : Want A Bag
Joke #9 : Honesty Is Not A Good Quality
Joke #10 : Bad Taste
Joke #11 : Where Does It Hurt?
Joke #12 : Make Me Feel Like A Woman
Joke #13 : Shut Up, You're Next!
Joke #14 : Which Is Further?
Joke #15 : Dirty Things
Joke #16 : 3 Wishes
Joke #17 : Life's Confusing
Joke #18 : Just A Dream
Joke #19 : Not Beating You
Joke #20 : My Dog Is Better
Joke #21 : Car Window
Joke #22 : Wasn't Talking To You
Joke #23 : Girlfriend Search
Joke #24 : Camping Trip
Joke #25 : Sperm Jar
Joke #26 : Like The Way You're Thinking
Joke #27 : Two Hour Delay
Joke #28 : 69
Joke #29 : Ticket Abuse
Joke #30 : Escape Convict
Joke #31 : Lost Her For Sure
Joke #33 : Smallest Dick
Joke #34 : Therapy
Joke #35 : Blowjob = Jewelry
Joke #36 : Three Phases
Joke #37 : I Wish
Joke #38 : Don't Eat It!
Joke #39 : Sex! Sex! Sex!
Joke #40 : Surprise!
Joke #41 : Unlucky Man
Joke #42 : Doctors Visit
Joke #43 : Five Important Qualities
Joke #44 : America VS. Russia
Joke #45 : Ten Dollar Lie
Joke #46 : I Know Your Secret
Joke #47 : 'Heart Attack'
Joke #48 : Rich Vs. Poor
Joke #49 : What Do I Look Like?
Joke #50 : One Word Or Two?
Joke #51 : No Way To Please Women
Joke #52 : Sex Vs. JB
Joke #53 : Dying Confessions
Joke #54 : Mother Of Six
Joke #55 : Expiration Date
Joke #56 : The Neighbor Of The Year
Joke #57 : Don't Know Shit
Joke #58 : Hold The Donkey
Joke #59 : Handjob
Joke #60 : 'Magical Genie'
Joke #61 : Screwed
Joke #62 : Shih Tzu
Joke 63 : Savage Doctor
Joke #64 : Coconut Head
Joke #65 : Comfortable
Joke #66 : Seven Cats
Joke #67 : Trouble and Mind Your Own Business
Joke #68 : Monkey Baby
Joke #69 : Bugs For Dinner
Joke #70 : Smart Jimmy
Joke #71 : Growing Monkey
Joke #72 : Bad Parents
Joke #73 : Report Card
Joke #74 : Crazy Driving
Joke #75 : Heart Attack
Joke #76 : Communication
Joke #77 : No Brain
Joke #78 : Gambling
Joke #79 : Death Wish
Joke #80 : Lucky Number Seven

Joke #32 : Show Him Your Badge

1.3K 56 6
sardonic_clouds

A FEW officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. He tells the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The ranchers says, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there," as he points out the location. The DEA officer verbally explodes saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the federal government with me." Reaching into his back pocket, he removes his badge and proudly displays it to the rancher. "See this badge? This badge means I'm allowed to go wherever I wish. On any land. No questions asked or given. Have I made myself clear? Do you understand?" The rancher nods politely, apologizes, and goes about his chores. A short time later, the old rancher hears loud screams and sees the DEA officer running for his life chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis Bull. With every step, the bull is gaining ground on the officer, and it seems likely that he'll get gored before he reaches safety. The officer is clearly terrified. The rancher throws his tools, runs to the fence and yells at the top of his lungs, "Your badge. Show him your badge!"

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