Someone could tell Cinder her nerves were all fried and dead and she would believe them. In fact she was surprised they were still functioning because they felt like they were on fire.
She sucked in a breath before she forgot to but it was shaky. She mentally cursed. Considering how close her and Kai's bodies were, she was certain he heard the wobbly sound.
They decided (meaning Kai dragged a willing Cinder) to dance with each other late in the night in Kai's room, despite the Peace Ball being three nights ago, an event where she was actually forced to dance. Kai might have said they were dancing tonight but no one could call this dancing. Instead their bodies were so close together that would surely mold together soon as they swayed.
She kept her eyes low and focused on the button on his chest. She felt as if her whole body was in turmoil. Perhaps, if she didn't look at I'm she won't screw up. Kai, being so close, could probably feel the erratic speed of her heart and her failed attempts to control her breathing. She was also 95% sure her hand was shaking while he held it.
Kai, however, seemed perfectly calm, an emotion she envied very deeply in this moment. Perhaps he was lost in thought. Perhaps he was bored. Considering her lack of dancing skills, she reckoned he probably had enough with her.
He sighed suddenly, as if he were reading her thoughts, and the hand on her waist dug deeper into her back. He let go of their interlocked hands and guided hers to his neck. She gulped. He got impossibly closer as their chests met and their legs touched.
"Cinder, my love, you don't have to feel so tense," he murmured, speaking for only the third time this night. They haven't been very talkative, and for good reason. This proximity messed with her ability to breathe, how could she even dare to speak?
"Tense? I'm relaxed." She lied.
"Then look at me while we dance. I promise you won't have to lie when you say that."
Oh no. She had to resist his gaze.
Cinder chuckled awkwardly. "You talk as if your eyes are some magical item and can cure any disease whenever someone looks into them." She said, still refusing to meet his eyes. She feared would melt or at least explode her brain.
Kai sighed again. "Darling." he murmured, almost like he was chiding her. His hand travelled up her body in parallel to his whispers. She felt sparks from his trail, never pulling away, making her shiver. He reached her chin and tilted it up to his face. Oh no.
Their eyes finally met and her skin erupted in goosebumps. Kai's eyes never failed to make her knees weak. A romantic copper that lit up brighter than anything else in is room. What was once the sight she failed to avoid was now the only thing she could look at. She couldn't look away if she tried.
It was hard to believe Cinder had managed to date the Emperor if the Eastern Commonwealth, but if anyone could, it would be the Queen of Luna.
His fingers on her chin moved to caress her cheek. His touch was definitely one of the best things she experienced with him. Her stomach did repetitive somersaults yet it did not bother her. Instead, it excited her, warming her up in the best ways. He moved his hand back to her waist.
"Shall we start again?" he said, already starting to sway. She nodded.
She felt the grip of his hands on her waist the most. In fact, she was sure he was holding her hips now. He tried guiding her back and forth but she could barely think. His eyes muddled her thoughts. She kept messing up the footwork but he reassured her with a knowing smile.
The room started to get stuffy and hot real fast. Why'd she wear long sleeves anyway? With sweatpants? In this warm climate?
Back and forth. Side to side. Cinder forced herself to pay attention so she didn't make a fool out of herself. Her breath came in short breaths that she worked hard conceal. But it was hard to focus when they maintained this kind of eye contact. It was intense and a little frightening, but soon enough Cinder reveled in it.
The atmosphere shifted so quick that she almost didn't notice. Like it was almost... natural. Suddenly there was less observing and more doing. He would slowly drag his hands from her waist to her chest while drawing circles with his fingers. Her own fingers began entangled themselves in his hair, though it was different from her habitual curling. More pulling instead. They seemed to do this on their own. His eyes darkened with something she couldn't recognize. It made her want to do something. Cinder's hands dug deeper into his hair, hugging his face closer to hers. She could feel his breath tickle her mouth.
Warnings popped in her head. Thoughts we're impossible to form. Her eyes trailed to his mouth, carved elegantly on his face, and lips she wanted to kiss. Badly.
She looked up at him to find that he was starting at her lips which slightly parted at the discovery. He licked his own and started to lean in.
They met in the middle with a slow, enjoyable kiss that gradually got more passionate. Soon enough she was pulling at his hair, desperately kissing him without any thought of stopping. He pushed her back until she hit the wall. One of his hands grabbed her cheek while the other explored her lower body.
Kai left her mouth and started again on her throat, sowing kisses up and down on it. She gasped when he reached her collarbone, again when he squeezed her hip, and again when he returned to her lips. Cinder wrapped her arms around his neck, feeling more than content with his actions.
They slowed down a bit until they remembered air existed, panting extensively. His forehead bunched with hers and their lips illustrated matching flimsy smiles.
"I wasn't expecting that." She confessed. Truly, she was surprised, but now that she thought about all the signs he'd been giving she should have at least anticipated it. The right space, the forced warmer climate, the crimson on his cheeks, her mind recalled all of it and truly she should have known better.
"Me neither. I'm not disappointed though." He gave her a tender kiss on her forehead.
"Neither am I." A peck on the cheek.
"Can you ditch the guest room and sleep with your dance partner tonight?" Kai asked. He gave her his signature puppy dog eyes and double downed with a kiss on her jaw.
Cinder sighed. "I hope so, but I have to get my stuff. I always want to, you know."
A kiss on her other cheek. He was starting to pick it up again, as if he was saying 'all right, break over, time for part two, let's go, let's go!'.
"I know." Kai barely grunted out, too preoccupied with sparking kisses on her neck. Cinder felt him care for the kisses he planted with careful detail before. He'd turn her neck into a rose garden soon enough and pick out her own flowers to give to her every morning. She subconsciously threw her head to give him more space. Her body obviously reacted kindly to his advancements. She never knew the lack of control she had over her body, or rather, the amount of control Kai had over hers. It was almost traitorous if she didn't enjoy it.
"Kai, I have to get my toothbrush." No response. He must've not heard her. Now paying attention to the signs, she realized he was lost in a passionate cloud.
He tried to push her even further on the wall that Cinder almost caved in. She decided she needed to put a stop to his activity before it went too far. Or, at least before he reached her lips because then she was confident she wouldn't be able to control the consequences then.
Placing her palms firmly on his shoulders, she pushed gently until he realized what she was doing. His brow furrowed in confusion, then his eyes lost a little of its hungered haze. His face transitioned apologetically. "Sorry, I got a little carried away." He straightened up. "So, will you spend the night with me, a handsome, charming, funny young emperor or in your dusty, unattractive, boyfriend-less room?"
She gave a dry laugh. "I already said yes but I need to get my toothbrush."
He cocked his head. "At this point, just leave it here."
"Well I need that among other things."
"But it's on a whole other floor!" He whined. Cinder held back a chuckle. He was unbearably cute when he couldn't bear to be alone. "Borrow mine if you have to!" She forgot how desperate he gets. The best ego boost ever.
"I'll be quick." This time she made a move and pecked him on the nose. He tried to glare but his ears reddened. "I promise."
She left her spoiled Emperor before he could complain about her absence and practically ran to her room to collect all her things. To be honest, she wasn't sure if she could bear to be alone again either. After so much of Kai, she could barely imagine virtually none of Kai.
The Dark Days. They have been erraticated from her mind with no explanation. She wasn't complaining.
Soon enough she was in front of Kai's door with brushed teeth and fresh clothes.
When he opened the door he looked her up and down, lingering at certain moments, and raised an eyebrow. "Did you forget your toothbrush."
"Uh, no, it's in the bag." She lifted a small tote bag that he was too blind to notice.
"You can always use mine." He repeated. "It's the same as kissing."
"I can assure that it is not the same as kissing, and are the cause of many diseases."
"Such as?"
She snorted. "Delusion. Which you don't need more of." She let herself in, forcing her way through Kai.
"Hey!" he countered. "On what grounds am I delusional?"
Sighing, she plopped herself on his bed. "I don't know. Maybe it's the fact that after I rejected to go to the ball with and you still persisted in asking me."
"Well it worked out in the end, didn't it?" Kai walked towards her in a very slow pace, as if he were executing some scheme.
"A revolution and a failed marriage later, it did."
He reached the foot of the bed and crept on next to her as his goal. She gulped, a feeling of anticipation rose in her chest. "At least you're here with me." He inched closer until he was properly on top of her. "Safe." He murmured, nearing her mouth. "Healthy."
He suddenly grabbed her body, shocking her and inciting a surprised gasp. They flipped positions so that she was now on top of him. "And in my arms."
A giddy and satisfied smile appeared on his face. She had the sudden need to wipe it off his face with her lips. More warnings lit up her vision and she blinked it away, along with the desirous thoughts. But they always lingered, like a short breath on a cold morning.
She didn't know what to do with her arms, or her legs, or her waist. She was very much a ragdoll at this point and she wouldn't have complained if Kai treated her as such. The only thing she could control was her head as it hovered over his. She had a feeling that if she didn't kiss him, he would.
So she did. Slowly, tenderly, and mindfully. Her hands fired up again and found new places to trace on his chest. One of his hands got caught up in her hair while the other gradually palmed the skin of her waist. Cinder might've made a noise or two because Kai abruptly flipped them over again.
There was a 'hmpth' from one of them, she didn't know who nor cared, and once again the kiss turned passionate. He pressed his body against her as the hand on her back slid up her shirt. He returned to her neck as her hands pulled on his pajama shirt. She felt repetitive and slightly painful tugs on her scalp as he tried to make more space for his mouth. It was more enjoyable than expected.
"Stars," He muttered. She thought she imagined it until he kept going. "I love your neck."
The words shocked her, even in that hungered haze. It made want to do something, to want more. She groaned as her hand grabbed his jaw and pushed it up until their lips met. She kissed him with a new type of craving, with the same type of desire from earlier. This is time she didn't suppress it. Her metal hand slipped underneath his shirt and rubbed his back, while her fleshed one tugged his hair in a frenzy. More gasps and small noises were let out. Every time she heard her name escape his lips she would respond by kissing him on the sensitive part of his neck where she'd get more response out of. It gave her more drive to feel and peck his skin, to kiss and suck his lips, to whisper and murmur his name. Her heart pounding in her chest made it all the more intense, and even more so when she could feel his.
The more she thought about them, the more Cinder wanted to smile. While her lips were practically hovering over his ear, she couldn't help but grin, then laughter spilled out. She dug her head into the crook of his neck, trying, and failing, to stop herself.
He pulled away so they met eye to eye. How he got underneath her, she couldn't remember, but, stars, he was gorgeous in this angle. And his shirt was practically undone so her eyes couldn't help but linger. She felt his soft fingers draw circles on the small of her back as he grinned up at her.
"What's so funny, my love?" Kai asked. His voice was rough and lips plump from kissing for so long. It was surprisingly attractive. Well, it shouldn't be surprising because almost everything about Kai is attractive, especially to her.
"I don't know. I just felt like laughing." She let out another giggle. "I feel so..." She paused, searching for the right word.
"Happy? Joyful? Bliss?" He offered.
"Euphoric." She smiled, kissing his nose. She rather liked his nose, as she did his neck, and his face, and oh-so-mangificent eyes, and his elegant hands, and his intelligent voice, and his lips, oh stars his lips! She adored his lips, and how they felt against hers. Especially how they felt against hers.
Her gaze paused at the swollen sight, trying her best to swallow the urge to devour them again. Just how plump could they get anyway?
Kai had other plans. He grinned like an amazed artist satisfied with his work. He brought his hands to either sides of her bare hips, making her heart jump in excitement, and laid her down next to him.
Their eyes met for the thousandth time that night but in this moment she saw stars, galaxies, and universes of wonder in his.
"Kai?" She murmured, breaking the silence.
"Yes, my love?"
"I think I'm going to sleep here tonight."
He smiled, eyes tinkling at the joke. "I think that's a wonderful idea, my love."
He pulled her close so they could fold on each other, limbs intertwining with limbs. She smiled as her cheek pressed to her chest. His leg rested on her hip and his hand played with her locks.
Not very long after, their hearts matched each other's beats and they fell into a long and comfortable sleep.
A/N: This is my apology for the last pic? But it ended happily. And uh this is the steamiest pic I have ever written. Yep.