The way I cannot take these people seriously is so much fun. I hope you enjoy the video up above as much as I do. I died laughing as I watched it for the millionth time.
Ghostfacers!
With all the windows rolled down and We're an American Band playing through the speakers we drove past the Morton house, our latest ghost hunt. It was supposed to only be active every leap year, so we had until sunup.
Sam held a flashlight out of the window at the house as the car slowed slightly.
"So this shouldn't take long, right?" Millie asked. "'Cause I really fucking hate ghost hunting."
"I like the simple ghost hunts we get occasionally." I shrugged as Evie babbled along, holding onto my arm as she stood on the seat. I looked out of the window. "I think I see something moving toward the house."
___
We burst through the door to be met with two men with flashlights and cameras in hand.
"Freeze! Hands in the air! Police officers! Don't move!" Dean yelled, making them freeze.
"Take it east. Let's me see some identification." Sam said, voice calm. "Let's see some ID."
The one man with a headlight on and dressed in full military-esc outfit stuttered out, "Why--Why are we--? Are we under arrest?"
"We are unarmed." The other normal dressed guy said. He looked familiar with his glasses and dirty blonde hair.
Dean snatched the ID from the first, very nervous guy. You want to explain that weirdo outfit, Mr., uh, Corbett?"
"Whoa, I know you." Glasses says.
"Yeah, sure you do. Give me some identification." Dean demanded.
"Hold on a second. I know all of you guys." Glasses continued. "Yeah. Yeah."
"Oh, crap." I said, realizing who this was.
"Holy fuck." Sam muttered.
"What?" Dean asked.
"Uh, west Texas, the tulpa we had to take out." Sam said. "Those two goofballs that almost got us killed."
"The guys who we put a dead fish in the back of their car." I added. "Hellhound.com or something?"
"Fuck me." Dean said after realizing we were right.
Gladly.
"Yeah. We're not hellhounds anymore." Ed--Glasses--stated. "Didn't test that well."
'What's going on?" Corbett asked.
"They're not cops, buddy. No."
"Ed, thought you a had a partner, didn't you? A different guy?" Dean asked. "Is he around here somewhere?"
"Yeah." Ed nodded. "Oh, yeah. He's running around, chasing ghosts."
Millie walked in then, holding Evie out to me. "Take her, she bites."
"Evie, sweetie, we don't bite." I said, taking her. She giggled. "I told you to stay with her in the car." I looked at Millie.
"The fuck's going on here?" Millie looked between Ed and Corbett.
"Okay, well, listen." Dean said. "You and Rambo need to get your girlfriends and get out."
Ed laughed. "Listen here, chisel chest, okay? We were here first. We've already set up base camp. We beat you."
I looked around the old, dusty abandoned house where on a rickety table sat a bunch of equipment for cameras and lights.
Dean turned to Sam, Millie and I. "They were here first."
Ed hummed in agreement, laughing a little.
Dean grabbed Ed by the jacket and shoved him against the wall. "Ed?"
"Yeah?" Ed whimpered.
"Where's your partner?"
"God, he is so hot." I whispered.
"I totally see why you want to have his children." Millie nodded along. I laughed a little.
___
"What're you doing at the Morton House? On a leap year?" Dean asked as we walked into another room where a table was full of more equipment and a laptop. I guess this is base camp. "What are you thinking?"
"We're here to spend the night, okay?" Ed said. "It's for our TV show."
"What? Great. Perfect." Sam remarked.
"Yeah, nobody's every spent the night before." Corbett stated.
"I don't know these dickbags, but they seem like morons." Millie spoke up.
"They are." I told her.
"Uh, actually, yeah, they have." Dean told Corbett.
"Uh, we've never heard of them." Ed said.
"Yeah, you know why?" Dean asked. "The ones that have, haven't lived to talk about it." He snapped.
Ed laughed. "Oh, come on, I don't believe you."
Sam slammed the duffle bag he had down onto the table. "Look, missing persons reports going back almost a half century." He pulled out the stack of papers we'd acquired. "Uh, John Graham stayed on a dare, gone. Julie Wilkerson, gone. There are tons more." He handed Ed the papers. "All of them came to stay the night, always on a leap year. The only body they ever found was the last owner, Freeman Daggett."
"These look legit." Ed stated as he flipped thorugh the reports.
"They are legit. And look, we ain't got much time here, buddy. Starting at midnight, your friends are going to die." Sam stated.
"Baby, come here." Dean called.
I moved toward him. "What?"
"Is it okay if I kill these fucking morons?" He asked quietly, smiling at Evie as she reached out for him.
I laughed a little. "Maybe at least wait until Evie's not in the room."
Dean lifted her into his arms. "Fine."
Evie was nine months old now. It was hard to believe it had only been two months since we'd taken her in. She babbled, looking up at Dean as he bounced her in his arms.
"Is that so?" Dean asked her, smiling. She babbled again, tapping his shoulder. I smiled.
A bunch of panicked voices came barreling down the stairs and into the room. Harry--the dark haired guy who was the co-creator of the website with Ed--was one of them, a dark haired girl and another man with a camera also ran in the room.
They were all yelling loud enough that I was sure someone from town would heard.
"We got one! We got one!" Harry jumped around. "Corbett, we saw one! A full apparition!"
Evie went quiet sinking into Dean's arms and gripping his shirt.
"Get out of here." Ed exclaimed.
"It was a class 4, a spectral illumination." Harry said.
"It was absolutely amazing." The woman--who had been called Maggie, I think--added.
"Everybody shut the fuck up!" Dean yelled, covering Evie's ears. Everyone went deadly quiet. "My poor baby." He rubbed Evie's back, rolling his eyes.
"Damn." Millie muttered. "He sure knows how to command a room."
Everyone looked at us.
"Hey, aren't those the fuckers from Texas?" Harry asked, looking between us.
"Yes." Ed answred.
"Alright, let's have this reunion across the street." Dean said. "Come on, come on. We'll get you ice cream. Our treat. What do you say? Let's go."
"What are you doing here?" Harry asked.
The small group of 'ghost hunters' gathered around the table and the laptop.
"Guys, I think you should listen--" Ed began.
"No, no, no. Look at this. The honest to god proof, alright." Maggie cut him off.
We moved to see the screen as well.
The footage fritzed out then a man in a suit and tie appeared.
Ed and Harry began rambling about what read they got and if it was serious. What class it was and a bunch of other stuff that didn't matter.
I watched as the ghost fell backwards as if he were shot, then disappeared.
Dean set a hand on my waist as we all moved across the room out of earshot, though I knew one camera was on us.
"Think we were off on this?" Sam asked. "That was just a death echo."
"Yeah, but what's it doing here? Did anybody get shot here?" Dean asked as we stepped out of the room and into the hallway by the stairs and front door.
"No, not that I could find." Sam answered.
"Then what the hell is happening?" I asked.
"Sounds like we're all in the dark." Millie stated.
"What's a death echo?" The cameraman, who had been referred to as Spruce, asked.
"Look, if we got a problem here, that ghost ain't it." Sam said.
"What's a death echo?" Spruce asked, moving closer as everyone else bickered in the background.
"Echoes are trapped in a loop, okay?" Dean began. "They keep replaying how they died over and over again usually in the place where they were ganked. They're as dangerous as a scary movie."
"So let's go." I said.
"Maybe the echo's not dangerous, but maybe something else is." Sam stepped back into the room as Dean and I followed.
"You're right. We need to get out of here. Come on." Dean told everyone. "Let's go, let's go, let's go. Pack it up."
"Guys, time is running out." Sam stated.
"We're leaving, everyone." I said. "There's the door, move towards it."
Everyone was talking then. There was not one person who wasn't rambling about something. Sam, Dean, Millie and I were trying to usher everyone out while they all kept on and on about their equipment, tv show, and ghosts.
"We'll make you guys recurring guest stars." Harry told us as we moved toward the door.
"Wait, wait, wait!" Ed yelled, making everyone stop and go quiet. "Where's Corbett?"
"Get out." Dean grabbed the back of Ed's coat and dragged him toward the door.
"No man left behind."
A scream echoed through the house.
"That was Corbett." Spruce stated.
They all start yelling for Corbett and all ran up the stairs.
"Guys!" Sam called out. "Fuck you!"
We followed them up the stairs and through the hall as Corbett screamed again.
"He's not here. Let's go. Let's go back." Sam stated.
Once again, Dean, Sam, and I were trying to usher everyone out, but they fought every chance they got.
"No, no, no. That was Corbett. Didn't you hear that?" Harry asked.
"Sam, get them out of here. Let's go, come on." Dean said loudly, handing Evie to me. "Go with them."
We finally got them back into the hall and heading toward the stairs.
"There we go. Keep it moving." Dean said.
"Looking good." Sam added. Harry began to veer off into another room. "Hey, watch him, watch him."
"Take a left." Dean snapped, giving Harry a shove forward as he set a hand on my waist. "Go, go, go!"
Spruce turned to face us, camera too close for comfort.
Dean shoved it out of the way.