These past few weeks have been an absolute roller coaster. I live with five incredibly beautiful, crazy, dangerous and deadly as fuck women. But here is a couple of things that have happened since the last time we spoke. First off my new landlord happened to be billionaire playboy Bruce fucking Wayne. Because apparently when he had heard of the Joker's rampage last month through the projects he felt that as a city we need to stand United against villains and threats such as him. So he sent down some people from the Wayne Foundation to fix all of the bullet holes, broken drywall, leaky pipes, and even installed some new insulation that wasn't made of fiberglass but would sure as hell cut down on the heating bill. Everyone was surprised to hear this to say the least.
Secondly Harley had found out about what Jinx had done to me and you couldn't even tell whether she was envious or not given how hard she was laughing. Which ended up scaring the absolute hell out of us all as she slowly loaded her six shooter. And like I had thought, sparked something in Blackfire that only caused her to compete with Jinx when it came to how much better she was at sucking me off. Not only did she do the very same thing minus using putting me under a spell, but she also made me bust not one, not two, but three times. It was also like she had no gag reflex which wouldn't surprise me considering how her biology is different than that of a human on earth. Aside from that I was about 60% of the way from having my soul literally sucked of my body through my one-eyed basilisk.
And just like the last time, Ivy had watched. Only this time we actually caught her watching. The others had stepped out to go and get a few things on a shopping run whereas Ivy stayed behind so that she could "tend to the sapling". Blackfire wasn't surprised in the slightest and even said these exact words.
"I knew you were standing there the whole time. Tamaranians have the ability to smell the pheromones that are produced when one wishes to mate. And despite how you smell of the Earth itself, that much hasn't changed in the slightest. So if you would like to join Bumgorf and I then I don't have any objections."
Hearing this made Ivy run for the hills out of sheer embarrassment. For me I missed you weak in the knees to even take a step let alone run anywhere.
But finally and thirdly, ever since everything went down with Joker Harley had been teaching me the basics of gymnastics as well as parkour. She even admitted that she wasn't the absolute best at martial arts but she still knew how to beat someone's ass whenever she would need to do so. However she also tripped me up, intentionally making me wipe out and fuck up.
"If ya think this is bad, trying dodging mid to point blank gunfire!!"
She would yell before judo flipping me over her shoulder, making me collide hard enough with the ground to knock the wind out of me.
"Again!!!"
All I could think was fuck my life as I got back up only to do it all over again, and again and again and again and again and again and again. Jinx and Blackfire would sit on the sidelines and watch this as they ate Popcorn. Sometimes even Ivy would watch, just for kicks. Larissa couldn't care less as she would sun bathe, only to hiss and flash her fangs at anyone who even so much as casted a glance in her direction. After training Harley would be her usual self rather than act more like a drill sergeant. However my inner demon would be whispering shit to me that would have invoked the dark side within Harley, Jinx, Blackfire, and probably Ivy at this point as well.
After training was over I finally took a moment to look at Harley and how she was dressed. She wore a matching Red and Black Sports bra, booty shorts, Sketchers, and crop top hoodie. Showing off her figure which was like that of an Olympic Athlete.
"Why the sudden urge to train me Harley?"
I asked.
"Cause mista when your hanging around trouble, trouble always tends to find ya at some point or another."
She says before going over to the bench and digging through her bag.
"Sure you can handle yourself against more than a few goons but ya only got through it by how stubborn and bull headed you are. Which is why we're gonna change that..."
When she said this she looked towards Larissa who flipped her the bird as she continued to sun bathe.
"You can fuck off and leave me out of this!"
"I'm gonna change that then!"
Harley corrected herself before looking back to me.
"But for now we're gonna be working on your agility, speed, and endurance. Even though I just said you've only made it cause of you bein stubborn, you can still hold your own against in a street fight or against the Joker's crew. It's not every day an average person can do something like that."
I simply shrugged in reply as she tossed me a thing of weighted jump rope.
"And I want to see those feet moving so fast ya look like ya floating now let's get get it!!!"
We trained well into mid afternoon. By the time that we were actually done it felt like my whole body was on fire. Every muscle fiber felt like jello as my hands and knees would not stop shaking. Not only that but the nausea didn't help either. That and the way that Harley kept teasing me in a variety of ways. Posing in a sexy or presumptuous fashion, standing in front of me as I'm trying to brush my teeth as she grinds against my crotch, and she even set up these things in the ceiling to where she can now swing or hang upside down in the living room while covering up all her juicy bits with the fabric she entangled herself in.
The girls who also like to tease me we're up to their usual stuff whereas Ivy was acting nervous around me lately, shy and timid when it was just the two of us but when the others were nearby or in the same room she'd be her normal self. I didn't want to pressure her into telling me what was on her mind so I decided to wait for when she was ready to talk and focus on training and work. However I also felt like something was off. Not with the girls but rather, I was having one of those feeling that people get before something bad happens like the calm before the storm. After dinner that night I had stepped out onto the balcony with a fat ass Philly in hand to have some alone time to myself.
Timeskip: 2 Days Later.....
When I had awoken from my stupor I hadn't the faintest idea of where I was. Only who I was and why I was here in the first place. I was strapped down to the kind of Gurney that allows you to adjust it so that whomever is strapped down to said gurney can be vertical. As I was pushed down the dimly lit hallway I watched the lights overhead slowly pass me by before I was wheeled into an octagon shaped room to which I wasn't alone in. With me was Larissa, some Australian guy who had a fetish for boomerangs in the Flash, the real life adaptation of Maui from Moana, someone who looked like they could be the twin brother of Michael Jai White but with dreads, a guy with an eye patch and white hair sportin the Daddy'O who leaned against the wall with his arms crossed, a woman who gave me the chills just by looking at her, and another guy who just sat against the wall staring at the lady who stood next to this Captain America looking guy minus the spangly outfit and shield and add a beard.
"Good morning to you Task Force X, and welcome to what will hopefully be the last days of your pathetically wasted lives."
The woman said as I blinked my eyes open.
"Who's the cunt which has an Eifel Tower sized stick up her YEEAAAAAARGH!!!"
I screamed as she shocked me with something.
"Did I say Eifel Tower? I meant Mt. Everest!"
I then got zapped again before Captain Amerifuck socked me in the face.
"Keep it up and your funeral will be a closed casket."
The woman says before turning back to the others.
"I am the Director of A.R.G.U.S. Amanda Waller and this here is my right hand Colonel Rick Flag..."
The Australian guy then decided to cut Waller off mid sentence.
"Hold on a fucking minute, I'm with the drango! Why the hell are any of us even ARRRRRGHH!!!!"
When he got zapped I realized what it was that was making my brain feel so tingly.
"Each of you have been given a subdermal explosive implant which doubles as a neutralizing device whenever you are in need of redirection."
Flag said as he switched off the guy's implant.
"You step out of line or go against orders...boom.
"Thank you Colonel, now that you know you can't leave unless you want what's left of you to be in a mop bucket there is an upside to your situation."
Waller explained as the others shot daggers at her with the looks in their eyes.
"The missions that you will undertake are strictly off the books. So much so that they aren't even considered to be Black ops. However the upside to all of this is for every mission that you complete or survive I should say would be years deducted off of your sentence. But for those of you that aren't here on multiple life sentences this would be considered community service."
She said that last bit while looking at me.
"Meaning that if you complete this mission with your life intact you get to go free."
She just had to say that shit in a room filled with dangerous people.
"As for the rest of you that isn't so."
I looked at Larissa worried when she heard this but only flicked her tongue as Waller allowed Flag to take the lead.
"Alright then, for you mission you are to break into Arkham Asylum and retrieve data from Edward Nigma, Jonathan Crane, and Julian Day. Even though you have multiple targets however you only have to go to one place to retrieve all the data we need."
"And that would be where exactly?"
The Michael Jai White lookalike asked.
"The office of the Head Psychiatrist Dr. Hugo Strange. The people previously mentioned are patients of Dr. Strange..."
I then felt the need to say it.
"Marvel's calling in regards to a copyright strike!"
I shouted out loud.
"Anyway.... these patients of his know a great deal about a lot of classified Intel that we don't want falling into the wrong hands, especially the good doctor's. You are to infiltrate the Asylum without raising alarms, retrieve the data, and get out. All that you'll need to find is one Hugo Strange's hard drive which is protected with biometric security and voice recognition software. And I know one among you is an expert when it comes to that sort of thing."
Flag said this as he looked to the guy who was sitting against the wall.
"Is there any questions...good, we move out at 19:30."
After he left the room they didn't even unstrap me from the table which was complete and utter bullshit. I was in a room filled with the deadliest mercenaries and assassin's that money could buy as well as a walking shark that was sniffing me like I was lunch.
"Nom nom?"
He asked.
"Nooooo nom nom, I'm definitely not nom nom!!"
I panicked before the shark took one more whiff and walked away as I sighed with relief. The woman with the cold shoulder then came over and undid the straps on the gurney for me.
"Here you go, Waller is pretty cold to say the least."
"Thanks, and ice puns aside I already kinda of figured that out."
I said as I offered her my hand.
"Damien Hoechlin."
The woman took my hand as she used only a bit of her powers to make permafrost form over my hand.
"Caitlin Snow, but most know me as Killer Frost."
"So what's your story pretty boy?! What did ya do to piss off the queen bitch herself?"
The Australian asked as he pulled out a cigarette and lit one up right then.
I simply shrugged.
"Aiding and a bedding an intergalactic convict as well as a couple of this planet and housing a couple of ex cons."
"Would I know any of them?"
He continued.
"Does the name Harley Quinn ring a bell?"
I asked as everyone looked at me.
"What?"
"You've gotta be out of your fucking mind."
The Michael Jai White says.
"For you to be roommates with her is crazy enough by itself."
"Haha, you're alright eh! Having a bunch of ladies in the same place and being the only guy out them all is what every man's dream should be!"
The Australian says as he wrapped his arm around my neck.
"Digger Harkness, but everyone knows me as the nefarious Captain Boomerang!"
I notched an eyebrow.
"Didn't you get your ass beat and your clothes stolen by the Flash?"
I asked.
"I could have sworn I saw that on the news awhile back. And where did you keep your smokes, in your prison purse I bet right?"
Digger then backed away in a huff.
"No!! I uh...fuck you.."
"No thanks, and even if I swung both ways I wouldn't fuck you if you were the last piece of ass on the planet."
Caitlin, Michael Jai White, and the other guy except for Eye patch and Shark Head all snickered and laughed.
"Damn he just roasted the fuck out of you."
The who was sitting against the wall then gets up and walks over to me.
"Eric Needham, I go by Black Spider."
Michael Jai White then got up and introduced himself as well.
"Benjamin Turner, Bronze Tiger."
"What about you eye patch, also where's your parrot?"
The man got up without saying a word until he was nose to nose with me.
"I'm not the kind of person you want to make enemies with boy. So enough of the the jokes unless you want your tongue ripped out."
Just as he said this we all heard a hissing noise as gas was pumped into the room. Eyepatch simply sat down criss cross applesauce as Digger, Benjamin, Eric, Caitlin, and Shark Head were all going what the fuck.
Almost immediately everyone was knocked out and on the floor. The last thing I remember seeing clearly is Eyepatch being the only one to be surrounded by 30 guards armed to the teeth as they but they ensnared him with a weighted net which he grabbed and threw back in their faces before he went ham. Smacking and kicking them all across the room like it was nothing to him. He looked like he was just as trained if not more that Batman himself. But in the end he was shot in the back with nearly a dozen or so tranq darts before they were able to use stun sticks and get him to the ground as they then kept stomping on him until finally the tranquilizer kicked in on top of the gas. From there he had been shackled from head to toe and even had a metal muzzle that covered half of his face as well as the collar that they put around his neck.
Very Short Timeskip.....
When I woke up I was in the middle of an empty courtyard with the others. In front of us was several crates with our names printed on the sides. Digger rushed to his like he was opening gifts on Christmas. The others did the opposite.
"Oh you beauty!!!"
Digger exclaimed as he pulled out his specialized boomerangs.
When the other looked into theirs they began turning away from one another as they put their gear on.
I began to do the same and would have thought this to be a pretty great moment with me getting a suit like this. You know aside from the obvious circumstances that is.
After we had all gotten ready I looked to Eyepatch who's suit made him look even more menacing that what he was.
"What are you looking at?"
He snarled and before I had a chance to answer in comes a fucking pelican drop ship and with it another woman who looked dangerous as fuck but attractive at the same time wearing a mask and had a sword strapped to her hip.
Just then Colonel flag decided to grace us with his presence once again.
"Alright now you degenerates it's time to mount up. But before we do so allow me to introduce you to Katana. She'll be your babysitter for the duration of this mission. Also I wouldn't try and piss her off. The sword that she wields is an enchanted weapon. For so whenever she takes a life the soul of whoever she kills is trapped within that sword."
"And the bombs in our necks wasn't enough?"
Caitlin asked.
"It's an added insurance policy."
Flag replied.
"Seems more like literal overkill to me."
Eric muttered.
Me trying to alleviate the tension in the air decided to go up and introduce myself personally.
"Damien Hoechlin, nice to meet you in person Yamishiro-San, Harley told me about your perfume and dare I say that Eau De Death suits you."
Before I could even blink she had the tip of her blade at my throat.
"Don't test me, I don't care if you are like them or not. If you cross me or deviate from Mission in any way it won't be Waller that will be taking you head."
Eyepatch then chuckled as he brushed his way past me.
"Haha, I like her already."
After that we all loaded up onto the pelican and flew off towards Gotham with the only thought on my mind being of the girls back home.
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Hello there everyone, sorry about the late update. I've just been dealing with a few personal things and work has been kind hectic as well. But having said that I'll be doing my best to try and upload weekly rather than every other day.
I hope you all enjoyed part one of fuck I don't know how many parts as I have quite a few ideas as to how I want this next Arc to go. Which is also the reason why I'll be uploading weekly so that way I can map out where and how I want this next portion of the story to go.
But please leave a comment or two and smash that like button and don't forget to follow as well and share with your friends as well as your own followers on any and all social media!!!