AFFILIATION AND BLISS [PART 1...

By heartdevilxoxo

14.5K 1.1K 2.1K

two loser girls finding their place on the moral compass. asa mitaka x female reader fanfic :3 [PART 2 IN PR... More

an unwanted interaction
a mind that's been changed
the morning sun is yellow
the midnight moon is blue
peer into the window of my heart
be the sun that shines
give me a moment to breathe
don't put me in my place, feline!
your secret wouldn't be safe with me
look at this cool pebble
russian roulette is not the same without a gun
give me the thing i love (or don't)
i'm trying to tell you something, something that i already said
i hope nobody catch us
it almost worked
then dive inside the mindset of a killer
trade your dreams with mine
i can't sleep no more
get your face between my thighs
caught in-between love and fear
it's the thuggish ruggish bone
YOOOOO, CHESS T! (side chapter)
are you really who they idolize
i, i really wish you'd make up your mind
you don't have to speak, don't need to talk to me, baby, i already know
watch you weigh your powers
go, use your muscle, carve it out, work it, hustle
take a step back, letting go of the fear
together we'll mend your heart
i wanna take you away.
wrong move, ya dead, that girl is poison
then sink the teeth and bat your eyes
and now look at 'em, look at 'em, now, look at 'em sting
you got my heartbeat running away
must be love on the brain
all i wanted was you
in tune with all our dreams
WORSHIP! PLAY, PLAY! WORSHIP! PLAY, WORSHIP! PLAY! WORSHIP! WORSHIP!
go waste your breath somewhere to someone new
i already told her, if we gon' do it, then we gon' do it my way
just as i'd rehearsed over in my brain
forgive me and the world outside your room
i drink the poison right from your hands
you should wake up before the wrath comes
me and you could take off before the wrath comes
it's a scary night like trick or treat, i wanna scare her
there's a hole in the earth, i'm out
shut up and relax, don't lose your head
a cold soul seeking warmth
now did you get it? get it, so write it down
you should know by now, really, that this could end, really
now ask yourself why it never ends
then why are you here?
next to the infant crying in your heart
rises the moon
you will never be free
decide! decide, is this it, is it just fine?
i swear i'll only make you cry
i've watched you change, now you feel alive
goodnight, hearts. (authors note)

new scars, same war

105 11 47
By heartdevilxoxo

Asa lays her head upon your shoulder, hugging your arm as you continue to sit in silence. You start thinking about everything that'd happened.

Chester's gone.

So is Mai, thankfully.

Well.

Not yet.

You pull your heart out with your left hand so you don't have to move Asa off of you.

"Hearts, disconnect."

Mai's heart pops out of yours and falls on your lap. It's faintly beating. You put your heart away, grabbing hers and crushing it immediately.

"What was that? I.. can't really see anything." Asa says, lifting her head off your shoulder.

"Crushed Mai's heart."

"Oh.. good riddance. She was so fake.. was only trying to eat us that whole time."

"Maybe.. I dunno. It didn't seem fake. It's not like she hated us, or it would've been obvious cuz I would've been able to feel that radiating from her all the time."

"I guess it's just.. in her nature, then. She was the one copying us, though, right?"

"Yeah, and she'd been feeding us human meat the whole time."

"WHAT?! EW! GROSS!"

"RIGHT?!"

"..Why does human meat taste like pork then? Ew.. ugh, now I feel sick.. well, more sick, I already felt sick."

"You've been feeling sick a lot lately, y'know."

"Oh, I wonder why."

"Yeah.."

"..I was trying to be sarcastic. Like, I've been feeling sick because we've been fighting a lot."

"I totally knew you were being sarcastic, like, duh, that was obvious."

"..."

"Totally."

"..Y/N, do you think we should maybe just die?"

"NO?!"
"No."

You hear Yoru from beside you.

"A-Asa, wh.. why would you say that? We can't just.. like.."

"Y/N, we're being hunted and have no place to live. Chester's dead. We have nobody to go to. We have no more weapons and we're eventually going to be found. They won't just call it off.. this.. this is our life now."

"W-We can find a place.. we're definitely not gonna be living in this alley.."

"I agree with Y/N. You're being irrational, Asa."

"I'M irrational?! I told you both we needed to run, and guess who didn't listen! AND, Y/N, you changed my emotions without asking!"

"We can't just die!"

"..Seems like the best option."

"..So you'd just.. rather die than trying to survive this with me?"

"That's not what I'm saying."

"That's exactly what you're saying, Asa."

"Then what do we do? Kill everyone that tries to kill us?"

"..I guess?"

"You guess."

"Well, we can't just die, you idiot. Don't say that shit, man. We've already almost died too many times recently, I don't wanna waste that luck since we're somehow still alive."

The only response she gives is a sigh as she rests her head back onto your shoulder.

"..."

"I'm sorry. Everything's just really overwhelming."

"I know, Asa."

"..."

"Speaking of.. death, um.. this is gonna sound kinda.. weird, but, when Yoru was heading back to the apartment to get Chester, Mai was chasin' me down an alley, right?"

"..Uh huh..?"

"I heard a voice in my head. It kinda sounded like me, but.. not?"

"So, like, just your inner voice?"

"No, it wasn't a thought, it was a voice."

"What'd it say?"

"It said my name a few times, some shit about reality, and that my "D-Day was here" or something like that."

"..D-Day?"

"Yeah, then it told me to save it, and when I turned around, Mai was about to eat my heart."

"..Didn't you write a poem titled "Countdown to D-Day"..?"

"..Yeah."

She gets up and pulls you off the "bag" you've both been sitting on, beginning to untie it. "Hand me your heart real quick."

You pull your heart out and feel for her hand, giving it to her. She kisses it, and it immediately begins to glow, causing you to giggle a little bit. The glow lightens the alley enough for you to see. She goes through your stuff and grabs your notebook. "You said the poem was about a really long dream you had, right?"

"Well.. a reoccurring dream, yeah."

"Reoccurring? You still have it?"

"Y-Yeah, sometimes.. more than sometimes.."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Didn't wanna worry you."

She sighs and flips through the notebook until she finds it. "Can I read it?"

"Don't see why not.." You both sit down next to each other as she places your heart in her lap.

It reads:

"Through my heart's symphony, my will to protect you would flow,
Through my recklessness, forever blinded by my dream,
Through my fate, my reality will forcefully show,
Through my death, the light I yearned for would never be seen."

"..Was there a person in your dream?"

"Well.. uhh.. I mean, kinda.. in the dream, it'd always go like, me protecting someone, then I'd fuck up while protecting them, and I'd die. And I'd always think right before I'd go.. that.. I didn't get the love I wanted.. and then I'd wake up. I didn't wanna tell you cuz it's kinda weird.. and it sounds a bit concerning."

"..A bit? That voice you heard might've been your heart if it told you to save it, then you turn around, and, boom, your heart's in danger."

"..Oh."

"Meaning "D-Day", judging by this poem and your dream, means death day."

"..Oh.."

"Were.."

"..."

"W-Were you supposed to die today? Are you GONNA die today??" You hear her voice starting to crack as she speaks.

"I-I don't know.. I.. hope not..?"

She puts the notebook down and hugs you, clasping onto you. Her chest begins to subtly bump.

"A-Asa?" You hug her back. The moment you do, she squeezes you rather hard as she begins to cry.

"You would've died! No, you were going to! It said "recklessness", and you were being extremely reckless earlier! If you pulled your heart out before the devil hunters came.. if.. you.. nghh.. you.."

"Asa.. you're.. well, you're probably right, but, hey! I'm not dead! If I were gonna die, I'd probably die then!"

"No! It says while you were protecting someone! That someone might me be next if we're found! That obviously wasn't a dream, it was a memory!"

"I don't really NEED to protect you, though. Yoru basically protects you."

"And what if she gets forced out of my body?! Or if SHE needs protecting?!"

"..W-Well.. um.. I don't know.. you're both not really weak, y'know.."

"That's not.. that's not the point, Y/N.. I just.. I can't lose you."

"You ain't gonna lose me, Asa. If I was really gonna die, I woulda been dead by now.. kinda surprised I'm not. That's why we gotta stay strong and keep on living. If it really is my actual fate rather than my dream fate, then fuck fate." You lean her off of you and hold her face.

"I'm not going anywhere. From this point on, I'll never leave your side for any excuse. Even if I gotta use the bathroom, I'll drag you with. If I go somewhere, you'll come too, vice versa. I know you're scared, I know you're really, really scared, and I.. kinda am, too, but.. we've gone through a lot together. Sure, can't change the past, but we can change the future. For now, we gotta find a place to stay where we'll be somewhat comfortable, then.. well.. I guess we can keep trying to fight Chainsaw Man."

"We'll hold off on that for now." Yoru says out of no where, bent down next to you both.

"Huh? Why?" You look over at her.

"You only said that because you assumed that's my main focus right now. It's very possible we could die aside from fighting him. We don't have a chance right now. I've realized we need more than weapons."

"..So.. what do we need then?"

"Reliable forces."

"So other strong people?"

"Of course. A large portion of society hates Chainsaw Man as I do. War can be brought upon him with enough.. convincing."

"Do you mean actual convincing or coercion.."

"Convincing."

"Huh."

"Coercion if necessary."

"..Huh. Okay. Um.. okay, that's a decent plan.."

You look back at Asa. She seems to be listening, but she's staring at your heart.

"Do you feel any better, Asa?"

"..A bit, yeah.. um.. how would we find those people who hate him?"

"Protests, maybe. There's gotta be a group or something.. like, a rebellion."

"If there's ever protesting, we'll start there and ask around. I doubt devil hunters would be there searching through a large crowd to find us." Yoru says, standing up. "We still need to establish a living situation."

"Nah, I've got an idea. There's internet cafes popping up around, and it's 24/7 with food and stuff. People sleep there pretty often, but we do have to pay."

"Internet?"

"Yeah, like.. computers and stuff. Sounds pretty cool.. Asa, you've got a good amount of money back at your apartment, right?"

"Y-Yeah, I do.. I don't know how long it could last us, though."

"Don't worry, we can just sell some of our stuff to homeless people or something if we ever run low on money."

"Okay.. let's go to my apartment, then.. it's been a while, so the hunters might not be there."

"I sure fuckin' hope not."

After tying your blanket back up and climbing on top of the building behind you, you both start traveling by rooftop. Eventually, you find her apartment. The sun's fully up now.

You peek over the edge of the building you're on and look around. Nothing really suspicious.. the lack of nothing suspicious is inherently suspicious.

"Should we just stake it out and wait to see if anyone walks out or shows up? They've definitely already been there, but they might still be in your apartment.. waiting." You say, sitting on the roof.

"I'd say yes, but it's kinda hot out here."

"I'd rather be hot than get sniped from the hallway, dude.."

"Okay, true." She sits down next to you and starts poking your knee.

You immediately begin to feel bored.

"We should've grabbed that Gameboy on the way out of Mai's."

"Why would we have grabbed it then, we were running for our lives.."

"I'm just saying we shoulda grabbed it, man."

"We could play rock paper scissors to pass the time."

"Oh, hell yeah! Yoru, keep a look out for us, 'kay?"

"Fine. Don't be too loud, I know you both like to yell when you lose."

You sit in front of each other, both holding your fists in your hand.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

You both chose scissors.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

You both chose rock.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

You both chose scissors again.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

You both chose scissors.. again.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

And again.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

Now you both chose paper.

"Dude, what the hell! Stop choosing what I'm choosing!" You yell.

"It's not my fault! You're choosing what I'M choosing!"

"Nuh uh!"

"Yuh huh!"

"Nuuuh uuuuh!"

"I told you two to be quiet, shut up."

"Jeez, just let us wind down.."

"Yeah, Yoru.."

"..."

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

Chose scissors.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

Rock.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoo!"

Oh, finally, she chose paper and you chose.. rock..? IDIOT!

Before you begin throwing a fit, Yoru points a finger up at you and then points down at the street. You and Asa peek over the roof, spotting four devil hunters walking down the apartment complex stairs. Holy shit, your suspicion due to the lack of suspicion was right.

A car pulls up and they all get in. As they get in, you spot a.. lady.. she looks kinda hot.

"Dude, that white haired chick is super pretty.." You say, pointing.

"Right.. her eyepatch is cool.."

"Totally wouldn't have ran if she was there during the fight, dude.."

"Will you two stop googling your eyeballs or whatever the phrase is and get ready to go down there?"

"Sorry."
"Sorry."

As the car drives away, you both wait a minute or so before jumping down and running towards the stairs.

As you enter the building and make your way to her apartment, you slow down as you approach the door.

"What if one is still in there?" Asa says as she completely stops.

"Well.. I'll go in first 'n make sure. They might've set up cameras and stuff if not, though." You take your heart out and hand it to her. "Hold onto my heart for me in case there is someone in there, okay? I'll scream if someone's there. If so, run."

"I'm not gonna leave you behind. We're sticking together from now on, remember?"

"Okay.. just.. fight with my heart, then."

You grab onto the doorknob and take a deep breath, opening it.

As it creaks open, you see things all over the floor. They definitely went through everything. You slowly walk around, checking all the rooms and walking to her bedroom.

"M-M-Mreow.." Huh.

Melly is sitting on her bed, curled up in a ball with his fur sticking up. "M-Melly?"

"O-Oh.. ermm.. h-hello.."

"Is anyone still here..?"

"Ermm.. no.. I was very.. frightened.. they seemed a bit frustrated.."

"ASA! Nobody's here!"

She walks in her room and frowns at the sight of the mess, then looks at Melly. "Oh.. hey, Melly.."

"Ermm.. where's Chester?"

"..."
"..."

"Ermm.. your silence isn't very comforting.."

You sit down next to him and pick him up, petting his back.

"He's, um.. he's gone, Melly."

"..G-Gone?"

"..Yeah."

"As in.. dead?"

"..Yeah.."

"O-Oh.. e.. e-ermm.."

"I'm sorry.."

"If he's.. gone.. my ability to speak is still present."

"It wasn't a contract, right?"

"N-No.."

"Then it was probably a permanent physical change or something. We can still see Yoru. If it was a contract, it probably wouldn't have lasted."

"W-Was.. was his death quick?"

"I.. I think it was. He might've been reborn already, though he won't remember us and he might be a small kitten."

"I shall.. I shall find him. You two.. erm.. cannot stay here. They'll surely come back soon enough."

"Yeah.. we're gonna be at an internet cafe near here. Asa, let's shower and change real quick so we don't go around looking all bloody."

"Okay, but emphasize the quick part."

It was pretty quick. Only, like, 15 minutes. You both start packing most of her things in a suitcase she has.

"Wait, we should check the news real quick." Asa says as she turns the TV on and flips through the channels.

Oh, no.

"At around 4 AM this morning, a battle with Chainsaw Man wrecked havoc on a part of the city. The three seemed to be devils, and one was found dead at the scene. The other two got away, but they've been identified as students from Fourth East High School. Asa Mitaka and Y/N L/N attempted to kill Chainsaw Man, but escaped from devil hunters that arrived during the battle. There is an ongoing man hunt for the two. If you have any tips or they're spotted, please call.."

"Oh, great. They have our school pictures on display." Asa says, turning the TV off. "People will definitely recognize us."

"Got any scissors?"

"Huh."

"They'll probably recognize you the most, and my eyes are different from the picture. Gotta give you a hair cut, man."

"H-Huh?.. I don't know if I trust you with my hair.."

"Oh, c'mon, I'll make you look good. It'll just rest on your shoulders."

"..Okay, fine, I need a haircut anyway." She goes to her bathroom and comes back with scissors. "Don't mess my hair up or I'll kill myself." She says as she hands you the scissors. You're now extremely stressed about giving her the haircut.

As you do, you can hear her giggling excessively.

"Why're you gigglin' so much?" You say as you part her hair.

"S-Sorry, I giggle when I'm nervous sometimes.."

"Oh, what, you don't trust me?" You say as you snip away.

"I-I do, I'm allowed to be nervous, though.."

After a few minutes, and a lot of hair on the ground, you both walk to the bathroom and she gasps.

"Weeell? Ya like it?"

"It's.. so shaggy."

"That's not an answer."

She leans into the mirror and turns her head left to right. "Huh.. yeah, I kinda do.."

"Kinda?! You're so mean, dude.."

"No, no, I like it! I definitely look different.. it's kinda emo, actually."

"BAHAHA! EMO!"

"IT'S NOT COMPLETELY EMO! Thank the universe you didn't give me.." She pauses to shiver. "..side bangs.."

"Yeah, you'd look weird with side bangs. Umm.. should I cut my hair, too?"

"We should totally dye it."

"I'd just stand out more then."

"True, nevermind. I'm dying your hair someday."

"Well.. you only live once, aside from me, so we can get some later. Oh, wait, dude, I just realized something."

"What?"

"We don't have to go to school anymore!"

"..That's kind of a bad thing, don't you think?"

"What! No, school fucking sucks and all the people there are assholes."

"Okay, true.. we probably won't see Denji anymore."

"Probably not.. poor guy. Yoshida's dead, too, so aside from us, I don't really think he had any friends."

"Well, he has that.. uh.. I wanna say sister, but he said roommate too, so.. he has her, so he'll probably be fine."

"Probably."

"He's definitely gonna hate us after he sees the news, knowing we tried to kill his hero."

"Oh, definitely."

"Another friend gone.." She sighs and messes with her bangs in the mirror. "Alright.. let's go to that stupid internet cafe. And, gimme your jewelry, I'm kinda rocking this emo thing."

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