Watts was not expecting to be moved to a different room--or to find Cinder there.
"This again?" he said.
"You sure you want to do this alone?" Royal asked Cinder.
"Yes," she said, with a warning look.
"We'll be outside," Oscar said.
They left.
"I really enjoy these little tête-à-têtes with old friends," Watts said dryly, "but I don't have any new information."
"This room isn't tapped," Cinder said.
"Why would I believe that? And why would it matter?" Watts asked.
"Because we both know what happens if anyone finds out that you talked," Cinder said. "And you're not much use to us dead, for now. So this is not going to be recorded. I suggest you don't waste the chance to speak off the record."
"If you're telling the truth, you are quite the fool," Watts said. "But why should I believe you?"
Cinder just stared at him coldly.
The silence became uncomfortable for Watts.
"Well, if it is true, I still have no reason to provide any information." He sat back, shrugging. "Do you think they would contact me when I've been arrested?"
"Did you know about the attack on Menagerie?" Cinder demanded.
"I suspected they would target it," Watts said, "based on how vulnerable it was compared to Argus or any other large city. The bandits have no regard for the Faunus anymore than anyone else. It's the perfect place to make a statement. Though whatever beating those animals would prove, I don't know."
Cinder didn't care to waste her time asking him why he cared so little or how much he'd really known. Too late for that.
She moved closer and lowered her voice.
"I know why you only told us as much as you did before," she said. "And why you said nothing about Menagerie. You must have known that they wanted to take me in alive. All this time, and you're still not over that humiliation. You would sacrifice thousands of people's lives, potentially, not only to get what you wanted for yourself, but to get revenge."
"And what of it?" Watts smiled smugly. "You would do the same."
Cinder had heard that one too many times from him.
"Once," she replied stiffly, "but not now. Even you would realize, I'd think, that it only hurts you in the long run if these people go down. They protect your existence."
"But I do not have my freedom," Watts said. "Being watched like a dog is so beneath me--always compared to the others around here."
"Do you ever get tired of stroking your own ego?" Cinder shook her head. "I guess it is like looking into a mirror. I wonder if I sounded as idiotic as you do now."
"What an odd thing to hear you say," Watts said.
Cinder smiled in a way he didn't really like. "I've moved on, Arthur. I can admit I did stupid things back then because I've actually learned to do better. But, as you've never learned, it must be uncomfortable for you to fail so many times."
"How droll." Watts scowled at her. "I hope they do kill you. If you insist on going after them, it'll happen. But that never stopped you before from doing anything foolish."
"With all the failures, in the end, it served me better to take risks than it has served you to try to play both sides," Cinder noted. "And now, you're trapped. They will not save you, since you've been caught. And you will never get away, not with Theodore's ability and manpower. Where could you hide? Your only chance is if we catch them."
"And you think you would survive that?" Watts asked.
Cinder leaned in more. "Why would it bother you if I didn't?"
Pause.
Watts suddenly chuckled. "You do make a good point. What do I have to lose by leading you to them? You'd never make it out alive. If you all kill each other, that works out better for me. But alas, I do not know where their true hideout is."
Cinder made a fist and slammed it into the table he was tied up at.
"Calm down." Watts was a little nervous about her actually doing something to him still. "I may have some helpful advice. You might want to know why they decided to take you alive."
Cinder looked down. "Did you tell them to?"
"How clever of you to guess," Watts said. "The truth is, not exactly. Of course, after you interfered in their plans the first time, their messengers contacted me to ask if there were any weaknesses of yours they could exploit to...eliminate you. I merely hacked the flight logs of Argus and who was on assignment to narrow down where you must have been located."
"So that was you," Cinder said.
"Hmm, your friends' uncanny ability to spirit people away before they're assassinated came into play again," Watts said. "Since you took refuge in Argus, they needed a change of plans. But I told them you would never let such an attack slide. You would go after them. And so you did. And so you will, again."
"Unless I didn't because you told me that," Cinder said.
Watts shrugged.
"That wouldn't matter," Cinder said slowly. "Staying put isn't any safer."
"You're catching on now," Watts said. "I think Mala will kill you if she can't capture you. Unless you find them first. But then she'll kill you anyway. This is a win-win for me."
It was clear he expected this to be a moment of making Cinder feel he'd outsmarted her and had her checkmated.
But it didn't have this effect.
"So in the end, I have nothing to lose," she replied coolly. "And if we can beat them, it's just that much more satisfying."
Watts frowned at her. "Are you really that arrogant?"
"Well, one of the team said recently that there's no point fearing the inevitable," Cinder said. "And I would agree with that... I think there's something you want me to do, because of what you're telling me. Something reckless. But there's nothing to do that they wouldn't expect."
"I suppose," Watts said. "That is likely. Unless you gave up. But that's not in your nature."
"No." Cinder frowned at him. "It isn't."
"Nevertheless, they wanted to take you alive because they thought it would be of use to them," Watts said. "You have enemies in that tribe, naturally. I'm sure they prefer to exact revenge in person. But Mala herself, the leader, has an interesting reason to want to see you in person first."
"What reason could that be?" Cinder asked. "I've never met the woman."
"No," Watts said. "I'm not even sure what it was. I gave them a lot of information about you and your origins. I hope you don't mind. Perhaps she has an interest in orphans who were cast aside by Mistral. That would be many of the people who work for her. Or it's your work with Salem--far more likely, since they're using Grimm."
"If that's it, I would never tell her anything about that," Cinder said. "I've put that behind me."
"Yes..." Watts said, with a kind of hatred that was surprising for a response to that statement.
Cinder paused. "That's why you hate me, isn't it?" she said. "It's because I did what you could never dare to do. And they accepted me, sort of. But not you. You can't stand that I'm getting praised for changing my trajectory and you aren't. You can't stomach that I surpassed you in any way-- or in every way."
"You can fool them, but not me," Watts said. "I know you would never actually change. People really don't, they just pretend. They're liars."
"It would take one to know one," Cinder said. "You're the liar. And I'm not the same."
"Oh?" Watts said. "You think you're different now? Stronger? More noble? Smarter? Then why is it that flyer guy who came in here with you is always bailing you out?"
"What?" Cinder said, frowning.
"I've heard things," Watts said. "Mind you, he's not as high on their list, but I do think they're getting a little sick of him getting in the way of their getting you. It does seem every time they nearly do, he shows up. I'm impressed, Cinder, that you've converted anyone to follow you again."
"He's not following me." Cinder was too surprised to be as cautious.
"Why else is he always there? Raven assigned you as partners for a reason, no doubt," Watts said. "Unless it's something else... Oh my, could it be he has feelings for you?"
He contrived to make that sound shocking as well as mocking in the same tone.
Cinder looked away so that if she turned red he wouldn't see it. But that didn't hide it as well as she thought.
"That's ludicrous," she said. "No one would do that."
"I agree that it is ludicrous, but you do attract the headcases," Watts said. "I can't understand it, though. He hates me for his poor father's sake, but doesn't seem to see it as hypocritical to be loyal to you? I suppose all Atlesians are in it for themselves in the end. Their better morals are always a show."
"This doesn't matter,." Cinder was getting angry at him, for some reason, though she knew this was a trick.
"Well, he's a fool." Watts didn't let up. "Whatever he thinks he's going to get from you by doing this, I know that you only use people and then discard them once they are no longer of use. I suppose once the bandits find him, you'll find a new victim. You're not any different than you were, always using another person to take the hits for you so you can escape."
"I'm not using him," Cinder said, fiercely. "Whatever it is you're trying to get out of me about this, it's not going to work. It would be better for you to focus on savings your own skin."
"My, my," Watts said. "You're getting awfully emotional about this, Cinder."
"No, I'm not... You're disgusting me with your base assumptions," Cinder said. "Really, are you still in highschool?"
"I suppose, in that case, you won't care that I've already given them the information to find your partner and have him taken out as soon as it's convenient to do so," Watts said slyly.
This got the reaction he wanted.
Cinder slammed him into the the wall and pulled a glass knife out and put it to his throat.
"Why would you do that?" she asked, through gritted teeth. "Just to get to me? Or because you knew it was safer that way? Coward. Did you think that would save you?"
"Do calm down," Watts said, not bothered at all. "I was lying."
Cinder frowned. "Why should I think that's not a lie also?"
"Besides, Cinder, if I really had done that, I assure you he'd already be dead. He's not exactly a cautious kind of fellow, is he?"
That did seem like a good point.
"But I assure you, he is a target for them," Watts said. "I believe the only reason he's lived so long is that their odd Grimm weapons do not seem to do much to him, and he's too close to Raven for his assassination not to get them in trouble. He shouldn't be going out there on the field if he wants to live till his next birthday. You're a sinking ship."
[Hey! Don't call my ship that!]
Cinder dropped him. "You just wanted to see what I would do," she realized, disgusted.
"And you did exactly what I was hoping for," Watts said. "Though I confess, I am surprised. I've never seen you get so worked up over anyone but yourself... As for them knowing where he is, it's to be assumed, if they had spies in Argus, they already know that. You still fall into traps so easily."
"You are insufferable." Cinder had no better retort.
"And you are oblivious as always," Watts said. "Your partnership with him is bound to raise questions. They already know about those other old friends of yous. You're still selfish enough to bring other people into it. But I wonder if that may haunt you after all. Perhaps you've never been able to write off the blood on your hands as well as the rest of us."
"What do you want, Arthur?" Cinder shot back, turning her back on him also. "I know you want something. I couldn't care less what it is, but in the interest of ending this conversation as soon as possible, why don't you just tell me?"
"Simple," Watts said. "I want you to suffer as much humiliation as you've put me through. More, even. Even if you kill me, in the end I know I've won. You were never as good at making allies as enemies, after all. There'll be more after me and the tribe, even if you survive them. Do you think anyone will forget your sins? Even if your foolish friends pretend they didn't happen, the world won't let it go. You will always be running. In that way, I've already succeeded. But it does make it more fun to bait the hook for them anyway. And if it's possible you have started to have some warped affection for these people, it's even better if they go down with you. But really, what person have you ever known who you haven't pulled down in the end? I always said it--you were a snare to any side you worked on."
This was more effective because Cinder was already shaken up from before.
"Shut up," she said more weakly.
"Very well, I've had my fun." Watts didn't need to keep this up to enjoy her discomfort. "As for how to find the tribe, I suggest you try the method Victoria has come up with. The last I heard from them, they were planning to use this Menagerie trick to gain power over the trade in that area. Now that it's failed, they'll be planning a comeback. It takes time to gather those Grimm and make them into the devilish forms they use. They need victims for it too, nasty business. I suppose they'll be anxious to capture more. Good luck with that."
Cinder moved to the door and then turned back.
"Arthur," she said, in a calmer voice, but it was sharp-edged too, "you can be sure that whether it's me, or whether it's them, or whether it's your own doing, you will die, and your soul will go straight to hell, along with all of theirs, where you can have all the fun of thinking about how you spent your entire life striving after things that would all be gone once you lost it anyway. Maybe you should ask yourself if this petty victory is going to seem like much consolation then."
Watts looked uneasy again finally.
Cinder slammed the door on him.
The others had been in the hallway. They hadn't heard most of it through the thick walls of Shade's rooms, but they had listened for any sign of distress.
"Did you get anything?" Theo asked.
"Not much we can use," Cinder said. "Seems he really doesn't know how to find them, but he thinks they'll need more victims for their...despicable practices."
"Are you okay?" Oscar noticed the odd look in her eyes. "Did he say something to you?"
"I just can't stand him," Cinder lied. "That's all. You know he always makes me furious."
Oscar didn't think she looked only furious, but he wasn't sure what to ask about it.
"If that's all, then this was a waste of time," Theo said.
Cinder just walked away.
"I guess she can't handle the failure," Theo said. "Better lock him back up."
Royal and Oscar exchanged a look.
"So we both know that Watts must have done something else," Royal said.
"Yeah," Oscar said. "Maybe he just got under her skin."
Royal frowned, and then he followed Theo.
Theo was just picking Watts up when Royal slugged him into the floor.
Theo didn't even stop him, he just stood there.
Watts coughed from the impact.
"What did you say?" Royal demanded.
Oscar came in, but he didn't stop him either--he just frowned at Watts.
"Nothing much," Watts said. "We just had a talk about how the odds are not in all of yours favor. I guess it upset her to know she'll always lose in the end."
"You sick, twisted--" Royal threw out some very unrefined words again.
"Watts, I just don't get it," Oscar said, somberly. "Why do you hate her so much? Aside from that one time, she'd never even gone out of her way to hurt you except when you incited it. Why do you need to hurt her so badly?"
"She's always been a migraine to work with," Watts said, as Theo yanked him back to his feet roughly.
"That doesn't seem right," Oscar said. "You could tolerate Tyrian but not her? Why? Is it that, deep down, you knew she was better than you?"
"Better than me? That minx?" Watts said.
"At least she could change," Oscar said.
"To tell you the truth, Pine, I really don't care about the ethics of someone," Watts said, which wasn't quite true. "Cinder was a stuck up little waif from the moment she joined us. I never could understand why Hazel recruited her at all. He always did have a soft spot for mouthy little brats. Especially girls. Not that she ever was grateful to him. She never had much but some basic fighting talent to contribute, and she treated us all as if she was better than us because of her agenda against Atlas. As if that was special. I suppose it just grates on my nerves... And then later she couldn't even do anything right. Some people would learn their place, but she never has. Even now."
"What a stupid reason to hate someone," Royal said matter-of-factly.
So much so that Watts almost looked a little miffed by it.
"You have to be pretty insecure for that to bother you so much," Royal added.
"To be fair, she does act pretty superior to everyone," Theo said.
"I don't really notice it now," Oscar said. "And it's not reason to treat her like she's less than human." With another look at Theo.
"She couldn't even be impressive when she was less than human," Watts said. "Why you all went to so much effort to spare her and put her back together is beyond me."
"Is that it?" Oscar suddenly understood. "Not just that she tried to change, but that we helped her and healed her and accepted her, and you were just tricked? You're jealous? You think that if we picked any of you villains, you should have been our first choice."
Watts' expression shifted, as if Oscar had hit upon it.
"Just like in The Four Loves," Oscar muttered. "The people are jealous of the others being chosen, when they think they're smarter or wiser than them."
He looked up and chuckled. "But that's silly, Arthur. The word says that God has hidden things from the wise and given them to the simple. And that if you think you are wise, then you know nothing. Foolish things confound the wise, and God's wisdom is foolishness to man. I think Shine even told you that a long time ago. You still don't get it, do you? You might be smarter, maybe, and maybe, by the world's standard, you're worth more than Cinder to us. But maybe that's exactly why she was chosen. God likes to choose the people who don't make any sense so that we see it's not up to us and our deeds. You're a cold-hearted man who's brilliant, and no one can argue that you're talented...but God is not impressed by talent. He gave it to us, and He can take it away. Do you think he's going to think you're worthy just because you use the gifts He gave you to do as you please, and not as would please Him? You think your independence from Him is going to strike him as impressive? Please. If He needed anything, He wouldn't ask you for it. He doesn't need any of us to do things for Him--He gives us the honor of it because He likes us. Cinder knew from the start that she would never please a good God by her actions or her abilities, so she just accepted that she would have to obey Him instead. In doing that, maybe she became more worthy than you. Salem herself saw the light. If you didn't, do you really think it's because we're the ones who don't get it? You didn't have a Grimm part, or a curse, or a crappy childhood, at least that I know of, to make you not understand the truth--you just think you're smarter than it. I don't think it's our fault if that meant we couldn't accept you as better than us."
He shrugged. "We're all messes, in our own way. But you don't get that you are. That's the reason you can't be one of the chosen. I really hope someday that changes for you, because it's kind of just sad if it doesn't, but that was Tyrian's mistake. He never could see why he was wrong...and he killed himself because of that. I see now that it really is surprising that some people like being happy and like being saved, and others really just don't."
"Hear hear," Royal agreed with him.
Theo looked a little bemused.
"When you put it that way, Oscar," he said, "I think I see why you think we're being asses. I guess Fall is a headcase, but maybe in the end that's not the real point. We think we're so smart ,and we nearly got ourselves destroyed once and for all by those gods. Maybe you're right... We should let it go."
"Theo, that's...the most I've ever understood anything you've said," Oscar said.
"I don't even have the heart to hit him now," Royal said, glancing at Watts. "Now I just feel sorry for him. He's never going to understand what it's like to love anybody, to be loved by them, because he has to weigh and balance them all. He's a weasel, but he's a sad one. What's the use of being angry?"
He walked out.
Oscar shook his head and walked out too.
[Ouch, Watts will be nursing that wound for a while.]
* * *
Cinder had gone out to the wall on Shade and called Raven.
"You want me to revoke your partnership?" Raven repeated. "Why? I would say after the last month we've had, you need all the help you can get."
"Just do it," Cinder said.
"No, I'm not going to without good reasons. We've had this conversation before, and you agreed to keep working with them, I thought," Raven said. "Why the sudden change?"
Cinder frowned at her. "I can't work with him anymore."
Raven looked at her narrowly. "What happened?" she asked.
"Watts...confirmed that we're both targets." Cinder risked some of the truth. "I can't--it's too predictable."
"It may be," Raven said. "But together you're solid and have managed to evade them. None of us are safe. Why does it matter? It won't exactly be better if you're separated."
"In that case, I'm not doing this anymore," Cinder said. "There's no point."
Raven was stunned. "You're that serious?"
Cinder narrowed her eyes at her.
"Fine," Raven said. "I think this is a mistake...but we need all the help we can get. I suppose you can work with other people if it would make that much of a difference. But I think you're overreacting and this is probably what Watts wanted. So once you come to your senses, let me know and I'll revoke this decision." She hung up.
Her lack of confidence in Cinder's clear thinking was not unfounded, but it wasn't swaying Cinder's mind.
"What was that about?" Vara startled her by springing onto the wall.
Cinder nearly dropped her scroll. "What were you doing there?"
"You're sloppy." Vara slid onto the parapet. "A better huntress would have sensed I was coming. I can climb walls like this--there's enough holes in it. It's nothing, with my sense of space."
She moved over the wall as nimbly as a cat.
"A pregnant woman should be less reckless," Cinder said.
"I could easily land if I fell from here," Vara said. "In case you had any ideas."
Cinder wasn't in the mood for messed up jokes.
She ignored her.
"So why did you tell Raven to switch things up?" Vara asked. "Just because Watts said something about it?"
"You shouldn't be eavesdropping."
"This is my school--of course I should. How else would I ever find out what the kids are up to when they should be studying?" Vara leaned on the wall lazily. "I never thought you'd ever care about anyone else's safety but your own."
"Shut up." Cinder moved away from her again, but Vara followed.
"I thought there was something up," she said. "But now I'm sure of it. I can't believe what I'm seeing. You're in love with that guy, aren't you?"
"What?!" Cinder way overreacted if she was going to play it off like Vara was wrong. "Don't be preposterous."
"That was so confining," Vara said sarcastically. "I'm affronted you can't even try to lie to me better than that, really."
"I'm just appalled at how asinine that was," Cinder said.
"Oh, don't even try." Vara waved her hand. "You're as bad as Winter was... Hmm." She studied Cinder's expression. "But I guess a cold-hearted b---h like you won't know if it happened. For a Mistralian, you sure can act like an Atlesian."
"Enough of this." Cinder backed up from her. "And I would never be anything like that. I don't even know what that means. And I never felt that way about anyone."
"Then how do you know you aren't?" Vara countered.
Cinder fumbled for a reason and found none other than, "Because that's not me."
"Well, it's a little different for everyone," Vara said. "Some people are all cute about it and feel butterflies and rainbows and that kind of nonsense. Not me, though."
"I don't want to hear about you."
"I didn't think I loved Theo." Vara ignored her. "I just figured I was lonely, you know... I thought he was too much of a jackass for me to feel that way. He just got on my nerves all the time...but then I started to realize I would rather he be getting on my nerves and be there, than I be getting along with anyone else. I guess that's odd, but it's beautiful, to me, in it's own odd way."
"I said I don't want to hear it." Cinder didn't like how familiar it sounded.
"I know what your problem is," Vara said. "You think that you're too off in the head...but you know, crazy people still have feelings. It's not unheard of. And you think you're too mean for that kind of thing to happen. I used to think that too. Didn't work for me that way. In fact, I think it just makes it worse. Once someone gets under your guard, it's hard to get them back out. You're too unaccustomed to it. I bet that's just what's happened to you. You started off hating it, but now you can't shake it, is that right?"
"Not in the least," Cinder said, but she didn't sound very convincing even to herself.
But Vara had to be wrong.
"Besides," she went on aloud, "that state of mind is a delusion...and even if it was real, I don't have any sign of it. I'm just thinking of what's smartest."
"Is that so?" Vara said. "Well, if that's true, I'm way off. And I suppose all the blushing and getting flustered is just because you feel stupid?"
Cinder glared at her.
"You don't even know what you feel, do you?" Vara said. "You're so out of touch with your own emotions...which is nothing new--you always have been. One reason I never liked you. You always acted like you were so tough when you were just scared. I like honesty. Frankly, you're getting on my nerves even now, but at least this is more entertaining."
"You are truly Theo's wife," Cinder said testily.
"Thank you,." Vara smiled. "Well, I suppose I see why you'd be in denial. That guy would be nuts to want to be with you. I guess he's not interested anyway."
Cinder made a scoffing noise, before she realized how foolish it was to do so.
"Or he is..." Vara had known this already. "I see... Did he tell you that?"
"No."
"Liar." Vara tugged her hair. "It's written all over your face. I bet that you shot it down, too. That's just too funny." She snickered to herself. "All that about being powerful and being worthy, and in the end you don't feel worthy or powerful. A little thing like this and you're all off balance."
"Shut up!" Cinder grew angrier.
"You shut up," Vara shot back at her, which caught her off guard. "You make me sick. You're afraid to be alive, to embrace the human experience, just because you know it would be hard to control. Are you really protecting that guy by trying to put some distance in, or are you protecting yourself?"
"Aside from how untrue all this is," Cinder said thinly, "there are real dangers out there to think about."
"Cinder--" Vara grabbed her arm, not very gently, and spun her to face the skyline. "This world is full of dangers. Do you really think the bandits are the end of it? Most of us put ourselves in danger every day. Accidents happen...and things that are not accidents. You would know, you've caused plenty of them. I agree with you that you don't really deserve a second chance...but you've got one anyway. You were a monster...and now, whatever you are, you've started to act human for the first time since I've known you. While it does make me a little nauseous, it also makes me wonder if we were wrong to think everyone could be so simple. Do you think it's safer to push people away? Maybe it is, for you. But if someone really, really loves you, it won't work. You could be standing in a vault, ready to impale yourself, and they'll follow you in and pull a grenade and say 'if you go, I go.'"
"What?" Cinder was baffled by that. "Was that based on a real event?"
"Did no one ever tell you that story?" Vara said carelessly. "Huh...also that's why Pyrrha never got the Maiden powers from me."
"Are you serious?" Cinder almost forgot the thing they were talking about, she was so weirded out. "Theodore threatened to... What kind of insane b-----d would do that?!"
"I know, right?" Vara said. "But after that, I guessed I was stuck with him. Look--" She got more serious. "--I know you think we're crazy--and we are. But we went through hell and back again with each other, and we drive each other up the wall, but I can't do this life thing without him, and I think he'd say the same. That's all it is, in the end. If that's the way it is, you can't really change it. Maybe you can deny yourself that, but you can't change what happened. I don't think it works that way. So do what you want. I don't really care about you enough to stop you... But to me, it insults the whole point of what we went through this all for, what we risked our lives for, and fought the gods and suffered the pain and humiliation... If it wasn't so that we could have the dignity of at least living out our lives with the people who did care about us and want our best, then why did we do it? If you wanted freedom without meaning or worth to anyone, I don't think you wanted freedom. That's my two lien...and I'm done talking about this."
She sprang back up on the wall. "Enjoy your trip back to Argus."
She ran along the wall--and then in the door to the school, so at least she didn't jump the rest of the way down.
Cinder glared after her and then sighed and leaned on the wall.
The sun was nearly set, and the stars were out, just one line of light along the horizon right now. The desert always looked the most lonely when it was between day and night.
It struck Cinder as kind of poetic. Just like she herself was always between darkness and light, not really sure she was going to commit to either. And not sure if what she did was selfish or unselfish.
Maybe she was utterly oblivious to that...but even so, she didn't intend to change her mind. Vara didn't know what she was talking about, and Raven was getting way too optimistic in her later years to see that the people they were fighting were just not going to stop till they had what they wanted, or they were forced to stop.
[Imagine Dragons--"Amsterdam"]