Indhrajith's Pov
I couldn't believe that I'm sleeping holding this orphan tightly.
I tried to sleep but I couldn't... My sleeping pills, her shawl, they didn't help me. I wanted her warmth. I had a great control of my feelings and emotions but after I started hugging her to sleep. My body, my mind everything longed for her warmth.
After I successfully failed to control the urge to hug her to sleep. I went to room without getting caught by my parents.
I slowly opened her room door and went inside. She is sleeping curling herself into a ball. I closed the door and went to her. I wanted to back away from my sudden plan but I couldn't.
She covered herself completely with the quilt and she was sleeping soundly. She really looked like an innocent baby now but I couldn't agree with it. I gently touched her forehead and she is burning with fever even now. I didn't bother about it and got into the quilt with her. I pulled her in my embrace earning a mmm from her. I hugged her, she rested her head on my chest and continued sleeping. I lowered my face and buried in her neck and closed my eyes. I was welcomed by a good and peaceful sleep.
When I woke up she was sleeping soundly.... I looked at her face blankly for a few seconds and I left the room....
I locked my room and stood infront of the photo of Nithya..... I stared at it for sometime.
I closed my eyes and recalled the way she used to call me maamu...
No one can replace you even that orphan.......
I left to the office even without having breakfast. I kept myself busy. If I'm free from work, my devil mind will make use of it.
My phone pinged.... I took it and had a look at the notification. It notified about my appointment with my Psychiatrist. After Nithya left me, I completely lost my mind and I really needed a support to overcome that and this is the one I chose.
I completed my work early and headed for my psychiatric consultation....
I waited for my turn and when I called in, I went in.
Hello Indrajith...... Chandru the psychiatrist wished me.
Hi Chandru.. How are you .... I asked him. We have become good friends in these days.
I have to ask you this question.... And yeah I'm good and how are you, how's everything going.... He asked.
Mmm going good.... I responded...
Ok are you following my Instructions.... Are you seeing any changes?... He asked.
Yes I'm following your instructions.... I lied glibly.
And about the improvement.... I'm sleeping well without sleeping pills..... I said. When I said that her face flashed in my mind.
That's a very great improvement..... Look Indrajith... Sleep has the power to cure many stress issues, mental issues and you are sleeping well these days seems like your condition improving a lot....... He said.
I guess so..... I replied.
After a normal checkup. I completed my session.
And remember this Indrajith..... Love is a powerful weapon, it has the power to create as well as destroy oneself... It is in our hand to choose the right now...... He concluded.
Ok Chandru, then I'll take my leave.... I said and came out of his cabin. I paid the bill and made my way to the office.
I remembered Chandru's Instruction.... He asked me to keep myself away from the things that remind me of Nithya....but how can I do that..... How can I forget her... It's impossible for me to do that...
I connected my phone to the car bluetooth and played my Nithya's voice note...
I smiled hearing her voice. My grip of the steering tightened when the reality hit me hard that I can never hear her voice in real....
I reached my office and did my work and I almost spend my whole day in the office. When I returned home it was 9.45 pm. My amma and appa was there in the hall chatting after their dinner.
Ennada ivlo late ah vara.... Amma asked.
Vela irunduchu.... I said.
Sapadu eduthu vaikava.... She asked.
Venam.... Pasikala.... I said and avoided dinner.
Konjamachum Magizh pathi kekurana paaru.... I heard appa saying this.
I was already stressing myself with various words and his words infuriated me more...
I turned to him and asked.... Yen andha anadhaya pathi ketuthaan aaganuma.... Uyiroda thane iruka sethupogalala aprom enna...
Dei.... Appa got from the couch and neared me with his hand raised to slap me.
Krishna... Stop it.... Amma stopped him.
Epdi pesuran paaru.... He asked.
Indrajith nee room ku po.... Amma asked me to leave.
Naa yen poganum. Unga husband edo pesanum nu nenaikuraru pesatum.... I said.
Indrajith... Please understand.. Just go to your room..... She pleaded..
I couldn't stand there after seeing her pleading so I went to my room.
I locked my room and sat on the bed. I punched my fist on the bed in anger.
It was all good. Indha anadha vandu en life ah problematic and complicate aakita... Nonsense...... I growled in anger.
I went to take a shower to cool myself down.....
After that as usual... I narrated about my whole day to my Nithya.... Eventhough I want her to respond but..... Ok let's forget that.
I went to the balcony to smoke..... After I got relaxed. I went to bed hoping to get some sleep...
Magizhini's Pov
I was in deep sleep when I was pulled into a strong embrace and the cigarette smell which hit my nose made me scrunch my face.
I opened my eyes and looked at him.... My Inder.... His eyes met mine but I couldn't keep my eyes open due to the effect of the tablet I had so I closed my eyes immediately.
I felt him burning his face in my neck and hugging me to sleep. I small smile formed on my lips...
Even this morning I started my day seeing his face.... I felt happy that moment.... I closed my eyes and continued my sleep when I woke up again he wasn't beside me and I'm seeing him now.... Although he gets angry on me still he cares for me too otherwise he won't be next to me now...
I put my thoughts aside and hugged him even more tightly and dozed off...
When I woke up he wasn't there. I touched the space beside and it was cold.
Seekram endrichu poitara.... I thought and my day went just like that. I'm getting better and the bruises on my body are fading away. I expected to see him atleast once but he didn't come to meet me.
When I asked Vaanathi ma about him she said he has already left to the office...
The day came to an end and I had tablets and lied on my bed. I started waiting for him to come to my room. When I heard my room door opening I pretended like I'm asleep.
He lied beside me and hugged me tightly.... I tried to get out of his hold when I realized he is drunk...
Summa amaidhiya iru di.... He said and hugged me tightly causing me little pain.
I was feeling uncomfortable..... I started to wriggle...
I miss you Nithya.... He whispered and hugged me tightly..... I stopped moving when I heard that...
Nithya..... I couldn't think about anything further... Is he thinking of me as Nithya.....
That thought didn't let me close my eyes but the tablets I had did it's work effectively and made me sleep....
When I woke up again he was not beside me... Vaanathi ma entered my room breaking my thoughts and dragging my attention to her.
Magizh ippo fever iruka... Epdi feel panra..... She asked and touched my forehead with the back of her palm..
Ippo fever illa.... She said with a smile.
I'm feeling good ma.... I replied.
Ok appo nee inaiku warm water la kuzhichiru you will feel fresh.... She said.
Sari maa.... Avar enga.... I asked.
She sighed and said..... Office poitan.
Oh......appo sari naa kuzhichitu varen...... I said and got out of the bed.
Ok Magizh.... She said and left the room. I took a long shower in warm water which completely made me feel fresh and relaxed.
I changed into a comfortable cloth and went downstairs after a whole two days. Yeah you heard it right, I didn't step out of my room for two days...
I had my breakfast and Vaanathi ma didn't let me in that kitchen that day. I sat in the dining hall and chatted with her.
When she went to rest after lunch. I went to my room.....thoughts of him occupied my mind.... The thoughts from the day we consummated till last night made me completely restless..
Nithya anaiku sonnaru ok teriyama solirukalam but nethum sonnaru... So what does that mean... Is he imagining her in my place or I'm I over thinking.....
I can't be relaxed till I clarify this...
I waited for him to come home. I just got to know he is being late to home for the past two days....
I waited for him.... And when he arrived, I was in the hall chatting with Vaanathi ma and Krishna mama. He passed me a look and went to his room.
Maa poi edachum venuma ketutu varen..... I rushed behind him without even waiting for their response...
I knocked on the door and went in. I saw him sitting on the bed.
Konjam pes.... He didn't even let me speak.
Pasikudu sapadu edutu vai.... He said.
Huh ok .... I rushed to kitchen and set everything on the dining table for him.
He came to the dining hall after taking a shower, the water droplets are dripping from his hair....
He sat on the chair and looked at me. I understood what he meant by looking at me.
I served him food and waited for him to complete his food so that I can speak to him.
He completed his food and went to wash his hands. I took the plate and went to wash it when I returned he wasn't there and the glass in which I poured water for him was kept there empty.
Room ku poitara..... I thought. I went to his room. All the way I was fidgeting with my fingers in nervous.
Pesiruviya Magizh illa bayathula marubadiyum kaaichal varuma..... My mind asked.
I knocked on the door and waited for his response.
Come in.... I heard him. I went inside and locked the door. He was no there maybe he is in the balcony. So I went there. He was smoking and the water droplets from his hair were dripping even now.....
As if he felt my presence he said.... Andha towel eduthutu vaa..
Nammazha pesa vida matara..but I really want to ask it. I can't live as someone's replacement...... I said to myself.
I took the towel he has thrown on the bed. I went to the balcony now he is sitting on the white swing there.
I went to him with the towel and handed it to him.
Dry my hair..... He said. I blinked a few times unable to grasp what he said.
He looked at me and raised his left eyebrow.
Enna.....I asked.
Dry my hair... He said gritted his teeth. I moved closer to him. He put off the cigarette and sit straight. I put the towel on his head and started drying his hair.
I was drying his hair when he pulled me on his lap. I gasped loudly by the sudden move of him and his face was too close to mine. When I tried to get up his grip on my waist tighten.
Are you OK to have physical relationship because I badly need it now..... He asked blatantly.
Ugh... I was disgusted by the way he asked. When he didn't get any response from me.
I asked you something dammit.... He growled.
Illa.... Ippo thaan fever pochu.... I said.
Fever pochu thane aprom ennadi.... He asked.
Tears formed in my eyes remembering that painful night.
Bayama iruku...... I said and lowered my head, my lips quivered in fear.
Inga paaru... He said and lifted my face.
I looked at him.
I won't be harsh.... I promise..... He said in an unusually soft tone.
Magizh venam nu sollu venam nu sollu....... My mind advised me.
Nijama...... The inner child inside me asked him without hearing the words of my conscience.
He smiled joining our foreheads... I blinked rapidly when he scooped me in his arms, I circled my hands around his neck for grip.
He lied me on the bed and turned of the lights....
He kissed me directly on the lips and started removing my clothes. Before I could prepare myself he moved to the other things Making me blush, squirm and more...
As he promised he didn't hurt me.... He exploded inside me and lied on the bed beside me. I expected a kiss on forehead but he lied on top of me and buried his face between my chest and closed his eyes.
I ran my fingers through his hair...... I closed my eyes that's when I heard him saying.... "I miss you Nithya".
My body stiffened hearing that.... I tried to push him but his grip was too tight for me to remove. Tears left my eyes....
But he slept peacefully ruining my sleep.... I was awake till 4 am then I gradually dozed off due to tiredness.
But that sleep only lasted for 2 hours. I opened my eyes slowly and saw him who is still lying on top of me.
I tried to move him. He groaned and opened his eyes...
When his eyes landed on me. He started yelling at me...
Yeiii saniyane unna naa muzhikum bodu en room la iruka koodathunu soliruken la aprom eduku di inga iruka..... He yelled.
My eyes welled up with tears... I couldn't react my mind didn't work for few seconds.
Pesite iruken pathutu iruka. Get out... He pulled me out of the bed not caring about my condition. I clenched the sheets to my chest cover myself. I looked at him in disbelief, confused and scared.
He looked at my condition and asked .....Ippove Dress potutu vezhiya poriya illa ipdiye vezhiya thazhi vidatuma....
I gasped loudly in fear.
He neared me... I immediately picked the clothes from the floor and looked at him.
Change it and get out you bitch...... He yelled and turned to the other side. I quickly wore my clothes.
He turned to me and had a glance of me.
Naa pes... He didn't even let me speak. He dragged me to the door and pushed me out.
He slammed the door right on my face. I was puzzled about what happened now.
Magizh... Ennachu unaku..... Vaanathi ma neared me and loooked at me.
I didn't like to be like this infront of anyone.
Naa kuzhichitu varen maa.... I said and went to my room. I locked myself and slid down the door and started thinking about everything that happened since I woke up.
When I comprehended everything... I cupped my mouth and cried.....
What is happening to me? why he is behaving like this?
Enaku eduvum purila kadavule.... En life enna nadakudunu purila......
I hugged my knees and cried thinking about my pathetic condition......
Hi makkazhe
Hope you like this chapter..... Chapter epdi irukunu sollunga.
Seerkam santhippom.
Marakama vote panunga ❤️.