I drove to Leah’s and knocked on her door. She opened it pretty quickly, she smiled and said “still with the knocking”
“It feels weird to just walk in though” I said while walking through to the living room. I sat on the sofa, Leah looked at me and said “do you fancy a beer, I could do with one”
I said “I do but I’m driving”
She said “you could stay if you want to or get an Uber home if you don’t feel comfortable staying”
“I’ll have a beer and I’ll stay” I said
Her face lit up when I said that, made my heart skip a beat. She went and got the beers and came and sat next to me on the sofa. She handed me one of the beers and I said “thanks” I took a sip of my beer. I put it on the table. Then I turned to Leah and said “are you ok?”
“Things have been better I’m not going to lie but I’m sure that I will get through it. I have my friends around me” she said
“Of course, you do. We will always be here for you” I said
She said “Lia spoke to me. She told me that she still loved Caitlin and that you told her that she couldn’t string me along”
I said “yeah, she spoke to me after the Everton game. I didn’t think that it was fair on you”
She said “nothing was really happening though but I’m happy you were looking out for me”
“I always will Le, no matter what” I said
“Beth told me that you and her split up” Leah said
“Yeah, we did. I told you the other day that it was going to happen” I said
“How are you doing with it?” She asked
“I’m ok. Just got to find somewhere to live. Beth hasn’t been home much so it helps that it hasn’t been awkward” I said
“You could always come back here if you wanted to” Leah said
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea” I said
She asked “why?”
“It’s complicated” I said
“Why is it? We are friends, aren’t we?” she asked
“We are but tell me you only have friendly feelings for me” I said
She said “I can’t. My feelings for you never went away”
“That’s why it’s not a good idea” I said
She said “can I ask you something?”
I said “yeah of course”
“When you told me that you and Beth were going to break up you said that you weren’t fully in it. Why wasn’t you?” she asked
“Because I still have feelings for you. Another reason why I can’t move back in” I said
She looked surprised and said “really?”
“Yeah really” I said
“Will there ever be a way back for us?” Leah asked
“I hope so. I just need you to be patient with me. I need some time to figure myself out again. I don’t know when it happened but I kind of lost myself” I said
We went on to talk about what rehab holds for her and of course the world cup. I wasn’t a dead certain for the team but I’ve been in the squad that it is likely that I will be picked for the world cup squad.
We watched a movie and then we both went to bed in separate rooms.
I lay in bed that night thinking that maybe I could get my Leah back. I need to find a way to trust her after what she did and I do need to work on myself. I know that she is my home.