"There is no terror after the bang of the gun; only the anticipation in it." —Alfred Hitchcock.
~
Porsche?" Mile called out. He knocked a couple times, but there was no answer, so he slowly opened the door and entered the room. He stood there, completely shocked by the scene unfolding before his eyes. Porsche moves away from Tawan. With a heavy sigh, he ran his hand through his hair in frustration. Tawan winces as he stands up from the floor, his hand instinctively reaching for his neck. He takes a few deep breaths before abruptly running out of the room. Porsche's gaze drifted upward to the ceiling as he tried to suppress his emotions.
"Why are you here? No....How did you know I'm here?....Are you stalking me now?" Porsche yelled, his voice rising an octave. He is feeling extremely annoyed by Mile's presence at this moment. It's even worse that the man always runs into him at the worst possible times. "GET OUT!"
"I said get out!" Porsche looked him straight in the eyes and yelled again with even more force.
Mile was taken aback for a moment, needing a few seconds to gather his thoughts. "Porsche," Mile's voice was soft as a whisper when he called out. He can see Porsche's eyes were brimming with tears, threatening to spill over.
"I said....," Porsche's words caught in his throat when his voice broke down. Running towards him, Mile wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug. Porsche was unable to hold back the tears that streamed down his face. Mile held onto him, offering a safe space for him to release all the emotions he had been bottling up inside.
***
Kinn had just left in the morning when Mile called him to say hi. As soon as Porsche's hoarse voice reached his ears, he was filled with worry. Porsche reassured him that he was perfectly fine, but Mile remained unconvinced. He warned him that if he didn't see a doctor now, he would have no choice but to take him there himself. Knowing Porsche didn't look well the last few times he saw him, hearing his weak voice, really worried him. Porsche didn't want to cause the man any distress, so he assured him that he was currently receiving care at the hospital. Mile's care for him is genuine, and he knows it. When Mile said he was coming to visit, Porsche declined and said it wasn't necessary.
At the rooftop garden of the hospital, Mile and Porsche sat in silence.
"I'm sorry," Porsche apologies, finally breaking the uncomfortable silence. He felt guilty for being harsh on him. "I didn't mean to...."
"Let's not say sorry or thank you to each other," Mile interrupted.
"I hurt him on purpose because I had been holding onto my anger for too long. I don't think I meant anything that I said to him. Actually, I was jealous of him," Porsche admits, glancing at his wedding band.
"My husband, Kinn, really loves him. He was his first love. They'll probably have a happy life together if they got married," Porsche's voice shook as he fought back tears.
"Why did he marry you then?" Mile asked.
"He had no choice but to marry me, which I only found out later. I walked right into a trap, and now I'm drowning and feeling suffocated," Porsche said with a melancholic tone. He takes out his wedding ring and twirls it around his finger.
"Porsche...." Mile starts,
"I know what you're gonna ask. You will never understand my reason,"
Mile could feel Porsche's pain as he watched the tears flow down his face. He knelt before him and gently wiped away his tears. "No matter what, I'm always on your side. I just want to see you happy," Mile's low voice trembled with sadness as he asked. As he looks at the man in front of him, he wonders how anyone could cause him pain. "Tell me.... why can't you leave him?"
Porsche's gaze remained fixed in the distance.
"You...You love him, don't you?" Mile said,
"I don't love him....he wasn't mine to love," Porsche sighed, closing his eyes.
Mile's gentle touch on Porsche's hands conveyed a sense of comfort and understanding as he held his hand. "You don't have to go through this alone. I'm here to listen when you're ready, and whenever you need someone to lean on, know that I'll be there for you,"
Mile knew there is more reason for Porsche staying married to the guy. Betrayal and cheating can cause irreparable damage to a marriage, making it difficult for even the strongest of loves to survive. He knew Porsche had been aware of the affair for quite some time. His expression at that restaurant when he saw Tawan and Kinn was evident; he was not shocked or angry, but rather filled with sadness. There must be extenuating circumstances that explain why he is still married to him, despite knowing all of this. He marvels at Porsche's love for his husband, even though he cannot fathom it. As of now, he only wishes to be there for him and put a smile on his face.
***
"Is he trying to kill himself or what?" Kinn said, looking over Porsche's schedule. The reason Porsche fell ill to the point of collapsing is now clear to him; he was working too hard. Kinn's heart ached with a sense of guilt as he questioned whether he was to blame. "What about the accident? Did you find anything?"
"Here..." Big said as he gave the iPad to Kinn to watch the video.
"It appears that Khun Porsche lost control and collided with a light pole. The only thing I found out was that there was a fire accident nearby," Big explained.
"Fire?" Kinn asked as he look over the video.
"Yes, a fire broke out in a building that was still under construction," Big replied. As it was quite a way from the accident site, he didn't consider it related to the Porsche crash. "Nothing out of the ordinary happened on the road that led to the accident. But I'm still looking into it. I will report back if I find more information,"
"Thank you. You can go now,"
After bowing in respect, Big left the room.
"What am I doing?" Kinn muttered under his breath.
His eyes dart towards his phone, which has been buzzing incessantly. It is Tawan. He has been constantly calling him the entire day. He pressed the side button, and the phone screen went dark as he flipped it over. While leaning on his chair and shutting his eyes, he heard a commotion outside. In a flash, Tawan burst into his office.
"Sorry, I try to stop him," Ken said
"It's okay," Kinn said.
Ken left the office and closed the door behind him.
"Why are you ignoring my calls?" Tawan yells. He's frustrated that Kinn has been ignoring his calls.
"Why are you here?" Kinn asked back, ignoring his question. He is not in the mood to argue with him right now.
"Your fucking whore husband did this to me," he pointed to his neck, revealing the red mark.
"Watch your word," Kinn warned.
Tawan's eyes widened, and he let out a gasp of surprise. Instead of showing concern, his boyfriend's reaction was to yell at him, leaving him in disbelief.
"You went to see my husband? You didn't do that, did you?" Kinn said. As far as he is aware, Porsche never knew about Tawan. "Please, tell me you didn't?"
"YOUR HUSBAND! Is that what matters to you? Not what happens to me? Not how he almost killed me?" Tawan clenched his fists, seething with anger. The fact that Kinn said 'my husband' hurt him more than what Porsche did.
"How did you know he was in hospital and why would you go see him? FOR WHAT!" Kinn's voice thundered with fury.
"FUCK YOU KINN, FUCK YOU! He knows about us. Isn't that what you are trying to hide from him? Since you don't have the balls to divorce his ass, I ask him to let you go. Because you are mine. Mine only!" Tawan's voice boomed as he yelled. Kinn's concern over Porsche discovering their secret left him feeling even more enraged. The combination of Porsche's humiliation and Kinn's reaction makes him to burst into tears.
"Hey...." Kinn moved towards him, but Tawan turn back and left the room.
Kinn closes his eyes, trying to make sense what happened.
"Porsche knew! Porsche knew all along!" Kinn muttered, his eyes wide with shock. He didn't even consider the events that occurred with Tawan, as his mind was consumed by the fact that Porsche had kept silent about being aware of the situation.
He picks his phone and dials Porsche, but the call goes straight to voicemail. He tries again, but it is still the same. He threw his phone in frustration, and the sound of it hitting the wall reverberated through the room.
***
"I think there is something going on in the main family," Vegas said, drying his hair with a towel. He and Tay just finished taking a shower. Well, they did more than taking shower.
"Why you think that?" Ask Tay as he sits on the edge of the bed.
"I don't know. I just feel that something is going to happen. It seems like Kim or his mother is plotting something,"
"Do you think its about Kinn?"
"Or Porsche," Vegas adds. Lately, he has been feeling like something is off, although he can't quite put his finger on what's going on. "I saw Rose having a meeting with a few board members and some unfamiliar faces lately. There must be something if she's meeting them without Korn,"
"Maybe you should tell kinn"
"Tell him what? I don't even know what's going on for sure," Vegas said, taking a sit next to Tay. "Enough about other people's business. I'm ready for another round," Vegas pulled Tay onto his lap and kissed him deeply, savoring the taste of his lips.
***
Porsche and Mile headed back to the Porsche room as the night set in. They walked into the hallway, laughing and joking with each other. Whenever Mile tells one of his classic dad jokes, he never fails to make him smile. Porsche's smile was contagious, and Mile found himself grinning from ear to ear.
"Who are you?" Kinn's eyes were fixed on Mile. He couldn't help but feel a sense of dislike towards the man standing next to his husband.
Porsche's hand squeezes Mile's before he can even get a word out. Kinn's eyes caught the way Porsche was holding his hand, and it made him feel uneasy
Mile Understood Porsche's unspoken words. He put on a fake smile and said, "I'm Mile. You are?"
"His husband, Kinn!" he said, pulling Porsche to his side.