After a long deep and mind blowing lecture of Toto I was finally free, I swear to god I was in his office a more than just a hour. He kept me within those four walls analysing every little offense of mine, from past, present and also future. Fury occupied within his words. Each one of it aimed to crash my ego, my way of thinking.
I sigh the minute I heard him release me from this torture letting me leave his office and finally head to my car. The bodyguards have left with Bianca and Diana after my approval, I didn't need them anyway.
It was a short distance from the paddock, to formula one parking lot and to my apartment here in Singapore, and I have had a long ass day, I wasn't in for any more unexpected drama.
Yet, you can never relax in my life, you can never have plans in my life. A normal day is a day without colour, I loved colour. Therefore before I could react I felt a crashing pain to my back. My body crashed back against my car. I growled from the collision and in an instant my eyes widened with the scaring of vanilla blueberry scent filling my nostrils unpleasantly.
This icy stare reminded me a lot of my past, of my demons since one of them was standing right in front of me, glaring at me with his fierce flaming eyes, gleaming green against my serious bright blue ones.
"What's wron-"
"What games are you playing with Charles my teammate?" His voice tense, enchanted with hatred along with envy.
A certain aggressiveness expressed, he definitely didn't seem to like our little relationship. And I definitely don't have a clue of the reason behind it. Was it my happiness that intrigued his emotions? It can't be, I was nothing but joyful today.
"I don't know what you are talking about." My face remained composed sealed from seriousness, as I stand tall showing off my indifference. Charles and I indeed shared a special connection,m. He was the man that was there, in my worst and best.. I will never forget how he contributed to my sorrow after moving away from Brazil.
Sadness threatened to overpass the surface, shoving it back down I reclaimed my cold attitude.
"Oh so now you have no idea?" His voice deep and shallow, infuriated raising his voice at me. His gaze dropped to my lips, biting his own to maintain his anger, he had me all wrapped around his finger and I was so in for it. Driving my eyes exactly where he wanted them to be. And he wanted the attention all for himself. "You know, I have no clue why they let you both get away with it so easily in the first place since it was pretty unfair for the rest of us."
"Well, look here.. You are not the one to say what's unfair or not, are you?" I say, drawn back by his extreme audacity reminding myself the several occasions he has been unfair to me, including this one.
"Is this what really bothers you? I'm sure you are just mad you had the pleasure to embrace me, to touch me in any way." My eyes sharpened and his stare became heavy, his breath fell into my skin, sending chills down my spine.
A sneer escalates his mouth, a real laugh.
"If I wanted I would have done much worse things than just a hug." He itched closer and closer, leaning in letting his hands fall next to my head imprisoning me there in great danger.
"Like what?" I whispered sweetly. A light tone combined with raspy breaths.
By each stare he gave me was dipped in mischief and darkness, it caused a twist to my stomach. A weird sensation I've never been occupied with before.
He leaned closer, the tension crawled back louder this time, as his breaths conflicted onto my skin, I trembled, trembled and frozen right in the spot in the sense of his hot breath streaming against my lips.
"Like burring myself deep inside your helpless wet pussy." He said. Raspy low tone sliding his finger across my thighs. "And fuck you. Hard, rough, until you can't take it anymore, until you plead me to stop."he rubbed his finger sensually closer to my inner thighs pressing his thumb as he squeezes me.
I felt my legs clench closed hiding in fact how wet he got me. How something within me has twisted to something totally different, hatred did crawl to my emotions but it was combined with something new and scary.
Those dirty words twisted something inside of me, occupying my brain with imaginations, it was a trick, a trick which I fell at the moment I imagined how it would feel, how it would taste such event. And suddenly all the air had disappeared as he was so close to me and my sensitive spots.
"Believe me I have just the prefect companion for that." I say courteous, exhaling a deep breath which I apparently was holding. Fuck, it was so intimidating, more than just a usual fight.
Iur eyes constantly on each other and his touch remained, on my inner thigh making me clench my legs harder.
"Oh really?" His head tilts in the lack of consideration, squeezing me harder. "Do you have a diversity amount of companion for everything you do in your daily time?"
A short unmeasured breath escalated my mouth.
"You know my composed Italian side tells me to keep level and ignore you. However my Brazilian side is totally keen on the idea of smacking your ass and feeding you worms while I have successfully drown you in the deepest ocean."I utter, relaxed whilst my body sticks on the car keeping myself as much distant as possible.
"Did it took you long enough to memorize all this things or you just like to think about me in your free time?" His grasp became even more unbearable for my thighs.
He was indeed making me wet, it drew me crazy how he held a truth to his words, how he could sense the warmth and how close his fingers where to my skirt, my underwear, with his hand almost shoved into my skirt, almost.
My soft fingers cupped his and drugged them off of me, a hard mission, because of his tight grip around me.
"No, but it certainly took me braincells to plan all this, ones of which you don't have." I hissed against his face.
Another smirk shown to his face.
"Are you sure darling? After all you are still a dump little girl who tries to involve herself in an industry that strictly isn't made for little wanna be's like you."A cruelty expressed through his words, his hand found another way to validate my space by wrapping around my small waist.
A cruelty combined with a Confident attitude, arrogant and selfish, Adrian made every inch of me burn in flames from fury.
For a minute I was too stunned to speak, too frustrated to scream in his face, to busy filling myself with curses underneath my breath when I finally found the courage to slightly shove him away and rest my hands on his chest.
Personal space didn't bother me, I didn't have any, I was an inch away from him, yet our relationship felt more rival than anything diversal, consumed by the anger.
"So why don't you go and find yourself a husband like Charles or Lewis, Victoria? Settle down and stop bullshitting yourself into thinking you could ever be better than any of us, because in reality I know you do this to prove you are not just another spoiled little daddy's girl." His words insulting, they like knifes to every corner of me.
You know something. Im worn out, from the day, from his attitude, from his mood swings, from everything. But I will never let him insult me like that in front of my face. I can't stay silent. I won't. I am seeing red and can't hold my mouth shut.
"Oh, Adrian you selfish arrogant prick. Feeding your pathetic self esteem with such beliefs only to present yourself as the 'perfect driver' the 'better driver' when you deny your incapibilty to win me over. You are mad a woman has come to your field and threatened your position, overpasses you and claimed a saying to the championship. You are mad I woke up, and showed up to my abilities." I say.
"You are afraid of me." I realise, my eyes firmly open.
"And I'm sorry for stealing your spotlight to conclude you to grow such insecurity for yourself that you must overcome by understimating me and the female gender which I represent, it truly deeply saddens me to see such problematic behavior with a man with such potential and recognition from women who you personally assault every day. I hope by assaulting me you win some dignity which you have lost along your journey of becoming a jerk."
I wasn't trying to play smart or anything, just clearly wanted to speak facts, calm and collected yet my words meaningful and hurtful just the right amount of insults when I was more mad than ever, I was seeing red but I kept my tone low, still my eyes flared him with criticism.
I was still influenced by his words, by his touches, his confused eyes and silent expressions, he remarked the speechless attitude and a smile dropped to my face.
I shoved him away, escaping from his warmth as I enter my car and drive as far away from there as possible.
Adrian, for once again had succeeded in taking my mind off.
[...]
"Why is he being so mean and mysoginst with me.. I will never understand him!" I let my body fall to my bed watching over the cold white ceiling which disseminated my emotions.
When I drove aware earlier I found myself outside of my hotel, Diana was in my room when I entered, and needed a heartfelt discussion since my heart still pounded like crazy from Adrian. He had that unbelievable impact into my body, my mind and soul. It drove me nuts.
"I seriously don't know. He always have been really supportive of his sister in F1 academy, Adrian was never accused of misogynism in his entire life." She shrugs.
"I have never done anything to him.. Don't you remember how he always treated me like this. From when we were kids up to now." I scoff.
"I guess he has something against you, I can't possibly know for sure." Diana says a bit indifferent to the matter, frustrated as well.
"You know this isn't even possible Diana! Everyone and when I say everyone I mean everyone, adores me and wants to befriend me even if im their rival or the most messy person alive!"
"All expect Adrian."
Adrian and I have a long history, a history which could even fit in one book. Our childhood together was a nightmare, growing up with him in my teenage years, was another nightmare. But this.. this is more than just a nightmare. This is hell, a personalised hell customised by his presence.
"Yes but remember Adrian ain't them. They don't know you the way he does. Plus, you have always been competitive with each other, moody too , so why are you questioning the reason now?"
"Because, he has entered a whole other level, I just can't stand being slut shamed or body shamed or any shamed to that matter! I can't deal with his attitude anymore!" I let out my frustration in fast breaths, in consumed irritation.
"But he only wants to get under your skin Ria, he doesnt actually mean those things." She speaks in such informality which upsets me harder causing me to hop off bed.
Why is she taking his side? Protecting him? She might as well date that asshole if she thinks he is an angel.
"No Diana!" I shout as loud as I could in the process of losing it completely. "Insults are insults aimed to harm people, he Hates me and wants to see me suffer, I mean all this blows off on dates or the backlash to everyone I was attracted to, or the sabotaging in my career and personal life, and let's not mention all the verbal attacks. But I realise just the right reason behind all this."
"Which is?" One eyebrow raised.
"He is jealous of me."
Her hand collided on her forehead in disapproval.
"Yeah, thats totally the reason Ria." She mocked,washed in sarcasm.
"I dont Care about your perspective Diana, this is totally the reason, there isn't another right explanation, he must be strictly jealous of me!"
"He is certainly jealous but not with you." She implies something which takes me into deep consideration.
"What does this supposed to mean?" My eyebrows furrowed with pure confusion as she hushed for a second.
"I'm not going to be the one to tell you. Its like a thing between you two, so you better find out for yourself smart one." She explains furthest, still I didn't get it.
"You know. You really should pick sides here because I feel like you support Adrian right now and his awful behavior towards me." I complain.
"Im not taking anyone's side I only observe and based the things he had said to me-"
"Oh, So now you are besties too, sharing stuff, spending time together, hanging out late at night." My cheeks rose red from fury, envy fulfilling my frame."You might as well don't let him keep waiting and be his girlfriend since you are close enough to speak about me." My arms crossed.
"It's not like that even though he is indeed pretty easy to date since all the girls are running behind him and desperatly ask for one night because of his utterly handsomeness." Is she daydreaming for a guy who is making my life miserable! What spell does he put to those girls?
"Are you serious?" I scream and she starts laughing hysterically! I think I'm going to explode formt he amount of anger I have received this Day! "He is not a piece of meat you know."I claim causing her utter attention.
I played it off..
"Ria,you've just received an invatation!" Leon burst in the room without even having the right manners to knock first! Just another asshole .
"Where?" I sigh, not staring at him,
"Lewis will host a party to the club for pr management reasons."
My attention is drawn back to the matter. Lewis, party, another party, it didn't seem like a right idea, yet I was so frustrated to decline.
"Is that all?" I asked.
"Nothing is scheduled for next week but also your sister must leave this Monday." He informed me.
"Hey, we should totally go visit Greece since we have the week free." Diana chimed in the conversation with my schedule.
"Yeah you should totally go visit Greece by yourself." I talked back at her, since I was mad.
Leo took the assignment and left the room without special signal message, thank god he understood the atmosphere was not safe for him at the time because of our probably burst of anger on him.
"I was thinking maybe we go together but If you don't want I can't always find somebody else." She sounds annoyed and stands on her feet and firmly places her hands I'm her waist.
"Yes, you should take your new bestie with you, Adrian. Maybe there you could confess how awesomeness hansome he is!" My ironic tone was used to her as mean negativity passed through the air. She was not having It.
"He knows he is handsome, he doesn't need me to tell him." Her tone shifts to something more serious, and motherhood making me roll my eyes like a little child.
I couldn't stop, I couldn't stop shiring how much he affected my life.
"Then confess your love for his abs, I think he will appreciate it!"
"Enough Ria!" She screams angrily this Time. "You clearly let out all this anger to me for no reason when he is the one you want to crash his face to the wall right now!" She reminded me, she wasn't near wrong, she was in fact right but I couldn't control myself. This time I couldn't.
"I just don't get it Diana! Its not fair! He is definitely not who y'all beloeve he Is! He is not a saint, he is the devil himself!" I yell in complain.
She steps closer to my body and then when she is near enough her hand takes places to my shoulder with a sympathetic understanding look on her face.
"No Ria. He is this way to you."
I trudged towards the bed ingorning completely what she said. Next think I knew I was laying on my bed, observing the ceiling in detail.
"Do you think he will bring this girl from the gala tonight?" I asked out of pure curiosity.
I don't care, i don't. I only feel bad for her, Adrian definitely doesn't like her.
"Probably." She lays next to me staring at the ceiling as well.
"Who are you going with?" I wonder whilst I exhaled a sigh.
"Uhm.. Giovanni." She stated, hesitant.
"Who!" I screamed in shock as my body automatically standed straight on that bed allowing me like that to stare her with my confusing sight. "His best friend seriously?"
"I like him, he likes me I don't see the problem!"
"Oh god.. Its Giovanni you stupid! He plays you, he is probably out cheating right this instant."
"I trust him." I noticed how she placed a hair of hairs away from the front.
Tell me she hasn't fall for him, this is as bad as falling for Adrian himself! I actually feel sorry for her.
"And I trust my panties and yet they seem to disappear a lot lately." I small wink was heading to her with this sentence.
Of course this is a lie dipped into sarcasm.
"That's because you are a slut!" We chuckled together out of this joke and ended up sitting on the bed next to each other.
I slapped a pillow onto her body and she shoved it back against me in full force.
"So will you come with me in Greece?" She then asks out of nowhere again.
*****************