Aditi's point of view
My heart feels light. Yes, I am feeling overwhelmed right now but it is because I am feeling love right now. The weight has lifted from my chest after a month and I feel as light as the air.
Yes, I still have tears in my eyes but they were not from agony. They are the happy tears of being with Dhruv again. I have smile on my face again and I again feel myself lucky to fall in love with this beautiful human being.
"Where is your car?", I asked him when my eyes fell on his bike which was parked near the park.
"From past one month she is my partner when I was searching for you.", A sudden guilt washed over me when he said that and walked to his bike.
Maybe he doesn't mean to taunt me but I still feel guilty of leaving him. He set on his bike and looked at me. I smiled to him and set behind him holding him tight. He kicked the bike and after taking a address from me he drive towards my place.
After a 10 minutes of drive I asked him to parked the car in a bike stand because from here we have to walk to my house as the lane was too thin that only two people can walked in. Because of the rain, water pool was made on the both side of the road making it smaller than usual.
I don't know what Dhruv was thinking about this place but this is the best I could afford in a short time period. This place is in the old city of Lucknow where mostly labour community lives. This place can be dangerous in night because drunk men roams around in the lane. Dhruv must be uncomfortable, walking in this lane. I looked at him and he was walking behind me without any frown on his face but he was walking carefully, not to dump his leg in the mud.
We stopped in-front of my house and I lovked the door for both of us. I moved aside and Dhruv went inside, after him I also get inside and locked the door. He looked at my house and then turn to me.
"You live here?", He asked and I nodded my head while looking down feeling conscious about this place. It wasn't as beautiful as his house. It is a simple room where I have a attached kitchen and a washroom in a single room, paint was torn of places making this place older.
"It's nice.", I looked at him and he has a smile on his face and I just keep looking at him with love. He ran his fingers in his wet hair and then I realised we both are wet because of rain.
"You must be feeling uncomfortable. You go and take shower.", I went to the small almirah I have in the room and took out a fresh t-shirt and a lower for him. Before leaving the house I put some of his clothes in my bag to feel him close to me. Every night I sleep holding his shirt closer to me. It wasn't enough but it feel his presence. When I gave him his clothes he looked at me with so many questions but there were emotions playing in his eyes and I know this night is going to be long as I have to answer all his questions.
"Before leaving the house, I stole some of your clothes from your almirah to feel you closer to me.", I said and looked down in embarrassment.
"It's okay.", I looked at him and he has smile on his face.
He took clothes from me along with the towel and went inside the washroom to shower till then I also changed my clothes after showering in a common washroom we have at the end of our lane. Many ladies has used it when they ran out of water. I have never used it but today I am exceptional. Till Dhruv was showering, I bought some groceries from the shop, made some dinner and spread a clean bedsheet on the bed. I was working on the dinner when washroom's door open and Dhruv came out from it.
"You must be hungry?", I asked him while turning to him.
"Yeah...a little.", He said while rubbing the towel on his hair.
"Dinner is ready. Can you spread the newspaper on the bed? They were putting under the matress.", I said while setting the food in two plates.
"Yeah, sure.", He replied and did what I said.
Short while I came to him with a food and he was looking outside the window, I have in my room. Rain was still pouring the outside. It seems like it's going to rain for whole night.
"Dinner....", I said while setting the plates on the bed.
He turns and looked at me. A small smile came onto his lips and he set on the bed. I also set on the bed in-front of him but he frowned when he saw two plates instead of one. He must be upset by seeing two plates instead of one. When Dhruv and I are alone, we have food from one plate. It's our thing. As I expected, he served all the food in one plate and put the another plate aside.
A lone fat tear drop from my right eye when he feed me the first morsal. He wiped the tear but did not say anything. I know I hurt him and he is still upset with me but I am happy that nothing has change between us. He still loves me as much as he was doing before. We both had our dinner in silence and feed each other from our hands. Not a single word exchange between us and I know tension is still lying between us.
I stood up with empty plates and went to kitchen to wash them while Dhruv get busy in a phone call.
After cleaning the kitchen when I came back to him, I saw him looking at his picture which was on the nightstand. Sensing my presence behind him, he turns and looked at me. There were so many emotions playing in his eyes and his eyes were speaking loudly that he wants answers.
"Is this picture is one of the things you have took from our room?", He asked while showing the picture to me. I looked down and nodded my head as yes, "Seeing you everyday has become my habit. Last time you leave, I don't have any picture of you with me. It was difficult not seeing you. So I took your picture with me.", I said timidly and looked at him. He put the picture on the nightstand and walked towards me. He stopped in-front of me and hold me softly by my waist. But I keep looking down. My guilt did not let me look into his eyes.
"If you love me so much that you can't spend a day without seeing me then why did you leave?", His voice is as low as whisper when he asked me.
Tears streams down from my cheek but I did not looked at him. " Dhruv, I maybe leave house because Anuradha aunty throw me out but what she has said that day was true. I made your life miserable. No matter how hard I tried to move on from my past, it keeps haunting me. Sometimes it was too hard to accept that. I still don't know how I manage to saty alive till now."
He cupped my both cheeks and I looked up to him with my welled up eyes.
"Then let it out what you are holding. Tell me what is in your past. Why it's keep bothering you? Share your pain with me. Aditi, I know you since you were 14 years old and I know how much pain you have gone through. I don't care what happened to you in past. You are still my Aditi whome I love like crazy. I just want you to let out this pain from your chest.", His eyes were reflecting the pain he was holding inside him.
I came out from his hold and take a step back, "But it was dark Dhruv. It's horrible. It still gives me nightmare. After knowing my past, you may not love me like you do.", I said while taking a step back. I put my hand on my mouth, when I sobbed. I have tears in my eyes.
He took a long strides and again cup my both cheeks, "Bring me to this darkness of yours so I can take you out from it. I swear on you Aditi, I will bring the hell to those who bring tears in your eyes.", His every word was holding a meaning. He was keen to know and I also don't want to hold back it anymore. I keep looking at him with my wet eyes and his eyes were reflecting that how desperately he wants to pull me out from this darkness, I was holding inside me.
I came out from his hold and slowly walked towards the window. I stood in-front it and looking outside, watching the rain which was still pouring. I don't know what happened after I confess to him about my past. He could leave me after that but atleast I have this peace inside me thqt I did not hide anything from him. Dhruv is my husband and he has every right to know what I had gone through.
"8 years ago, when you leave me with a letter I was devastated. I was never loved by my parents and after your leave I feel an empty place in my chest. For hours I used to sit under the burning sun, looking at your house door, that you might come out from it, inspite of knowing that you were never gonna come out from it. At night I used to set on my window, looking at your room's close window, remembering the little moment we have created. My life was dull and aimless. I used to feel guilty that you have to leave the city because of me. Apart from this my family had started torturing me more than before. I used to sleep in nights, clutching your letter to my chest. There was not a single day and night had soent when I did not cry remembering you. Two years has passed like this with you in my memories.", I started speaking and my mind brings me the days where I had lost my everything. Tears are streaming from my eyes but I no more can feel there hotness on my cheeks because what I have gone through was a hell and I was burnt like lava.
8 years ago...
I have turned 18 last week. I have came to know about it when I was feeling the date in my exams sheet and suddenly invigilator announced the date. I have given my 12th board final exams last week and still trying to convince my parents to let me do engineering just like Atul bhiya. I have saved some money for the forms of some entrence exams for engineering and I did well in them. I am sure I will qualify them and get the admission in one of the government college just like Atul bhiya.
I don't know how I am going to convince my parents to let me study further as they already have mentioned so many time that they are going to marry me off after I turn 18. After Diwali night no one talks to me in my family until it's necessary. They ignored me like plague. I still not firget that night when Atul bhiya beats me. He must have my blood on his belt.
I entered to my street lane and my eyes automatically fell onto his house. Tears fell from my eyes when my eyes fell on his room's closed window. It's been two years he leave the city and left me with a letter. Not a single day went when I don't miss him. It feels so lonly without him. Every night I cried, remembering him and the beautiful moment I had live with him.
I miss him.
I miss him so much that my heart ache and I want to run to him in his arms and shouted on his face that I love him so much and it is difficult to live without him. I wonder what he looks like? Does he also miss me like I miss him? What he is persuing in his graduation?
Engeneering...?
I don't think so. I am sure he was persuing a graduation which is going to help him in his civil services exams. A gust of wind touched on my face and I closed my eyes, letting my tears fall from my eyes.
Dear wind,
If you meet Dhruv then please tell him that I am missing him so much. Tell him that I am with him when he is going from hard face of life.
Dear wind,
Tell him that I love him so much.
I slowly opened my eyes, and a man came out from it. They shifted here last year. He lives here with his family and works in income tax office. His both kids study in my school. The man looked at me and passes the smile but without giving any reaction I went inside the cage which I called my house. I stopped smiling after Dhruv leave and Divya broke her friendship with me. Raghav's parents also move to Lucknow with him as they can't live without their only child. Basically I have no one here to call my friend. Everyone leave me. Sometimes it made me feels true of my mother's word. I am curse. No one wants to be with me as I bring only problems to them.
"Where were you? I was waiting for you.", Mummy came to me in a rush nd snatched all the polly bahs from my hand. She has sent me outside to bring some snacks as we are going to have a guest today.
"It was rush in the market.", I said while looking down. After Diwali night, I was not allowed to look into the eyes of anyone as according to my family I should have feel ashamed of what I have done at Diwali night. It bring shame to their family.
"Leave it and go get ready. I have put a dress for you in your room. Wear it only.", She said while pushing me towards my room.
I did not dare to question further as I was not allowed to ask them any questions nor I have any interest in the guest. Without asking anything, I went upstairs and saw a pink anarkali suit was on my bed along with accessories. I did the things half heartedly and after changing my clothes and went downstairs.
As I reached the downstairs, mummy came to me with a tray of tea cupsand asked me to hold it.
"Behave in-front of the guests and don't speak too much. Do as you asked to do.", After instructed me she went into the living room without hearing my answer.
Like a Robot I came to living room and saw my bua ji and uncle there. Bua ji's elder daughter Rihanna didi was also present. She married two years ago but she came to any relatives very rare. I wonder what brings her here today to our house. But then my eyes fell on new faces. A family was seated on the couch. A girl from Atul's bhiya's age was sitting right to Rihanna didi. A men in his late thirty's was sitting between tow elderly couple.
Papa and Atul bhiya was chating to them with brought smile and praises me soon mummy also join them started talking to them. My eyes fell onto mummy and she glare at me, gesturing me to serve the tea to the guests. But when I served the tea to that man, he smiles looking at me and brushed his thumb over my palm. I felt uncomfortable and pulls my hand back immediately. I was about to went to the kitchen when mummy stopped me and made me sit near to the mother of that man.
"This is my daughter Aditi, we are talking about.", Papa said to the elderly couple and they smiled looking at me.
"I must sasy Tripathi ji. Your daughter is beautiful. Our son Dinesh will lucky to marry a girl like your daughter.", I looked at my parents in shock when the lady spoke about me. My mother glared at me not say a word otherwise I am gone today. My eyes welled up in tears and I looked down with my racing heart. This man is probably 38 years old. I am 20 years younger then him and my parents are being happy to marry me off eith this man.
I know this is coming but I didn't expect this soon. I was expecting that my parents let me allow to graduate atleast but how could I forget that I am 18 years old now, legally legitimate to marry. But I love Dhruv and in my mind I consider him as my soulmate. I don't think I could ever give this place to anyone.
"You are underestimating your son Mrs. Bhardwaj. Your son is no less than some movie star.", My bua ji said in between. she was talking about to that person who was doubles in my age.
"Well we should thank to Rihanna for letting us know about Aditi. Otherwise we were tired to reject girls.", The man's father speak.
"Ofcourse uncle, our Dinesh deserves best and I know he also likes Aditi.", Rihanna didi teased the man who was looking at me and smiling shyly. The session has not stopped there, after that his siter teased him by my name and everyone laughed except me. Atul bhiya talked about our babies and I wanted to throw up at that time.
Soon I was sitted beside him and without knowing my concern the ritual started and his mother made me wear a red net Dupatta which was only for the brides. Everyone perform the rituals one by one, did the tilak of us and I was seated there clutching my fingers tightly, holding back my tears and praying to God give me enough courage to talk to my parents later about this arrangement.
It was evening when the guest left and I was with my family and bua ji's family trying to convince them not to marry me off.
"Mummy please, I am begging you, not to marry me off. I want study further and want to be an engineer just like Atul bhiya.", I begged in-front of my mother.
"Are you forgetting that we have let you complete your school even after you don't leave a chance to stain our reputation with that Malhotra boy.", She jerked away my hand from her hand.
"Mummy please, Dhruv wasn't at fault. We have nothing between us. Please don't say anything about him.", Though I have said this many times but still I was trying my luck that they would have believe me.
"What a shameless girl she is? Still protecting that Malhotra. I had told you Pao to marry her off two years ago but you don't listen to me. Now see her...", Atul bhiya glared at me.
"Don't worry beta no matter how much she begged in-front of us, we are going to marry her off.", Papa said while looking at me with disgust.
"But he is more than 20 years older than me. Even Atul bhiya is 14 years younger than him.", I looked at them all with raged but wet eyes.
"So what if he is older than you? He is a government employee. What do you need more huh!", My uncle shouted on me.
"You should thanks to God that he says yes to you. Otherwise no reputed family wants to make you their daughter-in-law, who has a past history of a boyfriend.", My bua ji screams on my face.
"I have told you 100th time that Dhruv and I are not even friends. Stop defaming him and what is wrong with having a boyfriend even Rihanna did had a love marriage and Atul bhiya also have a girlfriend.", As soon as the words leave from my mouth a slap was landed on my cheeks and my face turned into right. Rihanna did was standing in-front of me, fumming in anger.
"Don't you even dare to compare me with a shit like you.", Rihanna didi shouted on me while pointing her finger on me. I wasn't get over the one slap when another one was landed on my right cheek making me fall onto the ground. I looked up and it was Atul bhiya this time who slapped me.
"If you say a single word about me and my girlfriend, I will rip your skin off. Don't forget what I have done yo you on Diwali night. I'll do the worst this time.", Atul bhiya threatened me.
Hot tears leave from my eyes, burning the pain I was feeling because of the slap on my both cheeks.
Mummy came forward and pulled my hair from my scalp, making me stood on my feets. I moaned in pain.
"Mama ji, mami ji...Is this what I get after finding a capable family for her. Your daughter is out of your hand. My reputation is on stake in this perpisal.", Rihanna did asked with my parents and taunt them.
"Listen to me very carefully. You are going to marry Dinesh after two months. I don't want any fuss from your side and if you pull any stunt to cancel this arrangement, you know what I will do with you.", Mumny said through her greeted teetg and glared at me. After she satisfied, she leave me and I fall on the floor. Everyone leaves from there while I lied there on the floor, crying on my fate.
*****
"Aditi, this is your T.C.", I nodded my head and take my T.C from the principal. After receiving it, I take my leave. My parents have already told me to collect all my documents from my schools as they doesn't want themselves to bother later. So I have applied for the T.C.
School is over and soon my life also going to over. I was engaged to Dinesh last week. That day I could not hold my tears and cried till I fall sleep. Dhruv also came to my dream and asked me to move on. Now he is also leaving me in my dreams. Dinesh and his family was very happy. I don't know how Dinesh is because we never talked but whenever I see him I feel like he is my elder brother more like my would be husband. I don't how my life would torture me further but I think this can't be worst than this.
I bumped to someone and was ready to apologise when I saw Nisha in-front of me and smirking at me. She failed two times in 12th board exams and give her board exams with me. She was classmate of Dhruv but now she is passing out with me. I think having a influence family background can't help you to pass the exams. His father is not famous much to put a reference to the CBSE board to pass her dearest daughter.
Seeing her, I feel irritated. She is the one who ruined my life. Because of her Divya cut all her ties from me. Divya no more wants me to her best friend. She is the one who took mine and Dhruv's pictures from the wrong angle and manipulated my family. Because of her my handsome neighbour has to leave the city with his family.
"How is life Aditi? I hope you are doing your worst.", She mocked me.
"It's none of your business.", I ignored her and tried to walk but she blocked my way.
"I have heard that you are going to marry next month with some 37 year old man. I guess Dhruv didn't fuck you well, that you have to marry this soon to satisfy your lust.", Without hearing further I slapped her hard that it's voice echoes in the corridor of our school and my five fingers printed on her face.
"I have enough of you bitch. You just don't know how to mind your business and mind you if you say any word against Dhruv. You don't have any idea what strain you have put on his reputation. I was okay when your filthy tongue was limited to me but don't you dare to bring Dhruv in your dirty games.", I shouted on her and gave her my death glare.
"You...How dare you to talk to me like that and slapped me?", She raised her hand to slapped me but I hold it in the air, twisted her arm and pinned her to the wall. I was frustrated and angery from my family. She taunt me in a wrong time.
"You'll get one more slap if you don't shut your mouth now and I am warning you not to cross my way in future.", I leave her which made her fall on the ground holding her cheek and tears in her eyes. I too had tears in my eyes and after giving her my death glare I leave from there, leaving her cursing me.
*****
It was 5 in the evening when I was returning from my school. I got late because mummy has asked me to stop one of her friends house to give a dress which mummy has recently bought for her friend. Unlike others mummy's friend invited me in her house and did not let me leave without having a lunch. She also informed mummy that I am going to be late to home to avoid further fuss.
I was 20 minutes away from my house when suddenly two cars stopped in-front of me and very angry Rahul stepped out from the car. Seeing him, colour fade from my face. This area is isolated and this is the same place where he molested me last time but that time Dhruv saved me. I don't know what will he do to me this time.
Before I could think any further and ran from there he pinned me to the tree and leaned over me.
"How dare you to slap my sister?", He looked at me with rage but I can't be a pussy cat right now because I know there would not be Dhruv to save me this time.
"She deservse it. Teach your sister how to behave with others.", My tears were threatening to leave but I mustered my courage and speak back to him.
"I think you should lean how to behave with others when I have my ways with you.", He smirked at me but his eyes were reflecting something dangerous.
"Whh....what do you mean?", I was stammering and I don't know I was having a feeling that he is going to do something sinister. Before I could do anything he out a duct tape on my mouth and shove me on his shoulder. I screamed for help but it was died down in the tape. I punched on his back kicked on his abdomen but it was no use. He put me in a van. His friends hold my both hands and legs to stop my struggles and I don't know after where they had bring me.
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