water dropped to the ground between his feet as he stepped out of the shower to grab a towel. Kyungsoo inhaled. he'd cleaned himself off again, something he'd been doing more than ever since hed came to this pack in which everyone loved to shower, specially eujin. She'd earned a couple of groans for taking a long time and rushing first into the bathroom after training or in the morning. Her unapologetic nature suggested the others couldnt have minded it enought to punish her-
kyungsoo stopped whiping the towel over his hair, he'd used to think a lot about punishments and what they meant but here, he'd nearly forgotten what real punishments were. all alpha sojoon did was make them apologize or talk. it was disgusting, there was never any blood spilled, not on the alphas terms. Recalling even the time alpha sojoon was mad felt unreal even after all this time. how can someone like sojoon be an alpha and a pack like this exist.. how can the boneheaded wolves in school exist. it felt like hed cheated and jumped from his world to another and alpha sojoon wanted him to stay.. he wanted him to fit in.
his tired eyes glanced over the uneven skin over his legs, a mark from the house he'd watched burn down long ago with screams following close behind him, the sound of flames swallowing wood, curtains, beds and wardrobes and as his eyes traveled further he looked upon the many claw marks, unable to even remember how he'd gotten them.
Kyungsoo had many marks about incidents on his body but he'd never looked or thought of them in the way he'd been doing so here, ever since he noticed how clear jennies skin was, ever since everyone else pointed out his scars in questions and sad looks, they never looked at him like that before. nobody ever did, they would mock his body and marks at most but never ask and say sorry for them. His eyes lifted to the long mirror against the wall and he turned to look over his back at the scattered lines over his shoulder blades and down his ribs traveling over his side. and as he turned back his eyes trailed the burns and dots of cigarettes over his forearm, the other being skinnier where hed clearly lost too much meat to regenerate it, the lines of stabs and the bites all over him. he balled his hand to a fist and finall looked away to grab his clothes.
kyungsoo had more marks than he dared to count or pay attention to, too many to remember more than the few that left scars not visible but he learned to carry them all.
-
" what are you doing ?" kyungsoo stepped up to the tree and the spot it threw a shadow over.
jongin glanced up from his book confused " what ?"
" go away " he demanded, holding his carving board and little pen in hand, hed gotten another one from yixing and just wanted to get it over with on the usual spot he always took because it was quiet, peaceful and he loved breathing the free air while he focused on carving, little did he know that the spot had already been occupied by the said beta by the time he'd reached it
" no " jongin nearly huffed out, irritating the boy further.
" this is my spot "
it took the beta a moment to realize hed been serious by looking over the displaced omega " excuse me?"
" its my spot, I always sit here when I carve so move " he pushed on " read your stupid book elsewhere "
jongin finally sat up further when kyungsoo stared down at him motioning toward the board he was carrying like the taller had been an idiot but he only shock his head.
" no " he shock his head feeling rediculed " carve your teletaphies elsewhere, porcelain "
" stop calling me that, do I look fragile to you?"
the beta chuckled so kyungsoo nudged him with his foot as he ordered once more " just fuck off already " jongin finally slapped his foot away somwhat angered himself now
" you really have no respect for anyone I was here first, you find another spot.. " he moved his lips slowly as if to patronize him as he uttered "Porcelain "
" thats it " kyungsoo finally got down and pushed against him with his carving board to which ongin gripped at it, turning it only to have kyungsoo let go and kick against it.
beta tumbled back in surprise, having dropped the board as he looked back at the omega who stomped closer, and gripped the board to pick back up and turn away again.
" seriously ?" jongin stood up, eyes watching the shorter take a seat on the freed spot unbothered " youre just being a prick on purpose now arent you? I was here first "
" but I always sit here, so maybe your doing it on purpose " he snapped back so jongin growled, eyes glowing in gold which only triggered the omega as he glared back at him in blue.
" leave now or you'll regret it" the beta warned.
" I dont think so," he moved his lips slow in imitation as he uttered " nutcracker "
jongin rushed at him again at that and kyugsoo swung the board, crashing it against the betas blocking forearm, resulting in it flying away as Jongin swung his other fist and the omega ducked, attempting to knee him in the guts as he came up again but the tallers arm came between simulatiously kneeling into the shorters side instead.
kyungsoo stumbled, holding his ribs but keeping balance to dodge the next fist and swing his own which got caught and turned in attempt to twist and throw him off but the omega jumped with a backflip to follow and twist the tallers instead, pullinghim closer and slamming his elbow into the betas shoulder to throw him off before kicking him to fall back at last.
with a grunt jongin was on the ground, hands flying up to hold onto kyungsoo foot that was attempting to stomp on him, he kicked up instead and the omega didnt have the strength to hold it, throwing him off balance and making him land onto his front besides jongin, who still gripped to his ankle, quickly moving onto both the boys legs making it impossible for kyungsoo to get up again as jongin finally turned him to lay on his back, keeping him down by caging him and gripping the 2 swinging arms to pin them down by his wrist.
breathing heavy jongin stayed in this postion on top, looking down at the alming omega " you done ? mh?"
kyungsoo was panting himself but didnt answer as he grunted trying to push against the beta to no success whilst jongin just remained not believing hed been breathless from so little action but it was the fact that it felt somehwat challengin that made it more thrilling to him.
and then, being distracted, jongin found himself caught in surprise as kyungsoos knee managed to hit his back good and suddenly. he flinched and it gave the shorter a moment in which he lost his grip and leaned back allowing kyungsoo cradle what little he could back and swing his leg up both falling to either of the betas shoulders and jongins hand flew to the legs on his shoulder while the other found a gripp around the shorters throat causing both to be in a position to choke the other while they were being choked.
kyungsoo grunted eyes glowing as he squeezed his thighs close around jongin throat, while clinging onto the hand that was queezing his own, glaring back into the golden glowing eyes
both remained for what both assumed being way too long until jongin finally gave in and let kyungsoos throat go to push his thighs away.
the omega started coughing rolling away while jongin dropped to all 4 of his limps, breathing in gasps of breaths at first. " fine just take the damn spot, how can you care so much about something to stupid "
" you were the one running at me first, fucking nutbag " kyungsoo nessily threw grass at him, holding his throat as he got back onto his feet but jongin only sighed sitting now.
" you provocted it and you know it "
" I told you to stop calling me porcelain and get off my spot "
" its not your spot ! you fucking asshole !"
" it is ! I'm claiming it !" kyungsoo yelled in return, angrily picking up the cracked board and jongin groaned in frustration standing up only to halt when he noticed the boy opening his pants.
" what- what are you doing ??" he rushed to him and the omega turned to him ready to fight again as he glared " marking my territory since you bonehead cant-" " stop " jongin frowned at him in disbelief " are you for real ?"
kyungsoo pushed him back by his chest and continued to open his pants only to have the betas hands stop his again " fine ! fine, fuck just stop. its your spot just dont.. fucking pee all over the place like a wild wolf, I mean what do you take me for!?"
" an unavoidable irritation" kyungsoo snapped pulling his hands out of the betas.
jongins sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose " 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. patience.. " he inhaled "control.. patience cradles control.. " he mumbled breathing through and turning away to pick his book up again while kyungsoo frowned after him " the fuck are you counting shit for now ?"
" its called selfcontrol, maybe one day you'll learn it but who are we kidding " jongin turned his back to him and sat down a bit further away.
kyungsoo watched him for another few moments as if to make sure he really wouldn't do anything before he closed his pants again and turned to his carving board instead seating down onto his spot at last as he pulled the pen and started carving the marked line. Now and then hed glance over his shoulder to jongin in thought.
he really did not like the beta, he never knew what to think of that prick, part of him wanted to rip his face off the other felt it being wrong if he did so. he just couldn't stand him and everytime they were left alone together all they'd do was argue and eventually fight while knowing neither could actually kill the other because they were suppose to be on the same side. it was exhausting, usually kyungsoo knew how to deal with these kind of people, he would threaten them and if they wouldnt listen he would show how real the threats were and then they'd cower away and never bother him again. He didnt find eujin, yixing or jennie irritating enough to truely threaten but it worked with jay, he knew how to make him back off, it worked with jennie and chanyeol but it didnt work with this one. jongin wasnt afraid of him because he was convinced the omega wasnt dangerous to him. Jongin, just like kyungsoo, knew how to handle himself so instead of stepping back like the others, he stepped closer and threatened him in return. It was frustrating the least.
kyungsoo was confident however, he knew if it came down to it he could actually hurt the beta even if the taller clearly felt otherwise and sometimes he'd felt tempted to proof him wrong. kyungsoo just didnt like that he wasnt a danger in jongins eyes. he wished to see some fear in those piss eyes of his one day.
Time passed and kyungsoo had almost finished his carved picture more in anger than commitment. Not that, that mattered. The last few carvings he'd done always ended up looking completely different than the lines he'd been given because somehow he'd always find himself carving a line only his mind pictured instead of the lines yixing had drawn for him and the older never really commented on it so he figured it didnt really matter, all that mattered was that it exercised his wrist and hand movement, which had improved.
Forming and keeping a fist had become much easier, so despite his earlier doubts yixing seemed to be capable of treating others. Kyungsoo also appreciated that yixing had shut down eujin asking why the omega didnt just shift to help heal himself and recover Faster like most do.
He inhaled, hesitating in carving as he had to catch himself from going back to memories he'd much rather pretended dont exist, which is why
He didnt feel like sharing any of it, he didnt feel like having anyone know about it Including alpha sojoon, who'd also asked him back then aswell after he went into heat the first time and depended on repressments ever since. it wasnt normal for his age to depend on pills for it.
the wolf shouldve learned how to repress it only causing omegas moodswings during the cycle. but kyungsoo didnt know what that was like anymore. he wasnt like jennie anymore..
he was a real omega anymore
Kyungsoo blinked, looking down onto the board. Never had it been so peaceful and quiet.. so uneventful before that he would even think of these things. They were never relevant, never priority but now.. there was nothing else to worry about.
Nothing but the fact that he looked so different from any omega he came across these days. He wasnt as clean as them and he didnt have the memories they had and he could never have a future like any of them.
Kyungsoo leaned back as he looked at a particular dark and deep slit he carved into the board, having missed it and accidently cut into his finger qithout noticing earlier. His eyes watched the little blood roll down and get cut in the slit, remaining there but having left a dark line in its trail.
He moved his finger over it, he rarely bled these days and never like he used to. It was almost like he would forget what blood felt like on his hands or under them as he laid on the ground, numb.
Like when he'd watched the ashes of the house fly peacefully through the air. It had been a bright night, The moon made sure of it and kyungsoo watched it from where he laid.
He knew he should be getting up and running but at that time all he did was lay there and look back at the moon who did nothing either. Dimmed screams were errupting in the back, pleads and cries but kyungsoo stayed down and wheezed in one breath after another.a tear rolled down his temple, if he foudn the strength to talk he'd ask the moon why it did nothing but watch even on the one night he would've accepted any help there was, the one night he'd pleaded.
Kyungsoo lowered his hand fromt he carving board. It was getting dark, he shouldnt think of these things and be bitter about them. All he had left was hate toward those wh wronged him and those who'd watched. He didnt believe in the stories of the moongoddess, he knew better than to believe. Int he end He couldnt rely on anyone But himself.
he put the board down, dragging himself to the present time and recognizing a memory for what it was.. a memory.
an exhale made him turn his head back to jongin, who was sleeping further away, the stupid book he'd been reading layed open over his face while his hands were folded over his chest like he'd just died but the exhale let him know he wasnt so lucky.
titling his head with narrowed eyes the omega watched the steady rise and fall of the betas chest in curiosity. jongin didnt really shift either, he concluded. from the time he trained with them, he'd picked up on the fact that eujin and jongin prefered an armour and weapons over a shift. Jay and chanyeol relied on shifting and sojoon was comfortable and skilled as both, relying more on what would be more fitting in the circumstances.
Regardless, hed seen all of them in their wolf shape before but he didnt catch a single glimpse or mention of jongins.
As kyungsoo moved closer, he spotted a scar on the betas neck disappearing into his shirt and he titled his head again to look at as much of it as he could. it mustve been quite the injury to leave a scar like that behind. he'd heard of jongins past, the beta had told him himself that he used to be sold aswell, but was that all? he wondered as he quietly sneaked closer, pressing his lips together, he rose his chin and peakrd down at the bit of scar visible. He spotted another one beside it, another line and it made him frown. Surely fighting in some sort of blackmarket match, wouldn't be the only thing that happened to him. What kind of match would leave a clean line like that afterall.
his finger reached out once he'd noticed how straight it was. It couldnt have been a scar from being slashed in a fight. It had to be carved and as kyungsoo lifted the shirt little to look, it almost seemed like it was carved in a way he'd recognized before, a clean line traveling down and taking a turn. He'd seen a butcher work like this before, collecting important organs to sell-
jongins hand sprung up and grabbed the omegas wrist, squeezing it hard and upruptly enough to have the boy flinch and also gripp back onto it.
"what are you doing ?" he asked lowly, moving the book and kyungsoo frowned while the beta sat up and pushed his hand away.
" what is that scar? "
" none of your business " he closed the book, unbothered as he turned to look at him " you done? "
suspicious kyungsoo kept his eyes on him for another moment but eventually decided to drop it considering that the beta wasnt pushing on for information from him either anymore. sojoon said giving space was considerate and sojoon wished he could learn to be more considerate
without another word, he stood up and started collecting his things while jongin still sat, sighing tiredly and probably at his aching back.
Kyungsoo stood and then rolled his eyes.
" youre gonna go inside now or what ?"
irritated but also confused the beta glanced from the moon back at him " why do you care ?"
" I took your keys when we were fighting " kyungsoo looked down at him and his growing confusion " what, why ?"
" I forgot mine and alpha sojoon told us to keep the doors locked after ourseleves, how else am I suppose to enter" he shrugg annoyed.
" so you just take mine ?"
" thats what I just said, so are you coming or you wanna spent the night outside, nutcracker"
jongin only sighed, not having the enegry to argue with him again and possible even get into another neverending fight so instead he moved to get up " at least return my keys "
Kyungsoo threw his keys at him and he caught it, looking over the chain to check if anything was missing before pushing it back into his pocket, where he noticed a hole had been made on. The outside, ripped.
" seriously?" Jongin looked after the now walking omega, who only looked back at him with a little smirk before continuing his path.
The beta glanced up to the moon, exhaling to calm his nerves before putting the keys into his other pocket and following the omega at last. It took everything in him to stay calm. It really shouldnt have surprised him afterall. At least he didnt have to worry about the boy physically hurting anyone of the pack anymore.
His outburst at school, he thought, he still needs to work on that. Jongin felt like he'd learned more about ways to calm and hold the omega still than the omega actually learned about self control. He glanced over to the omega walking, he looked so small and harmless if he wasnt jumping or threatening anyone.
" did you tell sojoon about the trip ?"
Kyungsoo briefly looked back at him before away " I did, he wants me to go if i want to "
" do you want to ?" He asked in return more in disbelief than seriousness.
" I've wanted to go to the mountains for a while.. without- being on the run.. I always wondered if waterfalls are real "
jongin couldnt help but chuckle, glancing down at the omega again, half questioning if he suddenly developed a sense of humor but quickly was met with a glare in return.
The beta bit away a smile " they're real, procelain"
" everyone always says that but how does that even work?" Kyungsoo frowned " where does the water come from "
the beta stopped in his steps to look at him and the omega stopped aswell, glancing back confused. He'd been serious, jongin thought and it surprised him as he answered " the rain.. "
" but how can fucking rain create this much water, mh? "
yet again jongin huffed out a chuckle while he looked over him, he couldnt help but suddenly for once find the little one.. cute, how innocently he questioned things he'd obviously thought of before. It was unusual
" erm.. the rain will wash down the rocks of the mountain until it creates a pool? all the water gathers in it and then overflows and basically washes away all the minerals and little rocks- it just breaks off the grounds- the pool and then... falls" he shrugg his shoulders not knowing if the shorter really understood or not, hed been told before that he was awful at explaining even the most simple things.
" still cant picture it " kyungsoo looked aside, annoyed. Hesitant as he swallowed and glanced back up " did.. did you see them ?"
Jongin looked over his eyes before nodding
" I did.. "