Ashley's POV
Before the evening started out, I thought the worst disaster would be getting caught and Tristan finding out about everything. I didn't think we would be sitting in this awkward silence with my mother and Layla sending each other looks from across the table.
Even the food became difficult to swallow and I tried to think of things to say to break the tension.
"So, the weather outside seems great," I said, clearing my throat. "I thought it would surely snow today," I added.
The only response I got was the sound of forks beating against the plates, which got even louder.
"The weather can be unpredictable, can't it?" Tristan added awkwardly.
I noticed Katy lowering into her chair. If given the chance, I'm pretty sure she will find a way to escape.
Mom cleared her throat, loosening her grip on her fork. "Since I first met your son, I've been curious about the kind of people who raised him," Mom said. "Can you believe the first time I met him, he was sneaking around and dropping my daughter off at some corner like a common criminal? "Mom added.
Tristan's father coughed, nearly choking on his food.
Why was Mom bringing this up? I thought we had gone through this situation already.
Layla shot a look at Tristan, before returning to her calm expression. Of course, I had already told her
"I'm sure he must have had a reason otherwise he wouldn't have done what he did," she argued in his defence. "Besides, we raised him to be an honest, decent, and hard-working young man. He has always done so well. You wouldn't believe the number of medals he won in high school. We didn't have anywhere to put them." She added.
Why did it feel like I was trapped in a parents' meeting?
Mom chuckled. "Too bad medals can't teach a child manners," Mom remarked.
"Mom," I whispered to her in a warning tone. She was taking this too far, she needed to be stopped.
By the look on Mom's face, it didn't seem like she would stop anytime soon. She was determined to win this one.
"Ashley," Katy turned towards me. "Weren't you sneaking out in the middle of the night so you could go to a party?" she asked.
Of all the times I considered digging a grave for my sister, I have never been more desperate to find a shovel than I did right now. Of all the times she could have brought this up.
Mom's eyes widened as she stared at me with a murderous glare. After all these years she still hadn't found out. I thought giving Katy all my candy during that year's Halloween was an incentive enough to ensure this was never spoken about again.
I shot Katy a look, which surprisingly worked in silencing her.
And of course, Layla usedthis as an opportunity to brag about whata great mother she was. "Tristan would never have done anything like that. He was too busy being one of the most successful businessmen in the hotel industry." Layla bragged. "I will always be proud of him," Layla added.
"It's easy for you to say since it wasn't your car that he crushed at fifteen." Tristan's dad remarked.
"You know, no child isperfect. "Layla answered shooting a look at her husband. "By eleven, he was smarter than most people his age." She continued.
"I used to skip classes too," Tristan added casually.
He really wasn't trying to help himself much.
This somehow left Layla speechless, even she didn't have a rebuttal to that one. "Both of our children are idiots, aren't they?" Layla muttered.
I expected Mom to make a comment, but instead, she nodded her head, agreeing with Layla. "That we can both agree on." Mom shook her head at me, showing her disapproval.
***
I thought this evening would never get better, but it turns out, the one push they needed was to start hating on their own kids.
Although my mother had decided never to drink, a few glasses of wine with Layla was enough to seal their newly formed friendship. The two of them were on the couch laughing and talking together.
"He was such an idiot. He was four at the time. I caught him in the kitchen with chocolate all over his face and hands. I asked him about it and he completely denied it." Layla laughed. She took a sip of her wine.
"Ashely did the same too. She took some cookies from the cupboard, and I found a trail of crumbs all the way to her bed. She was covered with it all over her face and her hands." Mom laughed.
At this rate, I'm surprised they both haven't started braiding each other's hair. Maybe they were better off hating each other.
Tristan was around the kitchen corner speaking to his father, something about business other wise I would have rather joined their conversation. Katy disappeared upstairs the first chance she got. I was left third-wheeling my mom and Layla while listening to them talk trash about us. By the way they sounded, it seemed like they'd wanted to join a support group for a very long time.
I excused myself from the living room, steppingoutside to breathe in our small backyard. It didn't surprise me that no one noticed I was gone.
I sat on the bench. We didn't have space for much outside except the bench and a few of my mom's flowers. I'm sure she loved them more than us.
I looked up at the stars. It was my calm in this storm I'd dragged myself into. Surprisingly the weather wasn't nearly as cold as I expected.
I was nearly startled when a figure sat beside me. I hadn't even noticed it when Tristan stepped in.
"Are you okay?" he asked settling beside me.
I nodded. "Our parents really hate us you know," I said.
"You think?" He looked at me with his eyebrows raised. "My mother once told me that if she didn't have me, she'd probably be a supermodel." He answered.
"Oh, yeah," I replied with a chuckle.
"I don't think it was true though because then that would mean she would actually have to work." He joked.
I couldn't help but laugh. "She might hear you and take back all those nice things she said about you." I laughed.
"I thought your mother loved me. What happened?" He asked.
"I'm sure it wasn't personal. She would even throw me under the bus just so she can be right." I answered.
"By the way, who were you sneaking out to meet?" He skipped to his next question.
"If my mother ever asks, I sneaked out to go to the library. I was a very good girl." I answered jokingly. I didn't think he wanted to know about my failed attempts at being rebellious. "We should probably get back in there, in case they change their minds and decide to murder each other," I answered.
I stood up, ready to return to the house. Tristan stopped me, grasping my hand in his. "Wait," he whispered.
I returned my attention to him, watching him intently.
He stood up, his figure towering over me while his hand still held onto mine.
He paused, his eyes meeting mine. He all of a sudden seemed anxious about something.
"Since I met you, our journey has been a rollercoaster ride with its many ups and downs. I can't think of anyone else I want to spend every moment with. I think about you every day. The more I think about it the more I've come to realize that..." He paused. "I'm in love with you." He whispered.
I stood there shocked, unresponsive, and unable to say anything.
I don't know what it was that got to me, the fact that he said he loved me or that his lips were just an inch away from mine.
He was in love with me? I didn't know whether to jump with joy or start weeping. This was thehappiest moment in my life and the saddest because I knew this wouldn't last.
What was I going to do? Jump into his arms and confess my love for him too? Maybe pushing him away would be safer for everyone.
The tense look he gave me made me feel worse. I couldn't lie to him and tell him I didn't love him with him looking at me with those eyes. I also couldn't tell him that I loved him when I knew I was hurting him more than anyone else. He sensed my hesitation.
"You don't need to say anything," Tristan added as I felt him pull away. "I'll always be patient with you. I know you feel it too with this thing between us and that it's not just in my head." He continued.
"Ashley," Layla called out behind us. She grabbed both of our attention. She couldn't have shown up at a better time. "Could I steal her away for a moment?" she asked.
Tristan looked at me for my approval, to which I nodded.
He then returned to the house.
Layla waited until Tristan was out of sight before we both settled on the bench.
She paused, taking a deep breath. "I know that look in your eye." Layla began. "I can say that I know you well enough to say that I'm sure that you desperately want to tell him the truth." She added.
"He told me he loved me and I couldn't even say it back knowing I've been lying to him this whole time," I whispered back to her.
"I know you probably think that I'm superficial and a horrible mother and that may be partially true but trust me, I really do love him. Sure enough, I'm willing to go to extreme measures at times but that just makes me a mother. I've never seen him happier than when he is with you. I know this whole thing may have started out as a lie but what I see between you two is very much real and I know the truth will only hurt everyone." She added.
"How I'm I supposed to face him knowing I'm lying to him and getting his hopes up?" I nearly sobbed.
"This whole thing is my fault. I should never have asked you to lie about being pregnant. I shouldn't have hired that doctor or done any of that. I'll make sure that I'll get you out of this and that there won't be any more lies." She added.
She took my hand into hers, rubbing it gently.
"I should probably get back inside before someone hears us." She smiled.
She pulled away from me, left her seat and walked back into the house.
I was left alone with my thoughts. One thing was clear, I was utterly in love with Tristan. I didn't mean to, but I fell in love with him deeply.
I wanted to be selfish and keep him and hope the truth never came out but it wouldn't be fair.
But one thing was clear, you don't hurt those you love.
I nearly jumped from my shot, matching back into the house and then upstairs straight to my bedroom.
I wiggled under my bed to retrieve the letter I had written in the far corner.
It was now or never. Therewould never be the right moment to tell him. Things were only getting worse and I didn't want to continue hurting him.
Hearing some noises outside in the street, I looked out my window to find Tristan just outside our front gate. It appeared that he was in the middle of an intense phone call.
He looked agitated. His neat hair was messed up by his frantic as he kicked into the air.
What was he doing outside?
It must have been because of some business call but I wasn't going to keep making excuses for myself.
I sat down on my bed, completing the letter in an urgent and frantic handwriting.
After nearly fifteen minutes locked up in my room, I folded the letter back into its neat square. I took a deep breath. I was just about to undo the one thing I'd been trying to do for the last few weeks.
I walked downstairs on my way outside to meet him. Coincidentally, he just walked back into the house.
I froze on the spot, unable to form a sentence. Coincidentally, he didn't say anything either. I couldn't read his face.
"Are you okay?" I finally managed to ask. "You seemed upset earlier," I added.
"It's just work," he answered defensively.
He definitely wasn't in a goodmood. Whatever it was, it had riled him up. "Well, I have something to tell you." I began.
I quickly grab his hand, placing the letter in it before changing my mind. "I think it isbetter if you read it. I will probably start stuttering and then I will never be able to get the words out." I rumbled.
He stared at the page in his hand clueless before placing it in his pocket.
"Don't tell me the two of you were together," Layla interjected. "We should go home before you start making me a grandchild." She laughed.
"Oh wait, they already did that," Mom added.
They both laughed like lunatics. This was the first time I'd seen my mom under the influence.
This was some way to embarrass your children.
I felt my legs shake at the thought of Tristan reading that letter. Had I made the right decision?
I couldn't continue to lie to him but I'm not sure if I was ready for the consequences either. Especially knowing I'd lose him.
We all said our goodbyes soon after. All the while, I couldn't stop thinking about how easy it would be to slip my hands into his pockets and steal back the letter, but I didn't.
I waited at the front door as they droveaway. Thismay be the last time I see them.
"Why do you look like you just did something stupid?" Katy asked drawing me out of my thoughts.
"He had to know," I answered. I walked past her to return to my bedroom.
I'm pretty sure tomorrow I'll be the most hated person in the world.