~JJ's pov~
I had no clue when we finally arrived to outer banks. I just remember Sarah shaking my shoulder and saying that we have to go before anyone else sees us.
At furst I didn't even relaise that there was someone else asleep on me. I looked down at the curly haired girl between my arms. She looked so peaceful.
Her lips were parted and she'd ocasionally let out snoring sounds, something I might bring up at some point or another when we won't have so many problems.
I didn't have the heart to wake her up especially not after I was sure she didn't get a good sleep in days.
But I had to otherwise someone would defenitly see her and eventually tell her parents, that probably know already, that she's not at the camp anymore.
It took me a few minutes to manage to wake her up without alarming her but it eventually worked.
"Hey" I said, when she moved her head to look at me.
"Hey" she said, smiling a little even if it didn't really feel like she mant it.
"We gotta go before anyone else sees us" I said, helping her to get up.
She just nodded, picking up a backpack from the boat's floor and handing me the other one.
We followed the others off the boat and walked for a while till we John B suddenly stopped and turned towards us.
"We really have nowhere to go" he said moving a hand through his hair.
"I'm sure that I can try convince my parents to let you come with me" said Pope trying to make the situation better.
"They barely let Cleo so I doubt they'll let four more people in" said Sarah even if she didn't seem to focus too much on the conversation.
She moved further from us, sitting down on the dock while her legs were almost touching the water.
"We should really go but call as soon as you get a phone and if any of you don't find a place then come to my place and I'm gonna figure something out" said Pope while Cleo kneeled down next to Sarah.
"Maybe you could go to Ward's place" she said waiting for an response or reaction from Sarah but she kept looking at the water in front of her.
Cleo got up giving us a comforting smile and turned around to leave with Pope. At least they had a place, in the worst case scenario they could sleep in Heyward's shop or something.
The silence took over us again and neither of us talked for a while.
I kept trying to steal a few glances at Kie without really caring if anyone else would figure something.
She was playing with a stick in the sand, making random shapes and letters. She didn't seem too focused on the conversation either.
"Maybe we could use Ward's apartment" Sarah suddenly said breaking the silence.
"No way I'm gonna live in there" I said but as soon as I saw her look I relaise that I said it little harsher than I intended, especially after everything that happened in the last few days.
"Then where are you gonna go JJ?" Sarah asked, moving a little to look at me but still letting her legs fall over the dock, almost touching the water.
I shrugged, not knowing what to say.
"Well that's where me and John B are going, if you change your mind you're free to come too" Sarah said before throwing her legs back on the dock and getting up.
"Kie? You coming?" asked John B turning to look at Kie who still didn't seem to hear anything.
She shaked her head without anymore details and countinued to move the stick in the sand. John B noded even if Kie probably wasn't even paying attention to him.
"We should meet tomorrow morning at Heyward's and take the boat towards Charleston and change the gold into moneys" he said before following Sarah.
Now it was only me and Kie.
Something I was waiting for since we finally left that plane but right now, when it finally happend, I felt nervous and worried.
I didn't even know what I was worried for but I knew that this was too good to be true.
"Maybe we can go check the Chateau?" Kie suddenly asked breaking the silence and snapping me out of my thoughts.
What was even there to see?
All that was left from the Chateau were the hammocks, their tree and some burned furniture. But I didn't say I don't wanna go.
It's not like we had anywhere else to go.
"Alright" I said following Kie.
Neither of us said anything on the away there. We just walked in silence and I was glad Kie couldn't read his mind.
All I could think about was if this is the right thing. I felt like being happy right now was a selfish thing.
And it was hard as hell not to be happy when I finally kissed Kie.
But at the same time I couldn't be happy.
Not when the only thought in my head was that I'm gonna ruin her too.
She has a future, she even had a family, she's gonna countinue school, do something smart, she could be with someone who's not as fucked up as I am, she could be with someone her parents would like and with someone who could introduce her to his parents.
Damnit I didn't even have parents to introduce her to. I didn't even had a place right now.
I didn't realise we got to the Chateau until Kie stopped.
What once was John B's home, no fuck this, this was all of our home, was now just some burned funiture and broken windows.
Kie was the first to move, she slowly got in what once was the living room looked around like she was searching for something. I followed her slowly, looking around and trying to recognise anything.
I couldn't tell if that was the chair me and John B broke while playing pirates or the one John B jumped on, breaking one leg.
"I think my ukuleles burned in here" Kie said moving with her legs some burned funiture they couldn't recognise but I thought it was a part of the table.
"Right before I wanted to ask you to teach me how to play" I joked trying to light up the mood a little.
"I'm planning on getting a new one, don't worry" she said turning towards me with a small smile.
We kept looking around between burned funiture and objects, trying to sort some good stuffs but we couldn't find anything.
I still couldn't believe that the only place I could call home burned down. I remembered all the times I'd come here when my dad was drunk enough to not notice me and forget everything the next day.
Me and John B would play all the stupid games that existed, sometimes we would arrange all the chairs and pillows on the floor, trying not to touch the floor. Or when big John would come home with all the craziest things and souvenirs he'd get for John B and most of the times for me too.
He'd even get things for Pope and Kiara too when they started hanging out with me and John B.
We all knew eachother since kindergarten but we weren't exactly friends since the beginning.
First, me and John B became friends in third grade when John B decided to share some of his food with me.
I didn't want anyone else to become friends with us, I had John B and I didn't need anyone else.
That's why I didn't like when Kie became friends with John B.
They became friends in fifth grade when Kiara punched some kid for messing with John B so the next day John B introduced her to me saying that she's cool enough to hang out with us.
I didn't like it so I tried my best to convince her to leave us alone.
I even tried to prove her that she can't keep up with us at a surfing contests and I was shocked when I saw how easily she beat John B and she almost beat me too.
After this I gave up trying to push her away but I still didn't like her.
But changed on Christmas. John B made me go to Kie a day before Christmas and bring her a box with some handmade decorations she forgot at the Chateau the day before.
After complaining for twenty minutes I gave up and went to her house.
I figured her parents weren't home when Kiara asked who it is and told me from inside to open the door myself.
When I opened the door I didn't even notice her, all the decorations and the huge tree in the middle of the living room took me attention.
I knew others celebrate Christmas, I saw John B having a small tree and a few handmade decorations and saw the decorations at school but Kiara's living room looked like Santa's workshop. Or at least I thought it looked like this.
"This are all your decorations?" I asked in shock looking around mesmerised by all the lights.
"Yeah it's not ready though, we still have to finish the tree" Kiara said sounding a little ashamed, which confused me even more.
"Your house look like the ones in Christmas movies" I said putting the box on the couch and inspecting the milk and cookies on the table next to the tree.
Apparently, her house wasn't even finished, she still had lots of decorations to put around. I kept inspecting every little light and box with decorations until I noticed the sign that was supposed to stay next to the cookies and let Santa know that the cookies were for him.
"Don't tell me Santa actually comes and brings you gifts" I said as a joke but then I noticed Kie's confused expression.
"You don't get gifts?" Kiara asked but this time she didn't seem confused, she seemed like she felt bad.
I noticed that her expression changed so I quickly thought of a way to make this sound as a joke.
I felt stupid for thinking I wasn't the only one that wasn't getting gifts. My dad already told me that Santa doesn't come at kids like me.
"Nah Santa probably doesn't even fit on the door after all the cookies he eats" I tried to joke but Kiara didn't laugh.
"So why did you need this box so urgent?" I asked trying to change the subject.
"My family is coming tomorrow night to celebrate Christmas and I made some homemade decorations as a gift for them" she said, checking the decorations in the box.
"As you see, I delivered them in the perfect form and since i know you I'm giving you a discount and I'm only gonna ask you for ten dollars but the next time it'll be twenty"
This time she smiled at least.
"Yea sure, in your dreams maybe" she said before leading me towards the door.
I spent the next day enjoying my time alone.
My dad left to some bar to celebrate the Christmas night saying that he deserves at least a day free.
But I didn't even care.
I was having all the house to myself.
Everything was great until I started feeling lonely.
I wondered how John B and Kiara were spending their Christmas.
John B was probably listening to one of big John stories and Kiara was probably eating amazing food her parents made for the family reunion she was having.
I looked down at my sandwich, it wasn't as fancy as I thought Kiara's or even John B's food was but it wasn't that bad. And the bread wasn't molded which could be called fancy too.
Suddenly I heard someone knocking on the door. No one ever knocks at our door unless it's the police to let me know that my dad was gonna be taken for a few days.
I opened the door, leaving the unfinished sandwich on the table, and saw the curly haired girl with a big picnic sandwich in her hands.
I got out, quickly closing the door behind me before she'd see that the only decoration I had was some globe I stole from school.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, making sure my dad was nowhere around.
I couldn't risk him coming home right now when someone else was around.
"I told my mom I was tired and sneaked out, the reunion was too boring but I couldn't waste the food" she said winking towards me and showing me the picnic basket. "Besides I think it'd be much more fun to eat it with you than eat it with my family and listen the same boring story for the fourth time"
I hoped she didn't notice the sound my stomach made at the mention of food. I really couldn't refuse.
"Well I'm never gonna refuse free food" I said but as soon as I noticed she was walking towards my door I stopped her.
"It's better if we eat on the beach" I said and started walking towards there before she could say anything.
When we got on the beach I helped her arranging the blanket she brought with her on the sand and watched as she started taking out lots of casseroles with food.
We spent the rest of the evening talking, laughing at the most stupid things and eating the food.
I was pretty sure that I've never ate better food in my life before.
"I have something for you" Kie said, searching for something in her pocket.
She took out a small bracelet and handed it to me. I looked at it for a while then back at her not knowing what to say.
"It's not much but..." she started but I intrerupted her.
"No, Kie it's perfect thank you really" I he said putting on the bracelet she gave me on."But I don't have anything for you"
"You already made my Christmas day much better" she said with a bright smile after I said that I like her gift.
After that day we made a tradition to meet every Christmas night and eat some food or smoke some joints.
It didn't matter if we were spending the night with the pogues or if Kie was with her family, we'd find time to do our own little tradition.
A few weeks after, Kie introduced us to Pope, this time I didn't have such a hard time to let Pope in our group. I didn't knew if it was cause of maturity, John B would laugh if I'd say this, or if it was cause the last time this happend Kie turned out to be really cool.
"JJ?" I heard Kiara's voice, snapping me out of my thoughts.
I turned to look at her and noticed that she was still searching towards the burned funiture.
"Yeah?" I asked.
"Where are we gonna go?" she asked, sitting down on what was left of the pull out couch.
I stayed silent for a while.
I didn't know if what I was gonna say next was gonna be a good idea or no.
"Maybe we could go to my place?" I asked, turning to look at her and trying to guess her reaction from the way her expression would change.
She looked at me a little surprised, probably not expecting me to actually suggest her to go at my house, but then just nodded.
I never invited anyone inside my house but now my dad was nowhere around so there wasn't any danger and it wasn't like we had any other option.
On the way towards my house we didn't talk again and neither of us tried to start a conversation.
"Wait here" I said when we finally got in front of my house.
I pushed the window a little and got inside so I could open her the door from inside.
Before that I stopped to take some empty cans and bottles from the floor and throw them in the trash then I hurried to open the door for her.
Kie was waiting in the same spot she did before I got inside. She got in but again I couldn't read any expression from her face which worried me even more but I didn't say anything.
"Are you hungry?" I asked and instantly wanted to punch myself.
What the hell was I even gonna get her to eat? I didn't have any food.
"No I'm good" she said which made me relax a little.
"Come on, you can sleep in my room" I said leading her towards my room. "It's not much but the bed is more comfortable than it looks"
"We slept on sand for a whole month, I'm sure it's more than perfect" Kie said, giving him a small smile.
I turned around and started looking in my drawer for some clothes to give her and for myself. I took an old shirt and shorts for me and found my pelican marina shirt she once said she liked, which luckily wasn't having any holes in it and was clean and found a pair of shorts that might fit her.
"If you need me I'll be on the couch" I said, handing her the shirt.
"You're not staying?" she asked her expression finally changing but I didn't like it.
"If you want me to I can stay" I said and she just nodded, no more expressions again.
"I'm gonna go close the window again and I'll be back" I said, closing the door after me and giving her some privacy.
I made sure the door and windows were closed again and stopped to look if I had any food I could give her, I only found some cereals that didn't seem to taste too bad, they might work for tomorrow.
I slowly knocked on the door before opening it, letting Kie know that I'm coming in.
When I opened the door I saw her standing on the edge of the bed, dressed in my clothes.
I tried my best to not let this have an effect on me, which was pointless, and moved to seat on the other side of the bed. My bed was kind of small but somehow we did fit in perfectly.
"How do you feel?" I suddenly asked, catching Kie's attention.
"Better that I'm here with you now" she said, moving closer to me so now she was sitting between my arms.
One of my hands moved towards her face, slowly making her to look at me and kissed her. I still didn't belive I could do that so easily now. I'd never get bored of this.
How could I anyway?