"Are you fucking stupid?" Cartman spits, knocking himself out of Kyle's grasp.
Kyle tries to hold him back as Cartman walks over to me, fuming. I stand my ground, not giving him the satisfaction of reacting. He bucks Kyle off and points a finger in my face.
"We had her, she was over!" He rages. "Why the fuck would you throw that away? You've fucked us, me!" He turns around to the boys and holds his arms out.
"She fucked us, everyone."
I roll my eyes.
"Actually— I think she did the right thing." Tolkien hugs his arm and looks away from me.
I smile at him, and he catches my eye for just a moment.
"Agreed." Kyle crosses his arms.
He smiles at me and I return it. I watch as his face reddens slightly and chuckle under my breath.
"Mmh". Kenny nods. He winks at me, I return it gracefully.
"We had our opening! Are we really going to walk the halls with that monster in three weeks?" Cartman scoffs. "Fuck. You, new kid".
"Cartman"-
"I agree with Cartman!" Clyde yells from the back.
I widen my eyes at him.
"N-not the 'fuck you' part of course- well, I mean"- he sighs. "Why did you do that? Is what I mean." He walks up to the front, looking me in the eyes.
I sigh and look to the floor, trying to find the words. I turn to Cartman and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Thank you, for your help, Eric."
"You're not welcome"-
I shut him up as I wrap my arms around him, forcing him into a hug he can't escape. I feel him freeze under me, and when I pull away he's beet red.
I turn to the others.
"Thank you all." I giggle.
They all look at me, mouths agape and speechless.
"I realized in there, that if I punish her— because I'm bitter and mad— I'm no better then her." I sigh again.
"I am better".
Clyde walks up to me, he looks at me for a long moment— sad and flashing his puppy dog eyes.
He throws his arms around me and sobs into my shoulder. I hold him the same and place one hand on his head.
"That was beautiful". He sniffles.
"Jesus, Clyde". The boys roll their eyes at him.
"Get ahold of yourself, dude". Craig mumbles.
I giggle at him, and pat his back in comfort. He pulls away and looks at me again— I smile. He hugs me again and the boys have to force him off me.
____________________
After things have subsided, the boys and I walk out of the school. The setting sun looks more beautiful today then ever, as it shines down on me, washing everything away. The birds chirp in the trees and I smile to myself.
I'm free...
"H-hey Newbie". Jimmy looks over to me.
"Yeah?"
"What's r-r-red and bad for y-your teeth?"
I chuckle at him.
"What?" I ask confused.
"W-w-what's r-red and bad for your t-teeth?"
"Hmm, I'm stumped." I shrug.
"A b-brick".
I shake my head at him and chuckle at the stupid joke. He really never fails to put a smile on my face.
He looks at me for a moment.
"You s-should s-s-smile m-more". He flashes his teeth, smiling playful. "Looks g-good on y-you".
I look over him for a second, taking in his compliment. I smile brighter and this time, for the first time in a while— it's real.
I hug him, grateful. Filled with many emotions. I feel my eyes start to tear up and I know what's coming. The flood gates are opening. I pull away with a sigh, and sniffle. Brushing the bottom of my nose.
"I'll s-see you." He waves me goodbye and I notice team Craig walking off together.
"I'm glad you're okay." Craig pats my shoulder. "I like having you around— sometimes". He smiles.
I scoff at him.
"You love me."
He only shrugs, and I roll my eyes, playful.
"Bye boys!" I wave to them, yelling.
They each turn around to me and wave back, in their own different yet special ways. My cheeks burn from the emotions written on my face as I turn to my group.
Cartman sighs and puts his hands on his hips.
"You're not that bad new kid". He looks down.
I laugh as he crosses his arms at me, and I raise my hand to him. He returns my handshake and we truce, unspoken. For real this time.
"Thanks, Kyle". I say, still looking at Cartman.
"Yup." He nods, monotoned.
Cartman rolls his eyes.
"Whatever, I'm sure you'll find a reason to be annoying again, chicks always are".
" 'Shh', don't ruin the moment." I whisper to him, teasing.
"Boy, am I glad that's over!" Butter wipes his forehead.
"You didn't even do anything". Stan looks over.
"Well, sure— but I was worried!" He looks over to me and smiles.
I return it and pat his shoulder.
"Thank you."
"Anything for a friend!"
"Dude, fuck this. I'm going home". Cartman points at the path that leads to his house and begins to walk off.
"Stan, you're with me". He says, pulling him along by the arm. His voice is rough and threatening, and I wonder why?
Butters follows them, tailing behind him just a little.
I raise my brow at them, but wave them goodbye anyway.
I turn to look over at the boys remaining and pull them into a group hug.
"We fucking did it!" I jump up and down.
Kyle and Kenny chuckle at me, as I pull away.
"I'll see you later tonight, princess." Kenny whispers to me.
"Tonight?" I blink.
He only winks at me and I realize what he's implying.
"Kenny!" I punch his arm, lightly. Face red, and on fire.
He just chuckles and walks off, hood back on.
"Mmhmm mhhmh!" (Stan is a lucky man!)
I'm so embarrassed, I could cry.
I sigh and look at Kyle, he's looking back at me— it's quite for a while. Something about his gaze, fond and soft, it makes me begin to crack. Someone can only be strong for so long. I look to the floor as I feel my body heavy beneath me. Pain flickers through my head, legs and shoulders while my feet give way underneath me. I feel like gravity has suddenly doubled and I fall to my knees. I sob into my hands.
I feel Kyle's hands around me as he picks me up to my feet.
"I know." He whispers over and over as he pulls me in, and runs his hands through my hair.
"I know."
I feel safe with him, warm. Like I can let go. Maybe it's everything we've been through— but I feel closer with everyone.
Like I can really call them my friends, my best friends.
Maybe, I'll be okay in South Park.
_______________________
We make it back to my house, after one excruciating walk home. My body burns and aches, but somehow- I feel lighter then I have in a while. I decide I don't necessarily want to be alone right now, as I've been alone all week. So I ask him to stay, as I push through. Letting him take care of me, even though I told him not to.
He gets me ice for my head and some of the leftover medication from Clyde's surprise visit, that seems like years ago now.
"You should sleep". He tells me, a worried look on his face.
"But"-
"I'll stay with you, until you fall asleep, don't worry". Kyle smiles at me.
I sigh, pouting at him back.
"It's six o'clock".
"You're exhausted".
"I'm not".
He looks at me, completely over my arguing as he sits on my bed.
"Just try".
"Five minutes". I cross my arms.
"Sure." He whispers.
I throw myself back in bed and close my eyes tight, huffing, annoyed.
I feel his hands reach over to play with my hair just as he did so many nights ago, when Wendy first got to me. It's comforting, and I wonder if he can really see through me that simple. That clear. Maybe I should let him?
I sigh again, this time soft and content— as the world falls away from me. Out of my grasp.
=====
She's asleep in less then three minutes, it's almost laughable how hard she fought me about it. I tuck some of her hair behind her ears and she stirs a little in her sleep. My chest burns as I cup her cheek.
I feel awful, like I was hit by a truck. She's been through so much, in such a short period of time.
I think she's starting to let me in though, at least I hope so. I want to know her, really know. I want all of the parts to her mind, body and soul. My heart flutters in my chest as I lean down to her. I place my lips on her forehead, ever so softly— like she could break under me.
"Sweet dreams, Yekiratì."
____________________
I collect myself, and my things before leaving her room. I want to stay, I could look at her all day, but I shouldn't. Something about the way my heart flips in my chest when she's around, tells me dangers lie ahead. And something burns in my stomach, like I'm forgetting something.
My phone buzzes in my pocket as I close the front door and walk out into the driveway. I pick it up, and see a message from Cartman.
Eric: We're killing Stan, get over here now.
=====