Me: I'm here
I wait outside in the cold, dark night. Standing at Craig's door, as he runs down to let me in. I hadn't opted for a jacket, though looking back I should have. I shiver as the cold nips at my skin, breath coming out in translucent clouds in front of me.
The sun had gone down a while ago by now, and as I stand by the door, I hear symphonies of crickets and critters running through the night. It's late, but I don't mind. I can't sleep anymore anyway, even if I wanted to.
Craig opens the door, and I stand to look at him. I wave, kind smile written on my features. He waves back at me as we exchange in silent greetings. He puts his figure to his mouth, signaling me to be quiet before I step in the house. I nod my head at him and he leads me inside, silently pulling me up the stairs and into his room. He quietly shuts the door and we both sigh in relief, happy in the safety of his room. He locks the door, as I look around.
His walls are dark blue, Navy. He's got a few posters on the wall of NASA, and a couple about some television show I've never heard of. His bed is pushed up against the corner, with the window next to it. As I look to the ceiling something catches my eye. Craig has star stickers all over the ceiling just above his bed. There's a lot of them, and I can't help but think that's kind of cute. He falls asleep every night to the stars, like me, just a little different. He catches me staring and shakes his head at me.
"Sorry, I know their childish". He says.
"No! It's cute! How long have they been up there?"
"My whole life.."
I look at him as he looks back up, reminiscing about his life, and how many experiences he's had under those stars.
He looks down to me, soft and neutral, before gently shutting the lights off. I look at him confused as he looks back up, nodding his head at the stickers. I turn around slowly as the stars light up the whole room. They glow in the dark, neon green, sparking on the roof and bouncing off the walls. I gasp as I take in the sight. I feel Craig walk up, standing next to me as we gaze at each other. I can't help but notice how the lights reflect deep into his dark blue, almost black eyes. His expression is plain, but his eyes smile at me so small I almost don't see it. Their expressive and loud, and the deeper I look, the deeper I understand him. I'm no longer met with the stoic, sarcastic man I thought he was. But instead, I see him— expressive and deeply observant.
"It's so pretty". I tell him softly.
He smiles at me quite and small, but before I can't really take in the rare sight he turns around, flicking the lights back on. They burn my eyes a little as I squint, moment over.
He tells me to sit tight while he grabs his telescope. So I sit on the end of his bed while he sets it up near the window. He lets me take the first look, I sit on the floor and put my eyes up to it. I close one eye and stare through it, looking for anything. My eyes land on the moon, it's big and bright. So clear I can see every bump and color rippled within it. It's beautiful and I can't help but gawk at it. There's so many things going on out there. I thought I was close before, I'm basically on top of it now. It's a sight to be hold. Something I'll remember for the rest of my life.
I look over to him, speechless, my eyes wide.
"Amazing, huh?" He asks.
"So much more..." I stutter out.
We sit like that, cross legged on the floor, taking turns looking and pointing things out to the other. We talk about everything and nothing. Laughing about it all. Well, I'm laughing, he carries his signature blank expression, but I know in my heart he's having a good time. It'a peaceful, calm I feel more relaxed with him, then I have in a while. Something about his energy is calming, he's a good listener, and I wonder if he's done this before.
I don't know how much time has passed, but I know I'm sitting on his floor so long my legs go numb. Pins and needles threaten my legs as I slowly stretch them out.
I like it here, I decide.
He asks me about Wendy, what happened, and I find myself compelled to tell him everything. He stares at me intently, through hooded eyes as he sits while I spill my guts, out onto the floor and into reality. I tell him my thoughts, my feelings, that stupid voice in my head no one knows about and I don't know why. He puts a hand on my shoulder.
"It'll be alright". He says. Calm and quiet, but so deeply sincere it takes me a second to recover.
"I- don't know why I just said all that—sorry". I look down, embarrassed.
"Because I asked." He tells me, like it's the easiest question he's ever had to answer. Like nothings ever been more obvious, or right.
I smile at him.
"Wanna meet Stripe"?
________________________
He walks me down to the basement. We tip toe down the stairs as quietly as we can. If his parents found us— in this hour of morning — it wouldn't be good. He helps me down the steep, squeaky steps with his arm and I can't help but notice how caring he is. How in tune with others emotions he can be. I wonder if he's always been like that, or if it's something he had to learn.
We walk up to a mid size cage on the floor. With a wooden in capsule, play pen around it. There's a piece of paper taped lazily to the side of the whole thing with the word: "Stripe" on it. I realize now, Stripe is a little Guinea pig Craig has a sincere attachment to.
Craig bends down, getting on his knees and looks at me. I get down with him as he opens the cage and pulls out the cutest little rodent ever. Craig has a soft smile on his face as he holds him, ever so gently.
"Do you want to hold him?"
"Yes, please!"
He hands the Guinea pig to me and I cradle him in my arms. Petting his soft fur coat sweetly.
=====
I watch her as she hold Stripe in her arms. Her smile is bright and warm as she pets him with care. She looks up and me and her smile only grows. Grinning from ear to ear.
"He's so cute! Oh my god, so soft!" She squeals.
I can't help but stare at her, as she holds my most prized possession in her hands. I don't usually let people hold him, let alone see him. I did once, with someone I cared about but it ended badly. In fact, I don't ever really talk to people anymore. I guess, something about her makes me want to. Something about her makes me want to know more. I can't explain it.
I watch as she places him in the play pen, Stripe runs around happily and then back in her hands.
"He likes you." I tell her.
"I like him". She giggles. "You're so lucky".
I think for a moment before speaking.
".. Yes, I really am.."
I feel myself smiling, I hope she can feel it too.
=====
I yawn in my hands as I give stripe back to Craig. He gently places him in his cage, and I see him burrow down in his bed. He really is the cutest.
"You're tired". Craig looks at me.
"A little.." I scratch the back of my neck.
"Come on". He grabs my hand and helps me back up the stairs.
As we get back into the living room grey light fills the space through the blinds. The sun is rising, and I realize I've been up all night. With Craig. He doesn't even look tired. Or maybe he is, I can't decipher his facial expression. It's blank again.
"Shit, we have school today". I complain. Face palming.
"We have a couple hours, don't worry." He tells me.
"I should probably go, before my mom notices I'm gone."
He nods at me and walks me to the door. Once I'm outside it, I'm hit in the face with the cold morning breeze. The grass is dewy, and the white snow matches the white clouds in the sky. The suns peaking through the clouds ever so slightly, trying as hard as it can to be seen. But the forecast is to heavy.
Shit, it better not snow.
I turn back to Craig ready to say goodbye, but he's not looking at me. He's looking at the sky, like he's deciding on something.
"Craig?"
"Wait here". He runs up the stairs out of my sight, and I'm left confused as I wait. Freezing.
Beauty is pain, I suppose.
He runs back down with something in his hands. I recognize it's a blue sweatshirt, it's thick and looks incredible warm.
He hands it to me silently, and I question him.
"It's going to snow". He says lamely.
"But, this is yours!" I tell him. "I'd feel bad".
"Don't, doesn't fit me anymore anyways. Keep it".
I smile at him and I throw the warm hoodie on. I sigh contently as I feel my body warm up slightly. It's a little big, but it's not terrible looking. It's warm, that's all I care about.
"Thank you". I start. "For everything".
He nods at me and smirks.
"I'll see you later, newbie".
"Bye, Craig".
With that he shuts the door, and I'm left alone on his front lawn, incredibly warm, and comfortable.
I start my walk home, looking back to his window one last time. I smile and shake my head.
Warm.