EPILOGUE
Four Years Later
Remington POV
The soft hum of the engine was making me tired, but I was excited to make another trip to Atlanta. It was a stunning late April day and watching the bright blue sky with soft clouds breezing by made me glad we chose to take this surprise adventure.
Especially since Alice and I have such good news to share with Ben and Daisy.
The last few years have given us dozens of memories at the farmhouse, from our beautiful wedding at golden hour over three years ago to all the teens that came through our doors for a safe haven.
We relished the final few months at Lissy's rental house, spending a cozy Christmas snuggled by the fireplace watching classic movies as well as some home videos from both our families. There were stockings for Peach and Yoshi hanging on the mantle as well, filled with tennis balls and treats that the pups adored while Alice, Ben, and I laughed at their joy.
Now the farmhouse walls were full of new photos showcasing Rob and Jesse with gigantic salmon they smoked at their house, Kenny holding one of their baby girls with Leah snuggling Eli, and Trent with his new puppy that they adopted to give Oreo a best buddy. Somehow Alice found a way to graft the photos of our past with those of our present.
We somehow created a home full of love and understanding for those that needed it... and I couldn't be happier.
My data research job shifted when I decided to branch out with my own company. Ben had a couple of high school buddies that were amazing at computer coding and tech support so they were working as paid interns while I took on clients and worked out of my home office. Now I had the chance to work my own hours, taking on more projects on our farm in my workshop as well as helping coach high school baseball alongside Taylor.
I smiled to myself when I noticed Alice shift slightly in her seat across from me, head tilted toward the window of the train car against a hooded sweatshirt.
She looked so peaceful while resting her eyes, long hair tied up in a high mess of curls. It had been a hot spring and we spent as much time as we could outside in our vegetable garden or working on the outbuildings on the farm like my workshop. Lissy loved having heirloom tomatoes and zucchini growing and was trying her hand at some fruit trees as well this year.
I kept myself occupied, updating our front porch swing so it was larger and creating a handmade dining room table with chairs and a bench.
My newest project was almost completed, and just needed one more coat of stain.
A cradle... for our baby girl.
We had our sex reveal ultrasound yesterday and decided to make a surprise trip to the city so we could visit the kids, as we called them, and share our news. They knew about the pregnancy and everyone celebrated along with us but now that we had new photos to share Lissy couldn't wait to sneak down and make sure Uncle Beep could coo over our daughter.
Ben and Daisy lived in different dorm buildings but attended the same college, with Ben's childhood best friend Jason as his roommate while Daisy had a single room by choice. She kept busy working at the coffee shop on campus and caused a massive stir whenever she added a new pastry to the menu. Doc regaled us with pride in how well she was doing in her studies, and Leah was thrilled to have help at the local humane society whenever Daisy was home for breaks.
She was like a little sister, fitting perfectly in our found family.
Of course Ben was one of the first to try any of her new recipes and still spent as much time as he could with all the pups when they were in town. He was still using the grill and smoker every visit and had taken a shine to woodworking, crafting a desk for Daisy's last birthday that made her cry.
My brother was focused on baseball and his sports medicine degree, deciding to hold off on a job and instead take a bigger course load. Dad's will left him with more than enough to cover college so he decided to make the most of the freedom that allowed him. He supported Daisy in her choice to work and step out on her own, even though she didn't have to, and was able to give Jason a hand financially as well thanks to his savings.
Working at Seb's for a couple years in high school proved his strong work ethic and gave him plenty of savings. He also made the conscious choice to keep using our old baseball gloves and the bike he brought when they moved to Tulip Tree, instead of splurging on new items.
We were proud of his diligence and frugal perspective. Ben and Alice had the ability to know how to use their resources to help as many people as possible.
It's one of the things I loved most about them- their giving hearts.
"Remi?" Lissy's soft voice asked with a yawn, "Can you pass me the water bottle?"
I grinned, reaching into my backpack and handing her our Hydroflask. She gave a happy sigh after taking a long drink, stretching lightly in her seat across from me.
My heart still skips a beat when I see her smile. Those green eyes catch me off guard every single day. I still don't know how I got so lucky to be her husband, but seeing her wiggle around to get comfortable in the train seat reminded me of those first glances we shared about five years ago.
"Did you have a good cat nap?" I asked, taking the water bottle back and getting a drink as well.
She chuckled, hands resting on her stomach as the baby bump was showing proudly. "This little lady has been growing fast so my body must be screaming for more sleep. This train ride is so smooth, too... it's hard not to doze off."
"I still can't believe it's a girl," I sighed happily. "I don't care either way and whatever this baby chooses for their identity will be amazing but knowing just makes it feel so much more real."
"It wasn't real when you saw the dozen positive pregnancy tests I had spread on the bathroom counter when you got home from Saturday breakfast with the guys?" Lissy gave a giggle, shaking her head at the memory. I laughed and nodded, admitting she was right.
It was a good point.
I still met with Jesse, Rob, Kenny, and Taylor every week that we were able plus we added a couple new buddies that were parents of Ben and Daisy's friends. Doc also met an amazing man that was an incredible addition to the crew, and a wonderful father figure for Daisy.
Lissy had been sick for about a week but we had tried a new restaurant and just assumed something didn't agree with her.
When I walked in the screen door and hollered that I was home, she let me know she was upstairs. I followed her voice to the master bathroom, where she sat shellshocked on the ledge of the tub... then noticed all the positive tests.
We had chosen to just let things happen as naturally as possible, not actively trying but also not avoiding the possibility. The joy on my face shook her from her frozen state, and when I fell to my knees in front of the woman I loved all I could say was, "You're going to be an incredible mother."
Her eyes were full of tears as she leaned in and kissed me softly, letting out a laugh as she replied, "It doesn't seem real... but I'm sure it will soon."
After a blood test and Doctor appointment it was confirmed and we were able to tell Daisy, Ben, and Doc about a week later when the kids came to visit.
Alice got Benji a "Favorite Uncle" shirt. His face shifted from shock to excitement to shock again before he wrapped his sister into a hug, whispering, "I'm so excited to watch you guys become parents. You did a damn good job with me, if I do say so myself."
Same cocky sense of humor as always. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I leaned forward in my seat and pressed my hand gently on Lissy's stomach, lacing our fingers together. My Little lamb's eyes drifted toward our joined hands and she gave me another smile. "Beep won't know how to handle it when sees us. I know Daisy is working the afternoon shift and he texted earlier that he was excited she was making eclairs so he will most likely be visiting at some point. I'm sure the surprise will go off without a hitch."
"I'm glad we booked the hotel near campus so we can just enjoy the spring weather and walk around the park nearby." I added, remembering previous visits where we tried different Air BNB's or hotels before finding the perfect location that gave us the chance to skip getting an Uber or using Benji's car.
My Dad's old car...
When he turned sixteen we let him learn how to work on the car with some friends from town, and he and Daisy decided to drive to school so they had the chance to come home whenever they had a long weekend free. It was a really long trip but they took turns driving and studying so it worked out well. We trusted their judgment and knew he was also able to give friends a ride to the store or appointments as needed so it gave him the chance to help others more than anything else.
Alice's phone buzzed and she smirked, looking at the screen. "Trisha just texted that she got accepted into the Fashion Academy in New York." Her eyes were shining as she continued, "I'm so proud of her for staying home for her first year to take general education courses online while debating which design school fit her best. I know Bec was hesitant about her little girl moving so far away but they'll find reasons to visit often."
Trisha took on a full time job as a waitress at Seb's after starting as a dishwasher with Ben in high school. It was tough work but Taylor and Becca were incredibly proud of how hard she worked to save for her dreams. They were able to support her some as well, but Trisha was adamant that she could save her money living at home for a year while getting a few classes out of the way while deciding the right path.
"I know Trent will miss his sister, but he starts high school next year and will love going to the Statue of Liberty as well as all the museums. Plus I know Taylor has been prepping him to be a Mets fan so we can have some friendly rivalry between our families," I laughed, enjoying the sound of my wife's chuckle while her sapphire ring sparkled next to my platinum wedding band.
For better or worse.... And we have thankfully had a lot of better in the years since we met. There were still tough times and difficult discussions, but our bond was stronger than ever while we put in the work to continue healing.
The train ride smoothly curved around the mountain and I let out a long breath, trying to calm my nerves. We were still a bit anxious traveling this way but agreed it was helpful to reclaim even something as traumatic as train rides. Facing our fears had become a common occurrence, but I knew as long as she was by my side we would be okay.
It was also the easiest way to get to Atlanta and gave us time to relax together. Alice was still working part time with forestry doing field research and had helped discover a number of new flower and moss types in the national park. She hoped to continue after our baby was born but was limiting herself to about ten or fifteen hours a week in five hour shifts so she could balance living her dream with helping expand the farm and spend time with our little one.
I sat back in my seat and looked around the train car again, reflecting on how much my life has changed in the last five years.
Gone are the empty days of blaming myself for how my brother died or wishing I had spent more time with my Dad. Now I held onto happy memories and knew to continue trying my best instead of living in the lonely past.
Once in awhile I would take some time by the pond, visiting with Reese in a way and updating him on our family. Telling him about our little brother and how proud he would be of what an incredible shortstop and outfielder he had become. Gushing about my beautiful wife and how she continues to find new ways to show me her love.
Talking to my first best friend as though he was still here, feeling his presence at the place where he lost his life. Sometimes the breeze would blow and I would almost hear his voice, the same way Alice does with Clara once in awhile.
Like a Northern Star, giving me motivation and direction while guiding my paths.
Lissy would join me sometimes but knew I needed to do some things on my own. She loved sharing memories of her Daddy and Clara as well as talking about how much they would love the life we have built. She knew her Dad would be jumping in on all the projects we always had around the farm, especially with the baseball diamond that was still used by the high school as well as the adult league we started about a year ago.
It was Jesse's idea and after a little research we scrounged up enough people to make four teams. Alice was the main pitcher for our team, while Daisy still took the mound when she was home in the summer for a younger team created by the college kids after they graduated from the high school team.
Trent was the ballboy and Leah was usually wrangling Eli and his little sisters while helping Bec with concessions. Homemade baked goods and cold drinks were always available at low prices for the teams and their guests.
It was a perfect way to spend warm summer days before taking a dip in the pond, laughing as we cooled off from the Georgia sunshine. There was a local ice cream truck that would even visit when we had games so his business skyrockets on those days.
Rob had the idea to name the teams after animals and we made the most of the idea, choosing Sloths for our team mascot while Daisy and Ben's team proudly decided to be the Penguins. We enjoyed the competition and my only regret was that our pitcher was benched this season due to her pregnancy.
"Should we get Thai for dinner or are you more in the mood to grab some Birria tacos once Daisy is off work?" I asked, knowing full well which Liss would choose.
My wife may love trying new cuisine, but this pregnancy has made her crave Mexican food daily. She was constantly making quesadillas or tacos from leftovers and we had a steady stream of avocados used for guacamole or crema to accompany her meals. I got accustomed to this new diet and did not mind one bit, though once in awhile I insisted we order Seb's or let Benji run the grill.
She rolled her eyes, "Remi, you know as well as I do that we will be grabbing Birria on the way back to the hotel with Daisy and Ben and Jason in tow, having a feast in our room while we watch something on ESPN or Netflix." Alice gave me a grin, "I know it's a Wednesday so they won't be able to stay late thanks to morning classes but at least the guys will walk Daisy to her dorm and we can see them again tomorrow afternoon before Ben's evening lecture."
"How long should we stay? We have the hotel room for two nights but could extend through the weekend if we wanted to..." I offered, knowing based on their class schedules that it would be tough to get much time with Ben until the weekend.
She missed him desperately but was so proud of how hard he was working as well as the compassion he showed to those around him. Having Jason back in his life was also a huge blessing. Alice and I made road trips a couple times a year with Ben to visit before he started college which was a perfect way to continue growing friendships even though they lived so far apart. Daisy came along a couple times, getting to know his childhood friends as well as the city before they moved for college.
Alice gave me a soft smile, yawning again as she grabbed her phone and typed furiously. "I just asked Leah if she was okay keeping Peach and Yoshi til Monday. I offered to take the kids next week for an extra day in exchange so I have a feeling..." she paused as her phone buzzed then laughed, "Yep. She's more than happy to keep the pups. I'll just have Eli and the girls on Tuesday and Thursday most likely to give her a break since I work on Wednesday and Friday out in the field."
"How is she feeling now?" I asked, offering a smile. Kenny let us know they were expecting their fourth right after we discovered we had a baby on the way so it was exciting for them to share this experience together.
"Exhausted like I am. It's too funny that our due dates are less than two weeks apart. She got a head start on us but I'm excited for our kids to grow up together." Lissy rubbed her stomach lovingly and murmured, "Baby girl, you are already so deeply loved... so many aunts and uncles and cousins in our chosen family that can't wait to meet you."
My heart soared at the radiance my wife showed, that pregnancy glow apparent from the beginning of this adventure.
I thought back over Ben's high school years and all the pizza nights and board game competitions we enjoyed, laughter filling the house while we carved out the life Alice and I had always dreamed of. He never caused any trouble and if anything prevented other kids from creating issues by offering a safe space for them without worrying about alcohol or drugs.
Maybe some of the kids considered him a geek or nerd, but being an athlete and great student more than made up for that. Ben never lacked for attention from girls but naturally only ever had eyes for his Daisy.
Now we had even more joy to share. A new life to watch become their own person.
"What's on your mind, baby?" she asked, reaching forward to wrap my wrist with her hand.
I chuckled at the reflexive movement and immediately began triangle breathing along with her, emotion overwhelming me as I considered how to respond.
"I guess... I just never knew I could have this kind of life... a brother that is giving college his everything, friends we can watch grow and blossom in their personal and professional lives, and now a precious baby on the way..." My eyes locked with hers and I offered a soft smile, "Lissy, my life is so much happier than I deserve. You've brought me so much joy that sometimes I can't contain it."
My wife gave me one of her brilliant grins and shook her head. "Oh, no, Remington... you have worked hard to heal and grow so that we can have this life. The joy we now feel would not be possible if we hadn't done the work to make it through everything that came our way." She paused, reaching forward to cup my cheek. "I'm glad I share your initial with my monogram now, but can't imagine anything different. We were inevitable, as soon as we locked eyes from across that train years ago."
Her words sank in and I nodded, soaking in the kind observation and her allusion to the song "Someone to Watch Over Me."
The first item I ever bought for the baby was a stuffed lamb. Alice cried when I brought it home, cuddling the soft toy before placing it on her dresser, lovingly staring at the toy while we both dreamed of the little one we were so excited to bring into the world.
She sat up with an excited expression and looked out the window. "We will be getting to the station soon. It's the home stretch before we arrive in Atlanta."
Not home... even though both of us called this town home for years of our lives. It was a funny shift, the first visit we made together with Ben back when he had fall break his freshman year. We visited their old neighborhood and saw their friends as well as some favorite spots from Ben's childhood but none of it felt the same.
It's also not home to Ben or Daisy. They insist that while college is a great experience, they much prefer relaxing in Tulip Tree over the fast paced chaos of the big city.
I agreed completely and could not imagine ever going back to the bachelor pad with occasional nights out drinking with coworkers that didn't even know I liked baseball.
We built something special starting with a tragedy and the trauma of that train wreck.
Two lives, never meant to collide, suddenly thrust into one another's lives at the perfect moment.
While we still grieved the loss of life from that wreck as well as the family members that had passed away, we knew that life was worth living. That we could find happiness even on a lazy day relaxing on the porch swing while we both read and enjoyed the breeze.
Alice and Benji helped me see that there was life out there that I could experience, painting my greyscale world with that kaleidoscope of color.
It was like in "The Wizard of Oz," when Dorothy arrived over the rainbow and saw brilliant shades instead of black and white.
Life would continue to give us tough times, but as I stared at my wife while she watched out the train window I knew we would find a path forward. Everything is lighter at her side, and while we loved our trips to visit Atlanta I also knew it would be a relief to get back to the farmhouse.
Be it ever so humble, there truly is no place like home.
THE END
Author's Note
Thank you again for being part of this journey. I'm considering ideas for bonus chapters at some point but for now this book is complete.
I have an idea to do a sequel that focuses on moments in Benji and Daisy's lives through high school and beyond, but have no set time frame for when that book may happen.
Your love, encouragement, and support mean the world to me.
Love you all,
Lizzy