Xavier
Her deep brown eyes are all I can think of.
Why does she have to be so protective of Wednesday?
She doesn't mean it. She's just upset. I have to tell myself to keep my sanity.
She was my everything. She was the sun and the moon and all the stars in the whole universe.
I could never love anyone like I love her.
I've loved her since the day I met her.
I loved her even before that.
I have loved her since the day I was born.
I was born to meet Inez. To be a part of her life, even if it was only for a few months.
For me, our love was bigger than just a high school relationship.
It was more than just that.
At least it was for me.
It was bigger than the whole sky and all of its contents.
I have to fight the urge to turn back and run after her.
I kept looking back, checking if she was looking, but she never was.
When I had finally built up the courage to chase her, she had already disappeared into the trees.
This fight wasn't like our others.
I could barely even call this a fight.
This felt like I had been stabbed in the heart thousands of times.
My heart ached for her.
Just being in the same room as Inez was healing in of itself.
I pity every person on the planet who hasn't known Inez Fallon.
I was lucky.
I was one of the few thousands in 8 billion people to cross paths with her.
Let alone get to know her romantically.
I have so many regrets. I could have dialed down my protectiveness. I shouldn't have stopped her. I should have just gone with her instead.
Because of my stupidity, I just lost the one person in the whole world that ever filled the void in my heart.
The worst part about our fight was the way she spoke to me.
She wasn't angry in any way. Her voice was soothing as always, while delivering some of the most heart stopping words that ever pierced my ears.
She loves me. Those were the only words I never thought I would be upset to hear from her mouth.
Her loving me was a different type of love.
I feel like an open wound, one that will never heal.
Saying goodbye to her is unimaginable. Unbearable.
Her love is beautiful like her, worth celebrating if you are ever blessed with a glimpse of it.
I have to build up strength to text Ajax.
It's hard to do anything when all I want is her.
Ajax agrees to meet up in my dorm, which doesn't excite me like normal.
Once I reach my dorm, I just stare at the wall. The same wall Inez once rested her head against.
I turn to look away, not wanting the reminder of my breaking heart.
Looking to my desk, I remember her resting her head on my shoulder, watching me draw on the same wooden desk only months ago.
Looking to my bed, I remember the times we spent watching movies together and throwing popcorn at Rowan as he slept.
Everything reminds me of her.
Even the pencils in my backpack are a reminder of her.
Shutting my eyes, I wait for Ajax to arrive.
"Hey. You okay?" He says, slowly creaking my door open.
"Inez and I. We're done. For good this time."
I feel like I'm giving up on us right now.
Saying the words out loud makes me feel like I'm betraying myself, everything only becoming real at this moment.
"I'm sorry Xav." He pats my back trying to comfort me.
Ajax was my best friend. Other than Inez. But I guess now I can't call her that anymore.
We didn't have a Nightshades meeting tonight, so I went down to the library to try to find out about the monster.
I had already looked through every page of every book in the library in hopes to find more about the monster, for Inez's sake.
Since then, it had just became a habit to recheck everything. Maybe I missed a book?
Hearing the stone door open, I quickly hide behind a pillar and stay silent, unsure of who the person was.
Inez
Our love was tragic. It was never meant to be.
Xavier was better than I could ever be. It was sad, honestly.
He was a masterpiece, just as anything that he creates with his paintbrush.
It hurt to know that this was goodbye.
My sister was the only thing keeping me grounded right now.
Without her, I would definitely be spiraling.
Protecting Wednesday and Xavier is my top priority.
I will never stop looking out for them.
If I am going to die, I want to live with no regrets, and be remembered. I don't want to be forgotten like my father, not having anyone show up to my funeral. I want to be someone people look up to. I want to change someone's life for the better for a change.
I don't discuss Xavier and I's fight with Wednesday, knowing she would also scold my outings to the woods.
She senses something's off, but doesn't mention it, which I appreciate.
"Let's go. Uncle Fester said to meet in the library." Wednesday says, motioning for me and Thing to follow.
What's wrong? Thing signs while Wednesday isn't looking.
"Tell you later." I whisper, making Wednesday turn to me.
"What was that?" She asks, leaning closer.
"Nothing." I fake a smile.
Scooping up Thing and placing him in my backpack, Wednesday and I rush downstairs to avoid our dorm monitors.
The stone door feels like it takes an eternity to open, giving me enough time to take Thing out my bag and onto my shoulder.
"Uncle Fester?" I call out, searching the empty library.
"Who's uncle Fester?" My heart aches to the voice.
"What are you doing here?" Wednesday asks.
"We'll since I'm an actual nightshade I don't need to explain myself." His face is full of sorrow, dark circles already forming underneath his eyes.
I love him so much that it pains me to even look at him.
"We're investigating the monster." I somehow manage to say.
"Trust me, you won't find anything in here. I've already looked a million times." He says, now avoiding my eyes.
"How convenient for you." Wednesday mumbles, making me nudge her in annoyance.
We both know that Xavier isn't the monster. She just doesn't want to give up her case.
"Stop Wednesday. He's-" I say, but get cut off soon after by another voice.
"Inez. Don't. I don't need you to defend me. Thank you, though. Your sister doesn't know what her problem is." Xavier says, making me turn away from him.
"Enlighten me." Wednesday says, annoyed.
"You don't know who your friends are. I've been by your side since day one. I believed your theory's when nobody else did-" Xavier's voice fades as I stare at the wall.
The both of them just acted like I wasn't there, so why not actually not be there. If they were just going to ignore me, I didn't want to waste my time with their conversations.
"Because for whatever reason that I cannot fathom, you seem to like me." Wednesday's words break me from my trance.
She did not just go there.
"What's to like?" Xavier brushes past me, leaving the library in seconds.
She did. and he didn't deny it.
I scoff, stepping away from Wednesday silently.
"How long have you been lurking?" Wednesday asks, her voice paired with a pair of heavy footsteps.
"Long enough to feel the tension between you two. Yowza!" Fester says to Wednesday as I walk up the stairs.
"Where are you going?" Wednesday asks in confusion.
"Anywhere but here." I say, annoyed.
"Wait!" Wednesday says, making me stop in my tracks.
"We still need Thing." She says, making my eye twitch uncontrollably.
"Of course." I say, lightly placing Thing on the stairs as I angrily escape that stupid library.
Wednesday already had Tyler. Why did she think that she needed Xavier wrapped around her finger too?
Everything was falling apart.
Sometimes, it feels like I protect her while she puts me in harms way intentionally. She can't seriously think that I wouldn't be upset by her liking Xavier. Does she even like him? Or does she just like the idea of hurting me through him?
I hate that I would still die for her right now, even after what she just implied.
I thought sisters were supposed to stick up for each other. Especially twin sisters.
Guess Wednesday never got the memo.
authors note:
sorry I had a few problems publishing
love you guy so so so much🫶🫶