"Crash-"
In the bathroom late at night, the sound of water sounded.
Fu Chenyu's hands were flushed red in the cold water, but he rubbed his fingers desperately as if he had no feeling.
The boy's face was pale, there was no shame and surprise of growing into an adult, only endless fear.
In the dream, Ji Mian's face kept changing and appearing in front of his eyes. Fu Chenyu was startled and looked up at the mirror. In the mirror, there were only his bloodshot eyes that had not yet subsided.
After a long while, he suddenly felt that his appearance was very disgusting.
"Whoa-"
There was another sound of water, and Fu Chenyu suddenly splashed cold water on his face.
It was already late autumn in November, and the cold water stimulated him to wake up a bit. Fu Chenyu held the white tiles in his hands, and it took him a long time to calm down.
When he got back to the bedroom, he had changed into clean trousers and sheets.
Sitting in front of the computer, Fu Chenyu skillfully searched the Internet for three words: homosexuality.
No matter how ignorant he is, under the influence of jokes of various colors from his peers, he also knows that it is normal for boys to be interested in girls.
However, he had a desire for Ji Mian, and had unwanted thoughts about his playmates from childhood to adulthood.
He thought that his love for Ji Mian was very simple, and now this simple feeling is being unbridled by black lust.
The seeds buried deep in Fu Chenyu's heart seemed to be gradually sprouting, and the vague emotions of his childhood gradually took shape, and he realized that his possessiveness towards Ji Mian was far more than that.
In the 2000s, domestic search engines treated homosexuality relatively conservatively. Some asked themselves whether they were gay or not, and some parents asked whether their children were gay, but there was no effective suggestion.
More voices show "perverted", "abnormal", "this is a treatable disease".
Fu Chenyu read it silently, and went to the foreign website without hesitation.
The attitude towards homosexuality abroad is much looser, but it still shows that this is not a kind of love that can be recognized by most people.
This road is destined to be difficult and destined to be alone.
Fu Chenyu sat in front of the computer for a long time, as if he had become a statue for a long time.
He didn't turn off the computer and lay back on the bed until there was a cheerful chirping of birds outside the window and Tianfang's fish belly rose.
That night, the thirteen-year-old boy, carrying bitter secrets and almost hopeless love, stayed up all night.
The first year of Ji Mian's junior high school was uneventful, and in a blink of an eye it was the end of the year.
I don't know if it was his delusion, but this semester, Fu Chenyu seemed to have a cold attitude towards himself. Every time he took the initiative to invite Fu Chenyu to go with him after school, or to play basketball on the playground, he was rejected by Fu Chenyu for various reasons.
Sometimes he even ignores him.
If it wasn't for the things we experienced together in elementary school, Ji Mian would have thought that Fu Chenyu hated him.
Because of Fu Chenyu's estrangement, Ji Mian felt a little gloomy, and even Lin Minzhi noticed that he was depressed.
Lin Minzhi thought that Ji Mian was worried about the final exam. After all, this was the final exam of the first semester of the first year of junior high school. It was related to the placement of the second class and whether she could stay in the experimental class. She also advised Ji Mian to take the exam easily and not be too nervous.
Ji Mian listened absent-mindedly, while Lin Minzhi looked at her son who was growing up and had some concerns in her heart.
I don't know... Has Mianmian experienced some puberty development...
Lin Minzhi has been paying attention to Ji Mian's growth over the past year.
He also quietly looked at Ji Mian's clothes basket. He didn't get up in the middle of the night to change the dirty clothes, nor did he change the sheets.
My son is... a little late in development?
Lin Minzhi was very worried. I heard that boys who grow up late are prone to not grow taller. Ji Weiguo and her are not very tall. What if they grow too short after Mianmian and can't get a wife?
Her worry might have really paid off. The day before the final exam, Ji Mian suffered from insomnia for the first time.
He went to bed at twelve o'clock and woke up at three o'clock in the middle of the night, his pants were sticky, and he knew what it was without looking at it. Ji Mian's face turned red in embarrassment.
After traveling once, I didn't expect to experience adolescence again... what!
His already snow-white skin turned red from his neck to his face, like a boiled shrimp.
Ji Mian hurriedly changed his pajamas and sheets, and hid in the bathroom in the middle of the night to wash. The next morning, Lin Minzhi saw the changed sheets hanging on the balcony.
She didn't say anything, just added an extra egg to her breakfast, wishing Ji Mian to finally grow into an adult on this day!
Although Ji Mian was embarrassed and ashamed about becoming an adult, he still performed well in the exam the next day.
The nine subjects were tested for two days in total, and after the last subject was completed the next day, I had to go to the class to lead the winter vacation homework.
The class was very lively, and the most discussed was the newly opened ice skating rink near the school. Everyone discussed going on vacation to play.
While packing up her homework, He Xi invited Ji Mian: "Ji Mian, can you skate? Let's go together, it's only ten yuan an hour."
Ji Mian was a little moved. He glanced at Fu Chenyu subconsciously, wondering if he should ask Fu Chenyu to play with him.
Fu Chenyu hadn't paid much attention to himself for more than a month, so he suddenly left Ji Mian in the cold, leaving Ji Mian confused and uncomfortable at the same time.
Find an excuse to repair the relationship.
He Xi went to invite Su Luoyu: "Su Su, are you going?"
Su Luoyu is very handsome now. Unlike Ji Mian's gorgeous appearance, he looks very cold and indifferent: "When? Fu Chenyu, are you going?"
He invited Fu Chenyu by the way.
Ji Mian's heart skipped a beat and turned to look.
Fu Chenyu took his eyes back from the playground, and before he could answer, a few girls suddenly stood at the door, looking at their classroom with blushing faces.
Not a first-year student, but looks like a second-year senior.
"Fu Chenyu, I'm looking for you!"
A roar in the classroom immediately attracted everyone's attention.
A few girls crowded the girl with the face of the melon seed in the front. The face of the melon seed was flushed, and she whispered softly, "Fu Chenyu, can you come out for a while?"
Ji Mian was taken aback for a moment, thinking, this posture, this is the rhythm of confession!
He grew up with Fu Chenyu, and he has seen many girls who have a good impression on Fu Chenyu, but very few have the courage to confess to this cool guy with an ice cube face.
Ji Mian suddenly felt a sense of watching his child grow up. He was inexplicably relieved and a little proud. Look, the boss is really popular, even more popular than the protagonist Shou!
He was quietly partial, and felt that Su Luoyu's vision was really not good, how could he like Li Jue? Is the boss not affectionate enough and rich enough?
Li Jue said that he loved Su Luoyu, but also found a substitute like Su Luoyu, a proper scumbag...
Thinking of this, Ji Mian realized that he was the cannon fodder substitute, and the smile on his face instantly stiffened.
Ji Mian wanted to gossip for a while, but the girl had already taken the boss away, so he could only regretfully retract his stretched neck.
Su Luoyu suddenly said, "Ji Mian, are you interested?"
Ji Mian and Su Luoyu were half childhood sweethearts. They grew up, but he didn't have a deep friendship with Su Luoyu.
But I usually chat like this now.
"It's okay." Ji Mian said, "I just think it's too early to fall in love."
Su Luoyu's eyes were slightly startled, and she suddenly said, "Ji Mian, do you have someone you like?"
Ji Mian's heart suddenly became vigilant. This familiar opening remark has something to say... Could it be that the protagonist Shou is already in love?
He suddenly remembered that in the original novel "Stranger Things", Su Luoyu should be staying at a friend's house at this time, and this friend was Su Luoyu's childhood Bai Yueguang, Li Weishi.
It is said that he died very early, so all the men who fell in love with the protagonist later became jealous of Li Weishi's weight in Su Luoyu's heart!
However, why did Su Luoyu share this with herself!
Ji Mian silently complained: The rhythm of this girl's embrace of spring is not suitable for sharing with a straight man like me...
"No." Ji Mian shook his head,
"I'm still a student, and students should focus on their studies."
While he was talking, he faintly felt a little bit of advice to Su Luoyu. After all, in the original book, Su Luoyu and Li Jue both seemed to be in love with each other. When they talked about love, they were tossing and destroying the world. Friends around them took off three layers of their love. Skin.
Not to mention his cannon fodder stand-in, his life was lost by the two of them.
Su Luoyu sighed faintly, looking preoccupied.
The next second, he cheered up: "Ji Mian, my birthday is coming soon. Would you like to come to my house to celebrate my birthday?"
Ji Mian's first reaction was to refuse, but He Xi answered faster than him: "Susu, why didn't you invite me?"
Su Luoyu smiled and said, "Please, definitely please, as well as Fu Chenyu, Kang Jun, they all come, I like the fun."
It wasn't that I invited myself to be alone...
Phew, Ji Mian let out a sigh of relief and readily agreed.
Hanging in the classmates of the protagonist Shou, that is an ordinary passerby! Not special.
And rejecting the protagonist's words seems too deliberate. The best way is to maintain a close relationship with him and become an ordinary classmate.
Well, be careful, be careful with your life!
Fu Chenyu came back soon, He Xi had the heart to gossip, but because of the indifference of the boss who refused to leave people thousands of miles away, he shivered and retracted his head.
Ji Mian said softly, "Fu Chenyu, what is your sister looking for from you?"
Fu Chenyu raised his eyes and saw Ji Mian's face, the feeling of guilt and disgust for himself instantly churned in his heart.
It's been a month, and he still can't forget how he felt that night, the first time he felt dirty.
Facing Ji Mian's clean eyes, Fu Chenyu almost fled, not even daring to look at each other.
"She confessed." Fu Chenyu said briefly.
Ji Mian's eyes were round and round, as long as he was surprised when he was young, he was exactly like the cotton rabbit raised by Fu Chenyu.
"Then did you agree?"
"No."
Cold and light, still hanging on to him.
Ji Mian sighed, "Actually, I think that senior is pretty."
Fu Chenyu didn't speak. Hearing Ji Mian's answer, he held his breath in his heart, panicked, as if he couldn't stand it any longer, and squeezed out a word from his mouth: "Do you like this type?"
Ji Mian shook his head, "I'm just expressing my appreciation for beautiful girls. After all, there's no boy who doesn't like to watch..."
Halfway through his words, he was speechless, and quickly shut up.
Ji Mian suddenly remembered that Fu Chenyu was the man who didn't like looking at beautiful women!
He is the soulful villain male No. 2 in tanmei novels!
Although he didn't speak, he understood what Ji Mian meant.
Fu Chenyu closed his eyes coldly and tasted a sour taste.
Yes, Ji Mian likes girls.
Su Luoyu's birthday is January 17th, and Ji Mian picked out a pen in the gift shop for him.
When paying, Ji Mian saw a fountain pen with a fox cap on the counter, and he immediately remembered that Fu Chenyu had a little fox pendant that looked the same.
Fu Chenyu was still arguing with him. He wanted to buy a pen for him and make up with him.
On January 17th, Ji Mian came to the bay area by bicycle.
It was the first time he came to Su Luoyu's house, and he was a little nervous.
I heard from my grandmother that Su Luoyu's parents divorced when he was in elementary school. He was sentenced to Yang Chaoying and now lives in Li Weishi's house.
Li Weishi is Su Luoyu's childhood Bai Yueguang. It is said that he is a piano teacher. He used to take good care of Su Luoyu when he was in the Children's Palace. After coming and going, the two became good teachers and good friends.
However, Su Luoyu, who was at a low point in his life at that time, was brought home by Li Weishi and lived together under the same roof. The kindness of giving charcoal in the snow gradually changed qualitatively in his heart. As Su Luoyu grew older, his love for Li Weishi gradually changed. Aroused admiration.
When I asked Ji Mian if he liked someone that day, he was probably worried about the young man who had just started falling in love.
Of course, Ji Mian knew all of this through the original novel.
When Ji Mian arrived, all of Su Luoyu's friends arrived.
The protagonist, Shou, naturally communicates widely and has many friends. In addition to one class, there are also acquaintances from the interest class.
The appearance of Ji Mian surprised everyone at the scene a little. After all, his appearance is also very high. If he is not compared with Fu Chenyu, he is also a handsome guy!
"To you, happy birthday." Ji Mian gave the gift generously.
"Thank you." Su Luoyu whispered thanks, he looked very happy today.
After Ji Mian gave the gift, he pretended to be a stranger who didn't exist. He sat on the sofa and watched other people lively without saying a word.
His eyes searched for Fu Chenyu's shadow, but he couldn't find it.
Ji Mian was a little disappointed, and he held the fox water pen tightly in his pocket.
It's also true that the big guy doesn't look like a person who will come to someone else's birthday party, not to mention, this is still the home of a rival!
"Susu, are all your friends here?"
In the kitchen, a young man in his twenties came out, tall and handsome, with a pair of passionate peach eyes.
Ji Mian didn't have to guess to know that this must be Li Weishi. Generally, the handsome men in the novels have something to do with Su Luoyu.
He looked curiously at Li Weizhi and thought to himself, is this the soul male protagonist of "The Tenderness of a Stranger"?
The man who ran through the whole text and made all the supporting actors grit their teeth with hatred?
She looks really good, but unfortunately she didn't live long and passed away early.
And Li Weishi seemed to have noticed Ji Mian too.
His gaze stayed on Ji Mian's face for a few seconds, and then returned him a gentle smile.
Ji Mian looked away: ... The protagonist received the white moonlight, I better not make eye contact with him, lest I die quickly.
Under the command of Li Weishi, Su Luoyu cut the cake and sang the birthday song with everyone.
The snacks on the table were eaten up, Ji Mian drank two cups of coconut milk, his stomach was a little bloated, and he wanted to go to the bathroom.
When he came out of the bathroom, Li Weishi was flipping through the photo album. Others were chatty and lively, and there were many topics. Even the junior high school students had a common language. Just a few words made everyone admire him.
Ji Mian was stunned and thought, as expected of Bai Yueguang that the protagonist received, this configuration is top-notch!
Li Weishi was showing Su Luoyu's childhood photos to everyone, Ji Mian found a place not far away and sat down, followed by a few pictures.
After flipping through one, and taking another, Su Luoyu's face was already red: "Brother Li!"
Li Weishi smiled and said, "You were so cute when you were a child, so you can't be seen."
Saying that, he opened the album, but this album was different from the previous one. In addition to the photos of Su Luoyu, there were also some old photos of Li Weishi himself.
Junior high school, high school, college, and work.
He Xi looked at it and suddenly pointed to a photo and said, "Brother Li, who is this?"
Ji Mian looked at them and saw a pair of brothers in the photo. They looked a bit alike. The older brother was Li Weishi and the younger brother was a primary school student.
He instinctively didn't like the primary school student next to Li Weishi. Although that person didn't grow up, there was already a arrogant and evil spirit between his brows, and he looked disgusting.
Li Weishi smiled and said, "Oh, this is my younger brother. Li Jue, like you, is also in the first year of junior high this year."
As soon as he finished speaking, Ji Mian's head was blank, buzzing, as if someone had hit him with a hammer, and in an instant, he couldn't hear any sound.
For a moment, Ji Mian hoped that he had heard it wrong.
His face was instantly as white as the ash on the wall, his heart was beating violently, and his body was shaking uncontrollably.
Strictly... Strictly...
Li Weishi turned out to be Li Jue's brother!
Li Jue's name was like a whisper of a demon, and just hearing it made Ji Mian's whole body shiver.
I don't know if it was an illusion, but after so many years, Ji Mian's suffocation on the verge of death reappeared. His eyes were black, and fragments like fragments kept flashing in his mind, followed by the icy cold sea water. The arrogant and handsome face appeared in front of him, he and Su Luoyu were in pairs, hugging each other tightly, with the happiness of the rest of their lives on their faces.
In the kidnapping planned by Fu Chenyu, Li Jue chose to rescue Su Luoyu and gave up on him.
He was deeply betrayed and abandoned by his lover, and the despair and pain in his heart almost made Ji Mian fall to the ground.
"Ji Mian? Ji Mian..." He Xi spread out her five fingers and shook it in front of his eyes, worried: "Are you feeling unwell?"
Ji Mian regained his senses, and found that his entire body was paralyzed. He opened his mouth to speak, only to hear his hoarse voice terrifyingly: "I'm fine."
He Xi wondered: "Is it really all right? Are you sweating a lot?"
Ji Mian waved weakly: "It's alright, I'm a little low blood sugar, I'll just go out for a walk."
He didn't want to stay in this room for a moment, and Su Luoyu's existence always reminded him that he might not have escaped from the plot in the book after all these years.
Ji Mian felt that he was almost out of breath, as if being caught by a certain fate, and as soon as he ran downstairs, he retched at the trash can.
He vomited up the food he ate just now, and Ji Mian's stomach throbbed in pain, and his pale, paper-white cheeks were covered with fine sweat.
After Ji Mian vomited, he rested for a few minutes, bought a bottle of water to rinse his mouth in a trance, and walked aimlessly on the street.
After a long time, he slowly calmed down, and his heartbeat gradually stabilized.
Just now, he was too flustered.
Because there was no preparation at all, the moment he heard Li Jue's name, a series of terrifying reactions appeared due to stress.
Ji Mian pinched the bridge of his nose with his hand and sighed.
Although the plot of "Stranger Tenderness" would unfold in his mind from time to time, Ji Mian didn't notice some details that needed to be scrutinized.
Li Weishi and Li Jue both had the same surname, so he should have suspected it earlier.
Unexpectedly, the Bai Yueguang that Su Luoyu liked turned out to be Li Jue's own brother. I have to say that the two brothers are indeed similar in appearance. Ji Mian suddenly realized that after Li Weishi passed away, Su Luoyu used Li Jue as a stand-in?
He was stunned, amused by his own thoughts.
If it is really what I guessed, then the life and death love between Su Luoyu and Li Jue is quite plastic.
Both of them said that they loved each other the most, but one took the other as a stand-in, and the other found a stand-in for the other.
Just remembering that he was the cannon fodder stand-in between the two of them made Ji Mian really unhappy.
He walked in the direction of the setting sun, and unknowingly came to the community where Fu Chenyu's house was.
Lin Jianyi is now firmly in the No. 2 position in Tongcheng. The community they live in is naturally a community house allocated by the state. They are all cadres above the department level and are guarded by security guards.
Ji Mian didn't know why he came here. He thought that when he was flustered, he would walk home and escape to the safe haven that Lin Minzhi created for him.
Probably because there was still a fox fountain pen in the pocket that was not sent out.
It may also be because... I want to see Fu Chenyu.
He wanted to see him and to confirm whether this Fu Chenyu was his Fu Chenyu.
He grew up with him, is his best friend, has experienced snow disasters and SARS together, and is a good buddy who has a "friend of life and death" relationship.
Not that... Fox, who had the most gentle smile on his face, but could shoot and break his calf without hesitation.
On impulse, Ji Mian regretted it a little.
Because he couldn't get into Fu Chenyu's house at all, he could only wander downstairs.
During the third lap, Ji Mian heard Fu Chenyu's indifferent voice: "What are you doing here?"
Ji Mian turned his head and saw Fu Chenyu's appearance in the sunset.
His shadow was drawn long, and his face was familiar and cold.
"Fu Chenyu..." Ji Mian was exhausted at this moment, his nose was sore, and tears came up immediately.
Fu Chenyu was frightened by this change and was a little uneasy, but his little face still tensed up the character of Cool Brother, but his tone softened a little: "Well."
Ji Mian almost burst into tears in shame. He quickly swallowed his tears and took out the fox fountain pen from his pocket: "I bought a pen for you."
Fu Chenyu's fingers curled up.
Ji Mian's nasal voice was very heavy, and his voice revealed a deep sense of grievance, as if there was still a trace of fear and fear, he begged softly: "Fu Chenyu, don't ignore me."
Don't ignore me, don't be him.
Fu Chenyu's heart of stone, which had been cold for a month, collapsed amidst the grievances of the young man, and he couldn't even fight after the collapse.