The bell rings
to represent the end of English class.
There's only astronomy left
before lunch starts.
My English
is still very rusty,
and I often slur each of the words
as they combine like chemicals
to form some sort of
explosive and incompatible result.
But,
I can hear it
very well.
As I walk to the door
the teacher calls my name.
"Yes?"
I walk over to her desk.
"Bring these papers to the front office for me.
I'll write you an excuse for your next class."
She hands me
three papers.
Two of them are stapled,
and the one on top looks like
some sort of form.
"Okay."
She soon hands me
a small filled out pass.
"Thank you."
I bow
then leave the classroom
The hallways are full
of people walking back and forth.
The office is at a dead end
so that students wouldn't keep disturbing
the people inside.
At least,
that's what I like to think
the reasoning of it is.
The people in the office
never talk to me.
I just set the papers on the front desk,
they give me a look,
and then I leave.
The hallways are empty now,
which I much prefer,
as I can finally have some
time to think.
My birthday is in two days.
Nobody but me,
my family,
my old friends,
and Yoongi
know that.
This is the first time in a while
that I've been excited for my birthday.
I still want to do something for Yoongi
but I don't know what.
It just has to be special.
Like him.
"Taehyung!
Some friends you've got there, huh?"
I stop walking and
blink out of my mind
only to see Sanghoon
standing there again.
I furrow my eyebrows.
"Shouldn't you be in class?"
"Who cares that deeply about biology?"
Sanghoon rolls his eyes.
"Well,
except you maybe."
"You know you can get in
a lot of trouble for skipping
if I just go to the front office,
right?"
"I have a pass though."
Sanghoon waves the paper around.
"Technically,
I'm going to the bathroom."
I sigh and
continue walking.
"Wait, TaeTae!
I have one thing I've gotta show you!"
I turn around again.
Sanghoon's suddenly
much closer to me.
"Just let me go to class,
Sang-"
He pushes me
and my back hits a wall,
his hands
wrapped around mine.
I try to move my wrists,
but they're stuck like glue.
For the first time
in such a long time
I stare at someone
with biological anger
instead of psychological.*
"Let go of me."
Sanghoon lets out a chuckle.
"Calm down, Tiger.
I thought this would make you feel
more in your element.
Get it?"
He sees me not react
and rolls his eyes
with a snarky grin;
the kind that makes you
slightly furrow your eyebrows.
"No one can see us, anyways.
No reason to feel so upset."
"You may think I'm blind,
but I can see you very well."
Sanghoon turns his head to look behind himself.
A few seconds pass,
then he lets go of one of my arms
and yanks the other one
so I'm no longer against the wall.
Sanghoon's nails
dig into the skin
of my wrist.
This all feels like fiction.
Seeing Yoongi standing there
staring at Sanghoon.
It's almost like
I'm dreaming.
I decide not to try
and get him to let me go,
because that'll only
give me scratches.
"Oh.
Well would you look at that!"
Sanghoon laughs.
"The superhero's finally arrived
to save the poor damsel in distress."
"He's not a damsel.
He can fend for himself."
Sanghoon looks at me.
"Really?
Then show me."
I stand still
and stare at him.
If I'm being honest,
I have no idea
how to fend for myself.
But it seems that
risking the damage on my skin
and pulling my hand out of his
somehow worked,
even though it
hurt my shoulder a little.
I back away
and hold onto
my screaming wrist.
Sanghoon laughs.
"You guys are so weird."
I decide to finally
take my shot.
"At least we aren't dumb
and think that people like getting held against walls
by someone they hardly know.
I recommend you stop by the office
and ask them to enroll you into psychology instead."
Yoongi grabs my hand,
and I can see
a small smile on his face.
"Let's go."
Sanghoon sighs.
"How romantic.
I wouldn't have guessed Taehyung would've ever gotten a boyfriend.
And be careful!
I don't want you guys to get a disease
when you're doing stuff at home,
okay boys?"
His voice gets quieter
as Yoongi leads me to class.
I pick up my pace
and let go of his hand.
"Oh.
Sorry.
I forgot that made you uncomfortable."
I glance at him
only to see him staring at the wall
on his left,
away from me.
Slowly,
I wrap my hand around his again.
Yoongi raises his eyebrows
then looks at me.
"It's okay.
That doesn't make me uncomfortable anymore."
I smile,
and soon enough
Yoongi smiles back
and squeezes my hand.
~~~~
* Biology and psychology have "kind of" different definitions for the term 'Anger.'
[So that you don't get misinformed, anger is both biological and psychological. Biology is the study/science of life, aka the body structure. Psychology is the study/science of the brain, aka the behavior and emotions of people.]
Anger in biology is the fight or flight response someone experiences, which causes the adrenal glands to make stress hormones that rush through the body (hormones aren't just the things that wanna start the process of meiosis). It makes you physically aggressive.
(Sources: mentalhelp.net, betterhealth.gov)
Yes, anger is also caused by a flight or fight response. It isn't just fear and anxiety. If it was only those two, what would the "fight" response be there for?
(Fun fact: The proper name for these hormones is catecholamine.)
Anger in psychology is the emotional reaction to injustice or an idea that goes against your own. It is the antagonistic view of someone or something that you think has done you wrong.
(Sources: American Psychological Association, Austrailian Psychological Society)
It activates the amygdala, which is the part of the brain that manages emotions like anger (duh), fear, and anxiety. It also activates the orbital frontal cortex, which is what helps control anger in healthy individuals (people with something like depression, for instance, do not get the orbital frontal cortex to activate when they're angry, which is why they are more prone to lashing out).
(Source: Harvard University)
I did not mean to ramble. My bad.