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They don't deserve you.
I tried to scream but my head was underwater.
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Word Count: 3351
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My eyes snapped open as I sat up quickly, I wasn't at home. I was in a different room, I looked next to me seeing Eddie passed out as we were on the couch. We had ordered pizza and watched some movies waiting for my parents to get home. I got up quickly looking at the clock in the kitchen, reading eleven.
"Shit, Eddie!" I called as I ran back to the couch to shake him. "Eddie wake up!" He jolted up looking startled.
"Shit, what time is it?" He asked yawning rubbing his face as he streched.
"Eleven! I have to get home." His eyes widened as he cursed to himself.
"Shit this is bad, people will think I kidnapped you!" He nearly shouted. We rushed out of the trailer to his van. He had started it and backed out before I had my seat belt on.
"No I can clear things up, I'm sorry." I tell him.
"For what?" He asked as he drove.
"Falling asleep? I don't know." I shrugged my shoulders.
"Its fine, you didn't do anything. I had a good time, you're pretty good at guitar. Not as good as me, but you'll get there." He laughed.
"Oh sure, I'm not bad. I'm amazing." I corrected as I joked.
"Shit." He muttered as we approached my house. There sat on the front porch Steve and Billy, they both looked to the head lights coming and stood up fast.
"Listen I'll get out and you just go, I'll see you tomorrow at lunch?" I asked as we pulled up.
"Yeah, bye. Be careful." He called after me as I shut the door, he sped off fast.
"What the fuck!" They said at the same time as I walked to the front porch.
"I fell asleep, I meant to be home at eight." I tell them both as I walk to the porch.
"You slept with him!" Billy shouted making me turn around to slap him in the face. He stood shocked for a moment at what I did.
"I fell asleep on the couch! I didn't touch him. Leave him alone, unlike you he didn't leave me alone to sit in a lunchroom full of people laughing at me." I went off.
"Listen can we talk?" Steve asked.
"Get the fuck out of here Harrington, unless you want beat." Billy growled at him.
"How about you both leave." I say as I walk into the house.
"Rosearia! Where have you been!" My mother and father rushed to me with worried faces.
"I went to a friend's and fell asleep. I had forgotten my house keys at school, and I just went with him. I'm sorry I should have called." I say
"You should be, worrying us like that. You two didn't know where she was?" My father asked. He obviously didn't know they were both camping on the front porch.
"No sir, we stayed here to get her safe back home." Steve says defending himself.
"Dad, mom, I'm tired. I'm fine, I was at a friend's. Please let's just go to bed." I tried to calm the situation.
"I'm not going to calm down when my pregnant daughter is out late." My dad yelled.
"Jerry, let's go to bed. She's home safe, it's fine." My mom roller her eyes at him.
"You two, I should kill you both." My dad growled before walking up the stairs infront of my mom to their room.
"Lets talk." Billy says calmly.
"I'm not in the mood, we're tired. Go home Billy." I say. "Or go to the blondes house, I bet she was wishing you'd rail her." I scoffed.
"Listen for the baby I'll let you sleep tonight. But I expect to talk tomorrow. I'm taking you to the appointment after school tomorrow. Goodnight." He said pissed off before he glarred hard at Steve and walked out the door.
"You too." I say to him as I head to the kitchen for a snack.
"Its not that I don't want a baby, I'm scared. What if the gate isn't closed, what if something bad happens and I lose you both?" He questioned as I raided the fridge finding hummus and snap peas. I ignore him as I stand at the counter and eat a little. "I lost you once and I can't take that again."
"Leave." I say simply as I pop another snap pea in my mouth.
"Please look at me, tell me you don't love me." He begged. I turn to face him, his soft eyes looking back at me pleading. His hair was a mess and I liked it like that.
"Both of you are doing fucked up shit to me. You both wanna be here, both want me, but both go off with a different girl. I don't need that, we don't need that." I say to him as I turned back to my snack.
"Nancy and I talked, we're just friends. Nothing more. We will stop seeing each other, I'll ignore her completely for you!" He says to me.
"God damn it, Steve. You both make me wish I never came back. I can't decide between the two, you guys can't compete either." I say flustered. Suddenly I had dropped my peas and I got sad about it.
"Hey its okay, I can be patient. I just needed you to know I want to do this." He says trying to calm me down as I cry.
"Shut up, I'm crying because my peas fell." I began to get on the floor and pick them up, he bent down and assisted as he chuckled.
"Baby girl, it's okay. We can find another snack?" He suggested.
"I want peas." I say as I tried getting up. "Help me." I wined like a baby. I hate being pregnant. He took me by the hands and helped me to my feet.
"Come on let's get you in bed, you need sleep." He says.
"I do love you, but hearing you say you didnt want kids hurt me." I say as I wiped away the tears. He pulled me along to the stairs and up to my room.
"I do want you both, I fucking love you." He says as he shut the door behind us. He pulled me into his arms as his head rested on mine. "Do you honestly see me with a baby?" He chuckled.
"No, but someone's the dad." I said sadly.
"Look at me baby, I'll be here. I mean I did the work, only right thing to do is own up to it." He says. He looked down at me, the dim light room making him look so hot. He starred at me like he was thinking about sexual things, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't too.
"God stop looking at me like that." I say pushing him away.
"Like what?" He asked confused with his arms out like he had no idea. His eyes looked sultry at me.
"Like that damn it, I'm too sad. Now im conflicted because I want to rip your clothes off." I say frustraited as I turn around to find things to sleep in.
"You wanna rip my clothes off?" He chuckled as he came up behind me, he brushed my hair to the side before placing a soft kiss to my neck.
"Don't tempt me, I'm tired." I moaned a little.
"Billy is starring at us through the damn window." He growled a little as he kissed down my neck, his hands snaking around me to my breast massaging over my shirt. My head leaned back on his shoulder, the intense feelings he's giving me driving me mad.
"What?" I asked.
"Billy is pretending he isn't watch us, but I see him starring over here. I should fuck you right infront of the window." I couldn't help my laugh of nervousness. Because although that sounds hot to me, I don't need that fight to happen.
"No sex infront of Billy." I moaned a bit as he sucked my neck again.
"Okay, let's close this shall we." He playfully smiled before going to close the curtain.
"No sex, as hot as you look right now. I'm tired." I say to him.
"No sex. That's fine. Let me help you change." He says softly as he gently takes the buttons to my shirt and unbuttoned them slowly. As soon as my belly was exposed he held it with both hands before kissing my lips softly, I gave in to him of course. I'm weak.
"I love you, Steve." I say quietly. I barely heard it myself.
"I'm not leaving you." He says as his hands go to my pants now unbuttoning them and helping me out of them. "You're beautiful pregnant, did you know that?" He asked as he admired my body. "Bra off." He says reaching behind my to unhook it as he starred down at me smirking.
"I know your thoughts, you're not smooth Harrington." I giggle. As my bra falls to the floor he just starred at me, I suddenly became uncomfortable.
"My god, not one girl has anything on you." He whispers. He grabbed my nightgown and helped put it over my head and dress me.
"I'm not a child." I laughed tiredly.
"Just practicing. Get in the bed." I didn't hesitate, I climbed right in and laid down.
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I don't remember what had happened after my head hit the pillow last night. All I know is I woke up wrapped in Steve's arms. I laid there for a second inhaling the cologne he had worn yesterday that still lingered on him. I tried to get up softly without waking him but with a beach ball belly it's a bit tough.
"Trouble?" He asked in his morning voice.
"I have to pee, and it's hard getting up when I'm fat now." I tell him.
"You're carrying my angel in there, you're not fat." He huffed as he sat up.
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After I had gotten ready for school, and made myself presentable I made my way down stairs. I felt my stomach drop as I see Billy and Steve both having breakfast with my parents. They were oddly getting along and all laughing together.
"Morning, honey. I got you a plate ready." My mom said. But as I sat down and looked at everybody then at my plate I felt nauseous. I gagged.
"I can't." I gagged again. "I'm sorry." I rushed up from the table to the half bathroom to throw up.
"Baby you okay?" Steve asked rushing into the bathroom.
"Fine." I inhail deeply as the vomiting stopped and I flushed the toilet. "They told my this sickness would stop after my first trimester." I say out of breath.
"Here you go sweetie." My mom came up behind Steve and handed me a glass to get water from the sink. After I rinsed my mouth out I noticed nearly everybody but my dad was watching me.
"Can you guys leave me alone I'm fine!" I scoff pushing past them. "Do you know what happened to my bag?" I asked the boys.
"In my car." Steve told me.
"Your mom reminded me of the appointment today at 3:30pm." Billy smiled at me. It's weird having the guys act normal around each other.
"I'm sorry I can't make it honey, I'll be at work again. Me and your father are working as much as we can so we can help you too." She tells me. "Just an FYI, an apartment has opened up, uptown. I looked into it, $275 a month." She says as she cleaned the kitchen up a little bit.
"I'll be sure to go apply, Ms. Walker." Billy tells her.
"Wait you're moving in with him?" Steve asked me dumbfounded.
"Of course she is, she's settling down for her family. What you both should be doing, till we all know. Man the hell up you two, bye dear. Be home by ten at least." My father says before grabbing his keys and leaving the house.
"I packed you a lunch, Billy told me you didn't eat the school's lunch. I packed some carrots and hummus, and a sandwich, a little extra in there too. Have a great day please! Boys protect her." My mom handed me a lunchbox before she left the house.
"You're moving in with him?" Steve asked again.
"Yeah, I am actually. You had Nancy." I tell him as we all three stand in the kitchen.
"Oh please, don't act like I didn't see you both fucking last night." Billy scoffed.
"Wait we didn't do that!" I defended.
"Oh like the girl behind the bleachers yesterday? Oh shit, Rosearia didn't know. At lunch remember big boy?" Steve smirked crossing his arms. Billy's face dropped before he lunged at him throwing a punch.
As they fought the only thing in my head was about the girl being the bleachers at lunch. Is that where he went? If he didn't why did he get mad over that, he didn't even say anything back to him about it.
"God damn it stop! NO!" I shouted so loud from the depths of my throat it came out raspy. They both pulled apart and looked at me, a bit sweaty and worked up. Billy's split lip was bleeding a little again, and Steve's hair was wrecked along with a now black eyes.
"After all that shit about wanting to be a family, loving me, getting a place and shit... you fucked the blonde at lunch when you knew I was waiting for you?" I asked hurt.
"No! I didn't fuck anybody but you!" Billy's eyebrows raised instantly. I felt as if he was lying to me.
"Can not one of you be loyal, what the fuck. You both need to grow the fuck up, I don't want either of you." My voice is now worn and raspy as I make my way to the front door.
"You're not walking!" Billy says following me out the door.
"No shit I'm 5 months pregnant! Steve get in the car." I say. He opened the passenger side to his car before walking to his side. I watched Billy race to his car and follow us to school. The ride was silent. "Why am I never enough?" I asked in a breathy voice as we pull into school. "Like what did Nancy have that I didnt?" Tears threatened to spill over.
"I fucked up I admit that, she's nothing like you." I rolled my eyes.
"I have a choice too, I think adoption might be the best for this baby. I'm not ready for a baby, and I'm sure as hell not raising a baby with one of you." I tell him.
"Please don't do that." He pleaded as he parked and looked over at me. I unbuckled my belt and got out of the car.
"I think my decision has been made." I lied to him. I opened his back seat grabbing my bag before leaving him struggle as his seat belt jammed. He finally got out as I was nearing the school. Billy leaning on his car watching me walk into the school.
"Eddie!" I shouted making him turn around to look at me. Dustin and Mike stood with him at his locker looking between us oddly.
"Rosearia, nice to see you again." He smiled at me.
"Hey I have a favor to ask." I say with a sweet innocent look.
"Since when did you two talk?" Dustin asked confused.
"Yesterday, I sort of spent the night in a way." I giggled.
"No way, does Steve know?" Mike asked getting an elbow in the ribs from Eddie. "Ouch."
"The favor?" Eddie asked.
"I find out the gender today, and I got into it with the guys. I just don't have a ride because Steve drove me. Do you think if I give you gas money you can take me?" I asked looking up at him as I rest a hand on my belly. He smiled at me and gave the boys a look, which they found weird by their reaction.
"I can do that. Promise I won't be beat by your boy toy?" He teased laughing.
"If he touches you tell me, I have a good punch." I laughed back.
"Deal, you don't have to give me money. Just a hug." I smiled as I threw my arms around his waist, he engulfed me in a hug.
"What are you doing with my girl, freak?" Billy's voice rang.
"Not your girl." I say breaking from the hug. "Hes comforting me since you fucked the blonde at lunch yesterday." I snap at him making him grind his teeth. He smelt of cigarettes so he must have just smoked. "Thats what I though." I say as he shook his head walking away, his fist clenched.
"Hes going to kill you." Dustin said nodding his head as if he's talking to himself in there.
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"Has Steve even looked for you?" Eddie asked as we ate in the music room.
"He tried to, every time I seen him I hid." I giggled as I ate my carrots.
"You're going to get me killed for sure." He says smiling popping a chip in his mouth.
"Can I tell you a secret?" I asked, he nodded quietly looking at me with a concentrated face. "I've looked into families to give the baby to. I know my parents would help but what life is that? I can't do this alone, Eddie. Not when I'm cheated on, lied to, manipulated. Giving the baby up seems like the best option. I thought to myself I would never to that because as much as it's painful I love being pregnant and was so excited at one point to hold little bean... but since coming back to Hawkins I realized I can't be a mom." I stare at the patern on the music room floor.
"Hey don't you dare think you can't do it alone! Look at you. You're Rosearia Walker, straight A student, cheerleader. You're smart as hell, you'll go to college even with that baby and you'll fucking rule. You'll be some successful business woman." He says trying to cheer me up.
"I wanted to be a songwriter or singer. Stupid dream. Or just work as a waitress in town." I didn't know what to do, I haven't thought of it much.
"Singer! Come on, let's hear the vocals! I have to hear." He sat back in his seat looking at me with a goofy smile.
"What! No, not right now. I couldn't. Okay listen!" I excitedly giggle. "Wait no I can't, not right now." I laughed. He smiled laughing at me. "Ouch." I placed a hand on my belly again adjusting in my seat.
"Hard kick?" He chuckled as my smile never left my face.
"Yeah, a soccer player." I joked.
"Or a metal head, head banging and thrashing. You know..." He started moving his head, hair going everywhere. I laughed at him as he shook his curls.
"I'd get whiplash!" I joked as he stopped.
"Listen, my bands playing this weekend, I want you to come?" He asked.
"Oh cool! Where?" I asked.
"This place right outside of town. It's nearly like a night time bakery, you can get tea and a cupcake and watch. Like a poetry club basically." He tells me.
"I'll be there, Munson." I smile.
"I'll reserve a table for you." He says smiling all goofy as the bell rings.
"Remember the plan?" I asked as we started cleaning up, though he did most of the cleaning not letting me bend over.
"Skip last period, meet by the water fountain." He confirmed.
"Perfect. Thanks so much, you're a great friend." I hugged him quickly before walking to the door. "Hey if you happen to find a cherry flavored tootsie pop, I'm craving it so bad!" I laugh before walking out of the room to class.